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Breaking Free Website Offers Hope and Help

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Breaking Free Website Offers Hope and Help

Here is the first verse of a classic hit song of the 70s—“I Can Help” by Billy Swan:

If you’ve got a problem, I don’t care what it is

If you need a hand, I can assure you this

I can help, I’ve got two strong arms, I can help

It would sure do me good to do you good,

Let me help.

Indeed, Jesus said, “There is more happiness in giving than in receiving” (Acts 20:35, Good News Bible). It does us good to do good!

The purpose of this article is not to give a lot of practical advice. It is to create awareness of Breaking Free, make its purposes clear, encourage our members to read the articles there so they will be prepared to understand and help others, and, most importantly, to show from the Bible how we are called to follow Jesus Christ’s example of love, mercy, compassion and practical help toward everyone.

Those willing to write have an additional opportunity to serve. You can write an article in which you share your knowledge and experience with the readers. Once you are familiar with Breaking Free, you will see the types of articles that we are seeking. (Articles are accepted only from members and ministers of United Church of God.)

Breaking Free continues to expand in the types of problems it addresses. The many articles are arranged under the following “topics”: addictions, alcoholism, abuse (physical, mental, sexual), eating disorders, emotional stresses, gambling, homosexuality and same-sex attraction, mental disorders, sexual addictions, smoking and substance abuse.

The meaning of the word “addiction” is somewhat ambiguous. A distinction is often made between physiological and psychological addiction. Physiological addiction is a biological and pathological dependence on a chemical substance—in which unhealthy (and often permanent) chemical changes take place in the brain and body. Generally speaking, psychological addiction is a strong (sometimes powerful!) habit or compulsion—an emotional dependence and craving for something and its effects. Some psychological addictions can lead to a physiological addiction and vice versa.

Physiological addictions include alcoholism, addictions to drugs (both legal and illegal drugs) and addiction to nicotine (smoking).

People have psychological addictions to countless things: abuse of all kinds, eating disorders, sexual sins (pornography being number one), entertainment (TV, video games, etc.), profanity, gambling, violence, self-mutilation, shopping (“shopaholics”), obsessive-compulsive behavior, stealing (kleptomania), etc., etc.

For the rest of this article, the words “addicts” and “addictions” refer to any and all major personal problems.

Addicts often feel helpless, hopeless and worthless

People who have an addiction or a destructive habit usually feel very guilty, ashamed, stigmatized, humiliated and unworthy. After a while, many even feel worthless and unlovable and “no good.”

This can be true even of people who have been upstanding citizens of high moral character. Many different kinds of circumstances and mistakes lead to addictions. For example, there are many more addictions to legal drugs than illegal drugs. A commentary titled “Addictions to Prescription Painkillers Are Epidemic” was recently posted at www.ucg.org.

Because of the shame and feelings of failure, those with addictions urgently need two things. They need to understand the incredible love that God has for them. And they need to experience godly love flowing to them from at least one human being (many people is much better, of course!). First, let’s focus on God’s incredible love.

God’s love and Satan’s hatred for humanity

God, our Creator, loves everyone and desires to save everyone (John 3:16; 1 Timothy 2:4). Paul wrote, “God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us” [to pay the penalty for our sins] (Romans 5:8). This means every single person on earth is valuable to God.

Part of the reason Christ came to earth was to demonstrate His infinite love. His ministry was a labor of love, showing interest in and kindness to all types of people—men, women and children, all races, those labeled as “sinners” and those considered the “untouchables” like lepers. He was regularly “healing all kinds of sickness and all kinds of disease among the people” (Matthew 4:23). He despised and disproved the popular idea that people who are sick or injured are being cursed by God.

Mankind’s archenemy is Satan the Devil (Revelation 12:9). Satan uses all his “devices” and “wiles” to tempt and ensnare us (2 Corinthians 2:11; Ephesians 6:11). He despises people and wants to destroy them in any way he possibly can—physically, mentally and spiritually.

Jesus said: “The thief [Satan] does not come except to steal, and to kill, and to destroy. I have come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly. I am the good shepherd. The good shepherd gives His life for the sheep” (John 10:10-11).

After one fully commits his life to obeying and serving God, God provides a huge amount of protection and help. But even after that, the spiritual warfare doesn’t end. Romans 7:14-25 describes how even the apostle Paul continually struggled against the temptations to sin. Satan is determined to lure us into an addiction or destructive habit, and then into discouragement and depression. But God has promised, “I will never leave you nor forsake you” (Deuteronomy 31:6, 8; Hebrews 13:5). People often forsake God, but if afterwards they deeply repent, God will welcome them back as illustrated by the parable of the prodigal son (Luke 15:10-32).

Seeing God’s love is more convincing than merely hearing about God’s love

Addicts are often told, “Quit feeling unloved and hopeless. Don’t you know that God loves you?” That by itself is like saying, “be warmed and filled” (James 2:15-16). “Faith without works is dead” (verse 20), and love without works also seems dead.

It usually doesn’t do much good to tell an addict that God loves him if nobody else is expressing love. The addict thinks, at least subconsciously: “Since no one else loves me, I can’t believe God loves me. If Jesus’ representatives don’t love me, why should I believe that Jesus loves me?”

Addicts often suffer a vicious cycle. Consider the example of someone addicted to a drug. When others find out about it, they often become judgmental and angry, give simplistic advice, and soon shun the addict. (Even loved ones soon feel overwhelmed when they realize how complex and intractable addictions are.) Because the addict feels rejected, he turns to the drug for relief and escape—he “medicates” his mental pain. And so it goes.

Friends and family are often anxious to “fix” their loved one. Advice is often simplistic (like, “Just stop it! Just do it!”). Even when the addict desires to get clean, he feels it is impossible. Even when “the spirit [mind] is willing…the flesh is weak” (Mark 14:38).

There is no quick or easy fix for an addiction. And all of us should be very cautious about giving advice lest we do more harm than good.The advice we should give is to encourage the person to get expert advice, counseling, treatment and support.

Being a light to others doesn’t mean to blind them! What family and friends should provide is not an avalanche of advice and exhortation, but ongoing love, respect, encouragement and practical assistance. “People do not care how much you know until they know how much you care.” Show that you are a true friend who can be trusted.

We must also remember this: True love is the right combination of soft love and tough love.

The soft side of love is being a good listener, speaking encouraging words and doing kind deeds. We must “put on tender mercies, kindness, humility, meekness, longsuffering; bearing with one another, and forgiving one another” (Colossians 3:12-13). Even though we haven’t been in the sufferer’s shoes, we must seek God’s help to have compassion and empathy. Although we hate the addiction, we make it clear that we love the addict.

The tough side of love is being honest and firm, not condoning or being an enabler of any wrongdoing, not engaging in denial, not becoming codependent or becoming associated with any illegal activity. Tough love establishes rules and consequences for the home and the relationship. Tough love teaches others how to be tough so they can survive life’s tribulations and emerge a better person. With tough love, we steer others to the best sources of knowledge, counseling and support.

You probably have heard the saying, “Laugh and the world laughs with you, weep and you weep alone.” We feel like avoiding people who are depressed or who have long-lasting problems. Love is work, and we get tired. But true love is “patient” and true love “never comes to an end” (1 Corinthians 13:4, 8, God’s Word). Romans 12:15 plainly says, “Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep.”

One caring person can make all the difference in the world to someone who is hurting. Caring people count.

More priceless scriptures to keep in mind

1 Corinthians 12:26—“And if one member suffers, all the members suffer with it; or if one member is honored, all the members rejoice with it.”

1 Corinthians 9:22—“To the weak I became as weak, that I might win the weak. I have become all things to all men, that I might by all means save some.”

Galatians 6:1-2—“Brethren, if a man is overtaken in any trespass, you who are spiritual restore such a one in a spirit of gentleness, considering yourself lest you also be tempted. Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.”

Philippians 2:3-4—“Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself. Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others.

Isaiah 58:6—“Is this not the fast that I have chosen: To loose the bonds of wickedness, to undo the heavy burdens, to let the oppressed go free, and that you break every yoke?”

Jesus Christ, our perfect Role Model

Jesus was the perfect example of a self-sacrificing Savior, Healer, Comforter, Friend and Brother. Jesus spent a huge percentage of His time healing people of all sorts of maladies. The gospel writers mention that He was “moved with compassion” (Matthew 14:14). He touched the untouchables. He loved those who were considered unlovable. He healed bodies, minds and hearts.

Infirmities are often partly the result of the physical consequences of past mistakes, sometimes even sins. So it’s fascinating that when people asked Jesus for healing, we never read that He shamed them or even lectured them about what they should’ve done. When Jesus knew that sins had been committed, He merely said, “Sin no more” (John 5:14; 8:11).

Luke 4:18, quoting Isaiah 61:1, sums up much of Christ’s commission: “The Spirit of the Lord is upon Me, because He has anointed Me to preach the gospel to the poor; He has sent Me to heal the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives and recovery of sight to the blind, to set at liberty those who are oppressed.”

As Jesus’ disciples, our mission should be to help fulfill that commission. Everyone has a cross to bear (Luke 14:27). But each of us can help “bear one another’s burdens.”

Jesus said, “Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light” (Matthew 11:28-30).

As Jesus’ disciples, we have that wonderful example to imitate!

The powerful parable of Matthew 25:31-46 is both sobering and inspiring.

In Matthew 25:35-36, Jesus said, “For I was hungry and you gave Me food; I was thirsty and you gave Me drink; I was a stranger and you took Me in; I was naked and you clothed Me; I was sick and you visited Me; I was in prison [or a rehab center] and you came to Me.”

Later (verse 40), Jesus said, “Assuredly, I say to you, inasmuch as you did it to one of the least of these My brethren, you did it to Me.” And by “My brethren,” I don’t think He meant only converted Church brethren.

One whom we might view as “one of the least of these My brethren” can be someone addicted to cocaine or a prescription painkiller. Or alcohol. Or gambling. Or overeating. Or pornography. Or one who is tempted with same-sex attraction.

What an exciting opportunity we have—to serve Christ by serving His children, especially when those children seriously need help! Isn’t this awesome?!

Please see the sidebar, “History of Breaking Free Journal.” And we hope you will read many of the articles on http://breakingfree.ucg.org. When you go to the Homepage, you can learn the purposes of BF.To learn more, click on About. Click on Topicsand you will see the articles that are filed under each topic.

And as the song says, let’s remember: I can help. Let me help.