Respectable Rebellion

[Myers] Happy Sabbath, everyone! Thank you, Kinsey! Very familiar words, but what a beautiful song! Really appreciate you sharing your talents with us, praising God, worshiping Him, and certainly helping us to be edified as well. What a blessing it is! Obviously, she can walk and chew gum at the same time. She plays and sings, and I really appreciate that. Thank you very much for the special music

If someone were to ask you, how are you doing today? You probably wouldn't say, I'm spiritually unhealthy. Probably not. You'd probably say something like, well, I'm doing pretty well, considering the people I have to work with. Maybe something like that. Maybe you'd think that. Maybe you wouldn't verbalize that

But considering that, you might say, well, I attend services. I try to do what's right. On paper, I look pretty good. And if spirituality was a checklist, well, how would you be feeling right now? Maybe most of us would say, huh, I'm feeling okay. But have you ever considered that this could be called respectable rebellion?

Scripture says that some of the most spiritually dangerous sins aren't those headline sins that you may think of, but maybe things that most people don't see, that go unnoticed to the vast majority. But ultimately, it's a destructive pattern that can shape our heart, and it can begin to reflect what's really underneath the surface. Complaining. Cynicism. An accusatory spirit

Those things might not be shouted. They might not be the headliners. They're kind of muttered. They're typed. They're shared privately. And sometimes we just dismiss them. Oh, they're just venting. In fact, I think we don't call that complaining anymore, do we? We call it processing. I'm processing right now. Maybe we say, I'm just being honest. Is that what comes to mind? Or maybe my personal favorite? I'm not complaining. I'm just stating the facts. Respectable rebellion

Think about that for a moment. Scripture tells us these are hazardous things. Things that certainly point us in the wrong spiritual direction. Think about our calling for just a moment. When we think about what we're called to be, we're to be like Christ. And of course, we're told to silence the murmurs, crush the complaints, abandon those accusations, and ultimately refuse respectable rebellion. And when we do, that opens the door for the light of Christ to shine through

You see, the world we live in contributes to our thinking when it comes to these kinds of things. In a sense, I think they cause us to consider that, well, they're not that bad. In fact, kind of reasonable when you really get down to think about it, because I'm justified in the way that I'm thinking. Because ultimately, when you think of these things—complaining and cynicism and having an accusatory spirit—they thrive. They thrive, I think, because of the world that we live in

We have stressful lives. If you had to define what your week was like this past week, is there a word that comes to mind? Maybe hectic? Busy? Overworked? Does stress come to mind? Well, that's the kind of world we live in. We've got financial responsibilities. We've got job responsibilities. We've got financial difficulties. We've got the challenges of our relationships. I've got to serve at church. I've got a limited amount of time. I can hardly get enough sleep. And when you think about those things, there's just constant information and notifications that are coming at us all the time

Now, in that kind of a world, negativity becomes normal. When you think about that, well, even maybe more than normal—maybe it becomes contagious. Because what we repeatedly think and what we repeatedly say shapes what we believe. And what we believe shapes how we live. Imagine if your private words somehow became visible to all. What would that say? What direction in our thinking would that actually reveal?

As we consider that, think about this aspect of complaining. We're all guilty. We're all guilty of that. And as we do, does any kind of a check engine light come on when we do? I think it should. If we're complaining and murmuring, there should be a spiritual check engine light that pops on. Because God's Word does not treat that as trivial. Yet sometimes I think, yeah, it's not that big a deal. Everybody does it, right? Everybody whines and complains

But complaining is not just an emotional expression. Murmuring is a heart issue. It's a reflection of a heart that's resistant to God's way. And it's not just expressing a difficulty, not just expressing a concern. It's really voicing dissatisfaction without faith. Where's the faith in that? Because when you get down to it, it's showing what my heart is really reflecting. In a sense, I'm saying I'm not real happy or I'm not really comfortable with what God is allowing in my life right now

Have you ever thought about it that way? If I'm whining about something, do I recognize that God is actually allowing this situation, this difficulty, this trial to happen in my life? Think about maybe the most often cited example in the Bible when it comes to this. Who is it? Israel. They had it all, didn't they? They walked away from Egypt. They walked away from Pharaoh. They had been delivered. The Red Sea opened. They saw the miracles. God provided for them over and over and over again

And finally, they come right up to the edge of the Promised Land. And what happened next? Better send in some spies to check out what's going on there, right? And they came back with this amazing report that God has fulfilled His promises and we can go in and take the land. No, they didn't do that, did they?

Go over to Numbers 14. We see the results of the report of the spies. They came back and said, we're in trouble, guys. We are in deep trouble. There are giants in the land, and there's no way—no way—we're going to be able to enter the land. Well, the people bought that report. They bought that report. Numbers 14, verse 1, gives us their reaction to that very report:

“So all the congregation lifted up their voices and cried, and the people wept that night. And all the children of Israel complained against Moses and Aaron, and the whole congregation said to them, ‘If only we had died in the land of Egypt! Or if only we had died in this wilderness! Why has the Lord brought us to this land to fall by the sword, that our wives and children should become victims? Would it not be better for us to return to Egypt?’ So they said to one another, ‘Let us select a leader and return to Egypt.’” (Numbers 14:1-4)

Familiar story. But did you catch a couple of the lesser-noted details here in this story? This isn't just fear. This isn't just whining. This escalated into organized rebellion. They were going to appoint a new leader. God's not good enough, so let's choose our own. They were rejecting the promises of God. God had promised them that He would fight their battles for them. And He had all the way there. But now, forget it. We're on our own. We'll take it into our own hands

And it escalated to the point of slavery is better? Slavery is better than freedom? And ultimately, God judges it very severely because they accused God. Did you notice that? They accused God of evil intent. Why did He bring us here to fall by the sword? They were blaming God. So they weren't just questioning His plan. They questioned His character. They questioned the character of God

And when life got tough, got a little uncomfortable, well, that's when the complaints rose, and they even rewrote history. You see the revisionist history here? Now they're accusing God. And their complaining is what led to the rewrite. It led to rewriting their memory of the past. And it was distorted. A total distortion of the reality of what slavery was like in Egypt. And so God’s response? We see it a number of times throughout the Old Testament as He dealt with Israel

Numbers 11:1 says, “He was greatly displeased.” It displeased the Lord. That’s an understatement. Numbers 11:10 says, “It angered God greatly.” Greatly. His anger was greatly aroused. Yeah, God was definitely not pleased. And it’s sobering

Think of it this way. Does God say, you know, I get it. I get it. They were just stressed. They didn’t expect to see these giants. And you know, that’s okay? He doesn’t. No. He says, this is unacceptable. This is unacceptable because complaining isn’t harmless. It really reveals what’s inside. It reveals your heart. And it matters because God’s not just listening to the words they’re saying. He’s discerning attitudes

And so complaining, in reality, says, God, You’re not handling this well. See, it reverses everything. And so when we recognize that, we can get to the heart of the matter. Many times we’ll talk about 1 Corinthians 10:10. That’s where Paul writes about ancient Israel, and he says their experiences were for our example. And he says, don’t complain like they complained, because ultimately it leads to destruction

So it’s not just ancient history, in other words. He’s saying this applies directly to us today. So how much do I just excuse complaining because, man, I had a tough week. This is rough. I had to go through all these difficulties. Do you realize what I’m going through right now? I should be allowed to complain, right? Well, that’s what our world says. And I think it leads us to an interesting concept, and that’s this: complaining feels normal. Complaining feels normal, doesn’t it?

I mean, you think of the stress and the pressures we’re under. Maybe some of you thought of the word busy to describe your week. There are so many things going on. We’ve got the deadlines that we’re supposed to meet. We’ve got our family responsibilities. We’re overbooked on all the activities we’re supposed to be about. And we’ve got the challenges of just living life, emotional strain, and relationships

And in that kind of environment, complaining can feel—okay—justified. So pressure seems to contribute to making it feel reasonable. And as you consider being tired, not getting enough sleep, I think it causes our spiritual guardrails to go down. And we can easily misinterpret things. We don’t see the truth for what it really is. And then our attitude gets out of line, and it goes unchecked

And that murmuring, that whining, that complaining reveals something deeper. There’s a deeper issue. Because ultimately, are we recognizing God’s in charge? Or are we tipping toward those Israelites? What about God’s power? What about His dominion? What about His superiority? What about His promises to us? What about His power?

When we complain, we question God. Where does our trust really lie? Does it lie in our circumstances? Because if everything’s great, hey, wonderful. Trust God fully. Is that where our confidence is—in our situation, in our circumstances? Or is our trust truly in God? If it’s not, we can become, I think, even more than just critical. We can become cynical. And it takes it, in a sense, to the next level. We can become sarcastic

So not just whining and complaining. Cynicism is grumbling with a better vocabulary. You can think of it in those ways. Cynicism is grumbling with a better vocabulary. Cynicism sounds a little smarter, doesn’t it? Sounds a little bit more intelligent. Because complaining would say, ah, that’s bad. This is awful. Cynicism says, yeah, I expected this

Now, once again, cynicism doesn’t usually start as rebellion. I think many times it’s protecting ourselves. We want to self-protect, and it may grow out of disappointment. This didn’t turn out the way I wanted. Maybe even our prayers weren’t answered the way I had hoped. Or you know those leaders? They let us down. Or maybe it’s a setback. I didn’t expect this to happen in my life. Or it could even be something that happens at church—an experience at church—and it wounded me. It was supposed to heal me. It was supposed to be better

And so we become cynical. And you know, it seems reasonable. It says, yeah, I’ve been disappointed before. Or I’ve seen this pattern. Yeah, I know how people really are. It says things like, I’m not going to be naive. Not going to go that way. I’m just being realistic. I’ve been mistreated. People, they’ve always got an agenda

And that kind of thinking invades our minds. And we convince ourselves that that kind of perspective somehow will protect us or keep us safe. But the real danger is that that protective idea really becomes a poison, because it infiltrates us. And we sometimes kid ourselves, saying cynicism and that kind of an attitude—we might say, well, I’m just using discernment. Just discerning things. They’re not the same

Step back for just a minute. There’s a big difference between being cynical and being discerning. Discernment is striving to find the truth. It’s trying to find the truth, and usually with humility. But what about cynicism? It already knows. It assumes the worst without any evidence. It’s going to go that direction. Discernment asks, what’s really going on here? What’s happening here?

What does cynicism say? I already know how that ends. Yep, I’ve seen it before. Discernment stays open to see how God may deal with things. Cynicism slams that door shut before God can even knock. And you know, the tragedy of all of this is that it’s not just judging others. Sometimes we put it in that category. No, it’s not just that. It’s reshaping your heart. It’s reshaping your thinking

So it replaces patience with suspicion. It alters mercy into sarcasm. And it changes hope into just give up. Just resign. Over time, we filter everything through it. We interpret things that way, and they’re interpreted negatively. So sermons are critiqued before they’re even heard. Motives are questioned before the fruit is seen. And unity—unity goes out the door because of this internal chatter

James 5 hits this head-on. If you turn with me over to James 5, verse 9—pretty straightforward direction from the Apostle James. He doesn’t mince any words. He just hits it head-on. Notice how James instructs us to deal with this kind of an attitude. James 5, verse 9:

“Do not grumble against one another, brethren, lest you be condemned. (James 5:9)

Wow. That sounds just like Israel, doesn’t it? Yeah—for our example. Don’t do that. Don’t follow their example. “Behold, the Judge is standing at the door.” Now, James isn't describing blatant, open rebellion. I mean, it doesn't seem that way. He's warning about what's inside—internal grumbling. It's interesting. This word for grumbling really connects to sighing and groaning. “He's got to be kidding me.” And that kind of an attitude erodes relationships and trust

So it should cause us to ask ourselves, do I assume motives before I see the results? I mean, I’m disappointed, and that attitude of, this isn't going to work out—I’ve been so disappointed—rather than making me cautious, it’s made me cold. Am I one to extend grace reluctantly and then suspicion quickly?

See, that’s a reflection of this cynicism. And it spreads beyond just disappointment, and it takes it to a whole other level. And one of the most difficult things is this: it seems that nowhere does that reshaping of the heart and the mind through cynicism and negativity happen more quietly, more often, and maybe more dangerously than in our homes

At home. What happens at home? Think about that. Often, the most influential moments in life in our families don’t necessarily happen in serious conversations. They happen at the kitchen table. They happen not during deep discussions, but in passing comments. A tone. A facial expression. A sigh when somebody comes into the room. A look that says much more than just words

Well, what’s it like? Think of a normal evening. It’s been a week. Everybody’s tired. Dinner’s late. Homework’s not finished. The house could be either loud or kind of uncomfortably quiet. And then someone says something small. “Never mind. I guess I’ll have to do it again. I should have known.”

Those things aren’t really explosive. It’s not some bomb that got dropped. It’s not particularly openly hostile. Familiar? Maybe. And you see, over time, those comments accumulate. And what happens? The atmosphere changes. Instead of being warm, it gives way to tension. Conversations get shorter. Things get heavier

And slowly, without necessarily intending it, our kitchen table doesn’t seem so safe anymore. That’s how cynicism—how quiet accusation—often just gets right inside our families. Maybe it’s not blatant anger. Maybe it’s tone. Maybe it’s not open rebellion, but these subtle traces of the weight and the heaviness, the fatigue of life that we allow to affect everything around us. And then we excuse it because, well, I’m tired. You know the kind of week I had?

But what does God tell us? Don’t grumble. Don’t grumble against one another. And that includes the people sitting at our own kitchen table. Because it’s not just expressing frustration. That kind of attitude is training our mind and our heart how to interpret others. How do we interpret others? What do we think when we see people do things? What assumptions do we make?

Once assumptions replace questions, what happens to understanding? It’s gone. It quietly disappears. At first, it doesn’t seem like that big a deal because, you know, I excuse myself. They know that I love them. They shouldn’t take that so hard. Or, I’m just being honest. Or, I really didn’t mean anything by it. But honesty without mercy doesn’t build trust. And familiarity without restraint erodes real love. So that frustration—we’re like the Israelites—it hardens into stories that we tell ourselves. We rewrite history

“Well, they never listen.”
 “They don’t follow through.”
 “They always forget.”
 “That’s just how they are.”

And that cynicism seeps in. It settles down. And it wants to stay. It doesn’t want to leave. It wants to stay permanently. Families don’t change through dramatic speeches. It doesn’t happen that way. They change through small, intentional choices. Those choices that we make. And when we’re faithful in a little, it makes all the difference in the world

How about choosing to pause instead of react? How about asking instead of accusing? What about a soft answer, a gentle word, instead of a pointed remark? Sometimes the most spiritual thing that we can do is not to correct. It’s to extend grace. And when we extend grace, it doesn’t allow cynicism to stay. Because cynicism is not going to stay quiet. Over time, it develops further and takes it to another level

And that’s an accusatory spirit. That’s when cynicism gets an identity—the identity of accusation. That’s not just complaining. That’s not just being cynical about circumstances. And it doesn’t just doubt people’s motives. How does an accusatory spirit work? That spirit of accusation? Well, you’ve already figured it out

You’re not just complaining. You’re not just doubting. You’ve already assigned blame. You’re assuming guilt. You’re keeping a record of wrongs. And that accusatory spirit has an excellent memory for everyone else’s mistakes—for whatever everyone else does that’s wrong. And that becomes a horrible habit. You can trace its origin. Go to Revelation 12, verse 10. It tells us the origins of this kind of an approach to life

“Then I heard a loud voice saying in heaven, ‘Now salvation, and strength, and the kingdom of our God, and the power of His Christ have come, for the accuser of our brethren, who accused them before our God day and night, has been cast down.’” (Revelation 12:10)

It’s very clear. This is not Christ’s role. Christ intercedes. He extends us grace. But Satan is the accuser. And accusation, when we allow that to infiltrate our thinking, can become a habit. We stop reflecting the light of Christ and start echoing the accuser of the brethren. And that doesn’t just start with some kind of evil speech. It’s an inner judgment. Something going on inside. A condemnation that assumes intent. We put a motive on someone before we even know what’s true. There’s a biblical example of this in 3 John. Go over to 3 John, verse 9. Here we see an example in God’s Church

3 John, verse 3, it shows the impact of an accusatory spirit. 3 John, verse 3, the apostle John, the apostle of love, the one who is probably in his 90s when he writes this, the one who was with Christ, the one who wrote the gospel of John. The gospel of John, we find he writes:

“Diotrephes, who loves to have the preeminence among them, does not receive us. Therefore, if I come, I will call to mind his deeds which he does, prating against us with malicious words.” (3 John 9-10)

John identifies the fruit of what Diotrephes was all about. Diotrephes was the accuser. And it was masking his pride. It was masking, probably, his insecurity and his desire to control. He loved to have the preeminence. John opposes this. God opposes it because it fractures unity. It undermines the very work of God. When we recognize this kind of an attitude—he’s talking about wicked accusations. That word “prating” really carries the idea of evil, malicious speech—done with intent

John calls him out. And in a way, he’s calling us all out. What are my words like? Are the words that I speak words that heal, or words that harden? Do they protect unity? Do they bring people together, or do they erode trust? The things that I assume about others—do my assumptions reflect mercy? Or suspicion?

These are things that God takes very seriously. We saw the example of the Israelites. He was angry with them. When we consider this, God doesn’t just want us to modify our behavior. Sometimes we fall into that kind of thinking—well, if I could just improve this, that would be great. God definitely wants us to change, but it’s not behavior modification, is it?

No. He wants to throw out our human nature. That’s what He wants from us. And He wants it replaced with the character of Christ. That’s not just a little modification. That’s a complete makeover. So we need the character of Christ. And when we recognize that, it should be reflected in what Micah 6, verse 8, talks about. It says, what does the Lord require of us? Well, Micah records for us to do justly, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with our God

“He has shown you, O man, what is good; and what does the Lord require of you but to do justly, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God?” (Micah 6:8)

And when you begin to think about that, complaining resists humility. Cynicism opposes love. Accusation replaces mercy with condemnation. So these are not just minor issues. God gets right down to the matter and says, this is a heart issue. This is an issue that’s there on the inside. And they’re issues that then determine our actions, the fruit that results from what we think and how we feel. And He says they’re incompatible. We can’t have the righteous judgment, the right perspective He wants us to have, when we have this kind of mindset

So what can I do? What can I do? Well, there are a number of things that God outlines for us to be able to battle these kinds of things that infiltrate our thinking. When we complain, when we’re cynical, when we begin to accuse others, we’ve got to step back. And first and foremost, begin with ourselves. Before we’re pointing the finger, look inward first

Ecclesiastes 7, verse 21, gives some guidance on this. Let’s notice what it says. Ecclesiastes 7, verse 21. We jump into the wisdom literature of the Bible. And this is kind of interesting, because I think it especially applies today in this crazy world that we live in—of social media and things that are posted online and things that people say about us, either directly or indirectly. Pretty amazing counsel that we’re given here in Ecclesiastes 7, verse 21:

“Do not take to heart everything people say,” Or the way my grandmother used to say it, you can’t believe everything you read in the newspaper. That was before computers, by the way.  “lest you hear your servant cursing you. For many times, also, your own heart has known that even you have cursed others.” (Ecclesiastes 7:21-22)

At first glance, it says, well, don’t overreact to what people say. All right, that’s a start. But there’s a deeper truth here. We’ve got the subtle dynamics of judgment—of our words, our speech, how we talk. And at the heart, we get right down to the core of who we are, if we break it down. Life is full of opinions, ideas, criticism, commentary. It’s all out there. If we treat every word as truth, how can you avoid resentment or anger? It’s right on our doorstep

Here, he’s reminding us that the right kind of speech—the right word—speaking truth in love, with discernment, filtering what is fact and what is opinion, recognizing what reflects someone else’s heart, not our own. And then what does he say? Be careful. Your own heart knows you’ve done the same thing. You’ve done the very same thing

Oftentimes, and this is phenomenal when you think about it, our judgments of others are often a reflection of what’s in our own heart—of who we are—and it’s just coming out. So before pointing out faults, God is calling us to ask, where have I judged improperly? Where have I spoken harshly? Where have I been unjust? Where have I accused others without even knowing what the truth really is?

Put this in a household context. You’ve got this tense household because one of the parents is laying down the law, speaking harshly to the children, and then realizing later, uh-oh, I’ve provoked them. I brought about a bad reaction. That can happen in the family. It can happen at work. It would never happen in the Church, would it? Yes, it can happen in the Church

We’re told the first step is to check our own heart. Check our own heart before getting into others, because cynicism and sarcasm and a quick judgment—initially, we might think, well, this is just wisdom. But wait a second. We’ve also cursed others

That’s a tough question to answer. Have I done that? Have I cursed others through sarcasm? Have I cursed others through gossip? Have I cursed others by accusation when I really don’t know the truth? Am I quick to assume a fault and slow to extend grace? Because it’s going to reveal who I really am. And if we have that kind of attitude, bitterness and cynicism are going to come to the surface

But Ecclesiastes is reminding us there’s a solution—if we examine ourselves first. If we speak from hearts that are aligned with God, then our perspective is just. Then our view is edifying. And our words become Christ-like. So Ecclesiastes is more than advice. This is a spiritual safeguard

Look inward first before speaking outwardly. Let your words flow from a godly heart that’s been purified by God, not allowing human nature to rear its ugly head. Now that leads us to a second thing that we can do. Recognize the fruit. Don’t judge the motives. Recognize the fruit, not the motives. Christ said very plainly, you will know them by their fruit. Matthew 7:16 is a good reminder of that

It’s interesting how Zechariah 8 also applies to this. Go to Zechariah 8, verse 16. We’re in the Minor Prophets. This is the time after Israel has returned out of exile. It was a tough time—very difficult. They were struggling. There was internal strife. There was mistrust. There was dishonesty. There were outside forces trying to annihilate Israel. All kinds of things going on. And here we find this God-given direction in Zechariah 8, verse 16:

“These are the things you shall do: Speak each man the truth to his neighbor; give judgment in your gates for truth, justice, and peace; let none of you think evil in your heart against your neighbor; and do not love a false oath. For all these are things that I hate,” says the Lord (Zechariah 8:16-17)

What does He emphasize? Behavior. Observable behavior. Speaking the truth. Judging rightly. Making peace. That’s rather than accusation, cynicism, or assuming motivation. The emphasis is on actions—on actions and words that can be measured—rather than just guessing intentions, rather than condemning and adopting that perspective. God is reminding us He’s the only one who really gets down to the heart and knows intentions. As human beings, we’re not equipped to fully discern someone else’s motivation

So our focus has to be the fruit—and ensuring that our actions reflect justice, our actions reflect mercy, our actions reflect truth. These are daily issues we have to deal with. You’re on the job or at school. Or maybe you’re right here at church, and someone’s actions are frustrating. They’re irritating. They’re confusing. What in the world are they doing? You can spend hours trying to figure out, why did they do that? Why did they act that way? What’s the deal with that?

And we can assume some kind of wrong motivation—that they’re selfish, that they’ve got some hidden agenda. We can come up with all these things. And when you get right down to it, we’re probably totally wrong. We don’t know. But we can feel pretty confident. Yeah, I’m sure that’s why they did that. That’s the danger

So instead of assuming motives, God tells us: look at the fruit. Focus on truth. Speak truth. Render judgments that make for peace. Don’t devise evil in your heart. Because when we do that, we guard our heart from slipping into respectable rebellion—and we begin reflecting the character of Christ instead

It says, what does the Lord require of us? Well, Micah records for us to do justly, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with our God. And when you begin to think about that, complaining resists humility. Cynicism opposes love. Accusation replaces mercy with condemnation. And so these are not just minor issues. God gets right down to the matter and says, this is a heart issue. This is an issue that's there on the inside

And they're issues that then determine our actions, the fruit that would result from what we think and how we feel. And He says they're incompatible. We can't have the righteous judgment, the right perspective He wants us to have, when we have this kind of mindset

So what can I do? What can I do? Well, there's a number of things that God outlines for us to be able to battle these kinds of things that infiltrate our thinking. When we complain, when we're cynical, when we begin to accuse others, we've got to step back. And first and foremost, begin with ourselves. Before we are pointing the finger, look inward first

Ecclesiastes 7, verse 21 gives some guidance on this. Let's notice what it says. Ecclesiastes 7, verse 21. We've got a jump into the wisdom literature of the Bible. And this is kind of interesting, because I think it especially applies today in this crazy world that we live in, of social media and things that are posted online and things that people could say about us either directly or indirectly. Pretty amazing counsel that we're given here in Ecclesiastes 7, verse 21. Notice what it says:

"Do not take seriously everything people say, lest you hear your servant curse you. For many times also, your own heart knows that you have cursed others" (Ecclesiastes 7:21-22)

Now, if you read that at first glance, it says, well, don't overreact to what people say. All right, that's a start. There's a deeper truth here, though. We've got the subtle dynamics of judgment, of our words, our speech, how we talk. And at the heart, we get right down to the core of who we are, if we break it down

Don't take seriously everything people say. Life is full of opinions, ideas, criticism, commentary. It's all out there. Treating every word as truth? Wow. How can you avoid resentment or anger? When we think about that, it's right on our doorstep. Here he's reminding us that the right kind of speech, the right word, speaking truth in love with discernment, that's filtering what is fact and what is opinion. It reflects someone else's heart, not our own

And when you think about that, what does he say? Be careful. He says your own heart knows you've done the same thing. You've done the very same thing. And so oftentimes—this is phenomenal when you think of it—our judgments of others are often a reflection of what's in our own heart, of who we are, and it's just coming out

So before pointing out faults, you see God's calling us to ask, where have I judged improperly? Where have I spoken harshly? Where have I been unjust? Where have I accused others without even knowing what the truth really is?

Put this in a household context. All right, we've got this tense household because one of the parents is just laying down the law, speaking harshly to the children, and then realizing later, uh-oh, I've provoked them. And I brought about a bad reaction

Yeah, that can happen in the family. It can happen at work. It would never happen in the Church, would it? Yeah, it can happen in the Church. And we're told the first step is to check our own heart. Check our own heart before getting into others, because cynicism and sarcasm and a quick judgment—initially we could think, well, this is just a wise thing. But wait a second. We've also cursed others

And so that's a tough question to answer. Have I done that? Have I cursed others through sarcasm? Have I cursed others through gossip? Have I cursed others by accusation when I really don't know the truth? Am I quick to assume a fault and slow to extend grace?

Because it's going to reveal who I really am. And it allows, if we have that kind of an attitude, bitterness and cynicism to come to the surface. But Ecclesiastes is reminding us there's a solution if we examine ourselves first. If we speak from hearts that are aligned with God, then our perspective is just. Then our view is edifying. And our words then become Christ-like

So Ecclesiastes is more than advice. This is a spiritual safeguard. Look inward first before speaking outwardly. Let your words flow from a godly heart that's been purified by God, not allowing human nature to rear its ugly head. Now that leads us to a second thing that we can do. We can recognize the fruit. Don't judge the motives. Recognize the fruit, not the motives. Christ said very plainly, you will know them by the fruit

It's interesting how Zechariah chapter 8 also applies to this. Go to Zechariah 8, verse 16. Get to the Minor Prophets. And here in Zechariah it's interesting because this is the time after Israel has returned out of exile. And it was a tough time, very difficult time. They were struggling. There was internal strife. There was mistrust. There was dishonesty. There were outside sources that were trying to annihilate Israel. All kinds of things going on

And here we find this God-given direction in Zechariah 8, verse 16. God says:

"These are the things you should do: Speak the truth to one another. Render in your gates judgments that are true and make for peace. Do not devise evil in your hearts against one another and love no false oath. For all these things I hate, says the Lord" (Zechariah 8:16-17)

So what does He emphasize? Behavior. Observable behavior. Speaking the truth. Judging rightly. Making peace. That's rather than an accusation or cynicism or assuming some motivation. So the emphasis is on actions, on actions and words that can be measured, rather than just guessing intentions, rather than condemning and having that perspective

And so God's reminding us He's the only one that really gets down to the heart and knows our intentions. As human beings, we're not equipped to fully discern someone else's motivation

So our focus has to be the fruit, and ensuring then our actions reflect justice. Our actions reflect mercy. Our actions reflect truth. These are sometimes daily issues we have to deal with, because you're on the job or at school. Or maybe you're right here at church and someone's actions are frustrating, irritating, or confusing. What in the world are they doing?

You can spend hours trying to figure out, why did they do that? Why did they act that way? What's the deal with that? And we can assume some kind of wrong motivation, or they're selfish, or they've got some hidden agenda. And we can come up with all these things. And when you get right down to it, we're probably totally wrong. We don't know. But I can feel pretty confident—yeah, I'm sure that's why they did that

Well, here we're told, no. Follow the pattern God's outlined. God's outlined observable behavior. He says speak truth. Work toward restoration. Work toward peace. And when that's the case—when we don't assume someone else's motivation—problems can be corrected. The issues and relationships, they can be preserved. And your judgment then begins to align with God's way

So how much do I just speculate about why they did what they did? God says, don't go there. Don't go there. And so, on the other hand, it's a reminder of a third thing we need to do, is choose to believe the best. Choose to believe the best. Sounds easy, but sometimes it's really tough. James 4 is a great reminder of this admonition. James 4, verse 11. He tells us just that. James 4, giving us practical advice, probably a New Testament version of the Proverbs, giving us advice on how to live. And in James 4 he speaks to this issue we're talking about today. James 4, verse 11:

"Do not speak evil against one another, brethren. He who speaks against a brother or judges his brother speaks evil against the law and judges the law. But if you judge the law, you are not a doer of the law but a judge. There is only one Lawgiver and Judge, the One who is able to save and to destroy. But you, who are you to judge your neighbor?" (James 4:11)

And so James addresses accusation. He's addressing cynicism and complaining all at once. Don't speak evil against one another. And so that's reflecting assumptions, pointing to motivation that we don't know. Choosing the best, on the other hand, means we filter out those thoughts and we apply mercy and grace. And then we're avoiding that temptation to judge someone else's intentions

Because ultimately, what does James say? There's only one Lawgiver and Judge. We don't want to take on the job of judge. That's God's job. That ultimate judgment belongs to God. So we've got to face it. Do we really face the fact that I'm not equipped to discern someone else's heart? I just can't do it. I can't do it. So when I place a motivation on them—oh, that's why they did that?—well, I can't know that. And that's dangerous. And we're told it's ungodly

So if we choose the best, we avoid accusation. We avoid assuming negative motives. We're avoiding what leads to gossip. We're avoiding what leads to slander. We're avoiding what leads to broken relationships. And so if we believe the best, if we have God's mindset, we're reflecting His mercy rather than our own human suspicious nature

And that would contribute to humility then when we face it that way. And we stop elevating ourselves to being motive detectors, because we can't be. And instead, when we choose what James tells us, it aligns us with a Christ-like perspective of love. And believing the best flows from the love of God. Instead of choosing selfish intent, we're choosing to respond with mercy and grace and patience and encouragement

So I have to ask myself, how often do I speak in ways that condemn someone else's intentions? And of course, if we're going to move to the next level of the solution, not only do we choose to believe the best, but we move from criticism to care. We've got to care. In Isaiah 11, He gives us some direction here. How do we move from our critical human nature to godly concern and care? Well, with the power of God's Spirit, we can do this. Isaiah 11, verse 3 says:

"He shall not judge by the sight of His eyes, nor decide by the hearing of His ears" (Isaiah 11:3)

Now this particular passage is a messianic section of Scripture, so it's ultimately talking about Christ, the coming Messiah. Well, it's highlighting how He approaches judgment and how He approaches leadership. It says He shall not judge by what His eyes see. So He's not assuming motivation. He's not basing something on appearances. He's looking deeper beyond the superficial. He's looking past the outward expression

And it says He's not deciding by what His ears hear. He's not acting on gossip. Oh, I heard that. I'm sure that's what happened there. Yeah, I heard that too. No. Rumors? Out the door. Incomplete information? That's not how Christ is going to decide. That's not how He's going to judge. His decisions will be based on truth. They'll be based on a godly perspective and not some human speculation

So Isaiah is giving us a principle. When we see judgment—right judgment, true, godly judgment—it comes from an understanding heart and having the whole context, not just assuming things. So don't be tempted to do that, is what he's telling us. We've got to look beyond the appearance. God looks at the heart

And so believing the best and moving from being critical to really caring about others—what does that result in? Stronger relationships. Deeper unity where trust can grow. And misunderstandings are definitely going to be minimized

So I've got to ask myself, how often do I fall into the wrong way of thinking? How often do I judge on a rumor or an appearance or hearsay? How often do I actually give the benefit of the doubt? How often do I assume good intentions?

That's harder to do. It's easier to assume bad intentions. How often do I really reflect the kind of discernment that Christ wants me to and focus on encouragement rather than criticism? Isaiah is telling us, believing the best requires discernment, patience, humility. And so ultimately, we're challenged to choose the best way. Philippians 2, verse 14. Here's how we choose the best way. You want to put it into a nutshell? Philippians 2, verse 14 says:

"Do all things without complaining and disputing" (Philippians 2:14)

Do all things without complaining and disputing, that you may become blameless and harmless children of God without fault in the midst of a crooked and perverse generation, among whom you shine as lights in the world. And boy, are we here or not? Are we in the middle of a crooked and perverse generation? Yes

But what does God intend for us? To become blameless and harmless. And ultimately, among whom you shine as lights in the world. That's choosing the best way. Because this world that we live in is so saturated with outrage and sarcasm and suspicion. And God calls us to be different. Not naive. Not silent. But to be humble, to be grateful, to be discerning, to be merciful

He calls us to that. And when we silence the complaining, when we delete the cynicism, when we reject accusation, unity grows, relationships heal, faith is strengthened, and ultimately Christ is clearly seen. So when we recognize this, God calls us out of this crooked and perverse generation to something better. Yeah, we're human, and it's not about perfection. But it's certainly about putting on Christ. It's about progress

It's not about never saying a word, but about edifying speech. It's not about harsh judgment, but about Christ-like mercy. So if we lay down complaining, if we lay down cynicism, if we lay down accusation, and we take up thankfulness, if we take up mercy, if we take up humility, we will grow. And ultimately the Church will be strengthened. So we have a choice

We can silence the murmurs. We can crush the complaints. We can abandon any accusations. And we can refuse to let respectable rebellion live in our hearts any longer. And in a world that desperately needs a Savior, we can be the light of Christ, and that light can ultimately shine through us