Explosive Anger

Ever drive down the highway and witness a road rage incident? People swerving in and out, maybe cutting you off — or they didn't, they only imagined you did something they didn't like — and so they're giving you gestures, maybe the Hawaiian good luck sign or whatever, shouting at you, really giving you the what-for. Do we then say to ourselves, "Oh, there goes a particularly converted Christian"? Or do we have other thoughts in mind?

In Galatians 5:22–23 we read about the fruit of the Spirit: "But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. Against such there is no law." A lot of positive attributes.

Now let's imagine for a moment how different the world would be if everyone displayed that list — the love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control — and everywhere you looked, people were doing just that. How different life would be. How would it be in the family? In your neighborhood? At work or at school? How would it be when you're doing business with somebody and they aren't looking to take advantage of your weakness? People exhibiting the fruit of the Spirit would make special efforts to get along with each other.

Well, today I want to focus on two of the items listed under the fruit of the Spirit. In verse 22 there's the word "longsuffering" — in Strong's Concordance, that's G3115. The other word, in verse 23, is "self-control," and that's G1466 in Strong's.

The King James Version translates Strong's G3115 as "longsuffering" or "patience." If we take a look at the outline of biblical usage — how it's actually used — Strong's says: "patience, endurance, constancy, steadfastness, perseverance, forbearance, longsuffering, slowness in avenging wrongs." Ooh, it sounds like I'm going to get you for that. Well — maybe not.

King James then translates Strong's G1466 as "temperance." In the outline of biblical usage it's mostly rendered "self-control," being temperate — "a virtue of one who masters his desires and passions."

And so we have to go back a few verses in Galatians 5 to see what life is like without God's Holy Spirit — what people's passions are if they simply don't display the fruit of the Spirit. Starting in verse 19: "Now the works of the flesh are evident, which are: adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lewdness, idolatry, sorcery, hatred, contentions, jealousies, outbursts of wrath, selfish ambitions, dissensions, heresies, envy, murders, drunkenness, revelries, and the like; of which I tell you beforehand, just as I also told you in time past, that those who practice such things will not inherit the kingdom of God."

So we've got two lists — those exhibiting the fruit of God's Spirit, and those doing the opposite, the works of the flesh. Now, if society acted like Galatians 5:19–21, society would self-destruct. Family structure would break down, crime would be everywhere, people would suffer greatly, no one would be safe, and no one would trust one another. And if you go to certain parts of the world, they're already living that right now, as we speak. Pretty scary.

This is why God sets up limits for human behavior, and our respecting and understanding those limits has a positive result. God provided a positive structure for mankind when He set up the Ten Commandments as a foundational tool, that we might then enjoy the fruit of the Spirit outlined in Galatians 5:22–23.

So today I'm going to focus on those two items: verse 22, longsuffering, and verse 23, self-control. A title for today's message is "Explosive Anger." It seems to drive a lot of the world. It doesn't matter if you turn on the news or read a newspaper — we're going to see the results of that.

Now, I do want to say that not all anger is forbidden. Not all anger is bad. If we look elsewhere in the Bible, we understand that anger has three faces — it can be expressed in three different ways. There's explosive anger, blowing up; we've all seen it, maybe we've done it, certainly in the world around us. Then there's the anger that's stewing, brewing, or silent indignation — ever see somebody with a scowl on their face, like they want to put a dagger through your heart at the first opportunity? And third is irritability, or exasperation, or embitterment. Silent anger is just as offensive to God as explosive anger. So how do we express our anger? That's the question.

Anger can hurt relationships, and you choose who's on the receiving end of your expressed anger. Anger is a perceived threat to something you held valuable — in other words, there was a violation, in your mind, of something valuable. And the problem is, we can go a whole day at work just being nice to our co-workers, only to lose it at home with the people closest to us. We tend to take it out on the very ones we should be loving the most. So who's been on the receiving end of our anger?

Anger can also be a legitimate emotional response. In Ephesians 4:26 we read a verse I'm sure we've all heard before: "Be angry, and do not sin: do not let the sun go down on your wrath." Now, the Bible consistently warns that uncontrolled or sinful wrath leads to harm, both to oneself and to others. The biblical texts draw a clear line between righteous anger — which comports with God's holiness and justice — and sinful anger. Righteous anger defends truth and upholds justice when needed. However, righteous anger remains under self-control, and it doesn't violate love or God's standards. When Scripture speaks of God's wrath, it refers to God's reaction against sin. Mankind's sinful anger, on the other hand, arises out of selfishness, arrogance, and impatience.

James 1:19–20 illustrates this contrast between the two kinds of anger. Starting in verse 19: "Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak, slow to anger, for man's anger does not bring about the righteousness of God." The key word I want to emphasize is "slow" — slow to speak, slow to anger. When people get angry, they get impatient and lose self-control; that's when people act emotionally, and that's when we have to be particularly careful. And recall Galatians 5:21 — "those who practice such things will not inherit the kingdom of God." So there's a pretty important reason to pay attention to not having explosive anger.

Going back to those road rage incidents — most of us have probably seen one, and if not in person, then in a video. I have those on YouTube, road rage incidents. It brings to mind Proverbs 29:11: "A fool vents all his feelings, but a wise man holds them back." So if we slow down for a moment and ask ourselves, "What will be the outcome of my actions?" — because unchecked wrath leads to regret, discord, and social harm. Or do we ever later wish we had restrained ourselves and found better words and better responses when we were provoked? That's the regret of rash responses.

I can't help but think of some dash-cam videos I saw, where a guy stops, gets out of his vehicle, and he's going to hammer the car in front of him — really give him the what-for at a traffic light. And a number of those videos show it didn't work out well for the guy with the road rage. The guy in the car in front opens his door, whacks him, and drives off. Now he's laying in the road and never got to use his hammer or baseball bat. Just a lot of drama. It's exhibited in Proverbs 25:28: "Whoever has no rule over his own spirit is like a city broken down, without walls."

Now let's go back through the ages, particularly to the Middle Ages, when cities had walls around them. If you've been to the Feast in Estonia, there's a wall around the old city — maybe 30 feet high and 30 feet thick. People lived in that wall, but it was protection against raiders, with big gates on the ends to get into the medieval city. But what if there were no walls? They'd be open to being raided, killed, tortured, robbed — whatever. And that's what happens when somebody doesn't have self-control or rule over their own spirit. Explosive anger puts them at risk, just like a city would be at risk of annihilation. Explosive anger removes the protective boundaries that guard personal relationships and a person's personal and professional reputation.

Ecclesiastes 7:9 — I'll read this in three translations. New King James: "Do not hasten in your spirit to be angry, for anger rests in the bosom of fools." It's stored up there; a foolish person hangs on to it. The Common English Bible: "Don't be too quick to get angry, because anger lives in a fool's heart." Some people are quick to anger, at the drop of a hat — it doesn't take much, just a little trigger, and they explode. The New English Translation: "Do not let yourself be quickly provoked, for anger resides in the lap of fools." In other words, it's very close to us.

So how easily are we provoked? How easily can somebody set us off? We all know somebody where we tread lightly — "Don't mention thus-and-such around so-and-so, because that's a trigger and it'll set them off." Oh boy, watch out for that one. So, as reminded in James 1:19, focus on the word "slow" — slow to speak, slow to anger. "Quickly provoked" is the opposite of what we should do, and that really defines explosive anger. When you're quickly provoked — boom, up goes the nuclear cloud, and the radiation settles everywhere. The trigger might be small, but the response is massive. It doesn't take much to set some people off.

The key here is the gap — the gap between the trigger, or stimulus, and the explosion. In that gap is where self-control has to happen. Ecclesiastes 7:9 really points out the urgency of widening that gap between the trigger and the explosion. Take a breath.

Earlier we mentioned, "Be angry, and do not sin." There's a second part to that verse in Ephesians 4, leading into verse 27: "Be angry, and do not sin: do not let the sun go down on your wrath, nor give place to the devil." Notice how that's all wrapped up together. "Don't let the sun go down on your wrath" means addressing anger promptly, not letting it bubble and fester in the background. Anger or wrath will only get worse if you let it boil inside of you instead of resolving it. And verse 27, right on the heels of that: "nor give place to the devil." The longer we let something bother us and stew, the more we open ourselves up to being exploited by Satan. With unresolved anger, we open ourselves up to sin.

We're given a biblical example of what happens when anger is allowed to fester and bring forth sin — Genesis 4, starting in verse 3: "And in the process of time it came to pass that Cain brought an offering of the fruit of the ground to the Lord. Abel also brought of the firstborn of his flock and of their fat. And the Lord respected Abel and his offering, but He did not respect Cain and his offering. And Cain was very angry, and his countenance fell." Now, it isn't entirely clear, but in retrospect it seems obvious — God was looking for a sacrifice, a live offering, whereas Cain brought fruit of the ground. Abel was a shepherd; Cain was a tiller of the soil.

Verse 6: "So the Lord said to Cain, 'Why are you angry? Why has your countenance fallen? If you do well, will you not be accepted? And if you do not do well, sin lies at the door. And its desire is for you, but you should rule over it.'" In other words, it's emphasizing self-control — even when that happens, you must have self-control.

Verse 8: "Now Cain talked with Abel his brother; and it came to pass, when they were in the field, that Cain rose up against Abel his brother and killed him." Cain's jealousy and uncontrolled anger toward Abel underscore how wrath left unchecked leads to grave sin. God warned Cain — sin is crouching at your door, it desires you, but you must rule over it. In the Complete Jewish Bible: "If you are doing what is good, shouldn't you hold your head high? And if you don't do what is good, sin is crouching at the door — it wants you, but you can rule over it." The Contemporary English Version puts it this way: "If you had done the right thing, you would be smiling. But you did the wrong thing, and now sin is waiting to attack you like a lion. Sin wants to destroy you, but don't let it."

Now, when it says crouching at the door, or waiting like a lion — I'm thinking of our four outdoor cats. We call them porch cats; they live on the porch. We have livestock — chickens and sheep — and there are always residual bits of grain that draw rodents, so we have four cats for outside rodent control. Watch them sometime. We've got one called Muddy — she's black with little brown flecks all over — and she'll crouch in the chicken barn waiting for a mouse, not moving, just waiting. I think of this verse: "Sin is crouching at the door, waiting to attack you like a lion." Those mice don't have a chance when she's there. We have another named Callie — Calico — and she has a different hunting place; I can see her in the pasture behind the house, crouched, waiting for the moment when a stupid bird lands close. It's all over. Every once in a while we see a blue jay's feathers scattered around — should have been more careful. We have another cat that squirrels should be way more careful around; I found just the tail left in the front of the house. The squirrel will run down the tree, the cat will be perfectly still, waiting for the opportune moment. Well, sin is like those cats — waiting to pounce on us if we allow it.

Now we have instructions from Jesus on the importance of not carrying around anger. Matthew 5:22: "But I say to you that whoever is angry with his brother without a cause shall be in danger of the judgment." Jesus warns about anger directed wrongly toward others. This calls for a peacemaking attitude — reconciling quickly with an offended brother or sister. You'll notice it says "brother" here, which by inference means sister as well.

The next two verses, Matthew 5:23–24: "Therefore if you bring your gift to the altar, and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar, and go your way. First be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift." Jesus here is emphasizing the importance of reconciliation, indicating that wrathful outbursts can hinder our relationship with both God and those around us. If we want a positive relationship with God, we must be at peace with our brothers and sisters. In fact, it's listed earlier in that same chapter, Matthew 5:9, in the Beatitudes: "Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God." Notice it doesn't say warmongers — it says peacemakers. So we can do things to improve our situation by being a peacemaker, or we can do the opposite.

Colossians 3:8: "But now you yourselves are to put off all these: anger, wrath, malice, blasphemy, filthy language out of your mouth." That was the New King James. The English Revised Version reads: "Put these things out of your life: anger, losing your temper, doing or saying things to hurt others, and saying shameful things." But how do we do that? It's one thing to say, "Don't do such-and-such" — well, then what should we do?

There's a way to get the air out of a glass, something we may have heard for many years. How do we get the air out of a glass? We put water in it — we replace it with something else. So in order to get rid of impetuous anger, we must put something else in. This biblical need for self-control requires self-awareness. You've got to know what the issue is and want to address it.

So the first point on how to overcome this is: number one, pray for self-control — asking God to help you rule over sin, from what we read about Cain in Genesis 4:7 — and replace bitterness with compassion, having a heart that goes out to someone else, being kind not just to someone else but to yourself as well.

Now, we live close to the displaced Cherokee Nation in Oklahoma, and I know this story about an old Cherokee chief who was teaching his grandson about life. He said to his grandson, "There's a battle going on inside of me, a terrible battle between two wolves. One wolf is bad — it represents fear, anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, and ego. The other wolf is good — it stands for joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith. These two wolves are always battling within me." The grandson thought for a moment, then asked his grandfather, "Which wolf will win?" And the old chief simply replied, "The one you feed."

So you have your choice — you can feed one or the other. It reminds me of a verse we read earlier. The story of the two wolves carries a profound meaning about the choices we make and the impact they have on our lives. It's a reminder that we possess within us both positive and negative qualities, and it's up to us to determine which ones we nourish and allow to guide our actions. At its core, the story teaches us that our thoughts, emotions, and actions shape our reality. It highlights the power of our daily choices and encourages us to be mindful of which wolf we choose to feed. If we consciously feed the good wolf, we foster positive relationships, create a harmonious environment, and experience inner peace and contentment. On the other hand, if we feed the bad wolf, we sow the seeds of discord, unhappiness, and personal turmoil — and that affects a lot of other people as well. Applying this story to our own lives requires a level of self-awareness and a willingness to examine our thoughts and behaviors. It encourages us to choose kindness over anger and foster a positive mindset. We have the power to shape our reality through our choices, and by consistently feeding the good wolf, we can lead a more joyful, meaningful, and purposeful life.

Now, Moses faced those same choices. Moses was considered a very meek man — that's in Numbers 12:3 — a meek leader. But once in a while he allowed anger to override his obedience. In Numbers 20:10–12, in his anger, he struck the rock to produce the water. His example teaches us that even dedicated servants of God have to remain vigilant against outbursts of wrath. We must be careful, because as great a man as Moses was — after all, we all know his name after thousands of years; how many will know our name after thousands of years? — so let's do the best we can.

Every day we have choices. Deuteronomy 30:19: "I call heaven and earth as witnesses today against you, that I have set before you life and death, blessing and cursing; therefore choose life, that both you and your descendants may live." Sounds like a pretty good choice to me. So that's the summary of point one: pray for self-control. That power for self-control is within us.

Point two: pause before reacting. Sometimes we respond too quickly. We should consider pausing to take a breath and consider our words. Proverbs 15:1: "A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger." Ever heard a hot word from somebody and you really had a zinger coming right back? Boy, that'll fix them, right? Did it settle things? Did it solve things? Or did it make things worse? But a soft answer, as Proverbs 15:1 says, turns away wrath.

If we consider the principle of not letting the sun go down on your wrath, from Ephesians 4:26, we should address anger in a timely manner so we're not always ready to be triggered — that way the anger doesn't come to a boil. What happens when you boil something on the stove? You've got the pot on the stove, the lid on the pot, you turn your back for a moment — and the pot boils over, and what have you got? A big mess. So watching what we say, considering it before we say or do it — a pause can be critically important.

We have the example of David — we'll get there — because sometimes after the explosion comes shame. And in shame we want to hide from God. "Oh no, look what we did, look how we did it" — because we didn't bring our failure to be patient before God, didn't pause. So it isn't just that I lost my temper, screamed at somebody, or said something I couldn't take back — we must confess to God what we've done and how we've done it. Many of the Psalms will help us, as will the book of Lamentations. Lamentations 3:22–23: "Through the Lord's mercies we are not consumed, because His compassions fail not. They are new every morning; great is Your faithfulness."

We want to remember to do things decently and in order. Where have we heard that before? First Corinthians 14:40: "Let all things be done decently and in order." So if we don't pause before reacting to something, is that decent? Is it in order? Or is it off the cuff, doing things in our own way, leading to a bad result? So point two is pause before reacting.

Point three: practice forgiveness. Colossians 3:8 calls for putting away bitterness and rage, and that can help break the cycle of explosive anger. Sometimes this means giving space for other people to repent of their own foolishness, rather than complicating both of your lives by your own rash anger. This does not mean we become enablers of other people committing evil. We simply don't get caught up in stumbling over things that aren't worth damaging our relationship with both God and mankind. So point three is practicing forgiveness — wise forgiveness, I might add.

Point four: seek wise counsel. Proverbs 12:15 gives us a very strong statement: "The way of a fool is right in his own eyes, but he who heeds counsel is wise." My uncle — my atheist uncle, and I do quote him from time to time — says, "It's really irritating when you come across people who think they know everything. It's really irritating to those of us who really do." So we read here, "The way of a fool is right in his own eyes, but he who heeds counsel is wise." Well, in order to heed counsel, you have to actually listen to counsel — you have to first seek it out and then listen.

Proverbs 19:20: "Listen to counsel and receive instruction, that you may be wise in your latter days." And I thought, wait a minute — he didn't quit right after "listen to counsel and receive instruction." He says "wise in your latter days," because what do people tend to do? They're going to do what they're going to do anyway, and then in their latter days they go, "That's why I should have done what the wise counsel said." Uh-huh, now I get it — now I'm suffering the bruises and the damage.

Proverbs 1:5: "A wise man will hear and increase learning, and a man of understanding will attain wise counsel." So go get it. Go attain wise counsel. If you're going to be wise, you want to hear it and then increase your learning. One more in Proverbs on this point — Proverbs 11:14: "Where there is no counsel, the people fall; but in the multitude of counselors there is safety." So on one hand you can have no counsel — and then what? You're at risk of being your own counselor in foolishness. But what if you only ask one other person, one other reference, one other source? Does that follow this instruction? It says, "in the multitude of counselors there is safety." "Well, I talked to so-and-so, and he said do thus-and-such." You might want to get a second, third, and fourth opinion on that, because in a multitude of counselors there is safety — you don't want to repeat somebody else's mistake. So point four is seek wise counsel.

Well, today we've examined how the Bible views explosive anger. We can see how the lack of patience and self-control is contrary to God's law of living an orderly life, and the consequences are critical if we want to inherit a place in the kingdom of God. We read that we must avoid outbursts of wrath if we want to enter the kingdom of God — which means we have to increase our patience and self-control. We all want to enjoy the spiritual fruit of the Holy Spirit by practicing the way of God rather than the practices of man absent the knowledge of God.

So to summarize: let's pray for self-control. Let's pause before reacting. Let's practice forgiveness. Let's seek wise counsel. And if we do these things, we can put explosive anger in the past.