What If We Supported Girls With Pregnancies Due to Tragedies?

Submitted June 7, 2013

Source: Stock.Xchng/nem_youth

Imagine being under the age of 14, pregnant due to rape and/or incest, and not knowing where to turn. This topic is often brought up during discussions on abortion. It is during situations like this that many people feel abortion would be acceptable. What do you think?

As a teen I became familiar with a similar situation. A young girl with very little understanding about what was happening to her life, her body, and her family, became pregnant. The family decided the best course of action was to give the baby up for adoption. If the pregnancy had been discovered earlier they would have opted for an abortion. As the baby grew within her belly, I found myself grateful that an abortion had not been performed. You may think that is a cruel thing to say, but there was more going on than most people would assume.

Even as young as she was, she would place her hand on her belly to feel the movement. At times you could see a smile cross her face as she thought about that baby kicking around in there. She wasn't going to keep it, she was angry with the world, she hated everyone and everything, but that life inside of her could make her smile. It seemed to be a bright spot in a sea of darkness.

I often thought about how an abortion would have changed her even more. She already hated the world, would she have hated herself for ending that life? Would her family have tried to go back to life as usual and forget that it had ever happened? Would she have been left to deal with much of what was taking place in her mind and her body, alone?

She and I, along with twelve other girls were enrolled in a program for unwed teens. We received counseling; education, parenting classes, and everything we would need to begin our lives as new mothers or to prepare for giving our babies up for adoption. She was receiving the counseling she needed, not only for what had happened to her but to prepare her for the birth and what to expect afterward. She was treated with loving care, supported, and encouraged. She was told that life would go on, she had a future ahead of her, all was not lost. She was given hope.

When I first met her, she could not look me in the eyes. She was embarrassed, ashamed, afraid, and felt alone in a world that had been so cruel to her. During the months we got to know one another, I saw her change. What was the difference? I believe it was an acceptance of what had happened and an understanding that no one blamed her. It was a feeling of life growing inside of her, a feeling that is miraculous no matter how young you may be.

What if we stopped talking about sparing young girls from suffering through a pregnancy that has been brought about through terrible circumstances and began supporting them? What if we allowed them an opportunity to face the mirror and not be ashamed or embarrassed? What if we equipped them with the tools to face a terrible and traumatic event and to recognize that their life is not over? What if we allowed them the opportunity to appreciate the life within and accept that it too needs a chance? It too is only a victim of circumstance and cruelty.

I believe in doing so we could change two lives. We could give both the girl and her child a chance. Abortion is not an answer. All it does is hide the truth until it is buried so deep that she may never recover from the scars.

Terrible things happen. When they do we must do our best to love one another and care for one another, that includes the unborn child which may be the result of rape or incest.

In Romans:8:28, we learn that all thing work for good, if we love Him. What better way to honor Him than to honor life, and to help those who are the most helpless.

Maybe more women should be offered dignity, love, and support during a crisis such as this. Maybe if the shame and embarrassment were recognized and life given a chance, they too would place their hand on their bellies, and when all else seems lost, smile.

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lkimble3's picture

Thank you for your post Sherrie. So many people say they are pro-life yet do not support the lives of the mothers and children after they are born. And, this includes all children, not just those born from tragedy.


KARS's picture

Always remember this child is a blessing from above.

It is the Father's choice to terminate a pregnancy not us. An example would be when the LORD stopped a nation of women from delivering their unborn. These women were growing quite large. In the end there was repentance and they bore their children.

Leave it in God's hands; He knows what's best.

Support for the victimized mother in love, mercy, and compassion can make a big difference in her life.

Giving her baby a fighting chance to live life to the full is also good. How many people of the past have gone on to became famous scientists, musicians, etc. in their lives because they were allowed to live?


Romans2verse4's picture

Thank you for your past two blogs on this issue. Like your friend in your first blog At 16 years old, I became sexually immoral which subsequently led me to choose an abortion. I can say as the apostle Paul did in 1 Timothy knew He hated the sin I committed and felt condemnation, guilt and shame. There are many more details to my story, but to keep things short, I would like to say that through God desiring that I be restored to him, He gently and kindly led to a bible study called “Forgiven and Set Free“, through which He then did an amazing miracle and actually used my experience for His good purpose because I love Him and He called me. Like you mentioned in your first blog, I did not have that well meaning person in my life as you did, but because of God's grace in my life, I became one, and have since worked in crisis pregnancy centers, counseling young women in the same situation I was, speaking the truth in LOVE to them, regarding the choice of abortion, many not only choosing to keep their babies but also desiring to have Christ in the their lives and walk a new way. I have also facilitated and counseled many groups of women who have suffered with the guilt and shame of a past abortion that now know forgiveness and freedom and are now able to share the Good News of the Gospel of Jesus and live out their calling, many now leading groups themselves and serving in crisis pregnancy centers. I have spoken to large groups regarding the sanctity of life and given my personal testimony, that has brought others forth to realize the truth of the affects of abortion and desire God’s forgiveness and healing. God even led me and provided two trips to Israel to serve in this area and live with a family who operated a pro-life ministry there for three months helping them. All this I give glory to God for doing, not of my own, it is a miracle that He truly does take all things in our life and use it for His good Romans:8:28, and gives beauty for ashes Isaiah:61:3, yes,the body needs to be part of the solution.


peeps's picture

This was so well said. If only we gave women the support and counselling they need instead of turning to abortion. To end an innocent life, a gift from God, in such a horrible manner is tragic.


tangerine17's picture

Beautiful post. "She was given hope" is possibly the most powerful statement you wrote... hope is stronger than any tragedy we may endure-- and true hope is what God offers us. Thank you for your article!


dziwczyna's picture

Great article.

I just want to point out that a few years ago I stumbled upon statistics for abortion in a top Canadian newspaper. They broke down the percentages of those getting abortions: less than 1% were due to rape. 3% were due to medical reasons. So the remaining 96% were due to lifestyle choices. 25% were actually married women!

It is grossly overrated when people say we NEED abortion for rape/incest/medical reasons, as the stats show that it's a very minute percentage of all abortions. It shows that people really are ignorant of what is really going on and are being deceived.

There are also a lot of cases of repeat abortions. This shows the hardening of one's heart that sin does.

Also, in Ontario for every 100 babies born to 15-19 years olds, 152 are aborted. So like you said, where is the support?


ahboise's picture

If your reading this chances are you or someone you know has been effected by a similar tragedy. My prayers are that God will comfort you. And I would encourage the rest of us to get educated on how build up, edify, and encourage. Our words are more powerful than we think and they can help heal and comfort or unfortunately do more damage. We need to do everything we can to protect children and educate them.
I was excited to learn about some special bible study's being offered at the up coming feast of Tabernacles this fall! :)


Mrs.AP's picture

Beautifully said

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