Feeling Guilty

You'll have to excuse me. My voice is a little weak today. I think I had a really bad reaction. Remember we had an oak pollen here a couple of weeks ago or last week or whatever it was? And I had a reaction to that, and I never quite got over it. I don't have a cold. I don't have the flu. I'm not contagious. I'm just miserable. Passover is coming up, and I know many of you have been, as we do every year before the Passover. There's a huge stress on all of us. We talk about there seems to be more trials in people's lives before the Passover. Sometimes it's not even more trials. It's just stress. You can't even define it. That stress is caused by Satan as he wants you not to keep the Passover. Because he knows that in observing the Passover, we are renewing a covenant that we made with God and baptism. And he doesn't want any of us to make that covenant. He doesn't want any of us to renew that covenant, because he wants us to be separated from God. During this time, not only do people have an emotional stress and spiritual stress, there's a lot of discouragement in people's lives this time of year. And at this time of year, there's something I deal with every year over and over and over again. And that's why every couple of years I give a sermon on this subject in one form or another, is that people say, I shouldn't keep the Passover this year because I've been thinking about my sins, my past sins, my present sins, and I just feel so guilty. I just feel so guilty that I just can't keep it. And it's an overwhelming feeling of guilt. I have failed in my life. I have failed as a Christian.

And I just can't keep the Passover this year.

I want to talk about guilt today. I want to talk about the actual state of guilt. But I also want to spend some real time talking about feeling guilty.

The emotion of feeling guilty. We talk a lot about God's law and how we are guilty. The Passover has no meaning unless we accept that we are actually guilty before the law of God.

But then we talk about how the Passover is supposed to give us this freedom and forgiveness. And many times we become very confused emotionally. Okay, I'm supposed to feel guilty, but then I'm supposed not to feel guilty? Well, what am I supposed to feel here? And feeling guilty becomes very much of an experience for a lot of people during this time period. And that's not all negative. I think we are supposed to have a little guilty feeling at this time as we begin to examine ourselves. We begin to look at what God's doing in our lives, how much we have fallen short, how much we need the sacrifice of Christ.

But if we just let the feelings of guilt, the guilty feelings overwhelm us, Satan will use those to actually take us away from God.

Guilt is a very simple issue. Guilt is a state of having broken a law or some moral precept.

If someone steals, that person is guilty. They have broken a law. They are legally guilty. So when we get into the definition of guilt, we're either talking about an actual law, we're talking about a legal issue, or we're talking about a moral precept.

You know, the person didn't actually break the law. This is what Jesus was talking about when he said, okay, breaking the letter of the law is committing adultery.

Having fantasies about a person in your mind is committing adultery. He extended that out and said, it's not just the actual breaking of the law that produces guilt.

It is the process and it is the spirit of the law. Breaking that also produces a state of guilty. You are guilty. You have done wrong.

All of us do wrong all the time, and we have to deal with, I have been done wrong. I am guilty.

We'll talk a little bit about the fact that there are some people that will never face guilt.

I am wrong with explanation.

They always have a reason for their guilt, and that guilt always gives them an out.

I really wasn't guilty.

Now, that doesn't mean sometimes we shouldn't explore the reasons why we do things.

Some person might say, well, I have this problem with drinking, but I always drink when I am stressed.

So, stress is a catalyst.

So, what you have to do is begin to learn how to deal with stress.

You can't use the stress as an excuse.

Hey, I am under stress.

But we need to find out what the catalyst stars.

So, that's not, you know, it's why do I do what I do?

But we can't use that as an excuse, only as an explanation.

Yes, I did this wrong. Here's the reason why.

I can tell you why I did it wrong.

But I can't use that as an excuse.

So, you'll understand. If I'm under stress, I'm just going to drink.

See, that doesn't work.

So, we understand the state of being guilty.

It has to do exactly with you. You have broken a law.

There are some people who don't feel guilty about anything.

We'll talk about that in a minute.

Let's talk about the emotions, then. The emotions of feeling guilty. I have done something wrong.

We should feel guilty.

In fact, we're going to talk about the conscience.

When the Bible talks about your conscience, what it's talking about is, what is the mental and emotional process that produces in you the concept of guilt?

The concept of, yes, I can do this, no, I cannot.

We're going to talk about conscience and the importance of having our conscience developed by God's Spirit.

Because there are times when we feel guilty about something that has nothing to do with God.

The feeling of feeling guilty or not feeling guilty sometimes has nothing to do with actual right and wrong.

And if we have a conscience developed by God's Spirit, feeling guilty will have to do with God, and not feeling guilty will have to do with God.

Before I go into that, let me show you a case where guilty feelings produce something good, and guilty feelings produce something bad.

And in both of these cases, the individual was guilty of doing something wrong.

Let's go to Matthew 26.

These events happened on the night of the Passover.

After Jesus was taken, after he did his Passover with his disciples, and he was taken, and there were two men who had to face decisions.

Both of them made the wrong decision.

Matthew 26, 69.

Now Peter said outside in the courtyard, and a servant girl came to him saying, You were with Jesus of Galilee.

Now remember, Jesus was being taken into being tried. They know he could possibly be killed.

They also know that if they're associated with Jesus, they could be arrested.

Peter's afraid, as anybody would be.

He doesn't want to be associated. He wants to be there.

He's trying to be there to support Jesus.

Remember what Jesus had told him?

You're going to deny me tonight.

Oh, I'll never deny you.

Yep. I could never do something that wrong.

Verse 70.

But he denied it before them all, saying, I do not know what you're saying.

I don't know this Jesus fella.

Look, it's nighttime. I'm around. There's a fire here.

I'm just sitting around.

I just have to be going down the street.

There's excitement going on. I want to see what it's all about.

I don't know what you're talking about.

And when he had gone out to the gateway, another girl saw him.

This fellow also was with Jesus of the Azure.

Now, she proclaims to other people.

He's one of those guys. He's one of those guys who followed Jesus.

But again, he denied them.

And oath, I do not know the man.

I swear I do not know the man.

Now, by taking an oath in this context, you were actually...

When they were taking an oath, they were saying, May God punish me.

In other words, this is a sacred thing.

That's why Jesus said, Don't take oaths.

It's a sacred thing. I am saying, May I be judged by God if I'm telling you wrong.

I don't even know this man.

Pretty serious sin, isn't it?

Pretty serious sin.

A little while, a little later, those who stood by came up and said to Peter, Surely, you also are one of them, for your speech betrays you.

Okay, you keep saying you don't know him, but you have a Galilean accent.

The rest of us around Jerusalem, our accent is different than yours.

We know by your accent that you were with him.

But then he began to curse and swear, saying, I do not know the man.

And immediately, a rooster crowed.

Jesus had told him, you will deny me three times before the rooster crows.

And Peter remembered the words of Jesus and said to him, Before the rooster crows, you will deny me three times.

So he went out and wept bitterly, absolutely overwhelmed with feelings of guilt.

He was guilty, and he should have had guilty feelings.

His feelings of guilt should have been there because you never have repentance.

Repentance is more than just an intellectual thought.

There are some feelings of guilt.

Now, his are very intense.

Because he said, Jesus said I would do this.

And I said, No, I'm a strong man. I won't do this.

I really am going to follow you. I'll follow you to death. I brought a sword. Do you remember?

Now, what happens? He's now out by himself in the middle of the night, just crying, probably telling God, How could you ever even listen to my prayers again?

Maybe he can't even pray at this point.

He feels so guilty, and he is guilty.

Now, if you think about it, what was the product of what he went through?

All you have to do is read the book of Acts.

The product of him going through this experience of, I accept my guilt.

I am wrong. I have no defense at all.

He repented.

Don't you find him in the book of Acts standing up in situations where he could have been killed and he could have happened to him that happened to Jesus Christ.

He could have been stoned. He could have been dragged off to the robots and crucified.

And what is he doing? He's standing up there preaching the Word.

Where did that power come from? It came from God.

Why did he have that power? Because those guilty feelings drove him to repentance.

So feelings of guilt have to be there.

Let's look at another instance here starting in verse 1 of chapter 27.

When morning came, all the chief priests and elders of the people plotted against Jesus to put him to death.

Where they had bound him and led him away, and delivered him the Pontius Pilate, the governor, the Judas, the betrayer, his betrayer.

How guilty can you be? He actually had turned him over for money. But, you know, as far as sin goes, Peter had denied him, too.

Peter had betrayed him, not in quite the same way that Peter had betrayed him.

He swore an oath that he didn't even know him. He did not want to be associated with him.

Judas had betrayed him for whatever motivations he had, but Judas began to realize this wasn't turning out the way he thought it was.

That Judas' betrayer, seeing that he had been condemned, was remorseful. He must not have expected him to be condemned.

This wasn't what he expected to happen. You mean they're going to beat him? They're going to kill him?

Look what they've done to him! You know, when morning came, he had been just mutilated and beaten.

And it says he's remorseful. Judas has overwhelming feelings of guilt.

I am guilty! Look what I have done!

He was remorseful and brought back the thirty pieces of silver to the chief priests and elders.

He brought it back and said, take this back. This was wrong.

Here, I don't even want this money. This wasn't what I thought was going to happen. This is what you told me would happen.

Saying, I have sinned. I am guilty by betrayed, innocent blood. And they said, why isn't that to us?

You see to it. You did this.

Then he threw down the pieces of silver in the temple and departed and went and hanged himself.

Different response to overwhelming feelings of guilt.

I have seen people being driven to God by knowing that they are guilty and having those overwhelming feelings of guilt drive them to God.

I've seen other people driven away from God because of their overwhelming feelings of guilt.

Either believing that God won't forgive them or not willing to face the real guilt that they have.

You can't spend your whole life feeling overwhelmingly guilty every moment of the day. You will go mentally ill. You'll lose your mind.

So when we have these overwhelming feelings of guilt, what we do with them is very, very important.

And the Passover has to do with guilt and feeling guilty.

And what we do with it.

Now when we talk about feeling guilty, feelings of guilt are developed in us, or not having feelings of guilt, are developed in us at a very early age.

Very early age.

If your mother told you, you are stupid long enough, you feel guilty because you believe you are stupid. And whenever something happens in life, it doesn't work out right. What do you say?

I'm your stupid. Right? And you feel guilty.

Guilt, the feelings of guilt are developed in us from a lot of different ways.

A lot of different ways in which it's developed in us.

And what we have to do is begin to sort out what is it that should make us feel guilty, and what is that shouldn't make us feel guilty.

Based on God. Because if we do God's, you will either end up with feeling guilty all the time, or not feeling guilty about anything.

And neither of those is where God wants you to be.

And both of those are very spiritually dangerous places to be.

Now feeling guilty about anything is really serious. Feeling guilty about everything is just equally as serious.

Let's talk about emotional guilt for a minute.

And I'm going to break this down for the sake of just simplicity. Three types of emotional guilt we have.

And what is really shamelessness? We have no guilt at all.

These kind of people only feel guilty if they're caught.

They really have no guilt at all. You've met people like that. They're capable of anything. Almost anything.

The only thing that keeps them from committing crimes is they're afraid they'll get caught. These people have no regard for law. They have no regard for social norms.

The only thing they have regard in is doing whatever they want, however they want, and everybody else is in their way.

And so the only thing they usually respond to is power. Whoever has the most power, they would go and rob the bank, but the policeman has a gun.

Now, if they get shameless, if that develops far enough into them, you know what they'll do? They'll just get a gun. Everything's about power.

It's all about power and control. It's never about right and wrong. And they're absolutely shameless.

A second kind of emotional guilt is what is developed in us by our families, by society, by our schools.

And you and I all have these feelings of guilt that are developed in us from childhood, and some of them aren't healthy.

You talk to people who can remember. Many of you think about this. You can think about something in your life as an adult. You feel guilt over or feel shame.

Feeling guilty or feeling shame over.

And you can trace it back to when you were in sixth grade, and you did something and all the kids made fun of you.

And you felt shame. And you still feel shame today. It has absolutely nothing to do with right or wrong. It has absolutely nothing to do with healthy emotions.

It has to do with what you learned.

And so, I feel guilty because, you know, my mother wanted me to marry this guy and I married somebody else.

I feel guilty because, you know, I just didn't do as well as school as everybody else. And my best friend over here, he went along and he's making $100,000 a year and I make $30,000 a year. I feel guilty about that. I feel shamed.

We can feel shame about things that have nothing to do with good, bad, right, wrong. It has nothing to do with what's good for your life.

And you know, and I know that. I've told you this before because I used to work in advertising. And one of the ways to motivate people in advertising is to make them feel guilty, make them feel shame.

I mean, let's face it.

The reason everybody else gets... The reason all the other guys get the girls that you don't is because you don't use this deodorant.

And aren't you ashamed that you're not a complete man? You're only half a man. If you use this...

And so the guy puts his deodorant on and all these women run up to him. Of course, that's not going to happen.

And he knows that's not going to happen. But if they can hit the guilt enough, you'll be a better person if you clean your toilet bowl with this.

And if you appeal to greed, you appeal to... If that doesn't work, you appeal to vanity. If that doesn't work, shame does a good way.

If that doesn't work, you use outright fear. You don't use this brand of toothpaste. All your teeth are going to fall out.

And you'll just walk around like gumming your food.

But see, the point is, the sell items... We don't always buy an item because it's logical. We buy it initially because it's emotional.

And so dealing to shame is actually a motivation. Speakers will use it. You know, these motivational speakers will use it sometimes. Advertisers will use it.

But all of us have things that we feel guilty about, we feel shameful for, that have nothing to do with right or wrong.

You know, teenagers will have an interesting dilemma sometimes, based on what is to them a moral dilemma.

As a teenager, one of the greatest things you could do that's wrong is betray a friend.

But what if your friend is doing something wrong? Did you know they're doing something wrong?

But if you turn that in, you've betrayed them, therefore you've done something wrong.

And they wrestle with that moral dilemma.

That is a real moral dilemma, and there's a way to work through that, but I understand the moral dilemma.

But I feel shame. I feel guilty. If I turn them in, I am not a friend.

But if they don't turn them in and the person hurts themselves, they feel guilty because they didn't turn them in.

And they're just caught in this thing that goes around and around and around. So we all have ideas of guilt that can be very constructive and can be very destructive, but have nothing to do with God.

So the third kind of guilt I want to talk about has to do with actually being guilty before God. And this is the greatest guilt we can have, because we have broken the law of God, or we have broken standards of God, and now we are guilty.

We stand before God as judge, and He opens the book, and He says, this is your charge, this is the law, and you're guilty.

I have all the proof, you're guilty. You are a criminal. And that's something that is hard for us to understand, but when all of us come before God, before we are baptized, we are criminals before God.

And I said, well, I did some bad things. No, no, no. You and I are criminals before God. We have broken the law.

If something doesn't happen to us that God has to do, we are unsalvageable. Understand that.

When we come before God, before baptism, unless God does something, we are unsalvageable in the state we are in.

The state we're in is you're criminals condemned to death, because God said, that's the best I can do with you in the state you're in.

The best you are as a criminal before God, before baptism, is a criminal condemned to death. That's what we offer.

We are guilty. You know, it's interesting how John deals with this in 1 John, talking to people who have God's Spirit, who have been forgiven.

And it begins to lead us to an understanding of, okay, I went through baptism. I was forgiven. That means the actual guilt was wiped out. 1 John 1 John 1, Chapter 1, Verse 5.

If we say we have fellowship with Him, Verse 5, this is the message which we have heard from Him and declare to you that God is light, and Him there is no darkness at all.

If we say we have fellowship with Him and walk in darkness, we lie and do not practice the truth. He doesn't say we just don't believe in the truth. We have to live it. We have to practice it.

But if we walk in the light, as He is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus Christ the Son cleanses us from all sin.

Many times, if we find ourselves not wanting to have fellowship with each other, it's because we have a problem between us and God.

As we are cleansed before God, we should want and desire to be spending time together with other people who are cleansed before God.

He says, if we say we have fellowship with Him and walk in darkness, we practice not for seven, but if we walk in the light, we have fellowship with one another. The more you are in the light, the more you will desire fellowship with each other. The less you are in the light, the less you will desire fellowship with each other. And part of that is, sometimes, because we feel guilty. We feel guilty because we have not accepted that Christ has cleansed us from all sin.

When you were baptized, understand something. That guilt, the literal guilt, was gone. And that's what we're going to do. Understand something. That guilt, the literal guilt, was gone. Remember in school, they'd say, this is going to be your permanent record.

I'm like, where is this permanent record? So people still think there's some kind of permanent record with God. Now, we're not talking about the consequences of sin. As I've said before, the temporary consequences of sin, they're not wiped out. If you go out here and you get drunk and you drive a car into a telephone pole at 100 mph, and because of that, you go blind, God's forgiveness doesn't always give you your eyes back in this life. You get them in the next, but not in this life.

There are temporary consequences of sin, but we're talking about your permanent record, real permanent record. You know what's on your permanent record right now? Someone who's baptized, washed cleanses of your sins, and you got up this morning and said, God, please forgive me for my sins and help me to continue to learn your way. You know what's on your permanent record right now? Nothing! Oh, no, there's the sin I committed in 1972. No! It's not there! But I still have the results of that. Someone says, I lived all through the 80s.

I just lived this wild lifestyle. Now I have an STD. It says, God, forgive me. What's on my permanent record? Nothing. He might have taken away the temporary penalty or the temporary consequence, but there's nothing on the books. There is no crime anymore. You are guiltless before God.

In spite of the fact, all of us walked around with scars, right? We're going to get into conscience in a minute. All of us deal with a scarred conscience because of our sins. All of us. We're not talking about your conscience. We're going to talk about that in a minute. We're talking about your permanent record before God. It's wiped out. It's not there. That's what every Passover reminds us. Why I've examined myself and I feel so guilty, I can't take the Passover.

I am unworthy because there's something wrong with me. Yes, there is something wrong with you. If you come to the Passover saying, okay, if you come to the Passover saying this, oh, good, I can keep the Passover this year because there's nothing wrong with me, please come talk to me because you're about to eat the Passover unworthily. In here we're still messed up. But what's on your permanent record before the Almighty God? Nothing. Well, what about what I did yesterday?

Well, have you asked God for forgiveness since then? See, here's what some people will do. They'll go once and never ask God for forgiveness. Then they wonder why they're feeling guilty. Well, you're supposed to. There is only one way to begin to deal with guilty feelings when you're actually guilty. First of all, you have to actually realize I am guilty. Peter had to come to grips with I am guilty. Judas had to come to grips with I am guilty. He had to go to God and say, Espach this!

Forgive me! Take this off my record! Now let me ask you something. Did Peter suffer from that sin for the rest of his life? Yes. Read his writings. And here's a man years later. And you can tell he still carried the guilt. The guilty feeling a little bit that he denied Jesus Christ. But he knew his actual guilt before God had been erased. Do it. Judas could not know that. He thought it was permanent. He could not ask for forgiveness.

He did not go to God and ask for forgiveness. And his mind, it was permanent. He had no choice but to kill himself. But he was going to go insane. Where he blinded every Passover, would you get on your knees because of the relationship you have with God, because you are brought into relationship with Him through the Passover of Jesus Christ. When you come before Him every day and you say, forgive me for my sins, the account goes to zero.

The past is already at zero. Do you still deal with guilt? Yes. Do you still deal with the consequences of it physically? Yes. I asked scars from sins I committed 20, 30 years ago. I still deal with it just like you do. What's that account before God? Zero. And that helps us get through it. The account before God is zero.

You can't go back and make it up. You can't go back and undo who you've been and what you've done. You can change. And the first steps in changing is, I am a criminal, which you did of baptism. I am a sinner. I accept forgiveness. I am not guilty anymore. Boy, am I messed up because of my sins. Internally, we're still messed up because of the sins, but legally before God. God doesn't look at your book and say, I remember what you did in 1993.

It doesn't work that way. You remember what you did in 1993 because you're still suffering the consequences of it. Because every sin does damage to us. You are damaged by your sin. I am damaged by my sin, and we live with that damage as we slowly get healed by God's Spirit. But before God, the account is zero. If it's not zero, then Jesus died in vain. And when you say it's not zero, what are you telling God?

He said, well, I'm still messed up. Of course you are! We all are. So let's separate that from the reality of what God sees. God sees a messed up person who was a result of a lifetime of sin. But because of your repentance, because of the sacrifice of Jesus Christ, because you received His Spirit, when you go before Him, legally, there's nothing on the books. There is no permanent record. It's not like the world where there's... Yeah, you commit a crime, right? That crime stays with you the rest of your life. Go rob a convenience store, and that will be with you the rest of your life.

Of the books of God, it does not. That's really hard for us to understand. On God's book, it does not exist anymore. God's more concerned with who are you now, right now, today. Who are you now? Who are you going to become? Who are you going to become? We have got to let go of the past here. We're just going to drag us back into the past, and you'll become what you used to be. You'll become what you used to be. It's the problem with feeling guilty. You know, He says on here, verse 8, John continues, If we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves.

Shamelessness is self-deception, and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness. But we say God can't forgive thee. We are saying God is not faithful, and therefore we are attacking God. We're blaspheming God. God can't forgive thee. If we confess our sins, He is faithful. We are doubting God's faithfulness. Either He will do what He says, or He won't.

If we say we have not sinned, we make Him a liar, and His Word is not in us. Verse 1 of chapter 2, My little children, these things I write to you says you may not sin. He says that we understand this, that we are cleansed, that we constantly can go, and before God to be forgiven, that we will be motivated not to sin. We will be motivated not to sin.

We want to have this relationship. We want to be in this kind of relationship with God where we don't sin. We hate sin. And we will feel guilty when we sin, and we will not be like Judas. But we will be like Peter. And what that guilty seal, that motivates us to do.

He says, I write to you so that you may not sin. Second part of verse 1 now, and if anyone sins, we have an advocate with the Father Jesus Christ the righteous, for He Himself is a propitiation for our sins, and not for ours only, but for the whole world. What does this motivate us to do? Verse 3 tells us, Now, by this we know Him that we keep His conveyments.

And He who says, I know Him, but does not keep His conveyments is a liar, but the truth is not in Him. Incredible encouragement and incredible statements of, but this is what it must produce. Feelings of guilt bring us to our advocate. An advocate is a defense lawyer. And your defense lawyer is like no other defense lawyer in history, because what your defense lawyer says to the judge before you were baptized, Oh, my client is guilty of sin. Literally. My client is absolutely a criminal, and in present state, my client is worthless, and deserves eternal death.

Wow, what a defense lawyer. And then your defense lawyer says, But apply my blood in that person's death. Is He faithful to do that for you, so that your permanent record is zero before God?

Zero.

You know, it's interesting when we look at when we look at New Testament examples of what guilt produces, what feeling guilty. I am truly guilty before the law of God. Sometimes we'll feel so guilty about something that has nothing to do with the law of God. You know, I feel so ashamed. My team lost our soccer game. What?

How about the shame, because this week, the time you, before another person, not in the church, acted in such a way that the person says, Well, if that's a Christian, I don't want anything to do with Christianity. What about that?

How often are you driven to your knees before God because of shame and guilt, because you actually did something wrong, and you can't do anything about it. You can't do anything about it. It's too late. You can't fix anything. We should be. We shouldn't be. You know what we usually do with guilt feelings? We try to make them go away by doing something else. Or we try to blame somebody else. We just blame somebody else. We don't get better to accept. The more we accept our guilt, the more sensitive we are, our conscience, the more guilt we feel at times. The more guilt we feel. But it has to be the right time. We have to give up feeling guilty over things that aren't important. They don't have anything to do with God. 2 Corinthians 7. You know, in 1 Corinthians, Paul writes the most scathing letter in the New Testament. He just tears these people apart, tells them to put somebody out of the church, tells them to just stop doing the whole Lord's Supper. They had it so messed up, it gave them instructions on how to really keep the Passover. I mean, we've talked before about how what a mess that church was. He writes them this letter, scathing letter, and then later regrets that he sent it. He said, wow, is that hard on these people. But they sent him a letter, and when he got their letter, he realized, no, it had to be done, because these people recognized their guilt, and they felt guilty, and it did something. They didn't become like Judas. They became like Peter. Look at verse 8. For even if I made you sorry with my letter, even if I made you feel guilty, I made you feel bad with my letter, I do not regret it. Although I did regret it. He says, after I said that, I thought, man, I should never have sent that letter. I'll lose most of the church over that. Maybe I corrected him too much. He says, though I did regret it, for I perceive that the same epistle made you sorry, but only for a while. Their guilt feelings didn't become obsessive because something happened. Now I rejoice, Paul says in verse 9. Not that you were made sorry. He says, not because I made you feel bad. You needed to feel bad, but I don't rejoice because I liked hurting you. He says, I rejoice because your sorrow led to repentance. It led to getting on their knees before God and saying, I need to be forgiven and please apply Christ for me. Restore me into a relationship with you and help me to stop sinning. Help me to be what I'm supposed to be. For you were made sorry in a godly manner that you might suffer loss from us with nothing. He said, this produced righteousness in you. There was a godliness that came from this sorrow that you went through. For godly sorrow produces repentance leading to salvation. Not to be regretted, but the sorrow of the world produces death. Guilty feelings that don't lead us to God and repentance produces death. Because you either end up shameless, not feeling guilty about anything, or feeling guilty in an obsessive way that just makes you mentally ill, emotionally sick. That's the only two directions we can go in. We either get numb to guilt, or we become overwhelmed with guilt.

Either one could drive us to do all kinds of horrible things.

I can remember many, many years ago, dealing with a person who had a sexual encounter.

Basically, it really forced upon her. She didn't tell anybody and felt so guilty about it that she ended up just going out and being with any guy that was out there. I'm already worthless. I feel shame. What does it matter?

Until she actually tried to commit suicide. We were able to actually open up, as I said, and talk to her, actually open up what the real issue was. Why would God forgive me so it doesn't matter? That's shame. Overwhelming. Yet, every day, all she felt was guilt and shame. Then there's the other person that says, you know what? Who cares? I don't care anymore. They do the same actions. Both cases deal and end up with the person doing the same actions.

But both are coming from what is shamelessness and what is overwhelming shame.

Both are destructive, aren't they? He says, the sorrow of the world leads to death.

For observe this very thing, verse 11, that you sorrowed in a godly manner, like diligence it produced of you. Look what happened. They didn't just go try to give the money back and hang themselves. Change took place in their lives. The guilty feelings drove them to God, and they changed.

If you feel guilty and you do not change, in order... there's only two directions you can go in. Shamelessness or obsessive shame. There's only two ways to go.

Both are emotionally, mentally, and spiritually sick.

Shamelessness?

Shamelessness or just obsessive shame?

Both lead to the same thing, lawless lifestyles.

He just lived lawlessness.

Here's what happened when these people responded. Their guilty feelings drove them. We are guilty, so let's repent and then stop being guilty.

He says, what diligence it produced in you, what clearing of yourselves, what indignation, what fear, what vehement desire, what zeal, what vindication. And all things, you prove yourselves to be clear of this matter. Verse 11 is an entire sermon in itself.

Study that.

During the days of 11th bread, it's a bad time to maybe study that verse. It is an entire sermon in itself. This is what it produced in these people. What they accepted, I am guilty and I feel guilty, and I need to go to God and have my account made zero, and then I need to deal with my sin.

I need to throw out the leavening. I need to get rid of it. Sometimes what we would is to keep the leavening, but feel unleavened. And you can't.

We can't feel unleavened and be leavened.

David is another incredible example of this. I won't go there, but Psalm 32, he talks about the joy of being forgiven.

Psalm 32 is fascinating. The joy, I am zero. My account is zero before God, and I'm blessed because of that. And when a person really gets that, they just want to thank God. They go to God and say, whatever you want from me, I will do. See, if you don't think your account is zero, you'd never really understand that. When you understand your account is zero, and you couldn't do that, and you don't deserve it, all of a sudden it's like, God, what can I do for you? How do I worship you? How do I serve you? Because you did for me what I could not do. You made my account zero.

To the blood of Jesus Christ, it was a horrible penalty. It was a horrible price to be paid to make your account zero, because God isn't just going to wipe away sin. And say, oh, it's okay. Sin's okay. No, it's not.

So Christ paid that price for you and me. Why? Why would He do that? To say, well, I made your account zero, except that thing you did in 1987.

That one I didn't wipe out. You know, that incident in 2005, I didn't wipe that one out either. All the rest of them I wiped out. Those two I didn't. So you're going to have to go to the lake afar.

It's either zero or it's not zero. You're either cleansed or you're not cleansed. One of the things the foot washing reminds us of, we still collect a little dirt throughout the years, doesn't it?

But we have to go back to ground zero, which is what Passover does.

It takes us right back, strips everything else off, and brings us back to this ground zero. This is it, folks. This is where you started.

Without this, nothing else will work.

Nothing else will work.

Look at Hebrews. The switch gear is just a little bit here. Hebrews 5.

It would be a lot easier if you and I simply now can learn God's way, and all of our feelings of guilt would be based on, you know, it's easy. I stole, I should feel guilty. I lied, I should feel guilty. But we have a messed up conscience where you will feel guilty about, you know, the old jokes of the mother that makes her children feel guilty about, oh, you only called me three times yesterday. You should have called me six.

Oh, you know, I'm here by myself. Here's all kinds of jokes about the mother, who makes the children feel guilty, even though the children are doing lots of things. And, you know, there are people that will make you feel guilty because they want you to do something for them, and they'll make you feel guilty. And sometimes that's not healthy for you, that's not healthy for the person. Right? You know, if your neighbor is always making you feel guilty, so you have to go over and clean their house, and you mow their lawn for them, and they do...

After a while, it's like, well, wait a minute. That's not good for you or me for this. But they're making you feel guilty. Right? See, our conscience is deciding what we should feel guilty over and not feel guilty over is not easy. We have to think this through, and we have to pray about it, and we have to study the Word of God. If you're not studying the Word of God, your conscience will not be developed properly. And a lot of times, the development of your conscience is a direct relationship to what you're taking out of the Scripture.

It has to do with your internal belief system and your emotions and your thought processes. So this is what it says here in Hebrews 5, verse 12. Now, what's amazing, by the way, we'll feel guilty because our neighbor makes us feel guilty because it's something we learned in our childhood. But we won't feel guilty because we cheated on our income tax, which is stealing.

We won't feel guilty because, ah, yeah, I know, I had this smoking problem, and I've had it for years. We won't feel guilty because, you know, we just have this disregard for the Sabbath. I know, but it's only, you know, I'm only working four hours.

Or I know, I know that there's a command and assembly on the Sabbath, but I only go once a month because I'm tired. We really have warped consciences. What it says here in verse 12, for though by this time, he's talking to Jewish Christians here, the Hebrews, Jewish Christians who grew up, there might be proselytes mixed in here, but for most of them, they would have grown up learning about God. They'd grown up with the Scriptures. You know, here's all these jetzels coming into the church. You know what? You Jews should be able to help them along, and you can't.

He says, for though by this time you ought to be teachers, you need someone to teach you again the first principles of the oracles of God, and you have come to need milk, not solid food. For everyone who protects only of milk is unskilled in the word of righteousness, for he is a babe. But solid food belongs to those who are of full age or mature, that is those who by reason of use have their senses exercised to discern both good and evil. By reason, the develop of consciousness or conscience is because we reason through God's way all the time. What does God want us to do?

What does the Scriptures say? How should I do this? We talk this over with other Christians. What do you think I should do? How do you think I should do this? We go to the Scripture. We go to the elders. We're constantly being exercised so that we know what to feel guilty over, and we do feel guilt. And we should feel guilty over, and we don't feel guilt. And when we do feel guilty, it motivates us to repent. Repentance is a lifestyle.

It's not a one-dive thing you do in your life. It's a lifestyle. And the more sensitive your conscience becomes, the more sensitive you become to the way you've gone. How much do we do? Two, three days a week. We just go through the days, through the motions, go to work, go home, work at our yards, watch TV. We're not praying. We're not studying. We're not discussing these things with others. And what we end up doing is we end up just with a conscience that isn't working right. So we find ourselves doing something that we shouldn't do.

And we wonder how we got there. Well, your conscience should have told you not to go there. It did. You just didn't hear it. Because if you have got spirit, it's telling you. You just don't hear it. So let's look at conscience for a minute. That's how I want to finish this up. Really, when we look at the Scripture, there's three kinds of conscience that it talks about. One is sort of a natural, uneducated conscience.

This is the way most people are. There are some people you'll find that are very good. They have a conscience that maybe their parents developed in them. They don't steal, they don't lie, they don't cheat. But they're very sensitive to certain things in their conscience.

There's just a natural conscience that's formed in human beings because of our backgrounds. And sometimes it can be good. It's not a complete conscience. It's not one that's totally dedicated to God. But it's good. You see other people that their conscience is a lot more evil. But all human beings have a conscience that's a mixture of good and evil.

Adolf Hitler was about as evil as you could be. Adolf Hitler loved little children as long as they were German. Is that odd? To how a conscience could be. He loved little children. I saw something the other day. The last film of Adolf Hitler's life. He came up out of the bunker and they had a bunch of little 13, 14, 15-year-old boys that they had taught to fire at Panzerfaust.

Panzerfaust was like a little bazooka. And these kids knocked out hundreds. They killed thousands of Russians. Of course, almost all of them got killed, too. They had about 15 little boys there. They would bring these little squads that they trained. And they're all standing there very proud. He's like a grandfather. He's touching their faces.

And what they had done, using computers, they figured out what he was saying to each one of them. And there was a young boy that survived out of that group. And he said what he said to him. It was exactly what the computer figured out what he said. And he was saying, you're such a fine young boy. You're such a good boy. And you're so wonderful. It's like a grandfather walking around talking to his children. And he's setting him out to die. What a weird conscience. Yet at that moment, he felt actual affection for these boys. It's obvious. And the boy said, I can feel it.

You can see it in his face. You can see it in the film. It's a weird conscience, right? That's the natural conscience that's out there. It's a mixture of good and evil. Sometimes it's really evil. Sometimes it can be pretty good. God wants us to be more than that. The second kind of conscience is what Timothy calls in 1 Timothy 4. And this is what is dangerous for us. We're called, by God, we have this natural conscience. A mixture of good and evil. But as we are called, it is very important we don't move into this state.

1 Timothy 4, verse 1. Now the Spirit expressly says that in latter times some will depart from the faith. It's not talking about the natural conscience of the world here. It's talking about the people of God. There will be, at the end time, and it was already starting at that time, people called by God, forgiven by God, chosen by God, who have received God's Spirit, who will depart.

How does that happen? How does a person depart? Depart from the faith, giving heed to deceiving spirits and doctrines of demons. How does a person do that? Speaking of lies and hypocrisy, having their own conscience seared with a hot iron. It's like taking a brand.

You know, you brand a cattle, and that literally scars the animal. But you look at a brand on an animal, what are you looking at? They took a hot iron and they scarred the animal. You're looking at a scar. And what he says here is that our conscience is like Satan takes a brand, and he scars us, and the conscience becomes scarred. He becomes hardened so that we do not respond to God.

There are times, Passover is a perfect time to do it. David told him around that time, the perfect time to do it, to go to God and say, Soften my heart and soften my conscience. Do not let it be hard, and do not let it be scarred. Because if our conscience becomes scarred enough, we will leave the faith. We'll leave it. And we'll go back out into the world, and we'll become what we used to be. We will become what we used to be. The third is the conscience that's developed by God. And the whole idea of conscience, of course, is that's another sermon in itself.

Maybe I'll do one on that sometime the next year. But let's go to Hebrews 9. Hebrews 9. So, feelings of guilt. You're dealing with feelings of guilt that have to do with your past sins. You're dealing with feelings of guilt that have to do with your presence. You're dealing with feelings of guilt that have to do nothing with sin at all. But because your family told you you were stupid, you've actually caused yourself to fail.

Ever seen people do that? They caused themselves to fail. If you're a teacher, you probably see it all the time. Children will cause themselves to fail because of what they've been told. You'll never be anything. You're nothing. Eventually they believe it. Satan's told you you're nothing. God's told you that's not true. What it says here, starting in verse 11, is very profound. But Christ came as I preached with the good things to come, which the greater, more perfect tabernacle, though it made him with hands, that is not of this creation.

He's in the tabernacle of God. He's in the temple of God in heaven. Now with the blood of goats and calves, that's why we don't slay a lamb for this Passover, but with his own blood he enters the most holy place once for all, having obtained eternal redemption. For if the blood of bulls and goats and the ashes of a heifer sprinkling the unclean, sanctifies for the purifying of the flesh, in other words, these things, the people were allowed under the Old Covenant to have a relationship with God.

They were promised eternal salvation by the killing of lambs and heifers. How much more shall the blood of Christ, who through the eternal Spirit offered himself without spot to God, notice what it says, cleanse your conscience from dead works to serve the living God. This isn't just the fact that your account is zero. This is about your conscience being cleansed. This is about you learning to give up, feeling guilty over the past, and living for the living God now.

As long as you live under the shackles of the feeling guilty over the past, you will never live totally for God now. You will always live in the past. And you will probably commit the same sins over and over and over again. You'll be stuck in your past. We have to go ask God not only to apply the sacrifice of Jesus Christ to make our account zero, but to cleanse the conscience, to cleanse the emotions, so that we will feel guilty when we're supposed to.

But that guilt will drive us to repentance. And guess what happens when you repent? The guilt is wiped out, and the conscience is cleared. The conscience is cleared so that you live now for God. Right now, everything. You live for God because your conscience isn't about the past. It is about, what am I doing right now? Today. My conscience is about right now. Today. Past is zero. God makes that past zero. Every time we go before Him.

But you and I live with a very messed up conscience. We keep this Passover to celebrate God's love and mercy for us. And what He does for us, and what He has done for us. We cannot allow the pre-conversion ideas of guilt to drive us to our guilty feelings. We must accept the permanent record zero. You must accept, though, that you're still messed up, and you and I still suffer the consequences of resenting it in this life. But you and I must accept that we can have our conscience cleansed.

At this Passover season, I encourage all of you to ask God to cleanse your conscience and show you what that means. Now, as He cleans your conscience, by the way, you may find yourself feeling very guilty. Because as He cleanses your conscience, you might say, Oh my, I'm doing things wrong. You know, a cleansed conscience doesn't mean, oh, all feelings of guilt are gone.

A cleansed conscience means, if you've been forgiven of the past, He wipes that out. But you actually become more sensitive as to what you're doing right now. A cleansed conscience is very sensitive to today and how you're obeying God. Ask God for help. Ask God to give you this Holy Day season, this Passover and the Days of the 11 Bread, because the whole season ties together to teach us all these lessons.

Ask God to please remove your guilt and to please help you to pledge your conscience, to create in you a clean conscience, so that you can give up the feelings of guilt that you need to give up. And the feelings of guilt that are caused by a cleansed conscience will motivate you to repent and be restored back into a relationship with God, back where the guilt is gone.