What Is Biblical Modesty?

On the sixth day of creation, God made mankind in His image. After looking at everything that He made, He said it was indeed very good (Genesis 1:26-31). When He created Adam and Eve, they were naked and felt no shame (Genesis 2:25). Only after they sinned by eating of the tree God commanded them not to eat did they feel shame. They hid their nakedness by making coverings with fig leaves. Later, after they had been removed from the Garden of Eden, God showed them how to make clothing from skins to cover themselves (Genesis 3:7 and 3:21).

The Bible doesn’t give us the dimensions of their clothes or tell us exactly what was covered and how much of it. If modesty could be achieved simply with the right measurements, God would have given them; He doesn’t shy away from measuring when it is necessary. In fact, in the whole Bible, there is really not much on just how much of our bodies we are allowed to show, which begs the question, what exactly is Biblical modesty? Is Biblical modesty all about our appearance, or does it go deeper?

Modesty is Not Just for Girls

I should preface this by saying that, since I’m a woman, more of this article’s focus will be on women. However, gentlemen, you can still apply the principles of this writing, so don’t ignore this article because “it’s just for girls.” As men striving to be like Christ, principles of modesty are important for you as well. 

The majority of what we read about biblical modesty and handling our bodies is located in the New Testament. I believe this is due to the early Church living among the Greeks and Romans, who were deeply entrenched in sexual immorality and idolatry. They used their bodies not for God, but for pagan rituals and fulfilling lusts. Some converted Christians came from backgrounds like this (1 Corinthians 6:9-11). Today’s world is incredibly sexual and treats men and women as objects to fulfill each other’s lusts. The New Testament writings give practical advice about modesty that is applicable today. In the Old Testament, we read more about humility than modesty, but they go hand-in-hand. 

Attention Seeking and Pride

The first thing most people think of when they hear “modesty” is not showing much of your body, primarily for women. While apparel is an aspect of modesty (for both men and women), this is not the root of modesty. What clothing is considered modest is, and will always be, subjective since it will change as culture, era and status change. God simply does not give us a universal rule of what is modest and what is not. 

But modesty is bigger than just what we wear. Modesty is an outward display of humility—being free from vanity, pride or boastfulness about ourselves or about our abilities—and one of the ways we honor God with our bodies. When we are immodest in our dress, attitude or speech, we dishonor Him.

The world tells us we have a right to wear whatever we want, and that we should dress to feel empowered, confident, sexy and to love ourselves. This sounds fun and liberating! 

The Bible says: 

“Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, which you have from God? You are not your own; you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body” (1 Corinthians 6:19-20, Revised Standard Version). 

The world tells us we are free to do as we please with our bodies, but the Bible tells us we are not, nor should we want to be. Independence and freedom in the world really just mean that you are still a slave to sin, and therefore, you have no hope (Romans 6:18-23 and 2 Peter 2:19).

The world views it as a point of pride to have people lust after you. We can’t control other people’s desire, but as Christians we should do what we can to not be the object of someone’s lust, 

“Then let us no more pass judgment on one another, but rather decide never to put a stumbling block or hindrance in the way of a brother” (Romans 14:13, RSV) 

There is no shame in attraction, or in being attractive, but trying to make others lust after us, or being vain and proud of how attractive you are, is sinful and shameful. 

When I was a teenager, modesty was a challenge. I dressed like my friends did and got lots of compliments, and I loved that! It was easy to rationalize my clothing by comparing it to others who were wearing more revealing things, or I would buy something inappropriate and tell my mom I would wear a sweater over it, then conveniently “forget.” I would try to convince her to let me wear a bikini because it was “impossible” to find a cute but modest bathing suit, and I didn’t want to look like an old lady. I complained frequently about how hard it was to find anything both cute and modest, and I consistently picked cute over modest.

As I grew older, I saw younger girls mimic some of my behaviors, outfits and attitudes. This made me realize that I had been self-focused, not God-focused, in both my everyday life and even when coming before God at church services. I realized something as simple as an outfit could impede the good work God wanted to do in me because of the example I was setting for others. 

Instead, I started looking at women I admired and what they wore; women whose beauty came from their mind and their deeds, not just the clothes they wore. These women still looked fashionable, beautiful and put together. But more importantly, they were gracious, kind, humble and had the right priorities in life: God and family. There was a special elegance and light in them that I wanted to emulate. When I imagined the godly woman I wanted to be when I grew up, I saw her dressing differently than I had been. I asked myself, “Why would I imitate the fashion of people whom I didn’t want to be like when I grew up?”

My intent back then wasn’t to be sexually desired or have others envy me, but it also wasn’t to intentionally avoid those things either. Intent matters, and God cares about our hearts. But we need to be truly honest with ourselves about what that intent is, and the why behind it. 

Reflective Questions for Modesty in Humility and Attention:

• How much time do you spend getting ready every day compared to the time spent with God? 
• Do you justify wearing things considered less modest because they look nice? 
• Do you actively seek compliments on your physical appearance? 
• Do you consider modesty when you shop? 
• If you were the most modest one in the room, what would that room look like? 

Material Modesty

In 1 Timothy 2:9-10, we read some principles that apply to both men and women, 

“In like manner also, [let] the women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with propriety and moderation, not with braided hair or gold or pearls or costly clothing, but, which is proper for women professing godliness, with good works.” 

Braids and the pearls are not what is wrong here, but the habit of dressing ostentatiously and drawing attention to themselves. Both men and women can be guilty of this.

Homes, vacations, cars, clothes, bags, nails, shoes and food; the list can go on and on for ways that we spend our money. None of these things are bad either! God blesses people in many ways, one of which is material wealth. However, He wants to see if we use it only for ourselves, or if we will share it with others, 

“But whoever has this world’s goods, and sees his brother in need, and shuts up his heart from him, how does the love of God abide in him?” (1 John 3:17). 

It is not wrong to look nice or to live comfortably, but if we put those things above helping people who need it, it is wrong. If we ignore the needs of our neighbor but drive a brand-new car, maybe we have an issue in our hearts.

Material modesty is not about dressing in the cheapest clothes you can find, always driving an old car, or rolling out of bed and not caring about your appearance at all. It is about whether or not we glorify God with our material blessings.  Our presentation matters to God, and that includes both how we look and how we treat others. We should not be generous to appear righteous (Matthew 6:3-4), but because we have compassion for fellow humans. God seeks humble, modest and generous people, not conceited or worldly ones. 

Reflective Questions for Modesty in Wealth:

• Do you care a lot about the brand you are wearing? 
• Do you examine other people’s clothes and deem your own “better?” 
• How much money and time do you spend on your physical appearance? 
• Do you spend money and time on other people? 
• Are you generous and compassionate with people who have less than you?

Be Modest as Christ Is Modest

There are many other ways, as Christians, that we can behave modestly, but in general, conduct ourselves as if Christ were right next to us. If you think it’s okay to say something in front of all your friends but would feel like it’s wrong to say in front of Christ, consider why that is, and if you should still say it. Apply this principle to your virtual speech too; think carefully before you post or send something in the “public” of social media or in the “privacy” of personal messages and texts. Jesus Christ is your advocate, talking to the Father about you and defending you. Don’t make His job harder by saying things you shouldn’t! 

“My little children, I am writing these things to you so that you may not sin. But if anyone does sin, we have an advocate with the Father, Jesus Christ the righteous” (1 John 2:1, English Standard Version).

Specific ways we can behave modestly are building others up and being truly happy for other’s successes. When it is your time for success, share it with others who have helped you get to where you are; nothing we do is completely on our own in this world. Even if the people who helped you are strangers who put some helpful research together on the internet, share the spotlight. Another way is to ask people questions and talk about them, and when someone asks you a question, make sure to ask one in return and really listen to their answer. There are many other ways to practice modesty, but a very important one that is often overlooked as part of the discussion is swearing, profanity and crudeness. These things are not acceptable, not modest, and not Christ-like, no matter how common we see and hear them in the world. People weakly rely on these for humor, but it isn’t okay as “just a joke” either. Minding our mouth is probably one of the hardest, but most important things we can do as Christians (James 3:2).

Reflective Questions for Modesty in Actions:

• Do you put others down for a laugh? 
• Do you overshare your accomplishments to impress people? 
• Do you pretend you know things to avoid looking dumb? 
• Do you gossip? 
• Does your overall behavior guide people to Christ or push them away?

After reflecting on these questions, I know I still have plenty to work on, and I would be surprised if anyone reading doesn’t see something they can improve in their life. I hope that you take it to heart and talk about it with your friends to help each other improve as brothers and sisters in Christ. 

“As iron sharpens iron, so a man sharpens the countenance of his friend” (Proverbs 27:17). 

There are many more options now for clothing since we have online shopping and modesty-focused fashion influencers to help those who need a little inspiration. You can be modest and look great with more ease than ever before, so I urge you to take steps in that direction.

“Do not let your adornment be merely outward—arranging the hair, wearing gold, or putting on fine apparel—rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God” (1 Peter 3:3-4).

Modesty is not about how much skin you show—not that you shouldn’t consider that—but about your attitude and the deeper intentions behind what you do and say. When you start each day, as you get ready and put your appearance together, consider what you will think about and how you will talk to others. If there is an opportunity to put someone down for a big laugh, will you take it? Will you let your emotions rule you and lash out? Will you be patient and work hard? When you get ready each day, dress yourself in mercy and in kindness. Stand out from others not because of your clothing but because of God’s light and glory that shine through you.