Sermon Transcript — April 5, 2003
Some years ago, at Ambassador College, we had a very interesting class. This was a special class given to the graduating seniors and to those individuals who were going out for a summer to local churches to be ministerial trainees, to be ministerial assistants. It was also some men who were sent out on baptizing tours. The class was called — Soul Searching—502; 502 being graduate type of situation.
Now what they did was, they would have the head of the college administration or the head of the ministry sit down with all of these men, maybe ten, fifteen, twenty, twenty-five men, and he would then take us apart, one man at a time, and begin to tell us faults and our weaknesses of each one of the leaders and make it public knowledge before all the other men. And you'd sit there, and you'd know that you were about to be told in front of all these guys what they didn't like about you. And it was supposed to be humbling, and after it was all said and done, we were flat as a pancake, an unleavened one, and also you could actually say that we were so flat by the whole situation that you could have left the door closed and you could have slid us under the door, because we felt like we'd been rolled over by a steam roller.
And most of us didn't go to lunch. Most of us just simply went back to our prayer rooms, and we prayed for deliverance from our problems. It was quite a situation, but it was preparing us to go out into the field to deal with our vanity and with our human flaws, and somebody had to humble us in order to be prepared to go out and serve these people. It was anything but humbling. It was actually very deeply humiliating, and it was very, very hard, because many of the men literally left the room crying because of the way that it was done. Well, it didn't last very long. I don't think it lasted more than a few years, and it ended after I left college, so there must have been some message there for Richard.
I began to realize from that experience that God is the only one that can really humble a human being. That really men can humiliate, but only God can humble. And as we begin to focus our attention on God's Passover, which we consider the most sacred and solemn occasion of the entire year with the footwashing, the bread and the wine and the realization of what Christ went through on our behalf, I think the Passover is, for us, truly a humbling experience.
The Passover really has two great purposes, and I'd like to discuss those with you today, especially the second one. It is the renewal of this wonderful covenant that we made with God at baptism. Mr. Pulliam called it, "our vows," the renewing of our vows that we made with God. And secondly, it is a time when we deeply search our soul where we are allowing ourselves to meditate more closely on the sinfulness, or as I describe it simply, convicting us of the sinfulness of who and what we are. But this is something that is not done just for the Passover. This is something which is really the culmination of the entire year as we meet with Christ, as we meet with one another, and as we partake of the Passover, it really is the culmination of an entire year, but in reality, it is a new beginning.
Now the Passover pictures, in that sense of the word, a new beginning in the plan of God, doesn't it. But in reality, what you're doing is you're looking back on an entire year and evaluating that entire year in relationship to what you've learned. And really, when God works with us, He really works with us in a humbling way, not in a humiliating way. We come to see Christ's sacrifice for us; we come to see our need for that particular sacrifice for us. But we also see ourselves in what I describe as a deep soul-searching where God is able to help us be convicted of our sins and bring about something that is a developed thing starting before baptism and goes all the way through for the rest of our lives. And that's where I want to go today. I want to go to something more than just the event, but the process, the procedure, that brought us to the event and takes us beyond that event, and it's called, "a repentant spirit."
I think if we were to look at it in its proper way, we would recognize that it is God who convicts a man, or a woman, of their sinfulness. It is God Who convicts of our need for forgiveness and cleansing. But that doesn't happen just this week or next week, as we prepare for the Passover. I think we recognize that it is God who initiates our desire to turn to Him in repentance and faith. It is an ongoing thing. And it is something that God's Holy Spirit is working with to bring about a process and a wonderful procedure, and it is God who gives us in the end the strength to understand and to do these things. He motivates us. He motivates us to renew our devotion to Him as we're going to do at the Passover and to make our calling and our election sure. That is why it tells us we are to work out our own salvation with fear and trembling, because we know that it is God is at work in us, enabling us, empowering us according to His purpose.
I believe that when you begin to look at what I'm going to take you through this afternoon, the Passover really pictures the goodness of God. It pictures the goodness of God. According to Romans 2:4, it says:
Romans 2:4 — ". . .the goodness of God leads (us) (you) to repentance." The goodness of God leads us to repentance. So what I would like to do today is I would like to examine; I would like to examine this whole process that we go through, and perhaps give us a little bit better insight into some of the things that God may be asking of us as members of the Church of God.
You know, among the very first words Jesus spoke when he launched His public work of teaching and disciple-making was the word — repent. When He began in Mark 1:14, He came preaching the gospel of the kingdom of God, and He said:
Mark 1:15 — "The time is fulfilled, (and) the kingdom of God is at hand." And He said, "Repent, and believe the gospel." And all through His teachings, He always emphasized this concept of repentance. Jesus was talking about the tower of Siloam that fell upon these individuals. And the question was asked, He said, "Are these greater sinners than everybody else?" And He says, "No, not at all." He said, "But except you repent, you shall all like these people perish," He said. So, He continued to amplify the concept of repentance.
So, let's ask the question to begin with, as we observe this season, "What does the word mean?" There's a simple definition from Vines. It simply means, "To perceive." It simply means, "To discern." It simply means, "To have a better understanding of something that you have to remove from yourself." It means, "To change the mind, the seat of moral reflection," as he says in his definition.
Repentance carries with it the act of opening you up, of opening up, as we say, the soul and naming what is found inside. Basically, repentance is the act of opening the soul, that is, we use the term — soul — as your innermost being. That's why I'm using the term — soul; I'm simply meaning — your innermost being, and it is naming what you find there. It's not always a happy experience, and the reality of repentance is not a happy experience for the best of us.
It's kind of like opening the door to a subbasement in which trash has been permitted to accumulate, and the opening of the soul actually reveals what is really supremely unattractive. It's really things that have been hidden and pushed down into that particular compartment that are there. No wonder many people find it totally convenient to put the soul under lock and key and run from it as fast as our little legs can take us. And the answer to that is the reality of having to do this before we take the Passover, and the reality of what needs to be done as we process through the year of this whole thing of repentance.
Actually, repent simply means to acknowledge this mess in which sometimes we find ourselves and seek something new. It's a very simple thing, but it's so very, very hard to do. Repent means to turn away from old ways. You've heard that, or turn away from old attitudes, to embrace new ones. And is that not the process of conversion? Is that not the process of growth that takes place? I think repentance also brings about what I describe as a humble demeanor before God. You don't argue with Him. You don't justify yourself with Him. You simply become quiet, and you're unresisting in your disposition. It's kind of like the prayer of David, if you're remember, when he simply said, "Have mercy upon me, for I have sinned."
Now, for just a moment, let's take a look at this thing of opening the soul. Let's take a look at and evaluate today some of the things about opening the soul. Years ago, in the ministry, when we were young men, we talked about a concept of developing a "sin list." Developing a "sin list." And I remember there was a young man that I had baptized in Vancouver, Canada, about 1963. And he came over for the Days of Unleavened Bread, and one of the things that we talked about was coming to have a discernment, or a perception, of your sins. And so I recommended to him to develop what I described as a "sin list." That is when you prepare for the Passover, you need to put down those areas that you need to work on that you know are problems. And so, he said to me, "I did that. The first year," he said, "I came up with two things." He said, "The next year I came up with five things. The next year, I came up with twenty things. And now that you're my pastor over here," he said, "I've got a problem."
I said, "Why?"
He said, "Because I'm up to seventy-five right now." And he says, "You know what? I think I'm going backwards."
And I said, "Oh, no, you're not going backwards. You're moving down a very, very good road, because it leads to something which is most important. It leads to something which is most important, and that is to a realization that is being given to you by the Holy Spirit of God."
Let's go over to John 16 for just a moment. John 16 and notice what Jesus talked about when He said that the Holy Spirit would be given and something that would happen when the Holy Spirit is given.
The young man was very sincere; the young man was worried about going backward, but the reality of this sin list that he was developing over those four or five years was nothing more than that which comes to a human being as he studies, as he prays, as he fasts, and as he works with the society which he works, the church in which he works, and God working with that individual. It tells you over beginning in John 16:5—
John 16:5 — ". . .now I go my way to Him that sent Me; and none of you asks Me, 'Where are you going?'
Verse 6: "But because I have said these things unto you, sorrow has filled your heart.
Verse 7: "Nevertheless I tell you the truth; It is expedient (for you) that I go away: for if I go not away, the Comforter will not come unto you; but if I depart, I will send him unto you." Now notice some of the things that He does. This was gone through by Mr. Smith, I believe, last year, or the year before last, when he said:
Verse 8: "And when he (is come) (comes), he will reprove the world of sin, and of righteousness, and of judgment:
Verse 9: "Of sin, because they believe not on me;
Verse 10: "Of righteousness, because I go to my Father, and you see me no more;
Verse 11: "Of judgment, because the prince of this world is judged."
Verse 12: And He said, "I have (yet) many things to say unto you, but you cannot bear them now." And that was the way this young man was before he was baptized. He just couldn't understand; he couldn't grasp, and when he was baptized, he began to have a perception.
Now, let's stop for a moment, and ask the question, "What happens here?" When you are called by God, the Holy Spirit is really working from the outside in. It's working toward coming in and working with your mind from the point of view of "from the outside in." And it's kind of like pecking away at you and opening your mind to things that you need to understand — basic things about God's word, God's law, God's principles. This is where we start. It's a very beautiful thing that happens. Your mind is open to one principle, or one point, and then another one, as you obey them, He gives you another one, and another one and another one, and so what happened to this young man when he was baptized, the Spirit no longer was pecking away, trying to get to him and into his mind to teach him things, but now the Holy Spirit had united with the spirit in man and it produced a whole new approach. It was now a part of his innermost being. It was a part of his mind; whatever part of that mind is begotten by God, it did happen to this individual, and he now began to see things in a totally different light than he saw when he first began before he was baptized. And the process of conversion, the process of knowledge and understanding, and the beginning of wisdom came to this young man.
John 16:13 — "Howbeit when he, the Spirit of truth, is come, he will guide you into all truth:" Now here's the priceless thing about that. Truth in knowledge about certain things is wonderful, but what the Holy Spirit does is that when it comes to impart to you the ability to have an understanding, it gives you an understanding of something that you perhaps didn't have before. When I started, I learned about God's law. I started keeping the Sabbath. I understood about some of the principles about tithing, and that sort of thing. It was what I call, keeping the letter of the law.
And gradually over a period of time, I began to realize that there were things that I needed to do, and when I did them, more knowledge was given to me, but what happened to me then was the fact that when I was baptized, a whole unique approach to myself and to the world around me became a part of my thinking. I began to focus on things in a different way; I began to see things differently, outwardly, and I also began to get in touch with the fact that inside my being, and as this young man began to realize, inside his being there was something going on to allow him to have reflections inwardly of himself. And he did not have those things before, and now instead of doing things where he saw, you know, one, two, three, four, five points, he began to realize it was focusing more on what was causing him to have those points being revealed to him. And so what we see is simply a wonderful beginning of a process of conversion that as you walk this road, God begins to give you of yourself. You see, repentance being an ongoing thing starts with breaking the letter of the law, and then it comes to an understanding of breaking the spirit of the law, then it comes to understand what causes the individual to do what he does.
You see, there's an interesting thing in the sacrifices that we were studying last week in ABC. There are five sacrifices that are given. One's called a burnt offering. A second one's called a meal offering. The burnt offering and the meal offering are not involved with sin. The third offering is one called simply a peace offering. It is not involved also in sin. It's involved in worship; it's involved in unity; it's involved in a development between you and God, a relationship. That's what three of the five sacrifices are about. But there are two sacrifices that have to do with sin, and both of them are offered away from the altar, away from God's presence. The first one is called — the sin offering; and the second one is called — the trespass offering. The trespass offering was coming to understand what you were doing against a brother, what you had done, such as lying, or stealing, or some particular thing that had to do with an action toward a brother. It was simply what I would describe as — doing.
Now the sin offering was that which allowed the individual to come to realize that he was a sinner, and it began to help us understand that when you look at the sin offering, it has to do with who you are, what you are as a being. And the Bible pointed out there in those cases that each one of the categories of people were people that were sinners. So we realize that there are two aspects of growth that come, one is what you do, and two is what you are. And what we see, brethren, is that God by His Holy Spirit guides us from what we do to what we are. And the ability to have that kind of realization is probably one of the most profound growths in an individual's life. That's the conversion that God wants us to come to.
So, over in Romans 7, let's go over there for just a moment. Romans 7, the apostle Paul talks about this in the sense of sin, and he talks about the things that he did. I don't want to break into the entire chapter and read it to you, but I would like to focus in on the fact that we are called to not only do God's law, but we are to understand what causes us to sin. Let's begin in verse 7.
Romans 7:7 — It says: "What shall we say then? Is the law sin?" He said, "God forbid. Nay. I had not known sin, but by the law:" And that is true. It's what you come to realize what you need to be doing or not doing. Then he goes on to say: ". . .but by the law: for I had not known lust, except the law had said, (Thou) (you) shall not covet.
Verse 8: "But sin, (taking occasion) (being shown) by the commandment, wrought in me all manner of (concupiscence) (lust, or covetous desire). For without the law sin was dead." That was the way we were when we were when we were without God's Spirit, without the knowledge of God's particular way. For He said:
Verse 9: ". . . I was alive (once) without the law (once): but when the commandment came, sin revived, and I died.
Verse 10: "And the commandment, which was ordained to life, I found to be unto death."
Then he talks about in Verse 12 the law is holy; he talks then in Verse 13:
Verse 13: ". . .and that which is good (was it) made death unto me?" He said, "God forbid. But sin, that it might appear sin, working death in me by that which is good; that sin by the commandment might become exceeding sinful." Now this is what happened to this young man who started from having two points that he was learning to five, to fifteen, twenty, twenty-five and all the way up to seventy-five, he began to see sin by the commandments, and he began to see principles and points. But Paul says in Verse 14:
Verse 14: "For we know that the law is spiritual: but I am (carnal) (still physical) sold under sin." Now, Verse 15, he begins to bring us to an area that God's Holy Spirit moves you from the doing to the being. He says:
Verse 15: "For that which I do (I allow not) (I do not approve of, or I do not permit, or I do not wish to practice): for what I would, that I do not; but what I hate, that (do) I (do).
Verse 16: "If then I do that which I would not, I consent unto the law that it is good.
Verse 17: ". . . then it is no more I that do it, but sin that dwells in me." Now he begins to reflect not on the doing, but he begins to reflect on the being. And so he says in Verse 21:
Verse 21: "I find then a law, that, when I would do good, evil is present with me." This is what happens in human nature, and he's beginning to say that this particular nature that I have developed over the twenty, thirty, forty, fifty years of life, I begin to realize that it is at work, and I am now going into a struggle between what is right and what this nature wants to do that is contrary. And he said in Verse 22:
Verse 22: "For I delight in the law of God after the inward man:
Verse 23: "But I see another law. . ." That is this human nature that is there, ". . .in my members, warring against the law of my mind, and bringing me into captivity to the law of sin which is in my members.
Verse 24: He said, "O wretched man that I am!" He said, "Who shall deliver me from the body of this death?" And you begin to realize the longer you are in God's church that this particular nature just hangs on. It just hangs on like so much green phlegm on your vocal cords. Have you ever have that happen to you? It just hangs on. It won't let go, and it's a struggle all the time, and some days you do "gooder," and some days, you do "badder." You know, it's just that's the way it is, and you struggle against it. This is what Paul's talking about here, that you move from the concept of the trespass offering of what you do or don't do to a realization of what you need to be. Or to put it another way, the difference between cause and effect.
You see the effect of things when you look at the sins, you have to go back, and you have to ask the question, what causes them? And he said in Verse 25:
Verse 25: "I thank God through Jesus Christ our Lord. So then with the mind I myself serve the law of God; but with the flesh the law of sin." It's a struggle that begins to be seen the longer you're in God's church. It's a part of the Passover season. It's a part of the realities that you go through as you prepare for the Passover, but it's also that which you will go through the entirety of the year, because the goodness of God; the goodness of God will lead you to repentance.
Now, I've come to think of the soul as possessing a kind of a massive archive, a library of what I describe as past events and attitudes. In this archive are what I describe as the roots of motive, the roots of motive, and the direction that an individual has gone, or the pattern of behavior, the way of man, as it says in the book of Proverbs. These things have to be looked at, and what the Passover is all about, and what this repentance is all about when you get past the doing and get down to the being is a matter of having these things placed in the light of day and examining their health as to their well-being. And the search of the archives probably involves a lot of questions, hard questions, sometimes harsh questions that spare nothing. And what has to happen is that you and I have to begin to realize the spiritual life has a great deal to do with subtraction, that is getting rid of these things. Instead of addition, it's getting rid of them, getting them out, getting them removed, cleaning them out of your being. So these questions that I'm about to look at today are questions that initiate this subtraction, because repentance is "getting rid of," and seeing where they're coming from.
You know what happened with Cain? To get Cain to face the reality of the darkness of his soul, God asked him the question, "Why are you angry?" He asked him the question, "Why is your countenance fallen?" You see, Cain was very unhappy because God did not accept his meal offering. The meal offering was without blood. He did not, first of all, surrender himself in his duty toward God by giving a blood sacrifice, by giving a life. He did not do that. He did not see himself in the light of being a sinner in the same way that Abel did. Abel gave of the firstlings of his flock. Abel gave because he recognized in this sense of the word his need for the removal of his sins, and he recognized the need of a life that had to be given. Cain probably was one of those pampered children who was told that he was somebody great, and maybe he even thought of himself more highly than he ought, and so the reality was he did not give the same sacrifice as Abel.
Now, God asked him the question, "Why are you angry?" You know, "Why have you got that look on your face," like a little child when they pout. And He simply said to him, "If you do good shall you not be accepted? And if you don't do well," He said, "sin lies at the door." So He went right to the heart of the man's problem. He was angry with God, and he had that look on his face that simply said that I'm in disagreement with what you have done to me.
You know God did the same thing to a man by the name of Elijah. Elijah had to flee for his life, as we talked about several weeks ago. He went into hiding; he was depressed; he was disappointed. And so God began to ask him the question, "What in the world are you doing here?"
And of course Elijah began to justify, he said, well, you know, "I've been serving You, and I've been doing what I needed to do, and you know, I had to flee for my life." And God began to work with him.
And God went back to him a second time, and He said to Elijah, He said, "What are you doing here?" And once again, Elijah gave the same answer. God wanted to know, "You've got a problem, Elijah. Why are you allowing yourself to be in this frame of mind and in this particular condition?" And what did he do? He went to the heart of the matter.
Elijah feared Jezebel, and he ran for his life. Here were all the eight hundred individuals that were slain, and yet, he ran from one woman. I can't answer that. I'm not going to go there. I'm not that woman. Because we've heard of a lot of women being called by that name, and we ain't going there today, because I'd get myself in more trouble. But the point was, God actually went right to the heart of the problem with Cain; He went right to the heart of the problem with Elijah.
Jesus asked Judas when Judas came to betray Him, what did He say? He said, "Friend, why have you come?" Kind of an interesting question.
"Well, aw, aw, aw, aw, aw," you know, that type of thing.
No, "Why did you come?" You came for a very good reason. You came to have me taken."
Peter over a charcoal fire, was asked the question. He was asked the question simply of Christ. He said, "Do you love me more than these?"
Here were a hundred and fifty-three fish that they had caught. Remember the example? They had dipped over one side; they caught nothing. They were up all night getting nothing. The second time around, He said, "Dip on the other side," and he came up with one hundred fifty-three fish. Probably an example of what they would be doing for the rest of their lives, except spiritually speaking. They would become fishers of men. But the point was, He targeted Peter.
Now, I want to go there for just a moment because I think that it shows you that God was working with Peter to show him his problem. This is over in John 21:15. It's a most interesting example that is found here, John 21:15 —
John 21:15 — "(So) (And) when they had dined, Jesus said to Simon Peter, 'Simon, son of Jonas, do you love Me more than these?' " Now Jesus Christ used the word — Agape — from the original word, agape, and He said, "Do you agape. . ." that is the love of God, ". . .do you love me?" (Do you have the love of God toward me more than these fish?) "He says, 'Yes, Lord, you know that I. . .' " And he used a different word from Christ. He used the word — phileo — which simply is a word that has to do with tender affection and devotion. He didn't use the same word that Christ used. Agape love is total devotion to God. He came down to simply saying that "You know, I have this constant affection and devotion to You."
Then He said to Peter, the second time, He said:
Verse 16 — "Do you love me?" And He used the word again — agape, or the word from the original, agape. "And he said unto Him, 'Yes, Lord: You know that I. . .' " And he used the word — phileo — again. He wouldn't use the same word as Christ. And finally, Jesus came down to him and He said unto him a third time:
Verse 17 — "He said unto him a third time, 'Simon, son of Jonas,' (phileo) 'do you love Me?' " And Peter was grieved. . ." Do you know why he was grieved? He was grieved, it says, because ". . .He said unto him the third time, 'Do you love me?' " But Jesus went down below the waterline and He got right down to the heart of the man. He got right down to the root of motives. He got down to the direction of Peter. He got down to his attitude, and He took one giant bite of Peter in that particular case, and He said, "Do you love me?" ". . .and he said unto Him, 'Lord, You know all things; You know that I (love) (phileo) You.' And Jesus said unto him, 'Feed My sheep.'"
These are questions that you have to ask yourself. These are things that you have to look at as a human being. Saul of Tarsus, the apostle Paul later, was asked the question: "Why are you persecuting Me?" by Jesus Christ when a vision came to him. I describe these as thought questions; I describe them as targeting not the mind, but the depth of an individual, getting right down to what I describe as the innermost being of an individual; some people would call it — the soul or the heart. These are things that actually we must begin to understand, brethren, that as we grow in repentance, and as we grow in conversion that we have to really look at these things that are not targeting the mind and just having a philosophical answer, but the reality of the very being of an individual, your very bowels and thinking, your inward emotions that you go through. It's as if some were being told, "Look at yourself. Look deep into yourself. For once in your life, go below the waterline and search the soul." What is there? And why is it driving your attitudes and your actions. This is what the Passover is all about. This is what conversion is all about, this is what the growth of the Holy Spirit is all about. This is the realization of the sin offering, when you begin to understand who and what you are as a human being.
These are hard questions, and they must be asked in God's presence. They can't be avoided by us taking some version of the fifth amendment, and so, what I'd like to do today is to give you five, five questions, and I'd like to evaluate them with you just a little bit and see where you are in your growth processes of conversion. Let me give you them:
Number one: Whom am I really trying to please? Whom am I really trying to please? This is the first of the questions, and it centers on the issue of whose good opinion we find the most important to cultivate. We were made to live to please God. Let's go over to Psalm 103 for just a moment. And I'd like to read Psalm 103:1-2. We were made to live to please God. The soul is never more functional, the inner being of an individual, the satisfaction of your life is never so positive as it is when the entire focus is on the pleasure of God, when it's on the pleasure of God. Notice what He says in Psalm 103:1-2.
Psalm 103:1 — He said: "Bless the Lord, O my soul: and all that is (within) (in) me, bless His holy name.
Verse 2: And He said: "Bless the Lord, O my soul, and forget not all (of) His benefits." When you and I in our motion are seeking the pleasure of our Maker, God the Father, and Jesus Christ, I think we recognize that there is a tremendous frame of mind from which you can work, but when we start going down deep and look at things below the surface, and we begin to realize that human beings sometimes lower their sights and aim at other kinds of approval. You know what I'm talking about. Human beings expanding tremendous amount of energies to do things that simply are substitute gods for what they should be obedient to. The entertainer seeks the approval of the audience; the workaholic pursues the approval of a father who never gave him a sense of values. The athlete seeks the approval signified by the gold medal, or the higher paying contract. Most of us are not in these categories, but I think we are all prone to similar or parallel approvals that we try to go through. We want to know — is there someone that is there that is pleased with us, who will stamp value upon us. It goes through the life of every last human being, and the truth is simply that when you don't recognize whom you are trying to please, you get off the track, and you seek after substitute gods.
I think the soul within a person who lives to please something less than God is a diminutive soul. It's an individual that is simply not going to be pleasing God at all. And so we read in Psalm 103:1, 2: simply it says, "Bless the Lord, O my soul. . ." Put that as your first concept of whom am I really trying to please?
Number Two: What needs am I trying to meet? What needs am I trying to meet? I think we recognize that there are many, many insecurities among God's people, and sometimes there are insecurities that we try to pamper, that we try to develop and take care of. And there are feelings that we have within us about a number of things in life that we go through. These questions I would describe are the second query that take us below the water line. It's simply we recognize that we face as a result of having lived in this world a number of things that have occurred to us, that have hurt us, that we've gone through in life, and we need help to get rid of them sometimes and overcome them. And we pay people large amounts of money to help us go down in what I call — the subbasement of life and be able to try to draw those things out and to work on some of those things. And of course, we have an industry that has been developed simply based on that particular approach.
But I think that we recognize that some of that simply is going to create problems for us if we don't recognize that we must come to the realization that there are needs that we have, and that there are insecurities that people tend to pamper, and there are feelings that we tend to store up. I think we've all been hurt by people; we've all been hurt by situations that have occurred. And sometimes you have to let go of a lot of those things, and it's very hard for a human being to let go. I think we ought to consider that the Passover season is the time when we learn how to try to strive to forget perpetrators and turning your back on the patterns of behavior that one has developed within themselves, these needs—driven patterns and begin to get rid of them and to do what Jesus Christ did, and that is to recognize that you have to simply forgive a lot of things that have happened.
I can honestly say that over the years of growing up, I can look back, and I can say I can blame this, or I can blame that, or I can blame something else. But the question is — am I going to simply do that, or am I going to let go of those things, and am I going to give myself over to the ability that Christ says I must ultimately come to — the perfect frame of mind when Christ, on the cross, said, "Father," you know simply, "forgive them for they don't know what they're doing."
This is a very difficult area. This is a great struggle that human beings go through, and I think you come to the realization that as a human being, sooner or later you have to have a certain sense of toughness directed toward others. It is a self-directive thing where you simply say, "Enough. I'm not going to permit myself to be disabled by the events that are in my archive, all the things that I have suffered from." I think they have to be past history.
I thought it was very interesting that, I think it was Ariel Sharon said this about a year ago, when it came to Yasser Arafat, and all the struggles that they were having, and finally, Ariel Sharon said, "Yasser Arafat has become irrelevant." And I thought that was priceless, because of the fact that he said simply, you know, "He is not going to effect what I am going to do. I am going to go on, and I'm going to do what I need to do, and he has become irrelevant to me."
And I think that's where you sometimes have to go with the problems of life that you have to face, that you ultimately have to say, simply, "I'm going to let go of it, and it's going to become irrelevant."
And many of us have to learn to do that. Let's go over to Genesis 50 and see this in action. It's a very hard one to understand, but here in Genesis 50 we see a man by the name of Joseph, and we see that in Joseph's case, he went through some terribly difficult times, and as a servant of God, you notice an attitude that he had.
If we evaluate Joseph of Egypt, and we see what he modeled in this kind of thinking, we begin to realize that he was smothered by his father. He was resented and rejected by his brothers. He was dehumanized at first as a slave. He was falsely accused, and he was imprisoned, and as an attempted rapist, he was set aside for so many years in prison, and he was forgotten by those whom he had tried to serve beneficially.
Joseph had every reason to think of to drift into what I describe simply as a paralysis, a psychic paralysis, to shrivel up and die. If any man had the right to catalog unmet needs and powerful insecurities and feelings of resentment and anger, it was this man. What there is about Joseph that caused him to renounce the right to wallow in the scandals and the problems of his personal archive, I don't know. I don't know, but there was something that in this particular individual I am very, very impressed with. The Bible offers no psychological analysis, but it does, however, reveal something of Joseph's perspective when he stands face-to-face with his brothers in a dreamed-filled moment. You know the story. They have bowed down before him. They are weeping for fear that they will lose their life for the actions of the past. They had the power, now he has it, and Joseph speaks to them in a different frame of mind. He speaks to them what I describe as speaking out of a frame of mind in the depths of his soul. And notice what he says here in Genesis 50:19 —
Genesis 50:19 — "And Joseph said unto them, 'Fear not: for am I in the place of God?'
Verse 20: " 'But as for you, you thought evil against me; but God meant it unto good, to bring to pass, as it is this day, to save much people alive.' " Wow. All I can say is, "Wow." I think we can say we have a long way to go as human beings to be like Joseph, don't we? It goes on to say:
Verse 21: " 'Now therefore fear you not: I will nourish you, and your little ones.' And he comforted them, and spoke kindly unto them." He spoke kindly unto them. Today, probably there would be advisors that would tell both Joseph and Jesus, you know, you would be healthier if you screamed, if you punished, if you transferred your anger over to your victimizers. But the Bible offers an alternative, one that proposes that we renounce the holding of our feelings, our anxieties, through forgiveness and mercy-giving as Joseph did, as Joseph did.
Number Three: Question number three that we have to face: With whom and what am I competing? Human beings, we recognize, especially in the United States of America, are very competitive. We are very, very competitive souls. I can remember years ago when I used to play racquetball, and I played the game with the younger guys, and I played just about even with them. And then I got older, and I began to notice that I was beginning to lose it, and some of my friends said, "Well, you lost the eye of the tiger, Richard. You need to get that again."
And I said, "No, I think I lost something in my giddy-up." I think that is actually what has happened. But I think you begin to realize that sometimes this competition, you can keep up with it for a while, and then all of a sudden, you begin to realize that you can't keep up with the boys, the younger boys, as we used to say. And you begin to realize that that competition can get you into awful trouble.
But the soul cannot be. The innermost being of an individual cannot be healthy when one compares himself or herself to others. I think we die a little bit every time we get involved in a lifestyle that competes. It gives way to what I describe as destructive forces of rivalry and envy and jealousy. It's all a part of that thinking that goes on; it's a great struggle. It doesn't stop if you're a minister; it doesn't stop if you're a deacon or a deaconess; it's there. You have to realize that all of us have to face the fact that we face those things.
Oscar Wilde told an interesting story. He said this. He said, "The devil was crossing the Libyan desert when he came upon a spot where a number of small fiends were tormenting a holy hermit. The saintly man easily shook off their evil suggestions. The devil watched their failure, and then he stopped forward to give them a lesson. He said, 'What you do is too crude. Permit me a moment.' And with that he whispered in the holy man's ear, and he said, 'Your brother has just been made the Bishop of Alexandria.' And he said a scowl of malignant jealousy at once clouded the serene face of the hermit. 'That,' said the devil to his imps, 'is the sort of thing I should recommend.' " And the point was competition, and the realization of jealousies and envies and rivalries that go on among human beings, and you see that as a part of individuals and human beings in their struggles that they face.
Now there's lots of scriptures, like II Corinthians 10, which says not to compare yourself with others, but I think you have to come to the point that you have to finally say this: I think the man put it this way, he said, "I have never known a person in my life with whom I would like to have exchanged places. That does not mean that I have not occasionally been driven by the competitive instinct, the desire to race ahead of someone to look better or appear even more Godly if possible." He said, "But by comparison," he said, "I finally have come to realize that you have to get to the place where you say, 'I have not known a person in my life with whom I would have liked to exchange places.' " And ultimately that's where you have to go. You have to be satisfied with who and what you are. You have to come to be satisfied with who and what you are, and I think that becomes an important principle as you learn the growths and the development of a repentant frame of mind that we must have.
Number four: What rewards am I seeking? Let's go over to Matthew 19 for just a moment and see again Peter, Peter being another fine example here in Matthew 19 of the question that we have to look at. Peter had somewhat of this notion in mind when he listened to Jesus go head to head with a wealthy young inquirer who would like to have had part of Jesus band, and Jesus simply said:
Matthew 19:21 — ". . .sell (everything that you have) (sell what thou hast), give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven: come and follow me." You know the story. And the man had many riches, and he had a struggle with those riches.
Now Simon listened to the conversation. Then he approached Jesus. And notice what he says here in Matthew 19:27 —
Matthew 19:27 — He says, "Then answered Peter and said unto Him, 'Behold, we have forsaken all, and followed (thee) (you); what shall we have therefore?' " So you begin to realize that he asked the question, "What is the payoff in terms of cash, power, connection, authority, rulership, that sort of thing?" And I think there are rewards that men and women seek in a subtle way, and I think those are things that we have to look at as members of God's family. Do I want to rule in the kingdom of God because I want to rule? Or do I want to be there because I want to serve? I want to take care of the needs of another human being.
I think you find that sometimes people deny their motives only to reveal their hiddenness in a moment of loss or defeat. I think you see that happening sometimes with Christians in God's church. Sometimes from our mouth comes admissions of anger against God that He's let us down in the face of the struggle because we expected some kind of reward from Him, and in our blaming we simply do not realize that our tacit admission that we expected God to reward us with these things because we were faithful. I think we see that happening. I have had numerous people over the years ask the question, why didn't God bless me in this area or that area because I was faithful in some of the things that I have been faithful in? And sometimes you can't always answer that, but sometimes we forget that maybe we are driven by rewards. Sometimes we must ask the question, "Are we driven by rewards?"
One of my favorite jokes, of course, is the one about missing the boat. I guess you've heard that particular one. It's the story about a flood that came to an area, and the water had come up to the doorstep of the house, and a man came by with a boat, and he knocked on the door, and the man opened the door, and the man said, "You'd better get in the boat." He said, "The flood is coming."
And the man says, "No," he says, "I've prayed to God, and I've asked Him to deliver me, and I'll be just fine."
And so the man says, "Fine."
So a little bit later, the waters come up higher and higher, and finally the man had to climb out of his house and climb on the roof.
nd here comes the boat again. Here comes the boat again. And he says, "You'd better climb in; it's getting worse."
And he says, "No, God is going to deliver me." He says, "Everything is fine. Everything is fine."
And the man says, "All right." And so the third time around here the water comes up, and it gets up above the roof, and the man's sitting on the chimney. He's sitting on the chimney. And here comes the boat one more time.
And so the end result is that the man says, "Come on, you'd better get in otherwise you're going to drown."
The man says, "No." He says, "I prayed to God and He's going to take care of me. And He's promised that He's going to deliver me, so therefore," you know, "I will do that."
Well the story is the man drowns. And in the resurrection he comes up, and he is really angry with God. And he says to God, you know, "Why in the world didn't You save me? I prayed to You to save me, when I was in the house, when I was on the roof, and when I was on the chimney? Why didn't You save me?"
And God said, "Well, I sent the boat three times." And the point was that sometimes we don't realize that God does reward us in ways that we don't always understand. And sometimes people struggle against feeling that they need rewards in a certain way, and sometimes they don't always come. Sometimes they wanted to be blessed in certain ways, and that doesn't always come.
I think the prodigal son is the most interesting example. Let's go over to Luke 15 for just a moment. Luke 15:29. You know the story. We see what happened that the older brother stays home, the younger brother leaves home and becomes what I would describe as just an unmitigated rat. I mean, he was really one bad fellow, and he did things that were wrong and were evil, and he got himself into trouble, and here the older son stayed and he took care of the family business; he was faithful; he was loyal; he was the loving one, and this is clear to everyone who visits the home of this particular individual. But I think there's something below the waterline that shows that when the younger brother comes back, and he's welcomed by the father that the older brother has some interesting — under the water — experiences that finally come out under the pressure of the circumstance. The inhospitable brother takes the father aside; you know the story, and he simply says to the father, "All these years I've been slaving for you and never disobeyed your order, and yet you never gave me a young goat so that I could celebrate, and now your son who has squandered all of his inheritance and your property with prostitutes comes home, and you'll kill the fatted calf for him. Notice what Luke 15:29 says:
Luke 15:29 — He says, ". . .and he (answered) (answering) and said to his father, 'Lo, these many years do I serve you, neither transgressed I at any time (thy) (your) commandment: and yet (thou) (you) never gave me a kid, that I might make merry with my friends:
Verse 30 — "But as soon as (this thy) (your) son (was) (is) come, (which hath) (he has) devoured (thy) (his) living with harlots, (thou) (you) have killed for him the fatted calf.
Verse 31 — "And he said unto him, 'Son, (thou) (you) are ever with me, and all that I have is (thine) (yours).' " Now this is the proper retribution for the faithful, but you see, he didn't see it that way. He did not see it that way. The brother had not seen this. In a moment of anger he reveals what was festering in his soul through all these years. Is it possible that this man had been rewards-driven? I don't know, but the point is what was revealed is not very attractive. It is not very attractive, because he didn't recognize what he actually had going for him, and so we see sometimes how rewards tend to create a problem for individuals who are seeking after them, and the end result is what you see happen in the case of the prodigal son. Let's go to point number five.
Number five: We have to ask the question: What guilt or shame might I be covering that's hidden? We could use the term — hidden sins. We use the term — things that are hidden. If the innermost being of an individual is a repository of events and attitudes in the past that perhaps are grievous to a righteous God; obviously it can't be beautiful. Rather it becomes a place we say of disease, and what has been covered up may increase like cancer poisoning the soul until it's virtually destroyed. It virtually destroys a human being.
Perhaps we have come to the greatest single loss of vitality in the Christian life, the misunderstanding of the importance of repentance. Maybe this is the final point when I said to you that the goodness of God should lead you to repentance, that the growth of an individual comes over a period of time. The secrets of a human being have to be revealed. What is inside of you ultimately has to be revealed. The cover-up ultimately has to be blown away by God at some particular time in your life.
You must examine your innermost being and sometimes even submit to the examination of a trusted other individual within the spiritual community. In the ministry of Christ, we have a four point approach to working on and developing ourselves as ministers. One of those is simply your own personal evaluation. The second thing is to have what we describe as a peer evaluation. A peer evaluation. And even the Bible is very, very specific about that. Let's go to Psalm 141:5. Here we see in Psalm 141:5 the ability for us to seek from a friend a little bit of mentoring, to seek from a friend a little bit of understanding that sometimes needs to come. And you have to realize that it comes in many different ways, but in this particular case sometimes it comes from a friend. Psalm 141:5. Notice what David said:
Psalm 141:5 — He said: "Let the righteous smite me; (and) it shall be a kindness: (and) let him reprove me; (and) it shall be an excellent oil, which shall not break my head. . ." So he's talking about the fact that sometimes you need your friends, who are really true friends.
I had a good friend in college. I didn't know he was my friend at the time he did it to me, but he later became a good friend to me. It was my second year at Ambassador College, and he was sitting with me at the table, and in the middle of lunch, he looks at me, and we're talking, and we're yacking away, and he says, "Hey, Richard, how come you always talk so much about yourself?"
And I said, "What?"
And he said, "Yeah, every time we sit down to talk, you're always talking about yourself."
And I mean, the first thing was, you know, I want to grab him across the table, and I wanted to grab his Adam's apple and squeeze, you know, that type of thing. Now, he was the same size I was, so we saw eye to eye. But the second thing was, I all of a sudden realized — he's right. But I'm not going to admit that right now. And so I said, "What are you talking about?" You know, isn't that good justification? "What are you talking about?" Nice way of saying to him, "You don't know what you're talking about." And so I slammed all my things on the tray, and I got out of there as fast as I could go. And as I walked away from there, all of a sudden, I began to realize, he hit me really hard somewhere where I deserved to be hit. And that man I owe a great deal to today, because for probably a week or so, I sat and smoldered and smoked and fumed and fussed, and I finally came back, and I said to him and to God, "You're right." And it was what is a fulfillment of Psalm 141. Now it doesn't happen all the time like that, please understand. But it says that there is a breaking of the spirit of the human being to a point that God can begin to work with us. And when we look at that from the point of view, if it's your wife, if it's your husband, I have to tell you that there's nothing greater than to be able to have your mate in an honest discussion be able to show you things in a kind and a gentle way where you're wrong.
I can tell you that going from one church to another, many, many years, my wife would tell me what I did wrong in the sermon in the morning. And she was trying to help me not to make the same mistake in the afternoon. Now, I would fight with her for the first fifteen or twenty minutes, and say, "What are you talking about?" You know, the typical thing I did with my friend. But you know what? I changed it in the afternoon. I changed it in the afternoon, but we became close enough that I felt like she could smite me, and I let my armor down. Every once in a while, sometimes she'll hit me when my armor is not up, and so, it bleeds a little bit. Please understand. That does happen. But I also do the same thing with her.
Just the other day on the telephone, I said, "Honey, please don't do such and such," because we've come to that particular kind of relationship that we know some of the things that we're made of and that we need to help each other make it through. You've got a soul mate; you've got a good friend; you've got a husband or a wife, I think this is a part of the principle that we've been talking about at this particular juncture of the sermon, and that is simply not hiding, not keeping hidden, those things.
Now let's go over to Psalm 139:23, 24, just back a couple of pages. David said it beautifully. He said:
Psalm 139:23 — "Search me, O God, and know my heart:" You know, not the outward things that I have done, but my inward being, the depths of my soul. ". . .try me," he said, "and know my thoughts."
Verse 24: He said, "And see if there be any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting." Beautiful request. Jeremiah said it another way. He said simply, "I know the way of man is not in himself. It is not in man that walks to direct his steps." He said, "Therefore correct me, but with justice, lest I be brought to nothing." I think you begin to see that David, who was a practitioner of deceit on a number of occasions, that when he had this broken spirit, and when he had the ability for God to teach him, he was a man that simply opened up the doors and the windows of the subbasement. And he said, "Hey, take a good long look at me, and see, and see if there be any wicked way in me." He said, "You're the judge; you are the redeemer." I think it's very, very important that we do that all year long, year after year, as we partake of the Passover and as we renew the covenant and as we go through the year, and the Holy Spirit of God teaches us, because what I'm talking about today is ongoing repentance. It's ongoing understanding; it's ongoing growth that we have.
Let me conclude with a statement. Our friends in Alcoholics Anonymous seem to have understood the principle better than anyone else. They begin their twelve step affirmation with the words, "We admitted that we were powerless over alcohol, that our lives had become unmanageable." I think that's most interesting, although some individuals catch themselves in what I call theological criticism about some of the twelve steps, I think that this particular statement that the Alcoholics Anonymous make is a form of what I am talking about. It is a form of a frame of mind. "This is who I am," the alcoholic cries out. "I am opening my inner life, and I'm declaring my condition." That's basically what they're saying. It is one of helplessness. It is one of simply opening the doors of the archives that are simply called the depths of our being, the depths of our soul. If you will do that, and you will continue to do that in your life, you will find that God will work with, and will develop you, and will convert you in a way that you will never have understood until you have been able to break open that particular frame of mind. As we partake of the Passover this year, this is simply a matter of remembering that you and I, you and I, through this repentance year by year, are opening ourselves up for the guidance and the direction and the inspiration of God to show us why we need Jesus Christ as our Passover.