Most of my life I’ve struggled with my own self worth and feeling like I’m not good enough for anything or anyone. From close friends growing up and sometimes family, I’ve been put down a lot. I sadly took their comments to heart and believed them. I started listening to my inner critic saying things like, “I’m not good looking,” “I’m stupid,” “I’m going nowhere in life.” Sometimes I felt like I was worthless and that I had no point to live. I also felt like everybody was better than me and that they were too good for me.
In college I took a class called “on course.” It was a psychology-based class that started to change the way I thought about myself and how I looked at my life. It’s where I learned about the three voices that we all have talking in our heads: the inner defender who blames and degrades others, the inner critic who blames and degrades itself, and the inner guide who doesn’t play the blame game. The inner guide says the truth as best it can and also builds you up when you need it. The inner guide is the voice we should be listening to.
Through counseling and prayer God opened my eyes to help me see myself for who I truly am: a son of God called to be part of His family.
Even after this class I was still struggling with my own self-worth, so I started talking about my life with my pastor and also a close friend who I went to ABC with. I also took on a stronger and more heartfelt prayer life with God. Having these outlets where I could talk and get feedback helped me to deeply examine myself. I always esteemed others higher than myself, as it says to do in Philippians 2:3 Philippians 2:3Let nothing be done through strife or vainglory; but in lowliness of mind let each esteem other better than themselves.
American King James Version×—but I took that scripture’s meaning to the extreme, devaluing myself instead of appreciating the value God places on me. After doing a study on the scripture, I learned that God (through Paul) was telling us to do an inward examination of the heart, which will by default include our value in His eyes—and then to humble ourselves in service of others.
Through counseling and prayer God opened my eyes to help me see myself for who I truly am: a son of God called to be part of His family. I know I’m still not perfect, but I’m working on it. He showed me that I really do have value and a purpose in this life. God is where we get our true value from, not people or material items. God cares about all of mankind! Jesus Christ Himself told us Himself that we are of more value than the birds of the air and flowers and grass in the field (Matthew 6:26 Matthew 6:26Behold the fowls of the air: for they sow not, neither do they reap, nor gather into barns; yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much better than they?
American King James Version×).
He loved the whole world so much that He gave His only begotten son (John 3:16 John 3:16For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.
American King James Version×). Some words of advice I give to those who struggle with self worth: Take yourself out of negative situations, find someone you are comfortable with to talk to about your life, the good and the bad. And most importantly pour out your heart to God and let Him bear the burden for you. You are awesome—God knows it, and so should you!