Becoming Godly, Masculine Men

What comes to mind when you think of a man—a true man? Do you instantly think of a bumbling, effeminate incapable fool? Or maybe you picture a gunslinging cowboy, ruthless and powerful?

Believe it or not, neither of the examples given above depicts godly, masculine men.

Mankind is at the center of the plan of God, as He has called man to become a part of His family! Men and women both play unique and special roles in this incredible calling. This family has a structure (Genesis 2:24), and from Ephesians 5:22-24, we can see that men are to lead and care for their families, just as Christ does the Church.

Because of this, Satan has done all he can to destroy the family structure God set up at creation, including attacking the man’s role and true masculinity. Too often in the world’s current society, masculinity is viewed as being submissive, weak and overly-emotional, or manipulative, evil and predatory.

With many families missing a father, children often lack proper examples of God’s definition of “masculinity.” On the other hand, some families do have a father figure, but one who shirks his God-given responsibilities and doesn’t fulfill his biblical role the way God intended. Men, just like women and children, have a special part to play in God’s plan. Men—we need to be living up to that responsibility! How can we be godly, masculine men? What does that even mean? How does God expect Christian men to act? How does God view real masculinity?

First of all, we have to understand that to reach our full potential as men, we have to build and maintain a strong relationship with God. Proverbs 20:7 says, “The righteous man walks in his integrity; his children are blessed after him.” Following God and adhering strictly to the examples we see of godly men will provide a rock-solid foundation for the masculinity God expects to see from us. Once we’ve firmly established our relationship with God, we should be able to see other secondary, traits of godly masculinity start to take shape in our life.

One mark of a masculine Christian is that he keeps good company. In Proverbs 13:20 it says, “He who walks with wise men will be wise, but the companion of fools will be destroyed.” In Proverbs 27:17 we read, “As iron sharpens iron, so a man sharpens the countenance of his friend.” We’re supposed to surround ourselves with edifying company and uplifting friends, and every day help build each other up. The Bible is full of verses about friends, reinforcing again and again the importance of a support group to lift up and edify (1 Thessalonians 5:11).

Next, godly, masculine men know to take care of their body. Paul speaks to this in 1 Corinthians 6:19-20 where he says, “Or do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit [which] is in you, [which] you have from God, and you are not your own? For you were bought at a price; therefore glorify God in your body and in your spirit, which are God’s.” In fact, you may recall Daniel and his friends (most likely older teens or young men) refusing to eat unclean, unhealthy food, and instead asking for healthy food and water. They understood the importance of taking care of themselves, especially at a young age (Daniel 1:5-16). Our bodies are intricately and masterfully designed by God (Psalm 139:14).

Proverbs 20:29 says, “The glory of young men is their strength . . .” In the New Testament we have the example of Jesus Christ, who worked as a carpenter (Mark 6:3). This is a physical trade, and would have required that Jesus be fit—moving timbers and stones all the time. Unfortunately, in the present day, debilitating illnesses or injuries have become more and more prevalent. These are just another tactic Satan has to discourage and hinder us, so we need to understand the importance of maintaining, to the best of our abilities, the incredible systems God built into our bodies, that are such a testament to His craftsmanship and power.

A godly, masculine man is, perhaps surprisingly, emotional. This is another misconception about men. Men should be emotional, yet be in control of their emotions at the same time. In Ecclesiastes 3:4-5, Solomon points out that there is “a time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance; a time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing.” Demonstrating self-control—especially of our emotions—is actually the result of a godly man allowing himself to be led by God’s Spirit (Galatians 5:22-23)! However, showing emotion is appropriate in some situations, and it’s important to strike a good balance in our lives.

There are many places where we find Jesus showing emotion. One of these is in Matthew 21:12-13. Jesus was forgiving in many cases, but in this instance, He was furious at the desecration of God’s house, and He acted in righteous anger. God created us with emotions, but what determines whether or not we are godly, masculine men is how we control our emotions and use them.

A godly, masculine man is a respectful leader. Men were designed to be the head of the family, but that comes with responsibility. Once we’re in that position, we must lead in a godly way. This includes respecting everyone, whether fellow man, woman or child. We’re to be the main example for our family and we need to live up to this responsibility. In Luke 6:31, Jesus said: “And just as you want men to do to you, you also do to them likewise.” Paul built on that in Philippians 2:3, saying: “Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself.” We lead through humility and service. Being masculine means you aren’t lazy, effeminate or wimpy, but it’s also not about seeing how small you can make others around you feel. A godly, masculine man serves, leads by example and respects everyone.

Finally, a godly, masculine man is always looking to improve. No matter how reverent, fit, in control of our emotions or respectful we are, we cannot be perfect. We need to always exercise humility and look to do better. Paul reminded the Church of God in Phillipi of the importance of this in Philippians 3:12-14, when he wrote, “Not that I have already attained, or am already perfected; but I press on, that I may lay hold of that for which Christ Jesus has also laid hold of me. Brethren, I do not count myself to have apprehended; but one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead, I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.”

In a world where Satan continues to twist and pervert mankind’s perspective—especially in view of and against men—we need to remember that we define ourselves by the standards in God’s Word, not by the standards of society. With the foundation of a strong relationship with God, we should be able to exhibit important traits of godly, masculine men, such as taking care of our bodies and minds, leading by example in a godly fashion, keeping good company, and understanding that there are always more steps we can take on the path to maturity and perfection as sons of God.

David Terry