What's the difference between lust and natural attraction? How do we control our minds when we see a beautiful girl or a handsome guy?
You are a guy, and a beautiful girl walks into the room. In a nanosecond you size up the situation: simple but modest clothing, a kind voice and a million-dollar smile. Yep. She's definitely a woman, and you are attracted.
You are a girl, and a handsome guy walks into the room. Your brain tells you that he's good-looking, but you tell yourself to be careful because he may also be a jerk. So you watch carefully as he treats everyone with respect, and then he begins paying attention to you. Oh, no. Now what are you going to do? You are attracted to this guy.
The above scenarios have been playing out for a long time. The reason they keep happening over and over again is because this is the way God created us. Normally we tend to be attracted to the opposite sex. Reflecting this understanding, God explained from the very beginning that "a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife" (Genesis 2:24Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.
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This natural attraction of a man to a woman and a woman to a man is what leads to marriage—the only sexual relationship approved by God. The apostle Paul described any other sexual union as being immoral and "against nature" (Romans 1:20-27 [20] For the invisible things of him from the creation of the world are clearly seen, being understood by the things that are made, even his eternal power and Godhead; so that they are without excuse:
[20] For the invisible things of him from the creation of the world are clearly seen, being understood by the things that are made, even his eternal power and Godhead; so that they are without excuse:
[21] Because that, when they knew God, they glorified him not as God, neither were thankful; but became vain in their imaginations, and their foolish heart was darkened.
[21] Because that, when they knew God, they glorified him not as God, neither were thankful; but became vain in their imaginations, and their foolish heart was darkened.
[22] Professing themselves to be wise, they became fools,
[22] Professing themselves to be wise, they became fools,
[23] And changed the glory of the uncorruptible God into an image made like to corruptible man, and to birds, and fourfooted beasts, and creeping things.
[23] And changed the glory of the uncorruptible God into an image made like to corruptible man, and to birds, and fourfooted beasts, and creeping things.
[24] Wherefore God also gave them up to uncleanness through the lusts of their own hearts, to dishonour their own bodies between themselves:
[24] Wherefore God also gave them up to uncleanness through the lusts of their own hearts, to dishonour their own bodies between themselves:
[25] Who changed the truth of God into a lie, and worshipped and served the creature more than the Creator, who is blessed for ever. Amen.
[25] Who changed the truth of God into a lie, and worshipped and served the creature more than the Creator, who is blessed for ever. Amen.
[26] For this cause God gave them up unto vile affections: for even their women did change the natural use into that which is against nature:
[26] For this cause God gave them up unto vile affections: for even their women did change the natural use into that which is against nature:
[27] And likewise also the men, leaving the natural use of the woman, burned in their lust one toward another; men with men working that which is unseemly, and receiving in themselves that recompence of their error which was meet.
[27] And likewise also the men, leaving the natural use of the woman, burned in their lust one toward another; men with men working that which is unseemly, and receiving in themselves that recompence of their error which was meet.
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We all know that it takes a man and a woman to have a baby, so it's no surprise that the husband-wife relationship is referred to as a natural union. These natural unions are God-ordained and intended to be pleasurable and, at the same time, sustain the population. Marriage is truly a priceless gift from our Creator that's good for us and good for society at large!
But sadly, this natural attraction for the opposite sex has also led to a great deal of sin. Not only is it sinful to have sex prior to marriage (1 Corinthians 6:18Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body.
See All...) and sinful to have sex with someone other than one's husband or wife (Exodus 20:14Thou shalt not commit adultery.
See All...), Jesus also said, "Whoever looks at a woman to lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart" (Matthew 5:28But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart.
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So what's the difference between lust and natural attraction? How do we control our minds when we see a beautiful girl or a handsome guy?
The answer is boundaries. Natural attraction can easily morph into lust if there are no boundaries. God's boundaries regarding sex keep us safe and secure. They protect our hearts and our bodies for our future mates. After we are married, they protect our unions. They help us understand that seeing a beautiful girl or a handsome guy is not a sin. And they help us understand that we can't entertain sinful thoughts.
In this issue we examine the subject of love versus infatuation, as well as dating and the popularity of romance novels. We hope these articles will help you learn where to establish your boundaries! VT
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