Love Them Where They Are

So, I began after we got back from the feast. You remember I gave this message uh that I titled what comes after the feast? Well, you know, I'm going to remind you why. It was because I wanted us to shift our paradigm from kind of don't let ourselves get into the woe is me.

Let's let's get into the attitude of it's time to go to work. We were learning about our responsibilities as first fruits that are coming. We're going to be serving Jesus Christ. We got to get ready for that. Like now's the time to focus on getting ready for that. Let's make that the work we get to right away after the feast.

And then we can be energized about doing something positive and proactive. And as opposed to looking backward, we're looking forward. And then I started getting nitpicky because I I gave you an assignment, right? It was to go through Galatians 5, look at the fruit of the spirit, maybe do a selfanalysis. And as I began to kind of work my my way through that myself, I realized maybe that's a heavier assignment than I realized.

There's a lot there's a lot to go through if you're going to go through those things carefully. And and I thought, okay, well, let's let's let's take a step back and and maybe let's go through these really carefully, one at a time. So, I gave you the introductory message to that, which I called the decisions that reveal our character.

And in and in that one, what I wanted you to see was there isn't waiting for us one big event in which God is going to measure our character. That our character is being measured every single day in all the decisions that we're making. All the little tiny decisions and choices that we make every day.

That's what we're being evaluated based off of. Rarely do we find ourselves faced with the big trial that totally defines who we are. Most of us, we live our life making small choices. And you make enough small choices and that tells God a lot about who you really are. Okay, with that idea in mind, I wanted to tackle each of the fruit of the spirit one at a time.

I want us to do a bit of a deep dive and I want us to think about each of the fruit that are presented in Galatians chapter 5. I'm going to turn over there to begin Galatians chapter 5, beginning in verse 22. Let's just note again this is this was the homework assignment that I gave us all after the feast.

Now we're going to get in earnest. We're going to start working on the homework together. It says, ' But the fruit of the spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. Nine fruit listed. Now, I've heard, you've probably heard, too. I've heard a single message to try to cover all nine of those.

And I've smiled when I when I I see somebody tackling something like this in a single message because you know that's swimming the Atlantic Ocean in one day. It's that's a big that's a big ask. So I like to slow down and can we take this in bites in increments if you will and let's tackle them one at a time with this view of what am I doing every day that I can evaluate myself on this fruit? How am I doing on this one? What does it look like? What should it look like? What does it look like in me? And am I measuring up to it? Or maybe do I need

to do some work here? And I think in the little decisions is the best way we can do this evaluation. So obviously then we begin with the first one today. I've already introduced it now and I've given you all the backstory. So we're going to start today with love. It is the first of the fruit that are listed.

Now, when we use the word love, look, you know, I was thinking about this and I'll just comment as a bit of a sidebar. You know as well as I do that we cover love a lot. It is a staple food of the church. And it's challenging to to approach a subject in a way that connects when it can be a subject that can sometimes feel even numb because don't we hear about this all the time? I just did a a Bible study on the questions that we've been following.

And I think it was either 37 38 or 39 someplace in there. 1 Corinthians 13, the love chapter. I understand that it I looked at this message specifically with with that in the back of my mind that let's try to not just rinse and repeat the same messages we've heard for decades on what love is.

Let's let's see if we can't get into its practical application and look carefully at that from that view. That's why I mentioned let's look at those everyday choices, everyday decisions and let's use that as the backdrop for how we do this. Now, we have to begin if we're going to look at love, we have to begin with who is the source of this love that's being talked about.

It it it can't be from what comes within us because we all know what our attitude and minds and spirit are. We have human nature that drives our bus. So, the love that we have to have, the love that's described here is agape love. That's Ken's pronunciation of the Greek word. Let's just agree that it will work for our purposes. You may say it slightly different.

I'm going to be saying agape. All right? Some people say it different. I don't even want to try how other people will say it. If I'm wrong, please accept my apology. It's how I'm going to say it. All right. So, we're going to start that God identifies himself as this fruit. 1 John chapter 4. If we want a definition of agape love, we go to First John and we're going to turn over to 1 John chapter 4 and we'll read verses 7-1.

Okay? 1 John 4 7-1. John writes, "Beloved, let us love one another for God is of or for love is of God." Let me adjust my glasses here. For love is of God. And everyone who loves is born of God and knows God. He who does not love does not know God. For God is love. This is agape. The source.

The very existence of our heavenly father gives us the definition of love. Okay? That he is love. And that through him, through his spirit, we have that same love available to us. Now, is love a feeling? The world gets confused by this, don't they? They confuse, for example, romantic love with the emotions that are behind it as opposed to what is love.

The world often mistakes a feeling for what love really is, which is action. It is action. Now you'll see that very clearly here that God is when it says that God is love then we look to what he has done. You could look of course you could you could step all the way back and say well I exist because God has a plan to make future sons and daughters in his spiritual family.

I wouldn't exist unless he loved that idea. He wants children in his spiritual family. That's an amazing idea if you think about that in the context of love. What did he do in order to bring that about? He made the universe. He created the perfect planet called Earth and he populated it with his future children.

He gave us a spirit, a mind to be able to think and to reason and to compl and to contemplate and to choose for ourselves to follow him or not. That's love in action. The epitome, the pinnacle of that love was his sacrifice of his son for us. Action followed by action. This is love. This is what I want us to think about in terms of the practical application of the love defined as the fruit of the spirit. It is action.

What action? Let's continue reading verse 9. It says in this the love of God was manifested which means made obvious displayed for us given to us as evidence manifested. It's real. Okay. In this the love of God was manifested towards us that God has sent his only begotten son into this world that we might live through him.

action for our good. That's what I want you to see that God's the definition of love viewed from God and who he is is action for our good in this is love. Verse 10, not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his son to be the propitiation for our sins. That just means the payment of the penalty, the price that's owed.

He sent Christ to pay that price for our sins. Verse 11, beloved, if God so loved us to do those things, showing us his love, we also ought to do those things for one another. We also ought to love one another. Love is action for the good of another. actions for the good of another. So John says love is of God and God is love.

And then John goes on to explain what that means by pointing to what God did. See he didn't say see God said this and God thought that. His argument was no look at what he did. That's the evidence of the love. what he did. So the measure of God's love is visible in his action toward people. Now Paul makes the circumstances of that love even clear.

Let's go over to Romans chapter 5 to see what Paul said about this. Romans chapter 5 verse 6. I'm going to read uh 6 through8. Romans 56-8. In verse 6 it says, "For when we were still without strength, in due time, Christ died for the ungodly." That describes us when we were before we were converted. When we still lived in our own sins, whatever stage or place of life that was, it was before conversion and baptism and the receiving of the Holy Spirit.

When we had no strength, Christ died for the ungodly. For scarcely for a righteous man will one die. Yet perhaps for a good man, someone would even dare to die. But God demonstrates his own love toward us. And that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us. God demonstrates his love. God isn't a big fan of I will tell you all all about how much I love you.

God is a big fan of showing you his love, manifesting, demonstrating, proving through his actions that he loves. And notice that he didn't wait until we had corrected all of the deficiencies in our character, in who we are, and perfected ourselves before he said, "Okay, now I love you, and will apply the death of my son to those former sins of yours.

" He didn't wait for any of that. It began by him seeing what the need would be, making the decision to provide for that, and then doing it. This is love. This is God's display of agape love. So godly love is acting for the good of others without conditions. I don't know about you. I suspect you're a little like me in this way. Pretty easy to put conditions on how we treat other people.

You notice how it's easy to show appreciation to someone who shows appreciation to you. how easy it is when somebody's kind to you to be kind to them. When they say nice things and do nice things, how easy it is to say nice things and to do nice things for them. How much harder is it when somebody doesn't say nice things or do nice things to go ahead and say nice things and do nice things for them? This is the example we're given.

Were we terrific people before conversion? Could God honestly look upon us and say, "Well, where you are is exactly the way I like you?" I kind of doubt that. At least for me. I can say that confidently. There's some changing that's going to have to happen here. He still sent his son to die for me. He didn't wait for me to be Mr.

nice guy to turn my attitude around to completely worship in him in every way and demonstrate perfection first. This is a real clue about what he expects when he demonstrates his own love towards other and what we need to be thinking about when I'm doing the measurement when I'm doing the evaluation of how am I doing on this particular fruit when I look back over the past week.

Can I honestly say I nailed it every single day. I showed godly love to everyone that I came in contact with. I genuinely put every single person first. When you start thinking about how we are as human beings, you start to think, well, hang on a second. I'm not perfect yet.

There may have been an interaction or two in there where I might not have measured up to that. That's the honest reflection that we need to do. Okay. Well, why didn't I measure up to that in every single case? It's a great test. It's a great bar. It's a great great way for us to look at this. Not on this sort of ethereal concept of well, we are all supposed to be coming like Jesus Christ and just love love.

How about those individual choices and decisions? Can we look at those and see where we've won and where we've lost? where we've succeeded and where we've failed. Jesus gave his disciples a standard, kind of a tough one. John chapter 13. You probably know what this is. John 13 verse 34 and 35. John 13:34 and 35.

And it says here, "A new commandment I give to you, the God of the Old Testament, the the being who stood as the God of the Old Testament as the word was Jesus Christ." The same being talking right now, the God who gave the ten commandments stands before these disciples and he says, "I have a new commandment for you that carries some weight.

" It should carry some weight. Here's the commandment that you love one another as I have loved you. Well, we we've been looking at what does that mean? It means actions for the benefit of other people without conditions where they don't have to please us in order for us to act in in their best interest.

They don't have to have satisfied all of our desires, all of our wants in order for us to act on their behalf, for what's good for them. Look, this is this is one of those ones that gets really tough when you start looking at, okay, who's the person I'm not willing to do that for? Is it the person that said the mean thing to me last week? Who offered criticisms about something that I just didn't appreciate? Who was critical of me in some particular way that hurt? God did not place conditions upon his love and his expressions of love.

He tells us through Christ right here, I give you this commandment that you are to treat people the way I treat people. If you're like me, that makes me want to sit down and close my eyes, curl up into a tiny ball, and try to forget that I'm a human being that is not measured up in this way all the time.

Like, it's hard. This is really hard when you think about every day my choices and my decisions. It's not just about people in the world. He says right here, who's he says he wants to see this happen to? He says that you love one another as I have loved you. That you also love one another.

And by the way, by this all will know that you are my disciples if you have agape for one another. Wow. You know the good news about this is if you think about it here we are trying to become like Jesus Christ and he says all right but in the laboratory where I want you to do your work I give you other people who are also doing that work.

You're going to do this together. You know, the beautiful thing about that is while I'm working on trying to show you godly love where I do what's best in your interest, no matter how I feel without conditions, that you're doing the same thing. And maybe that we're both trying to do this, there's some mercy for when we fail to do it perfectly.

I'm kind of glad that God doesn't say the measurement for how you're doing is how you are in this world on this subject. Is the world going to be kind when you are sacrificing selflessly for individuals in the world? Are you going to be reciprocated with kindness and mercy? Maybe sometimes, maybe not. How does it help us to practice when all of the efforts we put forward are rejected? Christ didn't give us that as the measurement.

The measurement was how you treat each other. That's how I'm going to evaluate you on this. How are you treating each other? Now, as we learn together to practice this agape in our everyday decisions, our every week interactions with one another, we are building the character God is looking for that says, "I am becoming like his son." That person is who will be a first fruit.

Those people are responsible for teaching the rest of the world. all of the human beings who live through the millennium, who live through the tribulation, who live through the the day of the Lord and all of the terrible things that are going to happen, who are alive when Jesus Christ returns, and who are not turned into spirit beings, but who live through the millennium as human beings.

We come out of this life having supposed to have prepared to help them selflessly help them become like Jesus Christ too without conditions to do what's best for them. Where this one poked me particularly tenderly was when I was thinking about how I've been hurt before and how it's so difficult when you get wounded by somebody to still act on their best behalf no matter what they did to you to still act on their best behalf.

That's the every single day choices I get to make that define the character I am building. So that hopefully at the end of my life if I have sacrificed enough, loved people enough that I look just enough like Christ that God says yes, you are a first fruit. Take your place when Jesus Christ returns. Have you noticed how readily we recognize things that other people need to change? Let's go to Matthew chapter 7.

We're talking about we're going to keep this in the framework of what does agape love, the fruit of the spirit identified in Galatians 5:22. What does it look like? Matthew 7, we'll begin with the first five verses. Matthew chapter 7, he says, "Judge not that you be not judged." There's a very clear context for when he uses the word judge here.

The better the better term for us to to understand what's being said is if we use the word condemn. Condemnation in this sense is to decide for God the future outcome of somebody else. They're not worthy to be a first fruit. They're not worthy to be in the kingdom, whatever our condemnation might be. Christ says, "Condemn not that you be not condemned.

For with what condemnation you condemn, you will be condemned. And with the measure or the criteria that you choose to use, that same criteria will be measured back to you. That should be a very sobering idea to us. This isn't talking about our ability to evaluate what we see happen, somebody's conduct, somebody's choice, somebody's decision, and we say to ourselves, I wouldn't do it that way.

I see the consequences. I see the direction. I I don't think that was beneficial for them. I wouldn't choose to do that. That's not condemnation. That's learning. I hope we're all capable of doing that kind of evaluation. This isn't what he's talking about. This is where we get up here and we're looking down and we're making decisions about what we think their future should look like.

And here's how some ways in which he says that you can be guilty of this. He says, "Why do you look at the speck in your brother's eye, but do not consider the plank in your own eye?" Does this the fact that there is a speck in the brother's eye is simply an indication that they're a human being. They are flawed like we are.

But we are human beings and therefore the ability for us to compare and contrast is very easy. And it's also very hard for us to see our own flaws. And so it's easy for us to look at somebody else and what what they might think is a tiny thing and here we are saying look at this big thing. You need to work on this.

To them it might be just a speck. But God says yes but reverse those because that's a plank in your eye if you can't see it. It's blinding you. But this is human nature isn't it? I'm easily able to identify the flaws in another human being. It's just so much harder to find them in myself. We're all to some degree like that. And he says here in verse four, so how can you say to your brother, "Let me remove the speck from your eye.

Let me help you. I I I've seen this flaw that you have. Let me help you with this." And you might be looking directly back at them and say, "You need to clean up your own act, partner, before you start giving me advice on how I should live my life." Like that seems like a very common uh potential interaction.

But let me remove the speck from your eye. And look, a plank is in your own eye. He says, hypocrite. First remove the plank from your own eye and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye. In other words, you stop focusing on the tiny imperfections of others and really start looking in the mirror about ourselves.

That's why I started with the idea, let's take a strong look at these individual fruit, and really look at our day-to-day choices, our day-to-day decisions, and see what does this look like in my life, not what does it look like in someone else's life. What's it look like in my life? How am I doing? I I'm not responsible for somebody else's choices.

I need to really focus on what I'm doing, my choices, and be very slow to see the shortcomings in other people. And it doesn't matter that the other people can be they don't have to be our spouse or our children. They can be our co-workers and our colleagues. They can be anybody that we interact with in the world. God is love, outgoing concern, acting on the benefit of other people regardless of their status, relationship, no conditions.

It doesn't mean that he delivers ultimate promises to people who reject him. That's not what we're talking about. We're talking about how he acts for the benefit of others. I'd like us to think about this. There's a difference between seeing a deficiency in someone and seeing someone as deficient. Making decisions about them and their character simply because they're flawed.

We are all flawed. And if we're going to love someone where they are, we have to recognize that we're all flawed to one degree or another. That hopefully helps us to see this whole judgment idea a little bit more carefully. I want to be careful with what judgment that I use with another human being. That condemnation that's described here in Matthew chapter 7.

We can recognize weakness but fail to recognize progress. If we get focused in the wrong direction, that's human nature to see the weakness. But what about the progress? You know, the problem with that is we don't know where they started. I have no idea when I meet somebody and I learn that they may have been struggling with something, I don't know how long they've been struggling with it and how far they've already come.

This is why mercy, our mercy, the way God is merciful towards us, is so important in how we interact with other people, how we treat other people. Notice we're staying so focused on love itself. We're not talking about kindness or joy or any of the other fruit. We're talking specifically about what do I do for another person because of love.

Doing for them what's good for them without condition. This is the practical application of love. It's we we it's the place we need to go in our homes, in our work, in our congregations, everywhere. We need to be leading with this love of God. You've often heard me use the expression, love them where they are. I use that as a mantra for myself because you meet people in all different places in whatever journey that they're on in life.

As I said, in the church or out of the church, everyone's on some kind of a journey. You oft heard the saying, you know, walk a mile in their shoes. It's a similar concept. I try to think about loving people where they are, not where I want them to be. as if I can't show them love until they get there. I can't sacrifice for them until they've arrived.

I have to sacrifice for them all throughout the process. I need to make decisions on a daily basis that show that that's where my mind is. Not putting me first, genuinely putting what's good for them first. Let's look at the example in this regard to how Christ viewed other people. He Let's start with Peter over in chapter over in Luke chapter 22 beginning in 30 verse 31.

I'll read through verse 34. Luke 22 verse 31 of Luke 22 says, "And the Lord said,"Simon, Simon, indeed Satan has asked for you that he may sift you as wheat." I may have commented on this before, but if you want to know what he's talking about, you have to go to the book of Job. If you want to know what sifting when Satan says, "I want to sift someone," you read what happens at the beginning of the book of Job, and you see what sifting looks like.

Satan says, Christ's own words. Satan has asked to sift you, Simon Peter, to find out what you're made of. He thinks Simon Peter will run away, turn his back on Christ the moment there's real adversity. That's why Satan wants to do it. Reread the book of Job and you'll see what he thought Job would do if he just had a little sifting.

Verse 32 says, "But I have prayed for you that your faith should not fail." This is an interesting comment, "And when you have returned to me, strengthen your brethren." In the terms of what he's just said, that's an odd statement. when you have returned to me, I'm right here. I haven't left. What is this statement you're saying, Christ? Peter says, uh, but he said to him, this is Peter saying, Lord, I'm ready to go with you both to prison and to death.

So, Peter, I'm sure genuinely in his preconversion state, thought this was true. He's a very confident man. But Christ knew his strengths and he knew his weaknesses. Verse 34, Christ says to him, "I tell you, Peter, the rooster shall not crow this day before you will deny me three times that you will deny three times that you know me.

" Well, as we know as the story goes on that he absolutely does exactly that. when it looks when it starts to happen in real time. Christ is being taken away. He's going to be tried. He's he's going to be crucified and it dawns on Peter. What does he do except what Christ said he would do? He denies him three times and then the rooster crows and Peter comes to himself.

Did Christ leave him there? Let's think about this in the terms of somebody who makes a mistake and wounds us. Christ did not leave him there. He gave him a hint about where he was in his attitude and what his thoughts were towards Peter when he said, "When you have returned to me, strengthen your brethren. You'll you'll come back.

You're going to you're going to go through something and it's not going to be pleasant. How do you think Peter felt after denying Christ? Wasn't it Peter when Christ said, "Who do you say that I am?" Wasn't it Peter who said, "You are the son of God." Where else would we go? There is no other place. He knew who Christ was. He turned his back on Christ.

How do you live with yourself when you've done that? He's not different, I don't think, than you and I would be. Even Judas hung himself for his betrayal when he came to himself. It It's a thing. I think shame, guilt, embarrassment. It's quite remarkable that Peter comes back. But he does. He returns. But Christ never gave up on him.

John chapter 21, even at the very end, Christ is asking Peter something very important. And it's pretty much this questions that we've been asking ourselves today. How am I doing on agape? Christ asks Peter the same question. But note that Peter's being asked this question before conversion. It is impossible for us to have agape love, God's love in us without the Holy Spirit.

which is the means of having God's love in us. Over in John chapter 21 beginning in verse 15. So when they had eaten breakfast, Jesus says to Simon Peter, Simon son of Jonah, do you agape me more than these? This is the question on our plate right now. How am I doing on agapeing my brethren? Here he says, "Do you agape me more than these?" Peter says to him, "Yes, Lord.

You know that I file you. I I absolutely love you as a brother, man. No question about it." He says to him, "Feed my lambs." Who are his lambs? The church hasn't started yet. The church is going to start soon. and it's going to be filled with the lambs of God. Those he calls out of this world, young innocent spiritual beings.

And he tells Peter, I want you to feed them. So he says to Peter a second time, "Simon, son of Jonah, do you agape me?" And he says, "Yes, Lord, you know that I fa you." Part of me thinks Peter must at least recognize that he's not capable of agape. Not yet. He doesn't have God's spirit in him.

And so he doesn't lie to Christ and say, "Yep, I agape you." When he has not the Holy Spirit, it's impossible. So he says to him, "Tend my sheep." He says to him a third time, "Simon, son of Jonah, do you phia me? I'll meet you where you are. Do you really even Phileia me? Now it says Peter was grieved because he said to him the third time, "Do you file me?" And he said to him, "Lord, you know all things.

You know that I file you." And Jesus said to him, "Feed my sheep." It's pretty remarkable conversation to me when we think about what Peter had done. But here, Christ has moved past Peter's betrayal and accepted him and given him a responsibility when the church starts to feed the lambs that God would call through Christ.

So Christ was focused on what's best for Peter. It wasn't leaving him at his mistake. This is a great clue about how God wants us to treat each other and how he wants us to learn to help other people move past where they were to where he wants them to go. Not demanding that they arrive before we give them that love and that compassion and the mercy that they need, but to lead with what's best for them without condition.

First, looking at the clock here, I want to stay on time. Let's move on to my next point here. In the previous message, we looked at everyday decisions as evidence of character. And of course, that's why we've been looking at this subject through the same lens. How am I doing every day with my choices, with my decisions? because those are the ordinary opportunities for us to act.

We read earlier in 1 John 3 about someone who sees a brother in need and has the means to help. Did we read that? I think I skipped that. Read first John 3 that talks about a brother in need. If you want to know what practical application of love is, we probably should just turn over there. 1 John chapter 3.

We might as well. Your notetakers are going to ring your hands at me later. I know. Let's do it. Let's do it. 1 John 3:16. Let's read this real quick. It says, "By this we know love. because he laid down his life for us, we also ought to lay down our lives for the brethren. But whoever has this world's goods and sees his brother in need and shuts up his heart from him, how does the love of God abide in him? My little children, let us not love in word or in tongue, but in deed and in truth.

very clearly showing us what the practical application of love is. Our direct action on the benefit of others and that withholding what we could do is what's being judged here. And this is why love shows up in the little things that we do. You remember the story of the Samaritan and the man from Jerusalem who went down to Judea and who fell amongst the thieves. That's over in Luke chapter 10.

You can pick that up. Verse 30 through37. Let me just give you the high points of it. Jerusalem is of course where the temple is and of course we have temple service and we have priests and Levites who serve at the temple. Christ is describing for these guys a scenario. Now you understand when Christ gives a parable that he's inventing a story to make a point to teach a lesson.

He invents a story about a man. He doesn't describe who the man is but he says the man is going from Jerusalem to Jericho. Jericho had a very large population of residences of priests and Levites who served at the temple about a 21 mile walk. When you served your time, you went home.

He's using this as a as his basis for his story. And he says that a man going from Jerusalem to Jericho, presumably a Jew, gets fallen upon by thieves, gets robbed and half dead. A priest presumably coming home from duty on his way to Jericho sees him, crosses to the other side, leaves him there. A Levite presumably coming off of duty going home, sees the same man, turns to the other side of the street and lets him go.

Christ uses a Samaritan. Why? Of all the people on planet Earth, the Jews hated the Samaritans the most. If you want to know who my neighbor is is the question, who is my neighbor? He says, "The Samaritan helps the man presumably a Jew." The priest and Levite didn't help their countrymen. The Samaritan did. Who's the one applauded? Who's the one lauded in the story? the Samaritan.

There's a real lesson if we meditate throughout that story that we can look at our own lives and say, "hm, where are the ways in which I'm doing something that might be something like that? Am I withholding kindness? Am I withholding mercy? Am I withholding actions for the benefit of somebody else because of their station, what they look like, their political views? their social views.

Would I not extend kindness, mercy, and love to that person because I disagreed with them? This is where the rubber meets the road for us without condition. That's what God does. This is what he's asking us to do without condition. Do what's best for the other person. Let's bring this to our normal week. Somebody wants to talk with us after services.

Not saying this ever happens because it probably doesn't, but it's an idea and I really need to go. And so I just won't take the time to sit down and talk with him. Now, as pastor, I've been learning this lesson like take the time, man. You don't have that much. So, we try to take the time. If you need us, we're going to stay as late as you want.

But early on, I was trying to learn the lesson. And I didn't realize that people, they want to talk to their pastor. Like, but I'm not the only one. Many of you serve as counselors, as confidants, somebody to just sit and listen and encourage. We can oftenimes get wrapped up in our own needs and wants and think can this wait when maybe our reaction should be you bet let's sit down I'm giving an extreme because it's personal to me and the role that I fulfill and it absolves you of any guilt because you don't have the same responsibility but you can picture your

own end of that how would you respond maybe you're at home and the kids need something isn't it isn't it Funny that when you're in the middle of something that you think is important, it's the one time when the kids or the wife or the neighbor, whatever, that's when they need something from you.

And what do you find yourself do? I don't know if you do this, but I do this. I'm looking at what I'm already doing. I want to know in some pretty good detail what it is you want me to do so that I can evaluate whether that's more important to me than what I'm already doing. And yet it might be really important to them.

And I'm like, have I have I won on that all week long? No. I have to be honest. Couple of different times I didn't quite nail that one where I I looked at what I was doing and I just thought, you know what, this is just more important to me right now than your needs. And I think probably all of us can reflect on, hey, wait a minute, that is a how can I express love to someone else issue.

in the moment during the week where I'm making these everyday decisions and choices. What does it look like? Well, what did I do? I can evaluate that. Would you give yourself an A? Well, let's look at them one by one. That's what I'd want to do. Cuz maybe on the whole, maybe if if I got a batting average of an A, would I be okay with that? I think God's saying, "Okay, I can give you the on the averages, but you better have a pretty high average.

Let's be working on the average here and let's raise that up." But if you've got a D going blouse, let's work on that real hard. So that's my that's my thinking on that. But here here's what's behind that thought. Philippians 2, just because we're human. Philippians 2. I'm not saying any of you are guilty of this cuz I I'm not throwing rocks from my house.

All right. Philippians 2 verse three, let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit. What is selfish ambition? The things that I want to do, my ambitions, not yours. Mine come first. He says, don't. No, that's not the No, that's not right. Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in loneliness of mind, let each esteem others better than himself.

Kind of I'm I'm thinking to myself, if let's just take an extreme weird example. The president of the United States knocks on my door. No matter what I'm in the middle of doing, he gets my time. Just that's going to h you. Same with you. I guarantee you you're going to give him the time. Why? You all of a sudden you see yourself in the lower position.

And that's the way God says we're supposed to view not just him. Doesn't matter who it is. Just kind of have that general sense that what I'm doing isn't automatically more important. Now, there are times when you might be doing is very important. If you're giving CPR to somebody, that's probably the most important thing you can do.

So, if somebody comes up and says, "Hey, can you help me find this app on my phone?" Clearly, a difference between those two things. So, you there is a reasonable thing where you can say, "No, this really is the most important thing I can be doing right now." Okay. But you know, if you're playing Candy Crush, is that thing a thing still? Somebody still playing that after all these years, you better not be doing Candy Crush when somebody needs CPR.

That's all I'm saying. Anyway, but let's keep reading here. So, verse, we're going to read through verse 5. It says, "Leach of you, each of you look out not only for his own interest, but also for the interests of others. Let this mind be in you which was also in Christ Jesus. So we're supposed to take on the mind of Christ.

Okay? And Christ did not have our mind. So we're supposed to take on his mind which is way up here and ours is way down here by comparison. All right. Now let's look over here one other place. It isn't just about those people that we love. It's about everyone. Luke chapter 6. Okay. Luke chapter 6 verse 32. Christ speaking here about loving your enemies.

Verse 32 he says but if you love those who love you what credit is that to you I only re I only give agape love to those who agape love me and if you don't sacrifice for me and I don't have any desire to sacrifice for you he says what no it's not the right attitude obviously what credit is to you if you just love those who love you for even sinners love those who love them well that's pretty plain world is filled with sinners who have loved ones and they all love them.

We all experience that. He's saying, "Okay, so if you only show this kind of love we've been describing to those closest to you, that's not a credit to you. It has to be to everyone." That's our attitude. We've got to get from outside of oursel, outside of even our closest family, and start treating everybody this way.

That's where it starts to get real tough because we live in a world in which that kind of love is not reciprocated. But we do it anyway because it's really easil easy for us to respond favorably to people who already treat us well. Much harder for people who mistreat us to treat them well because it's for their good.

no matter how they treated us. Very, very high bar. How do we grow in God's love? Well, recognizing that we have a weakness in an area isn't the end of the assignment. The assignment is to evaluate and then do something, right? So, that's what we got to do. We got to say, okay, how am I doing on this? And then when I realize I need to grow, we've got to get to work.

Romans 5. Let's read this real quickly here as we begin to kind of wrap up. Romans 5, just one verse here. Verse 5, it says, "Now hope does not disappoint because the love of God has been poured out in our hearts by the Holy Spirit which was given to us." This is our hope of overcoming, of changing, of growing in love in our everyday decisions that God has given us his spirit.

So we know as we began that it begins by looking at what is love, who defines love? This kind of love described in Galatians 5:22, that love, agape love, is God. And he defines what that love is. And it is selflessly giving to others what they need for their benefit without condition. It's only possible for us to do that by God's Holy Spirit.

But God says it's been poured out through Paul. It's been poured out into us through his spirit. It's in there. If we let it come out of us, it's in there. Okay. Galatians 5. Let's look at these two real quick. Galatians 5. Verse 16. There's two verses, 16 and 25. Verse 16 says, "I say then, walk in the spirit and you shall not fulfill the lust of the flesh. Walk in the spirit.

" So, we've been given the spirit. The spirit wants us to do what God wants. That's why he gave us the spirit and it is the means by which we can do it. So he says walk. What is walking about? Deliberate action. Step after step. Daily choices. Step after step. Choice by choice. Decision by decision. That's how we do it.

We may not overcome all at once. We might make several steps in a row that are perfectly great and then we might stumble a few and we get back up and we deliberately again choose another step, another choice, another decision that is correct, that is right. Verse 25 says essentially the same thing. If we live in the spirit, let us also walk in the spirit.

If you have God's Holy Spirit, get up every day, start taking those steps, start making those right decisions. That means applying God's instructions in every choice that we make every single day. There's not one big giant event waiting for us to show God our character. It's every incremental choice and decision that we make that defines our character.

If I want to be like God and have that love manifested in my life, the answer is very simple. Am I putting the best needs of someone else for them first? Am I choosing to do what's best for them without condition? No matter what they've done, no matter how they've hurt, wounded, bruised, can I still put them first? Can I still do what's good for them? This is the practical application of love as the fruit of God's spirit.