Reconciliation and Relationships

Well, maybe it's appropriate that I begin my sermon today talking about relationships. You know, for those of you who have been in the church for a while, maybe it was ten years ago, there was a study done by an outside firm that was commissioned by the Council of Elders to...where they talked to many ministers, reviewed our doctrines, listened to sermons, to tell us what is it, the message that we should be getting across to people, what is the message of the Bible as we saw it.

And the thing they came down to as they filtered all that out was what we talk about and what we preach about and what the Bible is about is about meaningful and godly relationships.

And when you think about relationships and what we talk about and what the Bible says, that's exactly what it's about, isn't it? God is a God of relationships. When you read in Revelation about all the heavenly hosts and how they interact and how they are up in heaven, what you see are perfect relationships. They love each other, they get along with one another, there's perfect unity, there's perfect harmony, they're totally committed to the same purpose.

And that purpose now is what's going here on earth, what is God preparing here and among mankind. But it's a perfect, perfect relationship that's up there and it's marked by joy. And that joy comes from those perfect relationships that are up there. By contrast, we can look at the world around us. We're here on Memorial Day weekend and on Monday.

The country will honor the veterans, people who have fought in the wars. And that's a very noble thing to honor those who have died, that freedoms could be contained or maintained, I guess, in our society. But war really is a story of broken relationships. Nation that couldn't get along with nation, people that can't get along with other people, kingdom that can't get along with other kingdom.

And so the legacy of the world is it has a history of wars, a history of broken relationships, and those pass down to people as well. We don't live in a world that is marked by the joy that God wanted to come from relationships. When He created man and woman and He made and He created them male and female, He wanted to bring them together and He wanted them to enjoy a perfect relationship. He wanted them to learn how to get along with one another, how to work with one another. He wanted them to grow together and bond together as one. He wanted to see them develop and become everything they could be.

That's what He wanted when He created male and female. That's what He wanted when He created mankind so that they would be able to live together and work together and live in a world of peace and harmony and joy. It didn't happen that way. When He created marriage, the Bible tells us, He even created that to be a picture of the relationship between Christ and the church. That brings it home to you and me. That's how close He wanted the church to be with Jesus Christ. Just like the marriage relationships, pictures between a man and woman, that they would grow together and do things God's way, living by His principles, living by what He has taught them to do, and that He preserves and gives us in the Bible today.

That's what He wanted. Hasn't always happened that way. It was so important to Him that mankind would learn these relationships that He gave Ten Commandments. Ten Commandments that would form the basis of our morals and our lives. Just ten. And how did Jesus Christ summarize those Ten Commandments? He said, they're summarized by, Love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your mind, and all your soul.

Have a relationship with Him, and here's the principles you can use to do that. Because God wants to have a right relationship and a good relationship with mankind. And He said the second is like it. Love your neighbor as yourself. Love your neighbor as yourself. B, show that love to them because He intended that relationships on earth would mirror those in heaven. And if we would just follow those principles, if mankind would just have followed those principles in life, how different this world would be. We wouldn't have a world that's marked by divorces. We wouldn't have a world that's marked by conflict. We wouldn't have a world where people were picking at each other and doing all the things that promote disunity.

But we'd have a world that was picturing unity, and we would all be much happier, and we would all be enjoying our lives, and we would all listen to the things around us, and we would feel positive, hopeful, focused on the future and all that it could bring. But in that perfect environment when God created Adam and Eve, and they were walking in the Garden of Eden, and those beautiful pictures that you see back in Genesis 1 and 2, it was all destroyed.

Satan entered. Satan had man, or convinced man to sin against God, and all that happiness, all that peace, all that unity, all that harmony, all those relationships, good relationships, disappeared, disappeared. And into the world entered strife and pride and heartbreak and death and misery and self-absorption and all the other things that you could imagine, all of which destroyed relationships.

It's not the way God wanted it, and that's not what we have been called to foster in our lives. We've been called to come out of that way of life, to build relationships, that our marriages should be stronger as a result of being in the church and following God's way. Our relationships with each other should be growing stronger as we get to know each other and as we're bond together by God's Holy Spirit.

That love should be growing, and Jesus Christ even said, this is how people will know you are my disciples. The love you have for one another, the relationships they see among you, they will know there's something different. There's something different. But that isn't the way it always is. And God didn't give up on the world. We can be thankful to Him for that. You know, John 3, 16, no one needs to turn there.

It says, God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son that who so should believe in Him should not perish but have everlasting life. God still loved the world despite the fact that man rejected Him. He still sent Jesus Christ to earth, so He would live and He could die and He could open the door to us and all of mankind.

Even though mankind shut the door on God, and by our actions, before we were called, repented and baptized and walked with the Holy Spirit, we shut the door on God many times. Let's go back to Romans, Romans 5. Romans 5, beginning in verse 8. Familiar Scriptures. It talks about God's love for mankind. It says, God still wants and God still intends to have a relationship with mankind. He has a relationship with us, but with all of mankind. Verse 8, Romans 5.

But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us. Now, if we just stop there and think about that verse for a moment. We sinned against God. Isaiah 59, verse 1, tells us, sin separates us from God. What? That there's a wall that goes up. When we sin and we reject God, there's a wall that goes up.

If someone sins against us, if someone offends us, if someone says something to us, if someone does whatever it is, sometimes a wall goes up between us. And it's difficult to bring that wall down. Sometimes the other person doesn't even know what that wall is or how it went up. But when God, while we were still sinners, while we had that wall up and we're the ones who put it there, He never changed.

While that wall was still there, He loved us so much that He sent His Son to earth to die for us.

In verse 9, it says, much more than having now been justified by His blood, our sins can be forgiven. They can be wiped out because of what He did, not because of anything we could do. We have earned all of us the death penalty. And it's only by Christ's death and God's mercy on us that we have our sins forgiven. Much more than having now been justified by His blood, we will be saved from wrath through Him. For if when we were enemies, that's a pretty strong word, isn't it? Enemies. When we were enemies with God.

And that's how He saw us. That's how we saw God. That's how the world sees God. Mr. Johnson was talking about some of the attitudes in England, and we can see them well over here in this country as well. People don't want God. God, they don't want to do what He says. They want to do what they want to do. Sometimes in the name of God and they ascribe to Him things that are nowhere in the Bible. But even while we were enemies to God, and we were all in that state before God called us. Enemies to Him. Enemies. We were reconciled to God through the death of His Son.

Much more having been reconciled, we will be saved by His life. Well, we know that Jesus Christ's death, He paid the price for our sins. He paid the death penalty for us.

But His death also brought about the opportunity for reconciliation. Reconciliation. A key word. A key word when we're looking to resolve conflicts, build back relationships, renew relationships. Reconciliation.

Now, it was God. It was God who took the first step in reconciliation. We were the ones who offended Him.

We're the ones who sinned, not Him. And yet He took the first step to open the door up for us, and all mankind, to be reconciled to Him. And He paid a steep price for it. Our sins could be forgiven, but He also opened the door to reconciliation. It should have been the offender who seeks reconciliation, but it was God who knew what we needed, and out of His love and His desire to have a relationship with mankind, opened the door and paid the price. Let's finish up here in verse 11.

And not only that, but we also rejoiced in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have received, or now received, the reconciliation. Everyone of us in this room have received the reconciliation.

If we have Heeded God's call, if we have repented, and remember repentance means turning from your way to God's way, if we've been baptized and if we received the Holy Spirit, we're reconciled to God.

He opened the door. Now, not all of mankind has been reconciled. They'll have the opportunity for reconciliation, too, because Christ didn't die just that we might be reconciled. But for those of us who the Bible calls first fruits today, now is the time for our reconciliation. Let me read to you.

I'll first draw your attention to forgiveness and reconciliation. The Bible talks a lot about forgiveness. In the model prayer that Christ gave in Matthew 6, He said, if you won't forgive others, their sins, I'm not going to forgive your sins either. So we know that we need to forgive each other. Is forgiveness the same as reconciliation? No, it's not. We can forgive someone, right? We can forgive someone, but we may never see that person again. How many people have been wronged by someone who is no longer living? But in our hearts, we have to forgive and not hold grudges against them, not be in the state that we become bitter against them or hate them. It's our job to forgive. They may never be able or they may be living and unwilling to forgive us or even accept that forgiveness, but in our hearts, we must forgive others. When Jesus Christ was on that stake, He said, Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do. They didn't ask for forgiveness. They didn't even know what they were doing. And yet He forgave them and He said, Father, forgive them.

So forgiveness is one thing. We all must practice forgiveness. It's got to be part of our lives, part of what we do, because we realize that when we deal with human beings and each other, and when you deal with me, you're dealing with imperfect human beings, and we are going to make mistakes. Forgiveness is not the same as reconciliation as part of reconciliation, but reconciliation is another step. It's when the parties come together and the parties renew a relationship, and that is restored. God forgives our sins. He wants a relationship. He paid the price for that door to be open, and He wants that reconciliation with mankind, but mankind has to acknowledge what is going on in his life. He has to understand and admit what he's done to break that relationship, and then part of reconciliation there's a part to play on the other hand as well. Let me read to you from Vines about this word, this reconciliation, here in Romans 5. There are two words that we're going to look at, because reconcile shows up many times in the Bible, but they have slightly different meanings, and it has to do with the parties involved. This one here in Romans 5, it comes from the Greek word katalage, specifically comes from the Greek word katalasso, means primarily in exchange. Vines says this denotes a change on the part of one party induced by an action on the part of another. So when God sent Jesus Christ to earth, He induced reconciliation. He paid the price. He opened the door, and He was looking that that's a change on the part of one party induced by an action on the part of another.

When He did that, there was supposed to be an exchange. If we're going to accept that reconciliation, we need to do something in return. Throughout the Bible, we find these corollary or complementary, I guess, actions. If we repent, it's not just a matter of so many churches say, just say a little repairer, say, I'm sorry for what I've done, and God forgives you. Yes, He forgives, but you have to turn to Him. And a reconciliation is not a matter of just, I accept your reconciliation, which Jesus Christ did. You have to turn. You have to be the other party to that reconciliation. He goes on to say, in the New Testament, the reconciliation of men to God is by His grace and the love of Christ. God took the first action in reconciliation. And I'll add, He was the offended party. Remember that we sinned against Him. It was our iniquity, our sin that separated us, that made us enemies with God, if you will. Over in 2 Corinthians 5, we find Paul talking about reconciliation. And again, some verses that you're quite familiar with.

Let's pick it up in 2 Corinthians 5 and verse 17.

2 Corinthians 5 verse 17. Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation.

We'll talk about that in baptism. When we're baptized and our sins are forgiven, we come up out of the waters of baptism. God looks at us as a brand new creation. If anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. Old things have passed away. Behold, all things have become new.

Verse 18. Now all things are of God, who has reconciled us to Himself through Jesus Christ.

Same word, catalasso. Has reconciled us to Himself through Jesus Christ and has given us the ministry of reconciliation. Now, looking at Jung's literal translation, they translate this verb, or there's a direct word-for-word translation from the Greek. It says, And all things are of God, who reconciled us to Himself through Jesus Christ, and did give to us the ministration of reconciliation. He gave to us that responsibility of ministering, or talking about, or witnessing, or preaching about that reconciliation.

We received it. He expects that we will pass it on to others. That truth, and that we will live it, of course, as well. Let's go on here in the Bible you have in your lap.

Verse 19. That is, that God was in Christ reconciling the world to Himself, not imputing their trespasses to them, and is committed to us the word of reconciliation.

He forgave sins. He didn't impute to them their sins and say, you're going to pay for those anyway. But He gave to us the spirit, or the word, the ministering of the word of reconciliation. The Jung's literal translation from the Greek says, He has put in us the word of the reconciliation. He has put in us the knowledge of what He has done to us, something that should motivate us, something that should spur us on to continuing in that reconciliation, the way we walk with Him, the way we act, the things that we do, the repentance that we talk about, the changed life, committing to Him and allowing Him to change us and correct us, and pray for that correction too. Not run away from correction, but pray for that correction if we truly want to become more like Him. And He has given us the word of reconciliation, or put in us the word of reconciliation. Verse 20 now then, we are ambassadors for Christ. As though God were pleading through us, we implore you on Christ's behalf, be reconciled to God.

He has put that knowledge in us. He has given us that we have accepted that word of reconciliation. The world doesn't know reconciliation yet. They know something about it. They don't understand their part in it. But He would tell us, you need the Church of God to let people know what the reconciliation is. They need to understand their part in it. We need to understand our part in it. We need to do the things that God has called us to do. We need to truly be part. And truly, God has opened the door to reconciliation, that we are doing the things that He wants us to do.

God has done it for us. He has given us the opportunity. His Holy Spirit leads us and guides us in that reconciliation to Him. We are the first fruits. The whole world will have the opportunity to do that in the future. And you and I will be teaching them that. We may have the opportunity to teach others today about what that reconciliation is, because God wants relationships healed. His purpose in going through all this, He loves us and His will will be done. But He wants the whole world to come to the point where we all have a relationship with Him. Remember what He said in Jesus Christ in John 17. Several times He said, My will is, Father, that they are one as you and I are one. And that's what He wants, even through the Second Resurrection, even through the White-Drewed Judgment, that those will be reconciled to God and will walk and be with Him in one, in perfect relationships. Relationships that you and I should be developing and practicing today, if we're doing the thing that God wants us to do. And if we really have in us the word of reconciliation. And God has put that in us, which I know He has. Now God does things for us first. You know, we find that there wasn't anything that God asked us to do that He isn't willing to do and Jesus Christ wasn't willing to do as well. He came to earth. He lived in the physical body. He was tempted in all points like as we were. He was willing to go through it all because He can be our intercessor because He understands the temptations. He understands the weakness of the flesh. He understands the lust of the flesh. He understands all those things and He can speak for us and He knows the trials that we go through. And He went through trials that you and I haven't faced today, even from His persecutors. And He wants us and He understands what relationships are like and He wants us to practice reconciliation just like He's given us the reconciliation. Now, we have to be honest. There are occasions in the church that there are conflicts that arise.

And for a while, people may not speak to one another. Certainly in relationships, in the marriage relationship, there can be conflicts that arise. And it's sad when you see people who are at odds with one another. Between friends, there can be conflicts and there can be these disputes that go on. And parties take sides and they stand against each other. It's not God's will. It's that type of spirit that leads to separations and separations in the church. It's never of God. It's never of God when you see people lead the church of God. It's never of God when some go off and do their own thing and think they're still serving God. It's never of Him. He's never about division. Wherever there's division in someone saying, do... whether it's between husband and wife, friend and friend, brother and sister, church member and church member, it's always of Satan. Because God is the God of unity and He expects us to work things out. And He expects us to reconcile with one another, just like He opened the door to reconciliation with us. And He didn't have to. He could have just said, all these humans are just a pain in the neck. They haven't appreciated anything I did and just let them just let them disappear with the world. But He didn't do that because the relationship and what He planned was so important to Him and our relationships at home, our relationships and families, our relationships in church should be the same way. Let's look at a couple things because Christ gives us the acts that we can have with each other. Let's go back to Matthew 18.

Matthew 18 and verse 15.

Matthew 18, the context here. Jesus Christ is talking about little children, talking about in the earlier verses that we need to become converted, just as we become as little children. Teachable. One thing about little children. I remember this when I was growing up and you remember when you were growing up. You could get in a fight with your friends and the next day forget it all happened. There weren't these things that you just, you know, never talking to Him again and mean it. It was just, I'm never talking to Him, but tomorrow I'll be there with them and things will be forgotten and things will, you know, things will be the way that they should be. So in the context of Matthew 18 where it opens up, let's come down to verse 15 and Christ gives us one of the keys to reconciling with brothers. We know we must forgive. He also wants us to reconcile. Verse 15. Let's start with verse 14. Even so, it's not the will of your Father who is in heaven that one of these little ones should perish. Verse 15. Moreover, if your brother sins against you. Now here we have the, here we have Catalaso again. We have someone who has sinned against us, just like we've sinned against God. If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault between you and him alone. We've heard that, right? It doesn't say, if your brother has sinned against you, go and tell your neighbor and get his opinion. Go and tell the church and everyone in the church what he's done and get their opinion. If he's sinned against you, if you've been offended, go to him. The two of you alone, it says. Tell him what it is that he's done to offend you. In some cases, you're going to find it as he has no idea, he or she, has no idea what has been done. A word spoken and it teaches us a lot about our words, what we need to do and how others perceive us. But go to him alone.

Going on to verse 15, look at the relationship. If he hears you, you have gained your brother.

The relationship is healed. If he hears you, if he says, Man, I didn't understand I did that. I'm sorry I did that. I shouldn't have done that. If he hears you and he also takes up that spirit of reconciliation and wants to be one with you, you have gained your brother. If that doesn't happen, if he doesn't have that aspect on him, it goes on and says, What if he won't hear? Take with you two or three more, or one or two more, that by the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established. And then it goes on and says, If that still doesn't work, take it to the church.

And then we'll talk about it in that way. The whole emphasis here is, Restore that relationship. God isn't willing that any perish. He's not willing that any that he calls into the church leave for whatever reason they may leave. He goes on, I think it's in this chapter, and says that, You know, if one number leaves, if you see someone that's not there, then I would take this personally, go after that person. Try to restore them to the body.

Not all of them want to do that, sadly. Some of them just add their minds up, and they just don't want to do this anymore. But he says, Go and try to restore the relationship. In Romans 12, Paul tells us, As much as it is possible, you live in peace with all men. Sometimes that means we have to go out, and we need to take the act of reconciliation. We need to be the peacemaker, and sometimes it can be difficult. But if we would follow the Bible, a lot of the situations that we have would be resolved. Now, that means, and that's something that is important on the part of the one who is offended. In verse 15, he said, If a brother says against you, you're the offended one. Don't get bitter. Don't sit back and condemn.

Go and talk about it. Go and talk about it. We're all humans. We're all learning. We all have things to learn. Not one of us is perfect. We will make mistakes. And if we have God's fear, when we recognize those mistakes, we will admit it. And it's a life lesson for us to turn and not do that anymore. Don't get mad. You might be angry for a moment. Don't be angry too long. Go and talk.

Try to restore that relationship. That's what God would want us to do. Back in Matthew 5, early on in the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus Christ is talking to His disciples, and He's reminding them about the Ten Commandments and putting the spiritual aspect on them and telling them through several chapters, it's not just the physical adherence to the Ten Commandments, but the spiritual application that is important to us. I want to change not just in your actions, but in your mind and heart and the way you are, the way you think, the way you act, the way you react to things. And in verse 20... Let's see where I want to start here. Let's start in verse 21 of Matthew 5. Here He talks about the sin of murder. You have heard that it was said to those of old, You shall not murder, and whoever murders will be in danger of the judgment. Now, we would all agree, right, that murder is a heinous, heinous commandment to break. Unfortunately, we live in a world where we see that happening more and more.

Whoever murders will be in danger of the judgment, but I say to you that whoever is angry with his brother without a cause will be in danger of the judgment. Now, we don't even have these bitterness, this division, these grudges that we hold against one another. And whoever says to his brother, Raka, will be in danger of the council, but whoever says you fool will be in danger of hellfire. He has condemned that person in his mind, and he has shut the door to reconciliation or having that brother back in his life.

Verse 23, Therefore, looking at what the context is talking about, the commandment of murder, therefore, if you bring your gift to the altar, and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar, and go your way. First, be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift. Do you see what Christ is saying there?

It's so important to him that our relationships be restored, that he says, if you know your brother has something against you, you go and be reconciled to him first. Then you come and worship me.

That's the order and the importance he puts on reconciliation and healing those relationships, and doing the same thing for each other that Jesus Christ did for us. You go and heal that relationship. You go. Now, here when it says, you be reconciled to your brother, that's not the Greek katalosso. It's another Greek word that has to do with repentance. This one comes from the Greek verb, dia-losso, dia-losso. It means to affect an alteration, to exchange, to reconcile, in cases of mutual hostility yielding to mutual concession.

Thus, it differs from katalosso that was used in the other verses that we used. In this case, it's different because it's the one who offended who is going to go and open the door of reconciliation.

If your brother has anything, if you have any... Let me read that again, make sure I'm saying it right.

Therefore, if you bring your gift to the altar, remember that your brother has something against you. It's something you did to create a problem, something you did to mislead a little one, something you did to create a division or a breach in a relationship, something you did.

It puts the onus back on us. We have to think about things we've done. It's not all on the offended one. He needs to come and say, too, you know what, you really... you kind of really hurt my feelings when you did this or said this. It set me off. It set me astray, and it made me change who I was. In some cases, it was so bad that they would even stop coming to church because of what we said and maybe words we've spoken. It puts the onus on us, too. If someone has something against you, you go and reconcile with your brother first. Now, that puts some responsibility on us. Let's go back to Matthew 18. We were just there, but this time let's look at verse 6.

In the same context of Christ talking about little children, we need to become like little children, teachable, humble, willing to make up with one another. In verse 6, he says this, Whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him if a millstone were hung around his neck, and he were drowned in the depths of the sea.

Those are some pretty harsh words, aren't they?

And you know, probably all of us at some point in our life, we've said something that might make someone doubt their calling, that might make someone think, I don't want to be here anymore, because we might have said things that they just weren't ready to hear. We have to be very cognizant of what we say, very cognizant of what we say and what we do. And if we look at ourselves, and I've told you, and sometimes I go home, and on some nights I wake up, and I'm recounting every conversation, every word of every conversation I had, if I sensed that something wasn't right in that conversation, did I say something that could have been misconstrued? Did I say something that would have been taken the wrong way?

And probably many of you will get a call somewhere down the line and say, you know, when we were having this conversation, and I said this, what did you think about that?

The reason I do that is because I want to make sure we're on the same page. And if I've said something that you've taken wrong, I want that healed. I don't want those misgivings out there. Sometimes I won't think those things, and if I say it, and I'm going to speak for everyone in this congregation, if anyone ever says anything to you that you don't understand, or you take the wrong way, or you go and talk to them, as it says in Matthew 18, 15, but for all of us, God says, if there's someone who has something against you, you've caused the pain, you've caused the separation, you've caused them to reach the relationship with God, with you, with other church members or whatever. He would say, go and heal it. Go and heal it, then worship me.

Get that relationship back in order as much as it is possible, and sometimes it's not possible, because reconciliation is a two-way street just like forgiveness. Not everyone wants to be reconciled, and that's okay. If we've done something, we ask God to forgive us for us, and we learn it, and we don't make the same mistake again. We also look back in Matthew 12. Matthew 12. Now, verse 36. Another harrowing word that goes right along with what we're talking about here today, and the relationships and how they would be healed. This is talking about words, but you know what actions as well, and decisions we make, and other things else, anything else that would lead to a breach between two brothers. Verse 36, Matthew 12, if I say to you that for every idle word men may speak, they will give account of it in the day of judgment. Now, that should give us pause, that we think before we speak, that we kind of know the person we're speaking to, and we understand some people, you know, you could say anything to them, and they're not going to be offended, and others may, you know, you want to know their points, and their breaking point, that you, just like Paul said, he became all things to all people.

We need to be that way. We need to bear with one another and say, you know what, develop a thick skin. No, they will. They will. When the Holy Spirit leads them to that, but it's not our job to tell them that. It's our job to make sure our words are encouraging, exhorting, and that we keep people moving toward the goal that God has called us to, and that is His kingdom. It's important to God that we do that, and we know when we have offended someone that we drop what we're doing, and we go to Him, or that brother or sister, and try to heal the breach. Try to heal the breach.

When we do that, it's pleasing to God. When we do that, we're doing the same thing that He did for us.

Now, we are practicing the word of reconciliation. Now, we are ministering, or minis... what was the word? Administration. The administration of reconciliation, designed to keep our relationships strong, as much as impossible as is possible that we can do. You know, in looking at this, and looking at this, I had to be reminded of, and I think I mentioned a couple weeks ago, about the 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous. And there are some very good steps, and the reason that people that are afflicted with that problem, or drug addiction, if they stick with the 12 points, they're very biblical points. Very biblical points, and we could apply them to ourselves. And I was thinking about, later down in the list, where some people don't get as far. Let me just kind of briefly read through the 12 steps. I'm going to go down to 8 and 9, because I want to see the proof of aggression. Step 1, we admitted we were powerless over alcohol. Our lives were unmanageable. We came to that point when God called us, right? We came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity. Step 3, we made a decision to turn our will and lives over to the care of God. Step 4, we made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves. That's going to be a tough case, right? I know in working with hospitals where we had AA programs, many people had a problem with that, as they had to go back and they had to examine what they've done and what they need to change in their lives. Step 5, we admitted to God, ourselves, and another human being the nature of our wrongs. Step 6, we were entirely ready to have God remove all of our defects of character. Step 7, we humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.

Step 8, we made a list of all persons we had harmed, and we became willing to make amends to them. That's Matthew 5, 24, isn't it? We looked in our lives and we thought, man, we have really messed up with some people. I've got to go back and I've got to talk to them and I've got to make amends. I've got to heal those relationships. And that is a very humbling thing to do. You can't do it without humility. The pride has to disappear. The self-absorption has to disappear.

We went back and the step is we made a list of persons we had harmed. We became willing to make amends to them. Step 9, we made direct amends to such people who were possible, wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others. We went back and we talked to them. We made a list and we went back and we tried to reconcile with them, except in cases that that couldn't happen.

That's something we need to do in these areas of reconciliation as well.

So the world, or at least this group, understands the importance of Matthew 5.24.

When you've offended, go back. Go back and make it right. God would say, do that and then come and worship me. Then come and worship me. There's an example. You know, when God asks us to do something, He gives us very good examples. Everything in the Old Testament is there as examples to us. There's a very good example of reconciliation back in Genesis. Probably some of you are ahead of me here, but let's go back and let's look at an excellent point or an excellent example of the reconciliation that God is looking for. He would expect all of us, after prayer, after thought, not just running out and doing it, but thinking about it, making a list, praying to God, and letting Him lead us and guide us, and asking Him to lead the whole process, what it would be like. Back in... I'm going to be turning back to Genesis 31. It's the story of Jacob and Esau.

And I don't need to go through a lot of verses on the story of Jacob and Esau. You know they were twin brothers.

You know that Esau, in a moment of weakness, gave up his birthright. He was wrong in not counting the birthright as important as he should. And in a moment of weakness and hunger, he sold or gave Jacob his birthright for a bowl of soup. And Jacob knew how important that birthright was, so he wanted it. Jacob was wrong to even ask for it. And the boys grew up, and later on there came the occasion where the father, Isaac, was going to pass the blessing on, a very important blessing.

That was passed from Abraham to Isaac, and he was going to pass it on to his firstborn son, who was Esau.

And Jacob and his mother actively conspired to steal that blessing from Esau.

And it wasn't by accident. It wasn't that Isaac was fooled. It was so they fooled him. It was an outright act of fevery. And they did everything to deceive.

We can try to get my names right here. Everything they could to deceive Isaac, so that Jacob would get the blessing. So when Esau came back and he learned what had happened, he was rightly very angry with Jacob and wanted to kill him. You can imagine if everything that belonged to you, someone else came and stole you, he would be angry. And so Jacob disappeared. He went to Laban. He went to Laban's house. There he learned some lessons of his own and what the suction could be when he married someone he didn't intend to marry. Then later married Rachel. And while he was there, Jacob became a changed person. He began to follow God. He was very rough diamond, if you will, when he went to Laban. He knew what he had been trained. He had been brought up in the way of God, but he wasn't practicing it, certainly, at that time. But as he was with Laban, apparently he began to understand God and he lived that way. And God richly blessed Laban, well, richly blessed Laban and Jacob as they went through that process. Here in Genesis 31 and verse 13, God appears to Jacob. He now has several sons. He's become a wealthy man because of what God did with the speckled flocks and the, not speckled flocks. In Genesis 13, God says, Jacob, I'm the God of Bethel. Were you anointed the pillar and where you made a vow to me, arise. Get out of this land and return to the land of your family.

Get out of here, Jacob. Go back to the land of Esau. There had been no contact between Jacob and Esau for all those years. Last Jacob saw Esau, Esau wanted to kill him. And Jacob probably realized the magnitude of what he had done and thought, go back to my country where someone wants to kill me. Go back to my country where I have to face something that I did that was wrong. But Jacob proceeded to do that. Over in chapter 32, verse 1, it says, So Jacob went on his way. He followed what God had said. God had told him to do it. And sometimes we have a thought in our minds. And God puts a thought in our mind. Go and reconcile with this person. This is between you and me, or this is standing between you and me. Go back and reconcile with this person. Go back and make it right between husband and wife. Go back and make it right between church member and church member. Go back and make it right between brother and sister. Go back and make it right and acknowledge what you have done. So verse 1, Jacob went on his way, and the angels of God met him. We drop down to verse 3. It says, Then Jacob sent messengers before him to Esau, his brother, and the land of fear, the country of Eden. And he commanded them, saying, Speak thus to my Lord Esau. Thus your servant Jacob says, I had dwelt with Laban, and stayed there until now. I have oxen, donkeys, flocks, and male and female servants, and I have sent to tell my Lord that I might find favor in your sight. Now what did those angels, do you think, tell Jacob? Might it be? I just say, might it be? Because God didn't say, Go back to your land and reconcile with Esau, but then the angels meet him, and all of a sudden he's talking about Esau. He knows he's going to meet Esau there, and he begins the process of reconciliation. And in verses 3 through 5, he's aware of it, but he starts making the plans for that reconciliation.

He sends a message. This is what I need to do. God wants me to reconcile with my brother, and there has been a breach, and I was the one who offended him. Clearly, Matthew 5, 24, Jacob was the offender. Go back and reconcile with Esau. And so he sends this message ahead and says, You know, God has greatly enriched me. I need to do these things.

Or Esau, I want to find favor in your sight. Verse 6, the messengers we came to Jacob sang. We came to your brother Esau, and he also was coming to meet you, and four hundred men are with him. Jacob was greatly afraid and distressed, and he divided the people that were with him, and the flocks and herds and camels into two companies. And he had all these worse thoughts. Man, it's even worse than I thought. And sometimes reconciliation can be a scary thing.

Because we don't know what the response of the other person is going to be, do we? They may blast us and say things to us that will just be very damaging. In this case, Jacob was with, faced with, When I say, Oh, Esau, he may kill me. My life is at stake here. But I need to do it.

I need to go there. God does want me to reconcile with him, and part of my relationship with him is that I will go and I will heal or at least address this breach. Because it was important to Jacob to have a good relationship with God. He wanted to finish or go through that process of reconciliation. And so in verse 9, Jacob prays to God, one thing that we can do about, well, we're feared for anything, or we're in the process of this, and we don't know how things are going to turn out. We turn to God. We put it in his hands. Jacob prays a very sincere prayer, O God of my father Abraham, God of my father Isaac, the eternal who said to me, return to your country and to your family, and I will deal well with you.

It's Matthew 5.24, isn't it? Jacob, I've blessed you. Jacob, I've seen how you've grown. I've seen how you've developed. You become a man after God that even the people describe. The God of the old Testament, they will say the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. He saw how well he had developed, but there was one thing yet he had to do. He had to go back, and he had to make amends, or at least the process of reconciliation with his brother. Remember or return to your country and your family, and I'll deal well with you. You have to do this, Jacob.

He goes on, I'm not worthy, Jacob, praying, I am not worthy of the least of all the mercies, and of all the truth which you have shown your servant. For I crossed over this Jordan with my staff, and now I've become two companies. Deliver thee, I pray, from the hands of my brother, from the hands of Esau. For I fear him, lest he come and attack me and the mother with the children. For you said, I will surely treat you well, and make your descendants as the sand of a sea, which cannot be numbered for multitude. He reminds God of the promises he made him.

God is also building that faith up in him, Jacob. I'm with you. Jacob, do this. Jacob, you must do it.

Leave your gift at the altar. Go and be reconciled to your brother, and then come and worship me, and I will deal well with you. And Jacob gained faith in that, Jacob gained strength in that, and Jacob was purpose to follow it through.

In the verse of chapter 32, it's the occasion where the angel came and wrestled with Jacob all night long. And Jacob wouldn't let it go, and even when he put his shoulder out of socket, through all the pain he kept wrestling, because he wasn't going to let God go. Nothing was going to separate him from God. No pain. Nothing was going to separate him. God had blessed him. God had given him sons. God had given him the wife he wanted. God had given him wealth. And there wasn't anything that he was going to allow to take away that relationship with God. Even going to see his brother, even wrestling in pain with the angel. Now, I'm going to... You can mark down in your notes Matthew 16, verse 26. Or it says, What is the profit of man if he gains the whole world but loses his soul? And that was the situation that Jacob was in. I've got all this wealth. I've got everything I've wanted and more than I ever expected, but I know I need to do this. And if I don't do it, then my relationship with God is over and I haven't done what he wanted me to do. So, Jacob's move forward. Let's go down to chapter 33.

After he wrestled with him, after he's prepared his gift, after he's purposed to go through with this and nothing was going to stand between him and God, even the prospect of death at the hands of Esau and knowing and misinterpreting what those 400 people with Esau were about to do. In chapter 33, verse 1, it says, Jacob lifted his eyes and looked and there. Esau was coming, and with him were those 400 men. And so he divided the children among Leah, Rachel, and the two maidservants. He looked at it, and you know what? His heart had to be racing. He looked at that and he thought, wow, now's the moment of truth, right? I'm going to get what I deserved.

I'm going to reap what I sowed. And at that moment in life, Jacob knew what humility meant.

All the pride that he might have had was disappeared. He was looking at Esau, and he knew that he was facing something that he hadn't seen before, sometimes admitting that we're wrong, sometimes burying the hatchet with someone, sometimes swallowing your pride can be a very difficult thing to do. But we all have to do it. We all have to do it. And when God directs us in that regard, we do it in the name of reconciliation and in the name of building and rebuilding relationships with each other and with him. So down in verse 4, let's look at verse 3. Esau crossed over before them, and he bowed himself to the ground seven times until he came near to his brother. This is a very different Jacob than Esau knew before, right? Here's a man coming to him who has taken everything from him, who has all this wealth, who sent this message on, who said, I want to meet you. And Jacob takes the position of humility. I'll bow before you, Esau. When we approach someone for reconciliation, we never do it out of a sense of pride. We also, we always do it out of a sense of humility, understanding, understanding what we have done and the hurt that we have caused. So in verse 4, something unexpected happens to Jacob. Esau ran to meet him and embraced him, and fell on his neck and kissed him, and they wept. Ah, when there is godly reconciliation, joy results. When relationships are rebuilt, when relationships are restored, there is joy. Just like the joy in heaven, just like the joy God wants you and I to understand, just like the joy we feel when husband and wife resolve their differences and they are back together. When friend and friend are able to resolve the differences, admit what they've done wrong, and they're back together, the joy is indescribable. You can't put a dollar amount on it. The joy that was there. The, the relief that Jacob felt, the joy that he felt, and God had answered his prayer. And Esau had, God had blessed him as well, so he was doing very well. And he wasn't interested in killing Jacob. He was interested in the reconciliation as well.

And God saw that happen. And when we do things God's way, when we do things the way God wants us to, it often works out well because his will is that relationships are restored and that relationships are healed. And that, just like God does, they forget the past and they get on with the future.

And they build a relationship on God's principles from that time forward, because we all make mistakes.

A lot of times we have to own up to those mistakes, not just to God, but to each other, that the relationship with God can be either even further cemented.

Now later here on in the chapter, as they talk and as they're exchanging, exchanging the pleasantries and information about each other, verse 10, Jacob came prepared to give us his substance to restore that relationship. Jacob said, No, Esau, if I found favor in your sight, please receive my present from my hand, inasmuch as I have seen your face, as though I had seen the face of God, and you were pleased with me. This is what God wanted to happen. No amount of money, no amount of pride, no amount of whatever it is that's between us, was worth, could pay for the joy that was here. Please take my blessing that is brought to you because God has dealt graciously with me and because I have enough.

So, Jacob urged him and he took it. The reconciliation was complete. He accepted what Jacob had done. He accepted it. And God was pleased with what had gone on there. Just as he is pleased when we use the principles of relationships that are in the Bible, attend commandments certainly, obeying those in spirit and in letter, and when there are differences because differences will arise between people. Now, we bury the hatchet, that we seek the reconciliation, that we do the things whether we're the ones who offended, who has a responsibility as well, can't sit back and say, well, you know what, they can come to me. Now, we have a responsibility to heal that relationship as well. Or the one who was offended to come and say, you know what, you hurt me in this way. God wants a relationship with everyone. He wants that relationship with him and we know the principles we need to live by. And this is one of them we need to live by. He wants a relationship among the people in the church.

He wants a relationship between husbands and wives, family members, church members, because we are all family members, by the Spirit. So, we need to be aware of that and do what we need to do, that our relationship with God can grow. Let's conclude in Isaiah, Isaiah 58. Isaiah 58. This is the fasting chapter. We sometimes call it, God talks about the fast that he wants. Later on in the chapter, he talks about how to keep the Sabbath day, very important to God, what we do on that. But in verse 11, after he talks about the fast that he would show, then he says this and he specifically, I guess as we look at it today, would be talking to us as first fruits. As we get to the day of Pentecost, we'll talk about the first fruits.

God's calling to us. Verse 11 says, The Eternal will guide you continually when you do these things. Lord will guide you continually and satisfy your soul and drought and strengthen your bones. You will be like a watered garden and like a spring of water whose waters do not fail.

Those from among you, those from among you shall build the own waste places.

Speaking of the time to come when Jesus Christ returns to the world, the world in the age ahead, those from among you shall build the old waste places. You will raise up the foundations of many generations and you will be called the repairer of the breach, the restorer of streets to dwell in, the repairer of the breach. Certainly there's a physical implication of those verses, but there's a spiritual implication of those verses as well. Repair of the breach. We can be people who are about repairing the breaches, repairing our relationships and cementing those relationships as we grow in love and commitment to each other in this life. Remember that God is God of relationships and He's given us the principles to live by. May we all, may we all live by those principles.