Winning With Your Strengths

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Jake had always wanted to play college basketball. But he soon discovered that "there were better ball players selling popcorn and Cokes in the stands than some of us down on the basketball court. Once I figured that out, I readjusted the focus on my future."

Meet Jake. In 1956, at age 18, he excelled in high-school basketball. He averaged 30 points a game during his last two years of high school and was recruited by large and small universities. Jake was unusual in that he was only 6 feet tall but played center on his team. Fans got excited watching him play because he showed good timing, was quick, often outwitted his taller opponents and possessed an accurate soft jump shot.

He stood out in high-school basketball, but in college he found himself outclassed. College freshmen trying out for the teams needed height and superior ball handling. Jake soon rethought his future in athletics. He loved the game, but he couldn't realize his dream of playing college basketball, so what could he do? He did the smart thing and studied to become a basketball coach. Jake focused on something he could excel at, and success followed him. There is more to Jake's story.

Well-meaning advisers

No matter who or what you are, somebody will be quick to advise you on your life's choices. Some unsolicited advice may be helpful, but much will not. A well-meaning mother wants her daughter to do what she never could. The well-meaning father expects his son to take over the family business. Sometimes daughters and sons do follow in their mothers' and fathers' footsteps and are perfectly happy and successful. But this is not always the case.

Advice is cheap, and it flows freely from family and friends. Some people have spent years following a particular professional path but wish they could start all over again down a different one. Does it do any good to regret the paths not taken, the opportunities lost? Not according to writers Carole Klein and Richard Gotti: "Regret, which is inextricably linked to choice, has become a major malady of modern life. The more options there are to choose from, the more options we must relinquish at the moment of choice. As we choose more, we give up more, and create more 'might have beens' " (Carole Klein and Richard Gotti, Ph.D., Overcoming Regret: Lessons From the Roads Not Taken, 1992, p. 10).

The Gottis quote French novelist and Nobel Prize winner Andre Gide, who advises: "It is a rule of life that when one door closes, another door always opens. Let us not, therefore, mourn so much for the losses behind the closed door that we miss the opportunities waiting for us beyond the newly opened door" (ibid., p. 9). Not all of life's opportunities are stored behind door No. 1. Although people tend to nurse regrets over jobs they should have taken, you shouldn't be quick to change occupation, vocation or profession. Age, health, the economy, personal solvency, family and other important factors can weigh heavily in your decision to make such a significant change. Counselors advise seeking professional advice and talking with people who have found themselves in similar situations.

Many people who have caught the job-changing bug will not be deterred by sound advice. If you are one who is determined to embark on a new profession based on your native talents and abilities, you can profit from some time-tested guidelines. Following are some suggestions that can help.

This brief listing is not a one-size-fits-all panacea. Rather, think of these tips as food for thought.

What natural talent?

At Gallup, Inc., pollsters studied 250,000 successful professionals. They determined "that the highest levels of achievement come when people are matched with activities that use their strengths" (Donald O. Clifton and Paula Nelson, Soar With Your Strengths, 1992, p. 21). Many people decide they want to do something enjoyable for a living. But sometimes that's easier said than done.

Sometimes a person's desire does not match his or her ability. In those cases, a lifetime can be misspent struggling to seek satisfying success. Brian Tracy, who conducts seminars on identifying strengths, advises: "You can't hit a target you can't see. You can't accomplish wonderful things with your life if you have no idea what they are. You must first become absolutely clear about what you want" (Brian Tracy, Maximum Achievement, 1993, p. 21). Some people do hone in on their target. They determine the tasks that come most naturally to them. They succeed in their newly chosen field. Determination, outside help and perseverance, along with happenstance, can make the difference when people match their life's pursuit with their natural abilities. Daytime television shows occasionally air such success stories, and it's exciting to see rags transform into riches when ability and activity match up.

Former test pilot and United States Air Force general Chuck Yeager offers this advice about matching ability with a career: "...Pick something you enjoy doing. Forget the money angle, within reason. If you enjoy what you're doing, you'll adjust your lifestyle to meet your income. And if you enjoy it well enough, you'll be outstanding because you'll always like doing it" (Dennis Conner, The Art of Winning, 1989, p. 178).

Jake's example, of a short guy who loved basketball, supports Chuck Yeager's advice. In his first year of college, after realizing he might not excel in his chosen sport, he discovered he could apply his natural ability to a related field: coaching - rather than playin - basketball. Jake didn't complain that life wasn't fair. He took hold of other possibilities and prepared himself to succeed. His second-chosen field gave him more opportunities for his natural talents to grow.

Focus on your deepest desire

Things change. Forty years ago a farmer, rancher or laborer made many of his own repairs. My father raised cattle and wheat, built his own house and repaired his farm equipment himself. He also supervised and maintained oil wells, keeping the pumps and motors in good working order.

But Dad also owned a shoe-repair business. He simply couldn't make a living on the farm. So my father, out of necessity, became a jack-of-all-trades and master of one. He knew enough about mechanics, plumbing and carpentry to get by on the farm, but he was a professional when it came to repairing shoes.

Jake also focused on what he did best. He wasn't a genius, yet he concentrated on being the best coach and teacher he could be. Twenty years later his peers designated him a master teacher and inducted him into his state's teachers' hall of fame.

Daily commitment

The story goes that a young man interested in music was looking for Carnegie Hall in New York City. "Excuse me, sir," he inquired of an elderly gentleman on the street. "Would you be so kind as to tell me how I might get to Carnegie Hall?"

"Certainly, young man," responded the older man. "Practice, practice, practice!"

Consider Dennis Conner's perspective for winning in life. It was he who piloted the Stars and Stripes, which won back the 1987 America's Cup yachting-race title from the plucky Australians. In Conner's book The Art of Winning, he writes about "the 'commitment to the commitment.' I call it 'thinking big.' It means setting your sights on a goal that may seem unattainable, and achieving it" (Conner, p. ix).

Mr. Conner himself revealed his commitment in preparing for that incredible race in 1987: "Here's what it's like: You wake up every morning knowing that you must accomplish more than can possibly be done in the next twenty-four hours--more than you have ever done any other day of your life. You practice, and practice some more--always looking for a better way, always pushing at the limits of the possible. By the day of the first race, you know you have done everything you possibly can to prepare. You have taken away every possible excuse to lose" (Conner, page xv).

Managing your weaknesses

Michael O'Brien authored Vince, a biography of a professional American football coach, Vince Lombardi. Mr. O'Brien wrote of Mr. Lombardi's attempt to instill confidence in his team, the Green Bay Packers. Preparing his team to defeat its archrival, the Detroit Lions, Mr.Lombardi showed films that focused only on successful running plays previously used against the Lions. His idea was that if his team concentrated on strengths rather than weaknesses, it had a much better chance of entering the coming game with confidence.

Although Vince Lombardi was considered a taskmaster of a coach, he understood how the mind works. He focused his team on its successes and didn't worry about its failures.

You can manage your weaknesses. Of course, some weaknesses should be overcome, not just managed. A weakness for shoplifting is different from a weakness for chocolate pastries. If you can't seem to get to work on time, you had better overcome that weakness or you may lose your job. If your problem is drug or alcohol abuse, you had better overcome your addiction, or your problem will overcome you.

But some weaknesses can be managed. A television writer had great difficulty because of dyslexia, which caused him to transpose letters and numbers. He did not attempt to overcome this debility. Rather, he hired an assistant to correct his writing, making each script appear as professional as its content. He found a way to manage one of his human weaknesses.

God focuses on your strengths

Accentuating the positive - building on your strengths - is not just good business advice. It is also supported by the Bible. King Solomon admonished people to concentrate on their strengths: "Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with your might; for there is no work or device or knowledge or wisdom in the grave where you are going" (Ecclesiastes 9:10). Proverbs 13:19 tells us, "A desire accomplished is sweet to the soul."

Pinpointing and emphasizing your natural strengths and abilities are important, but an even greater principle, one with a spiritual aspect, comes into play. As a Christian, you must "seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble" (Matthew 6:33, 34).

Seek God first. All other physical desires and needs can be met one day at a time. Although they may be important, they are secondary to seeking God's Kingdom.

Jesus Christ set us an example of prayer in the Gospel of Luke. That prayer directs our attention to the importance of receiving daily our physical and spiritual food: "Give us day by day our daily bread" (Luke 11:3).

The apostle Paul supports the day-by-day commitment to life's needs: "Therefore we do not lose heart. Even though our outward man is perishing, yet the inward man is being renewed day by day" (2 Corinthians 4:16).The focus here and throughout Scripture is on a Christian's daily commitment.

Finally, Scripture supports the effective management of weaknesses. Paul encourages: "[This] one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead" (Philippians 3:13). Paul had to live with the unpleasant memory of his persecution of God's saints. It would not have been hard for Paul to succumb to regret rather than positively offering his life as a profitable servant to others. God enjoys seeing humans succeed. Consider Job's example, cited by the apostle James: "Indeed we count them blessed who endure. You have heard of the perseverance of Job and seen the end intended by the Lord" (James 5:11). Anyone who frequently reads the book of Job notices the self-righteousness of Job. Yet, when God inspired James's use of Job as an example, James focused on only one aspect of Job's character: his perseverance. God could have inspired James to enumerate Job's shortcomings, but He didn't. God stresses Job's patience. God lovingly and optimistically looks to our strengths, not our weaknesses (Romans 8:31-33).

In this mortal life, you may have the tendency to live the dreams of others. Longing for what might have been can drain and damage. Besides, it is usually difficult to point to a single decision that set your life on the course you wish you could change. Your life is a composite of innumerable factors, some you could have altered, others you could have done nothing about.

Regardless, you should always seek wise counsel, especially before making a watershed decision affecting the direction of a vocation or avocation.

Whatever you decide, remember the importance of obeying God. Paul addresses this truth: "Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with [by doing] good" (Romans 12:21). God doesn't say focus on evil by attacking it directly. The best way to overcome sin is by doing good for others. Where good exists, evil vanishes.

Decided to fight

Jake's positive example was enhanced by his ability to manage his weaknesses. Jake was an avid and locally renowned golfer, even though his body was racked with pain because of Hodgkin's disease. When Jake was 20 years old, his physician told him he should get his house in order because he would probably die in six months. Jake had a young wife. He had dreams. His future lay ahead of him, and he was anxious to share his life with others in his chosen profession. He decided he would not give up and die; he would fight for his life, marriage and hoped-for family.

And fight he did. In the 26 years of pain that followed, leading to his death at age 46, Jake accomplished much. Although he became addicted to prescribed drugs that he took for relief from his chronic pain, he managed his weaknesses so he could present free seminars to young people about the dangers of taking drugs.

Four times he went cold turkey off drugs. "Those were terrible times," he said. But he was committed to his goal in life, striving to share his life with young people. He fought the pain, often averaging two hours of sleep per night so he could continue teaching.

In his last years, a doctor inadvertently gave him too much chemotherapy, weakening his heart and adding stress to his already weak body. Still, he never gave up.

One evening I found Jake driving golf balls in a park. He told me he was hitting about 300 balls every evening as part of his physical therapy, and hitting all those golf balls had sharpened his game. It was at once shocking and inspirational to watch him press a golf ball and tee in the ground, then take hold of his thin legs with his arms and hands and position his legs so he could drive the ball straight down an imaginary fairway.

Before he died, Jake's physicians discovered a tumor growing around his spine that, when removed, forced him to dramatically adjust his walk by learning to swing his hips and legs so he could move forward. Seeing this once agile athlete reduced to near-immobilization was heartrending, to say the least. But he could still drive with unerring accuracy time after time. I marveled at his attitude, his singleness of purpose, his relentless determination while experiencing great discomfort, and I admired his deep desire to manage his weaknesses. He was a remarkable success in a short life. Jake occasionally remarked that it wasn't life that created his outgoing perspective; it was the prospect of death.

Jake had weaknesses, most of them brought on by his physical frailties, but he focused on his strengths. His example was both common and extraordinary. It was common because Jake was an ordinary person like you and me. It was out of the ordinary because Jake showed profound courage in the face of daily pain and the prospects of an early grave. Jake learned to live one day at a time because he knew the next day might be his last. Perhaps his greatest strength was that he recognized and accepted his natural talents and therefore proved an outstanding success.

You can win with your strengths, as did my brother Jake.