All of us desire to be understood by others.  Unfortunately, many disagreements end with nobody understanding anybody.

If I showed you a green ball we would all agree that it is green.  If I showed you a blue ball we would all agree it is blue.  What if I had a ball that was green on one side and blue on the other?  What if I positioned the ball so one person would be looking at the green side and another person at the blue side.  Both would vehemently argue the color of the ball and be partly right and partly wrong.  There could be no understanding, or agreement, until they both could see the entire ball.

Most of the time, when another person is talking, you're thinking about what you want to say next instead of really listening.  Active listening allows you to respond with, "If I understand, this is what you are saying..." and then repeat what the person communicated.  One of Stephen Covey's Seven Habits of Highly Effective People is "seek first to understand, and then to be understood."

This means that you have to restrain your desire to make your opinion heard until you see the ball from the other person's viewpoint.  This doesn't mean you have to agree with the person's opinion.  You just have to be able to articulate his or her position.  Only then can you really engage that person from their viewpoint instead of just trying to force them into your viewpoint.

It is written in Proverbs 18:13, "He who answers a matter before he hears it, it is folly and shame to him."