Single Parent America

by Darris McNeely

Submitted August 21, 2005

The United States has reached a sad milestone. The Census Bureau reported on August 16th that the most common American home in which children are being reared has only a one parent. What do you think of when you hear the word, "family?" Fifteen years ago, it was a home with father, mother and one or more children living together. There were 25 million American households when the 1990 census was taken. Ten years later, the 2000 census revealed that the number of single parent families surged past the number of two parent households to become the leading category. The Census Bureau projects continued rapid growth in this type of American family - the single parent home.

(Click here to read Cheryl Wetzstein's full article on the Census report: "More Homes is U.S. Go Solo," August 17, 2005, The Washington Times.)     

When I call this change a sad milestone, I do not mean to disparage those single mothers and single fathers who  are providing a safe, secure and nurturing home for their child or children. Many indeed do a marvelous job, attested to by the successful lives their children are living.

Yet, I do not believe that the collective future of America or its children is as bright as it could be otherwise. It is often noted that one of the primary reasons for the collapse of Rome's mighty empire was the disintegration of the home. Can the mighty United States expect that its great power would continue, regardless of the health of its families? I cringe at the prospect of America exporting this part of its culture around the world.

For the sake of its emotional, intellectual and spiritual development, I wish that every child in America could grow up in the home of his or her natural father and mother.

I do not wish merely that their father and mother would stay together, but that they would remain in a loving partnership. Should parents stay together "for the sake of the children?" Yes,  but not for that reason alone. Parents should keep their families in tact for their sake and for the sake of the broader family - grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins.

Parents should keep their families together for the sake of their community, for children from these homes are less likely to use drugs, steal, engage in premarital sex, become pregnant or make someone pregnant.

Do people who dearly want to keep their homes together sometimes find themselves going through a divorce, creating still another single parent home?
Yes, they do. Indeed, many of you reading these words may find yourselves part of the mushrooming "new" category of family, in spite of your personal commitment to marry for life. It takes the commitment and the ability of both parents to accomplish the ideal.

And, more than ever, providing a two-parent home for your children also requires the involvement and the blessing of God. Please take advantage of our free offer of two highly informative booklets on dating,  marriage, child rearing--all from the point of view of a personal relationship with the Creator of marriage and family. They are, Making Life Work and Marriage & Family: The Missing Dimension.