Principles of Marriage

Welcome back to Cincinnati on Monday and Thursday. This week we're going to stay in the area. We're going to hunker down in hibernate a little bit and see if we can get around, do some visiting, and take care of things locally. The main thing I've got to do tomorrow is clean my yard. It looks like somebody got up in the top of the trees and knocked all the leaves and branches out.

It looks like somebody threw a landmine out there and blew everything up. All of that can be cleaned up.

When you look at the book of Genesis, you find a lot of firsts.

The first humans are recorded in the book of Genesis, and God, you find, is the one who made them.

In spite of what evolution will tell you, we did not come from scum or climb from slime. We are here because God created us and God made us. Let's go over here to Genesis 1. I want you to notice what God did when He made the first humans.

Genesis 1, beginning in verse 26.

God had already made the animals, and you find that God said, Let us make man in our image.

God was not somebody who was absent-minded. He's not saying us when He means me.

There's more than one being here. He says, Let us make man in our image according to our likeness. So we, as human beings, are made in the image of God. God has an image. We are made like Him. Let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, over the birds of the air, over the cattle, over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth. So God gave man authority over all of this. So God created man in His own image. In the image of God, He created Him.

Male and female, He created them.

Now, I want you to notice, right off the bat, God is the one who created the sexes.

He created men, and He created women. Men are different from women, and women are different from men. God created the gender. He created male and female. Why did God do this? Well, you'll notice, in verse 28, God blessed them. God said to them, Be fruitful and multiply, fill the earth, subdue it, have dominion over the fish of the sea, over the birds of the air, over every living thing that moves on the earth.

And so God wanted this man, this woman, to be fruitful. He wanted them to multiply. And you cannot do this if He had created male-male, or if He had created female-female. You would not be fruitful. You would not be multiplying. You would be two. You would live for a certain period of time. You'd die, and that's the end of the human race. The only way you're going to multiply and replenish the earth is if you are able to produce offspring. And so God's very purpose from the very beginning was to have male-female. The first saying that God did when He established society, He established the very basics of society.

When I say basics of society, you find here in Genesis 2 that God establishes a principle here on which all society, for the last six thousand years, has function. Let's notice beginning in verse 21, the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall on Adam, and He slept, and He took one of His ribs, and He closed up the flesh in its place. Then the rib, which the Lord God had taken from the man, He made into a woman, and He brought her to the man. And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, flesh of my flesh, she shall be called woman, because she was taken out of man.

So we find that God creates the woman. He created the man first. The woman was the last of the creation that God created. And notice in verse 24, Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother, be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. What is the basis of society that God established from the very beginning? He established the marriage unit, the family unit, that a man grows up in his father's house.

We've all had children. But when our children get married, God says, You leave your father and your mother, you cleave to your mate, and you become one flesh. You establish a totally separate marriage unit. And so God intended that there be family units. And as the human population began to grow before the flood, you find there were hundreds and hundreds of family units started.

The marriage ceremony that we use whenever we marry someone states that marriage is a divine institution ordained by God. Now, since most of you were not married by using the church's wedding ceremony, I thought I might read from it. At least read from the introduction of the wedding ceremony to show you that when we marry someone, they're married. As far as the Bible is concerned, what scriptures say. But I want you to notice, as I read through this, that the principles articulated here are principles that are founded upon the scriptures.

To begin with, it says, Surely there could be no greater human joy than to have a happy marriage filled with giving and sharing. There is no deeper relationship among human beings than that achieved by a husband and wife in marriage. When you have a couple who are married, who deeply love one another, who have a relationship on all levels, mentally, emotionally, physically, and spiritually, there can be no deeper relationship than what an individual enters into. Marriage is a natural union. You've got two physical human beings doing physical things together.

But it is a divine institution ordained of God. It was established by the Creator God at creation. It derives its authority from the divine laws of God, immutable and unchangeable. The spiritual laws of God governing marriage never alter, never change. It doesn't matter what age, what society, what decade, what millennium we live in, but the principles governing marriage are the same as they were 6,000 years ago. They're the same today.

Now, if we live by those principles, we will have a happy marriage. If we disregard those principles, if we say they're not valid today, then to the degree that we disregard them, we're going to have problems. When God created life upon the earth, He made human beings. The physical creation, fashioning them in His own image, He gave men and women creative minds with the ability to make choices, to develop plans to build their lives upon those plans.

Men and women were created with the marvelous potential of eternal life in the family of God. And as a loving Father, God gave us the institution of marriage and the blessing of the family that we might learn to love one another as He loves us. I think, to me, this is one of the key note sentences in the whole wedding ceremony, that God has given us families. Why? That we might learn to love one another as He loves us.

How much did God love us? Well, it says God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son. God was willing to give His Son. He was willing to put all on the line to bring us into a family relationship. So, in marriage, you can be as totally selfish and self-absorbed as a person can be. When you get married, you can't continue to be that way. You've got to be willing to give.

You are in a relationship, and you're there to serve one another. You're there to help one another. You're there to give to each other. It teaches us not to be selfish. It teaches us to be able to give. We read going on in the ceremony after He created the first man from the dust of the ground, the Lord God said, It's not good the man should be alone.

I will make him a helper comparable to him. So, the woman was made equal to the man in spiritual potential, the perfect complement to her husband. To emphasize His purpose for Adam and Eve, the Creator did not make the woman directly from the ground, but from the very flesh and bone of the man. When the woman was presented to him, Adam said, This is now bone of my bones. This is now flesh of my flesh. The Creator then united the first man and woman, his husband and wife, saying, Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother, be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.

Then God blessed them, and God said, Be fruitful, multiply, fill the earth. And so, the institution of marriage and the cycle of human life began with God's personal blessing. That's another thing we learned from Genesis, the first two or three chapters. God personally looks down and bless their marriage. And when we get married and we dedicate our marriage to God, God will become a part of that marriage. God will bless that marriage. It says, Within the church it is God, not merely man or the law of man, who joined together husband and wife as one flesh. Therefore, let us now consider the laws of God governing this union and his instructions to husband and wives as recorded in the Holy Scriptures. Now, that's sort of the introduction to the wedding ceremony.

But I think it's a good introduction to the sermon. We shall now consider some of the laws and principles concerning marriage and what the Bible says. Actually, as you read through Genesis 1, 2, and 3 in the Bible, you find the basic laws of marriage are articulated right here, or they are implied.

What am I talking about? Well, let me just enumerate them for you. Number one, the family unit is defined by God in Genesis 2, not by man. Today, we have all kinds of legislation and people saying, well, I believe in family values. And when you ask them what a family is, well, to them, a family can be a man or a man living together, a woman and a woman living together. There are all kinds of odd situations, whereas God ordained from the very beginning man and woman. Secondarily, it shows that we have one mate. We don't have two or three. God never intended polygamy. Number three, the husband's in charge. You find that from the very beginning.

Number four, the wife is to submit to her husband.

Number five, there is to be no unfaithfulness in the marriage.

And then six, there should not be deviate sex in the marriage.

Seven, you are to leave your father and mother, and your desire should be for your mate. And then you find another principle articulated here, the wife is to be a helper.

And then finally, that is not good for a man to be alone.

We men get in trouble when we're alone. We need help.

I need all kinds of help that Norma helps me with. So we need help.

Let's take a look. I won't go through every one of these, but let's take a look at some of the basic principles established by God from the very beginning.

And let's see what God has to say about them.

Number one is the family unit as defined by God.

God is the one who defines the family unit, and God defines it as male-female.

Then he says, reproduce, multiply. That means have children.

So a man is not perfectly compatible for a man.

God, when He created the woman, He said He made a helper who was perfectly compatible, comparable to the man.

So you find from the very beginning that God did not intend homosexuality. That was not His purpose.

He created a woman and a man to have a family unit.

Nowhere were animals created to cohabit with humans.

So God did not create that dynamic either.

You might hold your place here. Let's go over to Leviticus 18.

Leviticus 18, beginning in verse 22. And I want you to notice what God mentions here in the Torah concerning the principles I've been talking about here.

Verse 22 says, As you shall not lie with a male as with a woman, it is an abomination.

Then verse 23, Nor shall you mate with any animal to defile yourself with it, Nor shall any woman stand before an animal to mate with it. It is perversion.

Do not defile yourself with any of these things, for by all these the nations are defiled, which I am casting out before you. For the land is defiled, therefore I visit the punishment of its iniquity upon it, and the land vomits out the inhabitants. So God says, You shall therefore keep my statutes and my judgments, and shall not commit any of these abominations, neither any of your own nation or any stranger who dwells among you. For all of these abominations the men of the land have done, who were before you, thus the land is defiled. So God goes ahead and shows that he was going to cast those people out of the land because of these types of sins.

As I said today, we have all kinds of definitions as to what constitute a family.

Marriage is a family relationship based upon the God-level relationship.

Marriage should be a type of the God-level relationship.

You'll find immediately we have what? We have father, well, we have first of all husband and wife, but then once they have children, you have fathers and mothers, you have children.

God is a family, we learn, and God is adding to his family.

In the New Testament, we read that God tells us that if you will obey me, I will be a father to you, and you will be my sons and my daughters.

You'll find that God is the one who established the family relations.

If you take a look at history, you'll find mankind cut off from God.

You'll find that marriage and the principles surrounding marriage degenerate, become compromised, become corrupted.

Let's back up here to chapter 4 in the book of Genesis, verse 16.

One of the first things you find is polygamy.

Now, we know that God allowed polygamy, but polygamy is not what God intended from the very beginning.

In Genesis 4, 16, this is giving you the lineage of Cain.

Remember Cain was driven out of Eden, out of the land of Eden, and he was sent over to the land of Nod.

Cain went out from the presence of the Lord and dwelt in the land of Nod, east of Eden.

Cain, Yui's wife, she conceived, bore Enoch.

And he built a city named the name of the city after the name of his son Enoch.

And to Enoch was born Irad, and Irad begotten Mahujael, and Mahujael begotten Methuzeel, and Methuzeel begotten Lamech.

Then Lamech took for himself two wives.

The name of the one was Ada, and the name of the second was Zilla.

This is the first recorded case of polygamy in the Bible.

Lamech is married to two different women.

Now did he have problems? You bet he had problems with polygamy.

But it's simply recorded here.

In chapter 6, you find that God finally brings a flood on the earth to destroy mankind.

In chapter 6 of the book of Genesis, it says, It was going to be 120 years, and God was going to bring the flood.

So you find here that man married whoever he wanted, whoever he chose.

And in verse 5, the Lord saw that the wickedness of man was great in the earth, and that every intent of the thought of the heart was only evil continually.

This is the strongest statement recorded in the Bible. Notice it. The wickedness of man is great.

So God doesn't say, you know, it's not too bad. No, He says it's great in the earth that every intent of the thoughts of his heart was only evil continually.

How can you say it any stronger than that? They had totally corrupted themselves.

And then in verse 10, we find, This is the generation of Noah. Noah was a just man, perfect in his generation, and walked with God. Noah begot three sons, Shem, Ham, and Japheth, and the earth was corrupt before God, and the earth was filled with violence.

And God looked upon the earth, and indeed it was corrupt, for all flesh had corrupted their way on the earth.

The flood came 1656 years after creation. So what you find here is very soon man corrupted his way before God.

Now, all of this happened before the flood. Now, let's go over to Genesis chapter 10, verse 8 after the flood. Genesis chapter 10, verse 8, Cush begot Nimrod, and he began to be a mighty one on the earth.

Now, according to tradition and historical sources, you find that Nimrod married Cimaramas.

Cush was married to Cimaramas. They had a son named Nimrod. Nimrod turns around and marries his own mother, and he totally perverted the institution of marriage.

And Nimrod and Cimaramas then are the ones who set up the Babylonian mystery religious system that has dominated the world since the time of the flood. They brought over and perpetuated the way of Cain before the flood, after the flood. And so you find, very shortly after the flood, the perversion of marriage and the walls surrounding marriage. Chapter 18, Genesis 18, verse 20, you find it talks here about Sodom and Gomorrah.

So 451 years after the flood, you have two whole cities, Sodom and Gomorrah, dedicated to homosexuality. And here was Lot living among them. So man had corrupted his way upon the earth.

In the book of Jude, let's go back to the book of Jude, in the Bible, right before the book of Revelation. In the book of Jude, verse 7, it says, Sodom and Gomorrah, and the cities around them, in a similar manner to these, having given themselves over to sexual immorality, and have gone after strange flesh, are set forth as an example, suffering the vengeance of eternal fire. Likewise, also these dreamers defiled the flesh, reject authority, speak evil of dignitaries.

And so you find he addresses what happened then, and compares it to what was going on in that day. Now in 2 Timothy, chapter 3, we find a prophecy here concerning the end times. And I want you to notice what the Bible indicates would be transpiring at the end of the age. This is the period of time that you and I live in today. 2 Timothy, chapter 3, Headstrong, haughty, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, having a form of godliness, but denying the power, from such turn away. For this sort are those who creep into households and make captives of gullible women, loaded down with sins, led away by various lusts. And so again, showing that at the end time, the same type of sexual sins and lack of love, and people wanting to just seek their own desires, would be performed. Jeremiah, chapter 5, in Jeremiah 5, we find beginning in verse 7, a prophecy.

And this was a prophecy concerning what was going on back in that day, but also for the future. In verse 7, How shall I pardon you for this? Your children have forsaken me, God says, and sworn by those that are not gods, when I had fed them to the full.

And what you find when God blesses His people, as we have been blessed as a country, blessed to the full, have plenty to eat. They have committed adultery and assembled themselves by troops in the harlot's house. They were like well-fed lusty stallions, everyone naid after his neighbor's wife.

Shall I punish them for these things, says the Lord? And shall I not avenge myself on such a nation as this? And he goes on to talk about the house of Israel and the house of Judah. The both were guilty of these sins. You see, Satan the devil has wanted to destroy proper marital relationships. He is a pervert. Let's just be blunt. He is celibate. He can't marry. The angels do not marry. He encourages mankind to follow the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes. Satan wants to make marriage, wants to bring it down to an animal relationship, just cohabitation, period, and not an institution filled with love and giving and service. So rather than you find that it is God who has established the family relationship, he established the marital unit, and you find that man has misused that and abused it. You and I have the standards here in the Scriptures, in the Bible, to show us what it should be based upon. Now let's proceed on here. Another principle I mentioned to you that the Bible very clearly talks about is we should have one mate. Not two, three, four, five, a dozen, three hundred, a thousand. That's not what God said. Come back to Genesis 2, beginning in verse 21. I want you to notice that God did not create two Eves for one Adam.

And God did not create two Adam's for one Eve. He created a man. He created a woman. And in verse 21, God caused a deep sleep to fall on Adam, and He took one of His ribs. Now I don't know if there's any significance, but notice how this is worded. He took one rib. He didn't take two ribs or three ribs and create two or three different women. And verse 22 says, Then the rib which the Lord God had taken from man, He made a woman. Singular, one woman. And notice, verse 23, Adam said, This is now bone of my bone, flesh of my flesh. She, not they, He didn't say, They shall be called women, but she shall be called woman. So again, singular. And verse 24, Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother, be joined to his wife, and they, the man and the woman, shall become one flesh. How can you be one flesh if you're married to two people or three people? You can't.

So you find that God established the principle that in marriage you should have one mate. And this was established from the very beginning. We don't stop sometimes and think about some of these principles in Genesis 1 and 2, but they're there. Now, the principle that the husband is in charge, I think, is also implied here in chapter 2. Notice in verse 18, The Lord God said, It's not good that the man should be alone. I will make him a helper comparable to him. Now, notice the woman was created to be a helper to the man. It doesn't say, I'll make a woman and the man will become her helper.

Now, in marriage, you do help one another, but God created the man. And the office of the woman was established so that she could help or assist the man. It implies that she would be submissive to the man that he would be in charge. Let's go over to Ephesians chapter 5 that we're all familiar with. Ephesians 5.22. And you'll notice how the Apostle Paul states this. Ephesians chapter 5, beginning in verse 22. We read, Wives, submit to your own husbands as to the Lord. For as the husband is the head of the wife, as also Christ is the head of the church, and he is the Savior of the body. So we find that the wife is to submit, the husband is the head, and Jesus Christ is, just as Jesus Christ is, the head of the church.

Now, I didn't write this down, but let's go over... Let me make sure I have the right scripture here.

Yes, 1 Corinthians chapter 11, beginning in verse 1. 1 Corinthians chapter 11. And we will begin to read here in verse 1. It says, Imitate me just as I also imitate Christ. So Paul is saying, in the King James Version, I think it says, You follow my example, you know what I do, but here, imitate me. Only as he imitated Christ. Now, I praise you, brethren, that you remember me in all things and keep the traditions just as I delivered them to you.

Now, I want you to know that the head of every man is Christ. So now there is a pecking order. The head of the man is Christ, the head of the woman is the man, and the head of Christ is God. So you have God the Father, you have Jesus Christ, you have man, and then you have woman. Then it goes on to talk about that every man praying or prophesying, having his head covers, dishonors his head.

So who is his head? Jesus Christ. So if you pray or prophesy, having your head covered. Having your head covered means having long hair. But notice, it goes on to say in verse 6, For if a woman is not covered, let her also be shorn. But if it be a shame for a woman to be shorn or shaved, let her be covered.

For a man, indeed, ought not to cover his head, since he is in the image and glory of God, but the woman is the glory of the man. For the man is not from the woman, but the woman from the man. Nor was man created for the woman, but the woman for the man.

So again, we see the authority there. For this reason, the woman ought to have a symbol of authority on her head because of the angels, referring to protection from the angels. Now notice, going on to verse 13, Judge among yourself is a proper for a woman to pray to God with her head uncovered. Does not even nature itself teach you that if a man has long hair, it is a dishonor to him? But if a woman has long hair, it is a glory, for her hair is given to her for a covering.

So this isn't talking about the fact you have to wear a beanie or a hat or throw a veil over your head as far as a woman coming to church. Now, a woman's hair is given to her for a covering. So this is the reason why a woman should have longer hair. Otherwise, it says she might as well be shorn or shaved. Whereas a man should have short hair because he is in the image of God.

And the shorter hair symbolizing that he is under the authority of Christ. Now, you'll find, let's back up to Ephesians 5 again, that the husband is in charge, as verse 23 shows here. He is to be the head. But do you know what that implies when it comes to a man? That the husband is to be the benefactor of the home. He is to be the benefactor.

A man should prepare himself to be the head of the home. When a man gets married, a woman should expect when she marries a man that he is going to bring certain things into that marriage. He brings a career. He brings the ability to work. He is going to provide for her. He is prepared to be a blessing to the wife.

So therefore, he has prepared himself through education, through work, by developing his skills, his abilities. When a woman comes to share his home, she should know her state. She should have some idea of what she is in for. She should know what to expect. I want you to notice verse 23 again.

It says, The husband is the head of the wife, as also Christ is the head of the church, and he is the Savior of the body. Many men are willing to be the head of the wife, but not the Savior of the wife. Give me the authority. Men, a lot of times, will abuse that authority. God never set a man over his wife to be a dictator, to abuse his wife. A Savior is one who protects, one who provides, one who encourages, a leader, one who is full of mercy.

The Greek word for Savior means a deliverer, a preserver. So the husband is there to deliver, to preserve, to look after his wife. Not be a demagogue. He doesn't tear down, but he preserves, he builds up, he encourages. So you find then, very clearly, that the husband is in charge, but he does it, and must do it in a godly manner. This is the way God intended. Down through the years, sad to say, this is not the way it's been exercised in society around this. Now we find that the wife is to submit to her husband. Now let's notice why we're still here in Ephesians.

Verse 24, Therefore, just as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands, in everything, in everything that they do. Now, in verse 29, it says, For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as the Lord does the church. For we are members of his body, of his flesh, of his bones. For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother, be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh. This is a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ and the church.

What you find is that God gave marriage and the institution of marriage to teach man and woman in that family unit about the kingdom of God, the family of God. If mankind, from the very beginning, had remained faithful to God, lived by his law, every family unit, every child growing up, would learn that this marriage, what my parents are doing, when I get married, that this is a type of what the relationship between Christ and the church should be, and that we have a Savior. Let's go over to 1 Corinthians 6. We'll begin to read in verse 15.

2. He says, 1. Shall become one flesh. So in marriage, your wife is the only one that you should have relationships with. We'll get into this a little later. 2. He who is joined to the Lord is one Spirit with him. The point I want to bring out is that the marital relationship, even though it is a physical relationship, is a type of what should be in the church where we become one with Christ through the Holy Spirit. God gives us his Spirit. That Spirit gives us the mind of God, gives us the outlook of God. We come to have the mind of God, and it's the same type of thing within a marriage. You and I, as verse 20 says, has been bought with a price. Therefore glorify God in your body, in your spirit, which are God. So we have a giving Savior who loved us to the degree that he was willing to give his life for us. A husband must be willing to give his life for his wife and for his family. Our marriages have been given to us for us to strive to picture the God-playing relationship between Christ and his church. And that's a tall order. That's something that you and I constantly strive to be and to do.

Another point we read back in the book of Genesis is there is to be no unfaithfulness in the marriage. No unfaithfulness. A man is to leave his father and his mother. He is to be united with his wife. And they are to become one flesh. Not two flesh, nor three flesh, but one flesh.

Now, let's notice back here in Genesis 19.

Genesis chapter 19.

You find the situation here with Sodom and Gomorrah.

And it's one of those situations where, again, you find sexual perversion, but you also find a misunderstanding, corruption of what marriage is all about.

If marriage is a type of Jesus Christ in the Church, ask yourself the question, Is Jesus Christ unfaithful to the Church? If we as a Church are the bride of Christ, is He unfaithful to us? And we know immediately that the answer is no.

Should we be unfaithful to Him? And conversely, the answer is no. So on the spirit level, we understand that there is a commitment, is there not?

One of the great lessons, one of the major lessons we learn in marriage, is to make a total commitment to that individual. Today in marriage, you find that people get married, and they're not committed to one another. They're not committed to the marriage. Something goes bad, problems arise, I'm out of here. It's like they're in an airplane flying, they've got a parachute on. In the first hint of trouble, they jump out the door, and they make a run for it. Well, you and I are in the airplane, we don't have a parachute. You don't have anywhere to go, but to make sure that plane flies. And you and I are in a marriage, and we've got to make sure that marriage works, that it goes straight. And so you have no other objective. You can't jump out. And God wants to make it work. God is faithful. As we find back here in Hebrews 13, notice Hebrews 13, beginning in verse 5. Hebrews 13, says, So we may boldly say, the Lord is my helper. I'll not fear what man can do to me. So God has said, He'll never leave us or forsake us. He's there for the long run. As long as we remain faithful, God will be there, and He will bring us into His kingdom. You find in 1 Corinthians 6, I didn't read all of this scripture a while ago, verse 13. 1 Corinthians 6 and verse 13. Notice, it says, Food for the stomach, the stomach for foods, but God will destroy both it and them. Now, the body is not for sexual immorality, but for the Lord, and the Lord for the body. Our bodies were not created for sexual immorality. They were created so that we could receive God's Spirit. So we are not to be sexually immoral. Now, let's back up to Genesis 2 again. We've read this in several places. In Genesis 2 and verse 24, we find again another principle articulated back here in the book of Genesis concerning marriage. Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother, be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.

The Bible says that you and I are to leave and cleave. So we are to leave the old unit. We are to cleave to the new unit. That's basically what it's saying. Okay, now notice the word leave. You have to leave your parents' unit.

We're all blessed to have parents. They gave us life. They rear us. We come of age. We get married. You leave that unit. You establish your own. You're now a separate unit. This implies a new unit. A separate unit. A separate family unit. Now, one thing that happens, though, a lot of times people will get married, but they will not leave their former family. They might leave physically, bodily, but they don't leave mentally and emotionally. They're still attached. And they're attached to mama, or they are attached to papa.

And they've never left them. So we've got to leave in every way. And then, as it says here, be joined to his wife, or as it's translated, to cleave to his wife. To cleave to something means you cleave to it. You hold to it. You're joined to it. Actually, I think in both languages, Hebrew and Greek, it implies a welding together, a gluing together.

It's almost like a poxy glue, if you're familiar with that. You take two different components, you mix them up, you put them together, and once you've got a glue that you can't pull apart, well, that's the way that marriage is to become.

When you and I receive the Holy Spirit, there is no power in the universe that can separate us from God. We are joined to God. And the only way that there can be a separation is if you veil out. But, you know, Satan, trials, tests, all of these things will not separate us. But you and I are to cleave to one another.

We're to do it physically, mentally, and emotionally. Men, your wife, should be the apple of your eye. She should be your desire and vice versa. You've made a commitment to each other. You're committed to the marriage, you're committed to make it work. There is a caring for one another. And then it says you shall become one flesh. She is the one and only one that you have sexual relations with.

You need to have a one flesh attitude. You should be a one woman man. A one woman man. In fact, when it comes to ordaining a man as an elder, that's one of the requirements. That he be a one woman man. So that he's not out here looking after others. And a woman should be a one man woman. He works both ways. And I think you'll find that this actually is a prohibition against polygamy.

Now, also we find in verse 18 of Genesis, we could go ahead and cover some of these other points, but I think I've touched on most of them. But you find that a wife is a helper. In chapter 2 of the book of Genesis, that God made the wife a helper. Now, I want you to notice it doesn't say God made the woman a slave.

A woman is not a slave to her husband. Seems like in the early days of the church, many women or many men got the idea, I'm in charge. And so it was almost like, me, Tarzan, Eugene. And they wanted to show their authority. And the wife said, Well, I think maybe something else should be done or better. You find what the man would do is, you shut up, I'm in charge. And he would tell her, sit down. Down through the century, women had been treated as slaves. They'd been treated as property, something to be used by a man. A man must allow his wife to help him.

If she's going to be a helper, he must, first of all, realize he needs help, where he needs help. Marriage is a team, a man and a woman working together, working to produce a loving relationship. Women bring many attributes and strengths to a marriage. You need to use her strengths. When you get married, a man brings strengths, a woman brings strengths. You also bring weaknesses and weaknesses. Hopefully, your strengths cover the wife's weaknesses and her strengths cover yours. Because the two of you, putting your strengths together, become much stronger. If you both have the same strengths and the same weaknesses, you're not going to be as strong as you could be.

You bring strengths to the marriage, and you need to learn to use those. You're not competing with one another. That's the problem today. Women, liberalism today, are women trying to prove that they're just as good as a man. Nobody ever said that a woman isn't. But it's not a matter of competing. It's a matter of helping. It's a matter of assisting one another. A woman, a young girl growing up, if you have young girls still at home, are children. A woman should prepare herself to be a helper. Because the Bible is very clear about the role of a wife, what she should do, what she brings to a marriage, how to clean a house, how to cook, child rearing, how to sew, how to decorate. She needs to develop her skills and talents. Is that all that a woman can do? Certainly not. She may have many, many other skills and talents that she can bring to a marriage or to the workforce. But these are some of the things that are basic skills that are needed by a woman in a marriage. And so, as she is growing up, she needs to be prepared in these areas. Norma and I only had five sons. We never had any girls. So, as they grew up, she taught them all how to do basic cooking, how to wash clothes, how to make beds, how to straighten the house up. We didn't have girls. So, before they went to school in the morning, they had to have their beds made. They had to have all their clothes picked up, toys put away. And maybe they made their own lunches. They washed clothes. They folded clothes. I don't know how many times their wives have come to us and said, I really appreciate you teaching my husband how to fold clothes, how to wash clothes, do some of those basic, fundamental things. Well, the same thing goes the other way. That a man doesn't want to marry a woman who doesn't have any skills, any talents, any ideas about the womanly art of being a woman, or a mother, or a wife. Those are skills that should be developed, just as a man should develop his skills. And he should grow up learning a trade, learning certain skills, take care of the car, the house, whatever it might be. Now, having said all of that, you also learn from Genesis 1-3 something basic. That is, that the basis of all relationships are based upon one word, and it's called love. Love is the glue that must be in all marriages to help hold them together. Let's finish up by going back to Ephesians 5 again. Ephesians 5, verse 1. And I want you to notice here, Ephesians 5, verse 1.

When God created the heavens and the earth, re-created it in the earth in Genesis 1, placed man on it, and animals, the fauna and the flora, and God did all of that, was that not the epitome of God's love that He extended towards us? Now, notice in verse 25, husbands loved your wives just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her. So, you find that we are to love our wives, verse 28. So, husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies. For He who loves His wife loves Himself. If you are one flesh, when you love your wife, you are loving yourself. For no one ever hated His own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it just as the Lord does the church. So, again, we have the church as the basis and the example. So, we find here that we are to love our wives. The Bible commands the wife to love her husband, likewise. You know, if the Bible commands us to love our neighbors ourselves, what kind of love should we have for our mate? If we are to love the Lord our God with all our heart, all our soul, all of our might, and love our neighbors ourselves, then you and I are to love our mate, equally as much as we love ourselves. If we could just do that one thing, you'd be surprised how much it would add to our marriages. So, brethren, the overall arching principle of how to have a good marriage is there must be love in that marriage. And that's what's going to hold everything together. Love is an action word, and that's a completely different sermon that we could get involved with and need to here in the future. Love is not a passive word. It's not just a word that you talk about. Love is putting principles into action. And so, when we say that we are to love our wives, it simply means that there are certain actions that we need to take. So, brethren, let's realize that God, from the very beginning, intended that men have happy marriages, that women have happy marriages. And to the degree that we apply the basic fundamental principles of God articulated in the Bible, we will have good marriages. So, let's apply those principles and ask God to bless us and help us to have wonderful marriages.