Those thoughts arise because, in fact, marriage is the attempt of two incompatible people to live together compatibly. No two people are the same. No matter how passionate and fervent love may be, differences exist.

The art of learning how to love one another and not force "oneness" is reflected in the vows we take at marriage. We say we will love, honor and cherish what that person is now—not what we hope they will become (Ephesians 5:21-33).