The Decline and Fall of Civility

You are here

The Decline and Fall of Civility

Login or Create an Account

With a UCG.org account you will be able to save items to read and study later!

Sign In | Sign Up

×

If you are a person who likes labels, the year 2009 has an unfortunate but obvious moniker: The Year of the Outburst.

What's behind the increasing trend of rude public behavior?

An age of uncontrolled emotion

There have been many high-profile reports in recent months of people losing their tempers in a very public way:

  • A significant number of "Town Hall" sessions where American congressional and senatorial representatives were to hear the views of their constituents on health care reform devolved into chaos as activists disrupted the proceedings.
  • Tennis star Serena Williams exploded when a line judge called her for a foot fault during a match at the U.S. Open. She proceeded to curse and threaten the judge.
  • American rapper Kanye West literally grabbed the headlines at the MTV Video Music Awards by snatching the microphone from country singer Taylor Swift, who was in the midst of accepting an award, in order to praise runner-up artist Beyoncé.

Are you surprised by these outbursts? Sadly, you probably aren't.

Bad-mannered and disrespectful behavior such as this has been standard fare on some talk shows, sit-coms and late night segments for decades. Audiences revel in a good shouting match and laugh wildly at comedian-actors like Adam Sandler and Will Ferrell, who have literally perfected the art of the outburst.

This year, we are simply witnessing the further deterioration of a character attribute that is so crucial to our individual and collective success: self-control.

Rule your spirit

The common thread among the health care reform activists, Serena Williams, Kanye West and others was simply that things weren't going their way.

We all tend to want to exert our own will to "change the tide" when we feel that things are headed in the wrong direction. But even if the use of rude behavior helps us get what we want, does that mean we are exhibiting some kind of personal strength?

The trouble with outbursts is that they call the legitimacy of the person into question and overshadow his or her message. But here is a vastly superior approach: "He who is slow to anger is better than the mighty, and he who rules his spirit than he who takes a city" (Proverbs 16:32).

The surprising measure of true strength

Humanly, we tend to think of strength as external. We try to exercise strength over circumstances, events and other people. But truly, real strength is to have control over the things inside us.

The French Renaissance philosopher Michel de Montaigne said it well: "Not being able to govern events, I govern myself."

Ruling over our own selves is more difficult and requires a much greater depth of character than controlling things outside us. That' where true strength of characters lies.

History is littered with a long string of men and women who might have been truly great, but they lacked self-control. Those uncontrolled emotions made them ineffective at best, and destroyed them at worst.

Be a vertical thinker! Avoid the current trend of emotional outbursts. Instead, invest that emotional energy in learning and practicing the truly useful character trait of self-control.

For help with developing this vital characteristic, see the article "Self-Control: Governing Your Life by the Power of God." VT