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Agape Love: Part 5

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Agape Love

Part 5

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Agape Love: Part 5

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Gary Petty's 8 part sermon series defining the very righteousness of God that we are to attain.

Transcript

Listen to 2010 version of the 8 part Agape Love sermon series:
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4
Part 5
Part 6
Part 7
Part 8

[Gary Petty] When Jesus came preaching the Gospel of the Kingdom of God, it wasn't just a set of beliefs about the Gospel of the Kingdom of God. He said you must become converted into the kingdom of God. Conversion, of course, is a process. We've talked about that many times. You can convert water into steam. But you just can't put water and sit it in a pan and sit it on a stove and say, turn, you know, become steam. It becomes steam because of a process that changes it from one thing into another. You can take water and turn it into ice. But it is a process to do that. Conversion is a process.

We talk about this process, this conversion process. The first thing that comes to mind, of course, is when people discover the truth. Discover the Ten Commandments. Walk away from the Catholic Church. Begin to keep the Sabbath. Understand the holy days. Begin to understand that when you die you don't go to heaven or hell. Begin to understand that the clean and unclean meat laws still apply. And begin to understand all these elements of what we know is the truth. We've been looking at the Bible in a totally different way. For many people, they begin to read the Bible for the first time in their lives. And of course, we begin to understand that salvation comes through Jesus Christ, and we need that sacrifice for us. And we go through the repentance process, and crying out to be converted. You know, when you're baptized, you're asking to be converted. I did a baptism this week and explained the person, through the baptism counseling, how that person is going to now be converted. In fact, it was Carrie Thompson. Many of you know her because she attends a lot of the sporting events, David Thompson's wife. So she was baptized this week. And she and I spent many hours over the last three, four, five weeks discussing the whole conversion process.

But conversion isn't just changing to a set of ideas, a set of beliefs. That's part of it, you must go through that, we all must go through that, but it is at its core a change of nature. We take our damaged, corrupt human nature. And according to what Peter said in 2 Peter, we become partakers of the divine nature. So we say, okay, now I must become a partaker of the divine nature. And we struggle with this. What does it mean to become a partaker of the divine nature? Well, when you were baptized and hands were laid on you, you received the divine nature. But we must now conform to that, we must be converted into the divine nature. And that's what we've been talking about for the last...over a month now, as we've been going through. This is part five of the qualities of agape.

In fact, I told Kim last week, I said, driving home from last week after services, I was so frustrated. Because I felt like I had so much material I wanted to cover in the sermon, that I ended up covering so much, I covered nothing. There was just so much in my brain and so much notes, I couldn't get it all out. And it was very frustrating for me because that should have been two sermons. Because we never even...the "Doesn't seek its own," we just scratch that one, just the surface of that. We begin to realize this is what we must be converted to. This is the character we must have.

So let's go to 1 Corinthians 13 and let's look at the next quality on the list. Because in your life, every trial we have is an opportunity to learn one of these qualities. Every problem we have, everything we face, is an opportunity to learn one of these qualities or a multiple number of these qualities. As I've been saying, as we go through each one, you see how they're unique and yet connected. The qualities began, of course, in verse 4. Agape, not love as we know it in English. The word literally means the character of God. Agape suffers long, it is kind, does not envy, does not parade itself, is not puffed up, does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked. Is not provoked. So now we have to stop and say, what does that mean?

Does that mean a Christian can never experience anger? What does that mean, "is not provoked?" As we've been going through these ideas like suffering long and kindness and envy, pride, rudeness, we understand that it's all tied with emotions. These are thoughts and actions that are tied to emotions. We must understand that not only must our actions be changed, our thoughts be changed, but we must learn to control our emotions in this context of agape. So when we talk about, "Is not provoked," we begin to understand that agape also has to deal with anger. What makes us angry? Why do we become angry? What do we do when we are angry? I mean, "is not provoked," can't mean, never experiences anger, and I'll show you why I mean that in a minute. So what does that mean? What must I become in order to be converted so that I can learn to control my anger?

All anger is not wrong. Now, we have to start with an understanding. Anger is a human reaction. There are times when you couldn't stop anger happening in you. I mean, it would be as hard as stopping breathing. It is a human reaction. And there are times it's almost spontaneous, and there's a reason for that. All anger is not destructive. In fact, remember in Ephesians 4:26 the Apostle Paul says, "Be angry and sin not." In other words, it's possible to be angry, but don't sin. Anger leads us to sin. We've all committed a lot of sin in our lives. We've all done actions that weren't kind, that were rude, that didn't fit the other qualities of agape because of anger. Anger motivates us to break all kinds of qualities of agape. So we have to say, okay, how can I be angry and sin not?

Now, anger can't be all wrong because God is angry, and sometimes His anger is expressed...and I don't want to say His anger motivates Him. God is motivated by something different than anger. That's the whole thing about agape. His anger is expressed in a certain way. He is not motivated by His anger. You say, "Well, isn't that the same thing?" That's a world of difference. He is motivated by what's good. He is motivated by what is good. Remember what we said agape is. Agape is always doing what is best for the other person. So His anger doesn't motivate Him. If it did, we'd be in real trouble. Because if you were having a bad day and was in a real rebellious attitude towards God, what would He do if He was having a bad day and He was motivated by anger? God deosn't have bad days, and He's not motivated by anger, but His anger is expressed in certain ways.

Look at Psalm chapter 7. Psalm chapter 7. He's always going to do what's best. His anger is always based on right and wrong. It's always based on what is just and it's always based on what is good. And fortunately, God's anger is many times expressed in mercy. You say, what's that mean? How many times... God is angry with the world and yet he sacrificed his own son for the world? See, His anger isn't a motivation. It is an experience of Him as a being. It is not His motivation. And there's where you and I hover. Anger is a motivation for us. It drives us to do things. Now, God isn't chemical. So, you know, when He talks about His anger, I can't relate that exactly to what... I don't know how it's experienced. And now our anger is experienced. Jesus Christ does too. Because Jesus Christ walked this earth as a human being, wired, like we are. So He understands. So he says, is not provoked. In other words, Anger doesn't drive us, can't motivate us to do the wrong thing. It doesn't say, you don't be angry. It says you're not provoked. You're not driven by anger to do the wrong thing. We've all been there. Agape is a different motivation.

Look what it says here in Psalm 7:11. "God is a just judge, and God is angry with the wicked every day." Now, if God is a just judge and He's angry with the wicked every day, why isn't God wiping humanity off the face of the earth? Because God is not motivated that way by His anger. It didn't say God is an angry God and He judges the wicked every day. It said, He is a just judge and He's angry with the wicked. The first statement is His justice. It's actually God's sense of justice that doesn't destroy humanity. It's His love. It's those things combined together. I know this sounds like a complicated concept, but I really want to make it understandable. We must understand God experiences anger. That anger is expressed in action. It is never motivated by anger. God did not destroy Sodom and Gomorrah simply because He was angry with them. God destroyed Sodom and Gomorrah because they were sinners, you understand? Did He experience anger? Yep. But that's not what motivated Him. You and I have a hard time separating that process in our own brain. Part of it's not just because of the spiritual principle involved, the brain itself. It's very difficult for us to separate between being angry and being motivated by anger. God doesn't have that problem. And the result is that much of the anger that we experience does not produce what God once produced.

Proverbs chapter 29. Proverbs 29: 22. "An angry man stirs up strife." So of course, we all know angry people. And it's like, once again, we all experience anger, but this is an angry man. Now there was this person just anger all the time. You know, you've met somebody at work, you have a relative or somebody like that. They're just angry all the time. And so what happens? Every place they go, they're in an argument. Every place they go, they're in strife. They never have peace. But it also says, "And a furious man abounds in transgressions." Anger will motivate us to sin if we're not careful. Anger will motivate us to sin if we're not careful. So we have to be very...we have to understand the power of anger and why agape is not provoked. Doesn't say agape never gets angry, it's not provoked. You know, when we provoke somebody, we're driving them to action. Or when we're provoked, you know, I was provoked to hit him? We're not provoked, we're not driven by our anger. We're not driven by our anger.

James 1. We're going to go through a lot of scriptures today. I told a lot of stories last two weeks, and we've got a lot of scriptures today. James 1:19. New Testament basic statement of what we just read in the Old Testament. James says in James 1:19, "So then, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath, for the wrath of man does not produce the righteousness of God." So we have to understand this. He says it. Human anger does not produce the righteousness of God. Yet how many times in life are we motivated by anger?

I can remember one time when Kim and I first got married. She was upset over something and she got mad. Because she was mad, I got mad. And I got on the phone and chewed some guy out over a credit card snafu, hung up the phone and thought, "Why did I just do that?" She was mad. Now, she had the right to be mad. I didn't care. I say she was angry. My wife doesn't get angry that much, but it stirred me up. Okay, the point is, her being upset...maybe this is where...she got upset, I got mad. I called the guy and on the phone punched him in the nose, hung up, and then thought, "Why did I do that? I don't even know that guy. He's not even the guy that runs the credit card company. He's some flunky sitting on the, on there, you know, probably taking some kind of antacid all day long because people like me call him up and chew him out." And then I started thinking, what purpose did that have? It's not the anger. It's not being provoked. It's not being driven by that anger that's the issue. It's not wrong to even show anger from time to time, or express anger from time to time. It's what we do with it that's the issue, so that we're not provoked by anger, we're not motivated by anger.

You know, one man I think about in the Bible that had some trouble with his anger was Moses. I mean, Moses murdered a man, remember? He got angry with one of the Egyptian guards, killed the guy out of anger. You can see where Moses came down with the Ten Commandments, saw the people committing idolatry. Should he have been angry? Yes. Was God angry? Yes. Should Moses take action? Yes. Should he break the tablets of stone written by the hands of God? And, okay, understand, his anger was okay, but he was provoked. And he wasn't the one who did wrong. They were the ones who did wrong. But the bottom line is, breaking the two tablets of stone was not a good idea.

So you think about the time when they didn't have any water and God said, okay, go strike the rock. and I'll bring forth some water. And the people were cranky. The people complaining and graping, complaining and graping. Finally, he just lost his temper and said, okay, you rebels, here we go. We'll bring water out for you. He started pounding on the rock. If you read the story in Numbers 20, what God told him was... Wait a minute, wait a minute. You were supposed to say, God will bring water out of the rock. And secondly, he didn't have to call them a bunch of rebels. All he had to do was walk up and say, trust God, tap the rock, I was going to bring water out. And God says, you know, you lost your temper one last time. You're not going into the promised land. That's a pretty stiff price to pay. Why did he do that to Moses? Because God is cruel? God is mean? Because God likes to punish? No, he did it because Moses had to learn agape. And one of the problems Moses had, he got provoked.

Of course, I would have, if dealing with what he was dealing with, one day I would have got up, got on the fastest horse in Israel, got on it, and rode away as fast as I could and said, you people find yourself out of this mess, right? I'd have just said, "I'm not leading you people anymore." He's stuck with them. But he had to learn not to be provoked. So he didn't go into the promised land. He never got upset with God over that decision. At least it's never written. I mean, you know, whatever upset he got, he got over. He dealt with it. And why? Because he understood what God was doing in him. He couldn't be driven by that. He had to think clearly through the anger.

Now, what are some of our sources of anger? Well, a main source of anger to us is any threat to our life, any threat to our well-being, or any threat to our self-image. I mean, and this is why I say you could not...you know, "Do not be provoked" doesn't mean you can never experience anger. If someone comes up to you and is breaking into your house, okay, the guy says come up to you, you know, you hear them breaking, the window breaking, and you feel a mixture of anger and fear. You have to. If you didn't feel anger and fear, you'd walk up and say, "Hey, how you doing?" I mean it's just not logical. You have to react because your life is threatened. Now when your well-being is threatened, you know, when your boss at work tells you he's going to fire all of you, what do you get? Angry, because your well-being is threatened. So, you know, this is normal to have anger and worry, fear, these things get all mixed together. But here's what's really amazing. We will have the same level of anger when our own self-image is threatened. When we feel like somebody has attacked our self-image, we will react with the same level of anger as if they were attacking our lives and then we will become provoked. We will decide now we must take action because I am provoked, because my self-image. And there's where we get in trouble. There's where we get in trouble.

A second source of anger, so those are normal sources of anger for human beings, is biological disposition. What I mean by that, some people are wired to experience anger quicker than others. They're just wired that way. And I get angry real quick, it goes away. You know, I can be angry with you for 30 seconds, and a minute later I can't remember why I'm angry. It's just sort of gone. I know people who are mad at somebody and they remember ten years later. You know? But they're sort of wired that way. They have to work on that. Everybody has to work on...you know, mine is, "Oh, I'm mad." Punch in the nose and then say, let's go have a beer. That's not a good way to handle problems, okay? It is my normal disposition. Now I'm 54 years old. I've learned not to do that so much. I don't do that near as much as I did 30 years ago. But every once in a while it's like, boom! "Hey, let's go have a beer." "Oh, you just punched me in the nose. We're gonna have a word." Well, they're not, okay? But other people have different issues with anger. Some people anger is just, it sits in their mind and won't go away and they have to learn to deal with that in a different way. So there is a disposition we have to understand that has to do with personality. That doesn't mean you can justify what you do. It just means you have to understand.

Sometimes anger comes from influence from our environment. Chris isn't here, so I'll use him as an example. When he was a little kid he watched this cartoon one time every day when he came home from school. I wasn't paying a lot of attention to it because he'd been watching some show when he came home from school, came and let him watch a half-hour TV. It was pretty harmless. But he started talking about the show, he was watching the show, this other show. And we were noticed he was having strange behavior. I mean, he was like eight years old, or something like nine years old. He was having this very strange behavior. And he was like nervous, and he was aggressive. And I go, what's happening to him? Something happened in school? Everything was fine. Then one day I said, you know, he's not like that when he comes home from school. He's not like that later. What's happening? We said, it must be that show. I sat and watched the show one day with him. It was the most violent cartoon I've ever seen. I mean, it was terrible. And I watched him change. The little guy's mind couldn't absorb all this stuff. And when he was done I said, "Chris, we're not going to watch that show anymore." And for the first time in his life, he was sort of rebellious. He was the easiest kid in the world to raise. And all of a sudden, he's, "No dad, I am going to watch that show. What do you mean? I'm going to come back to it." "Chris, look how you're acting." Well, you can't say that to a kid. I said, "Tell me how you feel." "Well, I'm just mad." "Why are you mad? Are you actually mad at me?" "Well, I'm mad because you won't let me watch the show." "Why?" And as we worked through it, "Well, the show makes me mad." He had to work through it, but he did. The show made him mad. And it was one of just the most obvious times I've ever seen a human being being driven by an air environment so strongly. His own brain could not process the violence he was watching. Took him off the show and within two days he's back to normal self. And it's like he was fine. So we never watched that show again. So our environment can drive us sometimes, we have to be very aware.

A fourth reason that we become very angry at times is repeated negative experiences. Now, parents, this is especially true with our children. You can treat your child. And this is why Paul says that about us fathers, don't provoke them to anger. We can treat a child so negative for such a long period of time that they simply become angry. That anger sits inside of them and they become angry. And then as an adult, they have all kinds of anger problems. Repeated negative experiences will do that. I mean, in serious marriage problems, I'll sit down with the couple sometimes and say, "But he or she is doing it right now?" "Yeah, but for ten years they did it wrong. So I'm so angry." "Wait a minute. But they're doing it right now." Doesn't matter. The anger is so strong, they can't give up the anger because of the repeated negative experiences. So sometimes we have to find out we're angry because we've had so many negative experiences, we're just angry. That's why we have to work through that.

And then the last, of course, is in...the fifth source of anger is in Ephesians 2. This is real important because this is where uncontrolled anger takes us, even if this isn't the source. So this can be the source of anger. This can be the source of anger, or it can be the gasoline that gets thrown on our own anger inside ourselves. This is why this is important. When we get to this level of anger, we cannot experience agape. We can't live agape when we get to this level. Ephesians 2 verse 1, "And you, He made alive who were dead in trespasses and sins, and which once walked according to the courts of this world, according to the prince of the power of the air, the spirit who now works in the sons of disobedience, among whom also we all once conducted ourselves in the lust of our flesh, fulfilling the desires of the flesh and of the mind," and what? "We were by nature children of wrath just as the others." Provoked, easily provoked, driven by anger. Anger is such a powerful emotion.

Now some of you may have the personality that you don't, but most people experience anger a couple of times, numerous times during the day. Now you might have some days you don't, then you know the kids decide to use your makeup as paint on the wall, or that person you have to work with who's naturally somebody that's impossible to live with decides to be really impossible today, right? Or the dog really did eat your homework. And so we deal with the anger responses. That anger is not sin. That's what is called being human. It's part of who we are. It's what we do with it that counts. And that's why this has to do with the agape, because Satan will feed anger. He loves it when we stay in an angry state, because he will feed it so that we're angry all the time. And when we're angry all the time, it is absolutely impossible, it's absolutely impossible to respond to God's Spirit. So we have to understand.

Now, here's some three ways that handling anger won't work. So if we're not going to be provoked, we have to understand that these won't work. One is uncontrolled ventilation, right? Screaming, name-calling, sarcastic put-downs, throwing things, violence won't work, right? It just won't. Uncontrolled ventilation of anger is destructive. People kill other people in those moments of totally ventilated anger. So uncontrolled ventilation won't work.

Now, on the other side, simply repressing anger, And bottling it up and pretending that you don't have it won't work either. What happens in those cases is the good examples in Jonah, Jonah chapter 4. Jonah chapter 4. Usually, we go to the book of Jonah to read all the different accounts. I just want to look at one little thing here that's important in understanding his human reaction and why he felt the way he did. Jonah chapter 4. Now you remember what happens here. He goes to Nineveh, he doesn't want to go to Nineveh, he ends up being sent by God there anyways. He tells them to repent and they repent. What he really wanted was to see the Assyrians fry. Okay? That's what he really, really wanted. So now he's angry. He's angry at the Assyrians because they repented. He was angry with them before because they were the bad guys. Now he's angry with the Assyrians because they repented, which tells you something about anger. Anger will drive us to not let somebody repent. And so in verse 3, what happens to it? He says, "O Lord, please take my life for me, for it is better for me to die than to live." And the Lord said, is it right for you to be that angry? Now, the book of Jonah ends with what? Jonah sitting outside of Nineveh saying, please fry them, please fry them, please fry them. And He doesn't. And it ends with this depressed angry man sitting there waiting for God to please fry these people. Repression and bottling anger leads to a lack of forgiveness, and it actually leads to depression. A lot of depression is anger that's never been worked through. And this isn't psychology, this is just reality, folks. It's what the Bible shows. And then A third, you know, repression or bottling anger, it's there. You feel it. Of course, I'm angry. But you really don't deal with it.

A third way is you actually deny it. I'm not angry. Oh, every man in this room has faced that one. What's wrong, honey? Nothing. Uh-oh. Because I have no idea after 30-some years of marriage what the next response is supposed to be. Something's wrong. Yeah, you find out 99% of the time it has nothing to do with you, you know. I'm upset because the kids didn't call today, or I'm upset because I didn't want to tell you the air conditioner broke down today, right? But what do we do, guys? We automatically think, it's going to be me. I've done something wrong. Of course, I think they do that on purpose too, because it's like, let him suffer for a while, then when I tell me the air conditioner broke, he won't feel so bad. Gotta tease 'em a bit. But denial is a serious issue. We just deny it and yet we are angry. Other people can see it. I've sat down with people and said, "Why are you so angry?" "I am not!" 'Yes you are." 'No, I'm not." "But you are. And this anger's tearing you apart." And then it's something like, "Well, if you knew what my childhood was like," or something like that. "So you are angry! Everybody knows it but you."

So what is righteous anger? Okay, how do we have righteous anger then? How do we have anger that's acceptable, that isn't self-destructive? If we're all going to experience anger, how do we have agape so that we're not provoked, our anger doesn't drive us to wrong or destructive actions? Some people, this isn't a big issue for some of us. We struggle with this. We have to learn not to let anger drive us to destructive actions. Well, first of all, let's go to Ephesians 4:26. Ephesians 4:26. See how this all has to do with our character. Whether we're talking about envy or not rude or long-suffering, not provoked, it all has to do with how we face life. This is what conversion is at that deepest level.

Ephesians 4:26. "Be angry and do not sin." And then there's this very interesting little bit of wisdom. "Do not let the sun go down on your wrath." In other words, do not let it eat away at you. Let it go. It's got to be short-lived. When we find ourselves consumed and obsessed with anger, we realize we've crossed the line. Now sometimes, you say, I should be angry. I mean sometimes it's, you know, you turn on the television news and you get angry. But son, you can't live with that level of anger. You can't hate politicians and live a happy life. There's some point you say, I have no control over what, you know, the President of the United States does. I have only control over my relationship with God and what I do every day with the people around me. Now that doesn't mean you don't feel angry from time to time when you see the sin and decay of society. We should. That's righteous anger. But you never hang on to that very long. You give it to God. You don't let the sun go down on that wrath. I've met many people that have had good marriages because they took that literally and they would not go to bed angry at each other. They agreed that they wouldn't go to sleep angry. Now, sometimes they stayed up half the night, but they had a happy marriage because they took that in a very literal sense. We will not go to sleep angry. And every couple I've ever talked to that's done that said it made their whole lives different. Because you don't wake up angry. You wake up okay, so the next day is different. The next day is different.

So our first principle is understanding that righteous anger is short-lived. You actually let go of it. There's a point where you turn and do something else. You don't hold on to that so it obsesses you, it controls you. But it's real, it's there, and it's righteous, but you don't let the sun go down. The second is that a person experiencing righteous anger never allows themselves to cross that line to where they're manipulated by Satan. You know, there's a point where anger loses control. You cross a line and you've lost control, and you will say things, you will think things, you will do things that you would normally never do. That's because we're giving ourselves over to Satan's attitude. And not possessed or something like that, but his attitude. We're surrounded by Satan's attitude all the time. And one of the core components of who he is, is he is provoked. He's mad at God, he hates God, and he's provoked. And his anger is constant and it's intense.

Look at the very next verse here, Ephesians 4:27. Because it says, verse 26, "Be angry and do not sin, and do not let the sun go down on your wrath." But that's not the end of the sentence. The next verse is the rest of the sentence, "nor give place to the devil." Or opportunity, that can be translated to opportunity. Don't give opportunity to Satan, because if you lose it... Have you ever said something in anger and it's almost like it's coming out of your mouth and you don't want it to come out and your brain is saying, "That's wrong." And it's coming out and then it comes out and it's like you're thinking, what idiot said that? Who in the world would say that? But it already came out. Because we go over that threshold, and when we do, we're in real trouble. So righteous anger is short-lived. We don't let it cross that boundary where Satan controls us.

Number three, righteous anger is experienced when there is a moral principle involved. Most of the time we're angry because someone said something or did something and it hurt us. It hurt our feelings. Our self-image is at stake. That's why we're angry because our self-image is at stake. Part of the problem is then we'll get angry even when there's a moral principle involved, and then let our self-righteousness drive us instead of righteousness. That's a whole other subject, how we can be driven by self-righteousness and think it's righteous. So this idea that there's a moral principle involved. And you have to know what that moral principle is. You have to be very firm in that it's a moral principle of God. And that's a hard line to walk sometimes. because sometimes our own pride is hurt. And we think then we're driven by a moral principle.

A fourth is a person who has righteous anger gets angry at situations. They're not angry all the time. So you can be angry because the guy said he would fix your car. It was two hours after he said he would fix it, and then it wasn't done right. Okay? It's okay to feel some anger at that. Now to go burn the guy's place down is not righteous anger. Okay. But the feeling of anger is okay. He didn't do his word, he didn't do the job right. That's a moral principle. Now, what are you going to do with it though? There's the problem. When the situation is taken care of, you let go of the anger. And the older you live, the longer you realize a lot of situations never get taken care of. So you just let him go? You just never go back to that shop, right? You never go back and have your car done there again because you know they're not going to do the job right, and it's not going to be done on time. And, you know, every time you drive by the guy's shop, you're mad for two hours. That's not righteous anger because it has no meaning, it has no purpose. Let it go.

There's a guy. Man, messed me up one time. "Get out of my way, buddy." And now you're mad at everybody else. Anger is a way of just spreading. It's like a virus. We just spread it from person to person. And so there's times you realize you're angry at a situation, but you're not an angry person. Look at Proverbs. Proverbs 11. See, I'm already cutting out material. Proverbs 11:23. "The desire of the righteous is only good, but the expectation of the wicked is wrath." You go into a situation expecting to be angry, and guess what you're going to be? Angry. The expectation is wrath. And so angry people expect wrath, they expect anger, they go in every place prepared for the wrath, for the anger to take place. They can be angry before anything's actually happened. Proverbs 19 verse 19. "A man of great wrath will suffer punishment. For if you rescue him, you will have to do it again." Someone who's angry all the time keeps ending up in messes because they're angry all the time. Their very anger creates the mess over and over and over again. They're very anger creates the mess.

So number four, as a person who has righteous anger gets angry at situations, they're not angry all the time. If you're angry all the time, then we have an agape problem. "Is not provoked." Because I can guarantee you, you're being provoked all the time. If you're angry all the time, it doesn't take much to provoke you, does it? It just doesn't take much.

Fifth point. Now this is what's really hard. This is the point I really have trouble with. Righteous anger is used to energize positive actions. What do you mean? Righteous anger produces positive actions. Mark chapter 3, perfect example, absolutely perfect example, is Jesus Christ who gives it to us. Mark 3. Righteous anger produces or energizes positive actions. So if your anger keeps producing more and more strife, why? Now once again, it may be that the other person won't, you know... We've talked about in this agape all the time, you're going to reach other people who will not and just refuse to be angry. So, okay, what do I do with my anger? Well, let's try to produce something positive. How do you produce something positive out of anger? Mark 3:1. "Jesus enters the synagogue again, and a man was there who had a withered hand. So they watched him closely whether He would heal him on the Sabbath, so that they might accuse Him." Now, that's a pretty nasty thing to do. They're waiting around, waiting for Jesus to do something good so they can accuse Him of breaking the law. "And He said to the man who had the withered hand, 'Step forward.' And He said to them, "Is it lawful on the Sabbath to do good or to do evil, to save life or to kill?'" Now that's a brilliant argument. It's a rabbinical argument that the Pharisees had all the time. They believed you should do good on the Sabbath. They believed you should heal or save life on the Sabbath. They didn't believe you should heal on Sabbath, but you should save life. Of course, his argument is if you're going to save life and I save this man, you tell me what's wrong with it. They knew they were trapped in a logic problem, so it says they were silent. Verse 5, "And when he had looked around at them with anger," Jesus is angry. God in the flesh is angry. "being grieved." I mean, he really stresses this. Mark wants to stress he was grieved, "by the hardness of their hearts. He said to the men, stretch out your hands, and they all became withered hands." That's not what it says. Because that's what I'd have done. I know what I'd had done. Okay people, there you go. I'd have withered all their hands. You bunch of hard-hearted Pharisees. That's not what He did. He said, ''Stretch out your hand.'' And the man stretched it out, and his hand was restored as whole as the other. His anger motivated Him. because it was also agape. You see what I mean? He wasn't provoked. His agape motivated Him. even though He was angry with these people to do good to this person. That's amazing. That's God. That's what's absolutely amazing, because He could have withered all their hands. That wasn't a problem. Understand? That was easy to do. Ask the Father, the Father will do it. Did they deserve it? I personally think they did. What's amazing is Jesus Christ didn't. He healed the man who had the withered hands.

That's agape, folks. That's a whole different way of looking at life, isn't it? Agape will take our anger and find a way to do something good with it. We use our anger to find a way to do something destructive. That's why, before we take action when we're angry... There are times Kim will say...ask me a question. I'll say, I'll wait. Why? Because I'm upset or I'm angry at something, and I'm just not going to talk to anybody for a half hour because I don't want...you know, someone's on the phone, or I'll come home from someplace, and someone will call and say, "Please call me, it's an emergency." And I know somebody didn't die, I mean, not something like that, or during the hospital. I know what the emergency is. And I'll say, "I'll wait 15 minutes." And she'll say, "Why?" "I'll say, because I'm upset from our last visit. And that person doesn't deserve the last visit to be taken out on them." We have to understand we have to give ourselves time to decompress from situations before taking action.

Proverbs 15:18. Because I tell you what, every time I haven't done that, I have been real sorry because of the way I eventually treated somebody. Proverbs 15:18. "A wrathful man stirs up strife. But he is slow to anger, allays contention." In other words, he's able at times to ratchet down, bring down the conflict. And if you can't bring down the external conflict, bring down the internal conflict. Do not be provoked. I'm not saying don't be angry. Do not be provoked. Don't let others dictate your actions. That's hard. Don't let others dictate your actions. It's never easy. It's agape. This is the conversion process. I am so glad God is not dictated by my actions. I don't know about you, but I'm really, really, really glad that God's love towards me is not dictated out of all His reactions to my actions or I'd be in very bad shape. That's agape.

Sixth point. Righteous anger never generates hatred. It never generates hatred. That's why in the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus said, don't call your brother worthless. He didn't say, don't go to him and say, you know what, I'm angry with you. He didn't say that. Anger is not...an anger in of itself is not necessarily a bad thing. He didn't say, don't do that. He didn't say, go to him and say, worthless, right? Sermon on the Mount, Matthew 5. Don't call him Raqqa. That's what that means. So going to your brother because you're angry is fine. It's how you do it. If you go to your brother, put him in a headlock, drive him to the ground, and punch his lights out, that's not a good way to start. But that's what we do so much of the time.

And then the seventh is righteous anger doesn't produce depression. When you find yourself becoming depressed over your anger, you realize you've passed into a human experience because God's never depressed. God grieves, but that's a totally different thing. When we find ourselves depressed over anger, we've crossed the threshold. We have to step back and say, "Wait a minute, get rid of that anger. Let's get rid of it for a while. There's enough to be angry about tomorrow." Don't worry, if I get rid of my anger, don't worry about it. There'll be enough to get angry about tomorrow. There's always something. "Is not provoked." We let it go, so we're not controlled by it, and we're not controlled by others. We're in the hardest stuff we'll ever do. I've never met anybody that has this agape down yet, except Jesus Christ. The rest of us are still working on it.

Now I want to finish up with how to respond with righteous anger. You say, well, last time we talked about tact. Yes, but tact has to do with not being rude. You know, tact is something you do when...it's just a way of treating people. What do you do when you're really mad? Tact doesn't mean much when you're really mad. See, it's like, okay, I'm angry, how do I deal with this? First of all, we must recognize that most of the anger we experience is destructive to our emotional and spiritual health and it's destructive to other people. Okay? Well, you have to just be honest about that. Even if the anger was righteous when it began, what it ends up with is so destructive so many times.

Proverbs 27:3. Proverbs 27:3. You're all starting to look a little sleepy, but... So I could get angry and start pounding, but I'm Proverbs 27:3. "A stone is heavy and sand is weighty. But a fool's wrath is heavier than both of them." We can't carry that stuff around. But we fear if I give up the wrath, then I'm letting somebody get away with something. No, you're not. If you carry the wrath, you're letting them do something to you. If you carry the anger like a stone, you're letting them do something to you. So we have to understand sometimes to take that rock and throw it off. Now, if we can use that wrath, use that anger to bring about a positive action, that's good. Sometimes you have to stand up against someone at work. So, you know, your neighbors are screaming and yelling at your child, and you have to go out and say, stop that. Don't treat my child that way. And you're angry. Once again, you have to learn to control it, but there's nothing wrong with that anger. You're doing a positive action, you know, going over and toilet-packing your neighbor's trees in the middle of the night is not a good way of expressing the anger. It's not productive. It's not positive. Calling the police about your neighbor? It may be, it may not be. You have to think that one through. You know, if they're shooting your dogs, you may need to call the police, right? But what is the motivation?

Number two, discuss your anger with God and ask Him for help through His Spirit. when I'm dealing sometimes with people who have real anger problems I have them keep a diary of what makes them angry every day, and then look for patterns. And people walk around with a little book, and they rain down. "Wow, I was angry 37 times today." "Maybe you need to just back off of that. Why are you that angry?" I've never kept a diary, but I've done it in my head. Why do I get angry? And I have to tell myself, stop it. I'm telling myself...I'm chewing myself out about ten times a day, okay? Stop that. Don't do that. That's stupid. Why did you do that? Come on. You're better than that. Go ask God's forgiveness and get back on track. I'm doing it to myself all the time. I have to because I'm not on track all the time. I wish I was. And there are times that don't do that. "God, please help me. Why am I so angry?" You have to go ask that sometimes. Go ask for help from His Spirit. Ask for agape. Ask, "Help me not to be easily provoked. If I'm not going to be provoked, then where's the anger coming from? How do I make this righteous anger?" Sometimes it's turning it over to Him and letting Him do what he wants to do. Sometimes it's turning it over to him and saying, "Okay, I trust you, you will fix this because I can't." Sometimes that's what it comes down to. Turning it over to him and saying, "I can't be angry God because it's hurting my relationship with you. It's hurting my relationship with my friends. It's hurting my relationship with my wife or my husband or my kids. I can't do that. So I'm just giving it to you and I'm stepping back from the anger." Sometimes we just have to do that. And if it's a righteous anger, God's angry too. So let him fix it because sometimes we can't fix everything.

And number three. When first feeling anger, force yourself to take that step back, that time out. You know, the counting to ten, it sounds so silly, but counting to ten is absolutely amazing. I've realized this over the years, when I write an email in anger, I let it sit 24 hours. What I find is 90% of the time or better, it never gets sent or, the other 10%, it gets modified. But if I sent it right then, boy, would I be in trouble all the time. I'm learning not to write them in your little draft box because you don't want them sent out by accident, right? Write them as an attachment, and then you don't have that mistake. But 9 out of 10 times I never send it. Because after 24 hours it's like, this isn't worth it. I won't help the other person. I'll just make the situation worse. Or it's amazing how many times things take care of themselves. But that's how we have to, you know, anger is taking that step back.

And fourth, Meditate on what makes you angry and how to handle it better to get positive results. You say, "Oh, today I get angry with someone at work and I chewed them out and said something mean I shouldn't have done it." Instead of sitting around beating up on yourself, because I guarantee you, two days from now you're going to have the same situation come up with that person or somebody else. Instead of beating yourself up, think, next time how do I handle that? Next time how do I deal with the anger before it gets to that point? Next time, if that person is pushing my buttons... You know what I mean? There are people that push your buttons. They know how to do it. They figure you out. They figure you out and they push your buttons. Next time say, nah. We stopped that before they ever pushed. They push one button? "Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. You're trying to push buttons here. We don't go there." Stop it before they take you there. But you have to think about it. Meditate on it. Can I produce something positive? Sometimes you can't. But when you can, try. When you can, try to produce something positive.

And then the last point is something we've said over and over and over again. So I'm not even going to a scripture. I have scriptures written down, but we've run out of time again because half the points we've gone through, learning to forgive is always one of the points. If I'm not going to be easily provoked, I have to learn to forgive. I have to learn to give up my emotional need for that person to receive payback and turn things over to the justice of God and hope people repent and receive mercy. When you do that, the anger goes away. Now, it doesn't mean that you accept wrong. It doesn't mean you now give up justice. We've talked about that. But this is all part of not being provoked. None of us are perfect Christians yet, but we are striving to become agape. That's why we are called to become His children. He means that literally. He is agape. Guess what we are to be? Just like Dad. Just like our elder brother. We're supposed to become agape.

I've given five sermons on this. I will give the next sermon on this and our next Bible study on this. I know I had a series of Bible studies I started through, but I've scrapped them because I want to get through this. And I still will not get through it. I'm going to ask Jim to get me...let me have a chance to come up here and finish it in another month or two.

Now, we've talked about conversion. We're beginning to see what a converted person looks like. Think about it. What we've covered in these five sermons... A converted person is willing to suffer for a long time with others' faults, sins, and quirks for the good of that person. A converted person does acts of kindness to everyone he meets, doesn't envy, but actually rejoices in the blessings of others. A converted person doesn't parade himself or allow himself to be driven by pride. A converted person is humble, easy to entreat, willing to forgive. A converted person is concerned with not offending others and tries to be tactful. He doesn't always have to have his own way, but has a spirit of cooperation. A converted person controls his temper and is motivated by righteous anger to do righteousness. We're beginning to see what a converted person actually looks like. None of us reached that, and we're sure hard on the others who don't. Right? But actually, we'll cover that next time. Because the next thing on the list is that agape thinks no evil.

So I won't be here next week, I'll be in Waco, but we'll be back the next week to discuss 'thinks no evil."