Broken Relationships

Well, the title of today's study is Broken Relationships. Broken Relationships. And I'd like to invite you to open your Bibles now to Luke chapter 15. Luke chapter 15. We're going to stay here in this chapter for the whole study of today. Luke 15. And what we find here is that Jesus is speaking, and He's about to give us three parables in a row. And as many of you know, parables are stories, we could say, about people or things. And they're told with the purpose to give listeners just what is valuable insight or valuable lessons. And Jesus is about to tell three such stories here to those who were gathered and were listening. So first we could ask, who was listening? Who had gathered around Jesus Christ as He began to tell these three stories, these three parables? Well, we discover who that is here in verse 1 and 2. Luke 15. Look at verse 1 and 2 here. It says, Then all the tax collectors and sinners drew near to Him, that's Jesus, to hear Him.

And the Pharisees and scribes complained, saying, This man receives sinners and eats with them. Let's stop there for a moment. So, who had gathered around Jesus Christ here for these stories? Well, you have the tax collectors and sinners, and you have the Pharisees and the scribes. Now, the Pharisees and the scribes were what would have been those who would have had their fingers in their ears, if you will. They wouldn't have been listening to Jesus Christ. They were the self-righteous religious group who were always complaining that Jesus was this man who ate with tax collectors and welcomed them in to different conversations that He was having. Tax collectors and sinners were those whose lives were obviously a mess.

Those lives, they knew they needed help, so they were intently listening to Jesus Christ. Their ears were actively open. They needed help.

So, you have these two groups, the tax collectors and sinners, who knew they needed help and were intently listening, and the Pharisees and the scribes there with their fingers in their ears.

So, with that, He begins to give them these three parables and see if you can detect what is the common factor amongst all these three stories here. So, He begins, verse 4, verse 4, Luke 15, verse 4. Jesus says, What man of you, having a hundred sheep, if he loses one of them, does not leave the ninety-nine in the wilderness, and go after the one which is lost until he finds it? Let's stop there. Now, every shepherd that's worth his salt understands this, and his family understands this as well. Dad, you've got ninety-nine sheep still out there. Why are you going out this late at night to find just the one? Why do you have to do that? Well, because it's my little lamb. I must go after her. But look, Dad, ninety-nine out of a hundred! Can't it wait? No, you don't understand. I love her, son. I love my little lamb. I've got to go find her. No trouble too great, no sacrifice too significant for the shepherd to go, no suffering too much to endure. And when he finally finds his little sheep, he puts her on his shoulder and comes back, and there's great rejoicing. Look at verse five and six here. Verse five and six. And when he has found it, he lays it on his shoulders, rejoicing. And when he comes home, he calls together his friends and his neighbors, saying to them, Rejoice with me, for I have found my sheep which was lost. And then Jesus makes the application here in verse seven. He says, I say to you that likewise there will be more joy in heaven over one sinner who repents than over 99 just persons who need no repentance.

And so with this, we understand, of course, Jesus Christ is the good shepherd who gives his life for the sheep. And when Jesus is speaking all these things that we're going to read today, just know he's the one who's coming after to seek those who need help and who knew they needed help. Even if it's just one, oh that little lamb needs help. And he goes and he searches and he finds her. Then he continues here with the second parable. This is the case of the lost coin here, verse eight through ten. The case of the lost coin, verse eight. Or he says, What woman, having ten silver coins, if she loses one coin, does not lie to lamp, sweep the house, search carefully until she finds it? And when she has found it, she calls her friends and neighbors together saying, Rejoice with me, for I have found the peace which I lost. Likewise, I say to you, there is joy in the presence of angels of God over one sinner who repents. So he says, Think about the lady who's lost a coin and searches carefully until she finds it. Likewise, Jesus is searching you out, his own, those to whom the Father has given him. Sweep in the corners of your life, walking down the halls of your days, searching with thoroughness. The lamp is lit.

The search is on until the coin is found. And when it's found, oh, there's great rejoicing. That which was lost is now found.

So they're ready. Their ears are perked as he goes into the third story here, and now he says, Well, now let me tell you a story about a father and two sons. Verse 11. He says, Then he said a certain man had two sons. Let's stop there for a moment. So their ears would have been perked up at this moment. A lost sheep and its shepherd, a lost coin and its owner, and now two lost boys. So what's the connection of all the three of these stories?

Well, they're stories of broken relationships. Broken relationships.

And this is the story, the story about his father and his two boys that we're about to read. It is the story of a broken relationship between a father and his son. And there are two boys in this parable, and they're both isolated from their father in different ways. So let's first look and focus in on here on the younger son, the prodigal, as he's described. Prodigal meaning reckless, careless. He's a reckless boy. He's a careless boy, and we are introduced to him here in verse 12. The younger boy we're going to see who's isolated as a result of leaving his father. And so the boy is abandoning his relationship with his father. Let's read his story. So verse 12 through 16. Verse 12 through 16.

Verse 12.

The younger of them said to his father, Father, give me the portion of goods that falls to me. So he divided them his livelihood, and not many days after, the younger son gathered up all together, journeyed to a far country, and there wasted his possessions with prodigal living. And when he had spent all, there arose a severe famine in the land, and he began to be in want. Then he went and joined himself to a citizen of that country, and he sent him into the fields to feed swine. And he would have gladly filled his stomach with the pods that the swine ate, and no one gave him anything. Let's stop there.

So you remember what Jesus Christ is doing here? Those who have been listening, the sinners and the tax collectors, those who needed help, those who would have maybe thought they were inevitably left out, whoever Jesus Christ is speaking about here, whoever Jesus Christ came to find, surely it's not them they would have said. How could he be interested in my life? And Jesus says, well, if you think I'm not interested in you, well, you're in for a surprise.

Let me tell you this story here, and he tells this story of this young man. And it's the classic scenario here in verse 12 of a young man who rebels against his wealthy father, a young man who says to his father again, verse 12, Father, give me the portion of my goods that falls to me, and I'm out of here.

He was dissatisfied with his father, dissatisfied with being in his father's house, young man or woman. We see this often, this scenario, when they say, I'm out of here, I'm gone. I don't like your rules, Father. I don't like your values. I don't like very much how you've been treating me. The only thing I like about you is your money. I like the inheritance.

So if you could just give me that, I could get out of here. Your life would be better. My life would certainly be better. Just let me go. Give me my money and let me go. This is not the normal desire for a young man or young woman to leave their parents or their father, you know, where a young man says, this is not the normal desire for independence.

Dad, thank you. I still want you in my life. I still want your guidance, your influence, but I want to get out on my own. It's not that at all. What he's doing is abandoning the relationship.

So he turns us back on his father and his father's house and walks away.

And make no doubt what Jesus Christ is doing here is he's masterfully painting a picture of our spiritual father here. In this young man's declaration for his physical independence, what we have here is the picture of when a man or a woman at some point in their lives break their relationship with their spiritual father. A young man who said, I want to live by myself and for myself. I want to be free of any rules or authority. I don't want you to have any say in my life. I want you out of my life. I don't want your involvement. I don't want your interference. Give me my portions that falls to me. In verse 13, so after many days the younger son gathered all he had together and went to a far country and wasted his possessions with prodigal living. So this was to be permanent in his eyes. Gathered together all he had. You know, if my son or my daughter came to me and said, I'm going to stay overnight or I'm going to stay at Jimmy's house. Then they proceeded together up the lamp and the sheets and the bedding. I would have said, well, is this for one night or is this a permanent night? So he gathered all that he had. He wasn't planning on coming back here. All that he had.

Again, you and I, we can turn our back on God in the same way. I'm finished. I'm out of here. I'm gone. I'm not coming back. And this young man did this despite the knowledge and the fact that all he had was his father's provision. And all that we have is our father's provision. The very mind we can use to deny God, that very mind is a gift from God. The very talents that make us feel that we can do it on our own, those very talents are the provision of your father.

All of your provisions are your father's provisions. That's why it's such a tragic thing. When a man or woman breaks their relationship with their father in this way, God your father has given you all your life. In order that you might enjoy a relationship with him, not in order that you might turn your back on him and say, well I'm done with you. But the young man cashed in his inheritance, not only took everything, he took it as far as he could, and as it says there in verse 13, went and squandered it away in a distant country, spent his life savings his inheritance.

Look at verse 14 through 16 again, 14 through 16. But when he had spent all, there arose a severe famine in the land, and he began to be in want. He joined himself with a citizen of the country and was sent out into the fields to feed the pigs. And he would have so just so hungry, so starving, he would have gladly filled his stomach with the pods that the swines ate, and no one gave them gave him anything. So he's down and out, to say the least. You know, when this young man, when he left his father on that day and gathered up all his inheritance and all this stuff, he just knew he had a wonderful and glorious future in his life. And if someone would have said to him, you know, in a relatively short period of time, you're going to be broke, you're going to lose all your inheritance, you're going to lose all your friends, you're going to have such low and no self-esteem, he would have said, you're crazy. You're absolutely crazy. But look at him now, hired out to feed the pigs, standing in the midst of of the pigs in that way. And you think that his friends in his early rousing around would have maybe come to help him in his extreme extremity here, but that's a staggering comment there in verse 16 at the end, no one gave him anything.

So this is pretty bad. This is pretty bad. But I want you to notice something here. Notice what is just a tiny phrase in verse 14. Maybe you caught it, but it's a phrase of great impact for us this morning. Verse 14 again, But when he had spent all, there arose a severe famine in the land, and he began to be in want. He began to be in want, in need. He began to see he needed help.

Maybe at this time, figuratively, his fingers came out of his ears.

And you wonder if some of those Pharisees and scribes there would have begun to do the same. The young man was beginning to understand he needed help, and this was doubtless a new experience for him. He had never known true need for his father. And I wonder, do we know? Do we know that we are in need this morning?

Well, he knows need now, and he's beginning to realize that there is only one that can help him.

His father. So in the pixdai comes a moment of great opportunity.

He lost his inheritance, lost his freedom, lost his self-respect, desires to eat the pig food.

But he's managing at this point to resist it, not actually lower himself to that point, but the hunger gnaws at him. It gnaws at him. Makes him begin to think. The hunger gnaws at him. Makes him begin to search. Is that you?

Are you beginning to think and to search, truly search?

Let me tell you, for those who are thinking and searching, the Bible makes it clear that turning from the father in that relationship provides no ultimate satisfaction. Can't.

It's not to say that turning from the father's way doesn't provide any satisfaction. There is some temporary pleasure, did you know, in turning from the father's way. There can be immediate gratification in turning from the father in this way. I'm sure there was immediate pleasure in the experiences that the young prodigal experienced when he set out. But what Jesus longs to say to us this morning is that the prodigal road with that road, there is no ultimate satisfaction. In the end, is destruction. I tried to think of a way to describe it. It's like drinking salt water if you're thirsty. It's like drinking salt water if you're thirsty. It can't eventually satisfy.

The satisfaction that comes from leaving your heavenly father, it's a mirage of satisfaction, and it fades very quickly. Well, there you have it. He lost his wealth, his freedom, self-respect. There is no hope, we could say at this point. There's no hope for this young man. No hope for restoration. This is it.

Well, let's stay with the story because the boy's journey is about to make a dramatic turn, and that turn comes in verse 17 here. Verse 17. This is remarkable. Verse 17 it says, But when he came to himself, he said, How many of my father's hired servants have bread enough and despair?

And I perish with hunger. Let's stop there for a moment. I love that phrase. There's so many phrases of impact in this story, but when he came to himself, when he came to himself, that seems to have a very 21st century ring to it in society. Have you ever heard someone say, I'm trying to find myself? You've heard that. And we say, well, let me introduce you to yourself. I'm talking to yourself, and they say, no, no, no, no. That's not what I'm talking about. I'm trying to find myself. So you understand what they're saying. They've never truly met themselves, or what the selves they did meet, they didn't like.

So they're trying to find some other identity. Some other identity through prodigal living. Some other identity outside of their father's house. They're trying to create an identity. But you see, the young prodigal, in coming to himself, he was now being gripped with the reality of life. And the reality is this. The absence of food, the almost starving to death, that was only an indication, it was only a consequence of what happens to a young man or young woman who break their relationship with their father.

We've been down this road, and many of us who have been in the church for a long time still try to see, still try to find some identity down that road sometimes, don't we? Outside our father's way. But we have to come to the understanding that we don't have to find ourselves.

We have our identity already. We are a son. We are a daughter of our Heavenly Father. That's who we are. So, here in the mud and the muck, it's all beginning to hit him. Who he is. He needs his father. But really, again, how could there be any hope for this boy?

He is just... think of all that he's done. It's way too far. It's been way too long. There's no hope. Unless, unless he finds waiting for him a searching, a seeking, a loving father. Look at verse 18 and 19.

Verse 18 and 19. I will arise and go to my father, and I will say to him, Father, I've sinned against heaven and before you, and I'm no longer worthy to be called your son. Make me like one of your hired servants. And look at this, verse 20 and 21. And he arose, and he came to his father.

But when he was still a far way off, his father saw him and had compassion, and ran, fell on his neck, and kissed him. And the son said to him, Father, I have sinned against heaven and your side, and I'm no longer to be worthy to be called your son. Amazing. Think about that. From far off, his father saw him.

Continuing, verse 22. But the father said to his servants, Bring out the best robe and put it on him. Put a ring on his hand and sandals on his feet. Bring the fatted calf here and kill it. And let us eat and be merry, for this is my son. For this my son was dead and is alive again. He was lost and is found. And they began to be merry. Let's stop there. You know, we might anticipate that the father would have taken this opportunity to give him the I told you speech.

While the son's standing there, just with the mud and the smelling clothes, we could anticipate that the father would have said, Well, you know, this is the kind of thing that happens to a young man who leaves his father. Boy, you look bad. Boy, do you smell. Why couldn't you have waited till after it's dark to come here? You're an embarrassment. You're an embarrassment to me. You're an embarrassment to your mother. And all that's true. All that's true. None of that's here. All right. Look at this story.

While he was still a far way off. So what is this presenting us with? What is Jesus presenting us here with? The father's looking down the road with a readiness to forgive. This young man, there's no way he could have ever anticipated this reception here. But while still far away off, his father saw him. Why did he see him so far off? He was looking for him, wasn't he? Looking for him. It's a wonderful picture. I could imagine the father coming out every morning, coming out to his porch. Maybe with great anticipation, covering his eyes from the morning sun and looking down.

See if there's any kicking up of dust. Maybe this is him. He sees some dust. Maybe this is my son looking, searching. It's not him. Sitting back down, only to look again, there's some kicking up of dust. Looking again, coming to the edge of the porch, intently searching for his son. Perhaps this is him. But once again, like yesterday, he sits back down on the porch.

He was watching for his son. The son who turned his back on him and shamed the family. He still watched. Then one faithful day, he sees him, off down the road. This wealthy landowner running, maybe picking up his robe as he runs after to meet his son. Those looking would have thought, wow, this is a spectacle.

I'm sure they followed behind him to see what was going on. He grabs him, embraces him, kisses him on his neck, throws his arm around him. None of it. Well, I guess you had to come back sometime. Come on, let's go in. We'll talk about this. No. Oh, the love, oh, the love that sought this young man.

And oh, the love that seeks you. Seeing, searching, running, throwing his arms around, kissing him, welcoming. This is the Father. This is the Father that we come every week to worship together with. This is who we worship. Have you found this kind of love with your Heavenly Father? And embrace this kind of relationship. And how do you explain this kind of response? Well, verse 20 says the one word. What's the word? He was filled with compassion. And your Father is filled with compassion for you.

If his friends would have followed him back from the pix I and saw him just a matter of hours earlier, you can just imagine what they would have said. Wow! Look at you! Well, we saw you just a little bit. Oh, boy, did you smell. Now, look at those sandals. Look at this robe. Look at that ring. What's going on? Whose party is this? Well, it's mine. No. What do you mean? Who did this? My Father did this for me. How does that work? What did you do?

Well, it all started when I realized I needed Him. I needed my Father. It's the moment when all this began to change. The moment began when He began to be in want, in need for His Father.

He keeps so many men and women from their Father and so many young men and women from their loving Father. They see no need for Him. They see no need for Him. That was the problem with the Pharisees and the scribes, by the way. Those that had their fingers in their ears. They saw no need for Him. Now, the text collectors and sinners, they knew. They knew they were wretched.

They needed help. There had to be some Pharisees at that time. Their eyes would have been as big as saucers. They were listening. They were beginning to get it. So, when we truly realize we need the Father, then and only then can we truly turn to Him. That's exactly it.

So, we must acknowledge our need for the Father today in that relationship. When we come to the final verses here, where now Jesus is about to deliver what is a direct blow to the grumbling Pharisees and scribes here that remained to this point. I'm sure there were many who had left this story long ago. But those that remained were about to find themselves identified squarely by the older son who now comes into the picture. As we know, Jesus began this story about two sons. So, many would have been wondering at this point, what about the second son? When will we hear about him? What happened to him? The other son? Well, he comes onto the stage here in verse 25. Now, his older son was in the field, and as he came and drew near to the house, he heard music and dancing. Let's stop there. Now, there was a discovery that the older brother would have hated to make. A celebration was taking place. Music people were dancing, and he doesn't go in. You notice here, he doesn't go in. It seems like that would be the most likely thing for him to do, to go right in and find out what's going on. He lived at this house, but perhaps he had a sinking suspicion. What was going on?

And what had actually happened? So, he calls one of his servants here to ask and to go in and find out what is happening. Look at verse 26 and 27. Verse 26 and 27. So, the older brother, he called one of the servants and asked what these things meant. And he said to him, Your brother has come home, and because he has received him safe and sound, your father has killed the fattened calf. So, the servant says, It's celebration time. Come on, your father, your brother has come home. He would have presumed that the older brother would have welcomed this younger brother just like the father had. He would have thought this would be wonderful news to pass on to him. He must have found it very hard to understand, as it says in verse 28, that the older brother became angry and would not go in.

So, this might have been perplexing to those who were hearing these stories. First, you have the shepherd who had found the one, and they all rejoiced, and rejoiced in heaven. The lost coin is found. Everybody rejoiced and rejoiced in heaven. And now, waiting to see how the story ends with this older brother. Would it be the same? Surely, this is what's going to happen. The older son sees the rejoicing and joins in with them, with the family. It doesn't happen that way. He became angry and refused to go in. So, strains of the Pharisee are beginning to play out.

Look what the father does. So interesting here. So interesting. Look what the father does. He goes in and pleads with his older son. Look at verse 28 through 32. Verse 28 through 32. But he was angry and would not go in. Therefore, his father came out and pleaded with him. So he answered and said to his father, Lo, these many years I've been serving you. I've never transgressed against your commandment at any time. And yet, you never gave me a young goat, that I might be merry with my friends. But as soon as this son of yours came, who has devoured your livelihood with harlots, you killed the fatted calf for him. Verse 31. And he said to him, Son, Son, you've always been with me, and all that I have is yours. It was right that we should make merry and be glad, for your brother was dead and is alive again, and was lost and is found. So let's stop there. So notice the older brother, he sends in a servant to the house to find out what's going on. But the father doesn't send that servant back out, you'll notice. Now he comes out to the older son. God doesn't treat us the way that we're tempted to treat him, does he? Very caring approach here. Goes out and pleads with him, with tenderness, gentleness in his approach. Hey, come on! Come in! What are you doing out here? Will you come in?

The father would have been more than justified to rebuke the older son for acting in this way. But instead, you'll notice he pleads with him. So there's an incredible love that the father extends to both sons. The one who went out and was lost, and the one who stayed home and was lost, extends the same love to both. Both were lost. Both in need for the father to go out to them. To the one he runs down the streets in the meat. To the other he comes out and pleads with him. Son, please come in the house.

All the years that he had been in his father's house, but those years of what we could see as obedience, they were beginning to show itself, those years. He was living with his father. But hadn't truly seen his need for his father the whole time.

Well, although the older brother lived with his father, he never, all those years, never achieved a true want for him. An understanding of a true need for him. But suddenly, that long-standing secret alienation becomes apparent.

You know, eventually something will bring this very thing to light. A man or a woman may live under the father's house, but that relationship is broken. And eventually something will show it for what it is, if that's the case. The contrast that Jesus is telling here, it's not a contrast between one young man who made a mess of it and another young man, an older man, who stayed home and did a great job. It's not the contrast here. What's the contrast? The contrast is between a repentant prodigal who understood his need for his father's grace and the unrepentant older brother who saw no need for it at all. That's the contrast. He could understand why this messed-up brother would need intervention and rescue, but not him. And, you know, it's not to say that the older brother wasn't really steady and good in many ways. He was a faithful son in many ways. Jesus is not saying that all Pharisees are all rotten, rotten all the way. The older son here doesn't represent some kind of just dreadful son. It says he had served his father in many years, not transgressed against his commandment. So what was needing to get across to the older son? The Bible says, All have sinned and all have come short of the glory of God. One definitely lived better. You can't argue that. He lived better. He stayed at home. He followed his God's commandments. His life from one perspective was better, more constructive than his brother, who made a mess out of it. But the difference is relative, we could say, because they were both equally sinners, both equally in need of mercy. And it was a fact that the older brother couldn't understand. The Pharisees and the scribes, they saw sin in quantitative terms. They saw sin in quantitative terms. But the Bible says, All have sinned and all have come short of the glory of God. And while the brother's sin is expressed indifferently than his younger brother, nevertheless, he's in the same predicament. He needed the same mercy. He needed his father just as much as his younger brother. And what he deserved, the older brother, what he deserved, he shouldn't be asking for. Look at verse 29 again. He said, Lo, these many years I've been serving you, Father. I've never transgressed against your commandment at any time, and yet you gave me, you never gave me a young goat that I might be married with my friends. Verse 30, But as soon as your son comes home of your hearse, who's devoured your livelihood, you killed the fatted calf for him. I deserve this, not my brother. But again, what he deserves, he should not be asking for. And we could ask ourselves this. Do we think that God owes us anything? Do we subconsciously think that God owes us something? We've been in his house, we've been keeping his commandments, we stayed home.

Does God owe anyone of us anything that he should repay us? No. But we hear that sometimes, and we even think about it sometimes for ourselves. She deserved better than that from God. He deserved better than that from God.

But we understand that if we actually got what we deserved from God, we wouldn't be in existence. We'd be banished from his presence forever. So the mystery is that we don't get what we deserve. That's the mystery.

Thankfully, the younger brother did not deserve the compassion he received from his father. He didn't deserve it. That's the whole point. We don't get what we deserve. That's the most wonderful thing about our father. One of the most wonderful things. He doesn't give us what we deserve. And it's a discovery that the older brother had to make. The older brother saw himself as spiritually sound, if you like, healthy. Therefore, he couldn't grasp the compassion by which the father welcomed the prodigal son home with. He couldn't see that he was in need of as much of grace as his useless brother, as he would describe. He couldn't see that he was in need of the same grace. If I go in, I'm not going to have to admit that I'm as messed up as my brother. I'm sure those thoughts went through his mind. These words of Jesus, they cut. They cut many of us here. They would have cut many there who have been living in the house, but were lost. Living in God's house, but not realizing the relationship is actually broken. Why is it broken? Because those living in the house lost their need for their father, and they became lost. So, we can merely be carrying out these religious activities in his house, like the elder brother, but not realize that we have lost our want of him and our need of him. And if that's you, if that's me, that's okay. That's okay, because the picture here is of a father whose arms are wide open with compassion and grace for all those who are his own. To the boy who went out and became lost, and to the boy who was lost at home. So, all we pray must come back to their father. May those of us who need to come back, because we went out and made a mess of our lives, come back and discover such compassion. Those of us who stayed home and find ourselves estranged from the father as well, need to come back and discover the compassion of our father. And we do so by praying and saying, you know, Father, I need you. I want to discover this kind of love from you. I want to discover this kind of love from you. I couldn't even imagine this. I just want to acknowledge that I need an embrace. I need you to fall on my neck and kiss me in this way, Father. I need the warmth of your arms. Declare today that you need Him. We should all be prepared to admit that today and declare that. And take a step toward Him.

Take a step toward Him, and what you'll discover is a father who rushes out the house to plead with you, come in, son, come in, daughter. You may even find a father who's running down the road to meet you, to embrace you, put his arms around you. Discover your need for Him today, and take that first step.