Respecting Our Mothers

Thank you very much, David. A very beautiful song.

I don't know if you've noticed the new flowers we have gracing the podium and the stage today. Again, I'd like to thank Sheri for all of her work and doing these. They certainly do add to the beauty up here. Al and I take away from it, but these add. Brethren, you and I live in an age when parents, fathers, and mothers are not respected the way they should be. So often we find parents, children, are at odds with one another. We have a scripture in the Bible in 2 Timothy 3, verses 1 through 5 that describes some of the conditions, situations that we see occurring here at the end time.

2 Timothy 3, beginning in verse 1, says, But know this, that in the last days perilous times will come, for men will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boasters, proud blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful. And that could tie in with parents. You can take on thankfulness in many different directions. But many times young people are not thankful for the fact that they have parents, that they have someone who provides food, clothing, shelter for them, unholy, unloving, unforgiving, slanderers without self-control, brutal, and so on.

Now the reason why I mention this is tomorrow is Mother's Day. It's a day that we set aside to pay respect to our mothers, really to all moms, but sad to say this is one day that some people, or is the only day that some people pay any type of respect to their mothers. The rest of the year moms are just sort of forgotten, and on this one day sometimes they show respect. I think as one shrewd commentator advised husbands when it comes to Mother's Day, do not buy her anything that plugs in.

If something needs to plug in, she will see it only as a tool. Do not get her any exercise equipment, as this will lead to six months of her asking you why you think she needs to exercise in the first place.

I'll guarantee you that this is something you do not want to live with. So there are some general guidelines on buying presents for your wife, if you're going to do that. Let me relate to you a story that illustrates the lack of respect that we see in society. I may have mentioned this to you before, but I think it shows the way so many people tend to look at the job of a mother and motherhood. This title, The Greatest Occupation, says, A few months ago I was picking up my children at school, and another mother I knew rushed up to me.

Emily was fuming with indignation. Do you know what you and I are? She demanded. Before I could answer, as I really didn't have one handy, she blurted out the reason for her question. The same she had just returned from renewing her driver's license at the county clerk's office. Asked by the woman recorded to state her occupation, Emily had hesitated, uncertain how to classify herself. What I mean is, explain the recorder, do you have a job?

Or are you just a ... and you can fill in the blank. Of course I have a job, snapped Emily. I'm a mother. Well, we don't list mothers as occupations. Housewife covers it, said the recorder, emphatically. I forgot all about the story into one day I found myself in the same situation, this time at our own town hall. The clerk was obviously a career woman, poised, efficient, and possessed of a high-sounding title, such as High Interrogator or Town Registrar. What your occupation, she probed. What made me say it, I do not know, she says, but the word simply popped out.

I'm a research associate in the field of child development and human relations. The clerk paused with her ballpoint, frozen in midair, looked at me as though she had not heard right, and I repeated the title slowly, emphasizing the most significant words. Then I stared with wonder as my pompous pronouncement was written in bold black ink in the official questionnaire. Might I ask, said the clerk with renewed interest, just what you do in your field? Coolly without a trace of fluster in my voice, I heard myself reply.

I have a continuing program of research, says what mother doesn't. In the laboratory and in the field. Normally I would have said indoor and outdoors. I'm working for my master's, the whole family, and already have four credits. Parentheses, all daughters. Of course, a job is one of the most demanding in humanities. And said, who would disagree with that? And I often work 14 hours a day. And she said, how about 24? But the job is more challenging than the run-of-the-mill career, and the rewards are in satisfaction rather than just money.

There was an increased note of respect in the clerk's voice as she completed the form, stood up, and personally ushered me to the door. As I drove into the driveway, buoyed by my glamorous new career, I was greeted by my lab assistants, aged 13, 7, and 3. Upstairs, I could hear our new experimental model. Six months in the child development program, testing out a new vocal pattern. I felt triumphed. I had scored a beat on bureaucracy.

And I had gone on the official record as someone that distinguished herself and indispensable to mankind rather than just another mother. Well, this is the way a lot of people look at motherhood. Well, you're just a mother. You're just a housekeeper. And I have this high-flute job. I'm a career person. Let's take a look today at what God says about motherhood. And the respect that you and I are to pay our parents, especially our mothers. The reason why I am focusing on moms is that's the time of the year.

This is the time when we do focus on our mothers. Let's go back to Exodus 20. Exodus 20, beginning in verse 1. Let's take a look at the Ten Commandments here very quickly. Exodus 20, verse 1. God spoke all these words, saying, I am the Lord your God who brought you up out of the land of Egypt, out of the house of bondage.

You shall have no other gods before me. So God begins to list ten vital principles, spiritual principles, fundamental principles that are to guide mankind in his relationship, first of all with God, and secondarily among himself. You know, how we deal with other people. Then it goes on to say, verse 4, you are not to make for yourself a carved image or any likeness. You are not to bow down before them or serve them. So you and I are not to make any type of graven image. And then verse 7, you shall not take the name of the Lord your God in vain, for the Lord will not hold him guiltless, who has taken his name in vain.

So we're not to take God's name in vain. We are to honor God's name, respect God's name. Then, verse 8, remember the Sabbath day to keep it holy. So then we're commanded to keep the Sabbath. Now, the first four of these commandments show us how to worship God. Sometimes people in the world wonder about the Sabbath, but the Sabbath is a test commandment.

It's one commandment that shows you're willing to put God first. Now, in verse 12, when we get into the commandments dealing with relationships, let's notice the fifth commandment is the first one to deal with family and relationships among people. What does it say? Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long upon the land which the Lord your God is giving you.

Then it says you're not to murder, you're not to commit adultery, steal, bear false witness, or to covet. What you find is the family is the basis of society. And God demonstrates this, I think, in the order that the commandments were given. He starts out by emphasizing that you and I have a responsibility to honor our parents, and if they're not alive, to honor their memory.

I think you'll find that the family is at the very heart of the plan for mankind. That God is creating a family. You and I are called his sons and daughters. He's our father. Christ is our elder brother. And you'll find that this is a commandment that shows, and if it's applied, will do so much to strengthen a country, a nation, a society, a people.

If the family unit and the respect for that family unit is obeyed, those relationships are the keynote of our society and our spiritual well-being. The fifth commandment calls for all children of all ages to honor their parents. Now, why? Why does God want us to honor our parents? What are the reasons for honoring our father and our mother? Well, you could simply say that your mom deserves to receive honor, and she deserves it for many different reasons. She deserves it because God says so. That's an easy answer. God tells us to do it. But the words are very simple. Honor your father and your mother. The key word is honor.

In the Hebrew, the word for honor means heavy, if you've ever looked the word up. But it means heavy. The basic sense is to treat someone with respect because they carry a heavy weight of authority, a heavy responsibility. And when you look at the duties that God puts on a father and a mother, and where God commands them to rear godly children, there is a heavy responsibility.

Sometimes we call certain dignitaries heavyweights. You know, that they are somebody who carries a lot of clout or a lot of authority. To honor means to treat with dignity, respect, and deference. And in this case, somebody who should have our respect for the authority that they have.

Sometimes you find moms don't get the honor and the respect that they should have and that they deserve. Their responsibilities, their duties, many times are underappreciated. So, in this country, at least, we have one day a year to honor your parents. But we should honor our parents 365 days a year. Ask yourself the question, is this a commandment that you only have to keep one day out of the year? Or is it a commandment you should keep every day? Well, obviously, you should observe it and keep it every day. You can't pick and choose when you're going to keep it.

It's a day that we honor our moms for her hard work, her unconditional love, her sacrifice, and her undying devotion that she's had to the family and to the children in rearing those children. Let me give you an example of the type of love that mothers have. This is a true story during World War II. Solomon Rosenberg and his family were sent to a concentration camp. There, several members of the family, including a very frail, insectally son named David, were sent.

The rules were simple. You live as long as you're strong enough to do the work. You're not able to do the work. You go to the gas chamber. Each day after work, the family would come back to the barracks and hug each other. Once, one day, they all came back and Solomon could not find his son David or his wife. A friend said that the soldiers came to take young David to the furnaces. He cried out for his mother and said he was scared. The mother could not let her son go alone to that horrible fate.

So the friend said she stood up and smiled and said, Well, let me go with you so you won't be afraid. That shows you the love. I don't think that just this mother had, but all mothers would be willing. They'd be willing to die with or for their children.

It's a true story. It shows the love of a mother. It also demonstrates godly love. I think when God comes to putting his attributes within men and women, that the ability to love, the ability to show that love, the emotions to be able to feel love, that God gave those to a woman, perhaps to a greater degree. God has sort of equally distributed, I think, his attributes among us.

So what you find is that mothers truly do love their children. Now, we know that we live in an age and a time when some people don't have natural affections, but those are the exceptions. Let's go over to Proverbs chapter 1 and verse 8. Book of Proverbs chapter 1.

And we find here a very important principle in something that all of us need to remember. It says, What you find, mothers as well as fathers, but especially mothers, are the teachers of the future generation. Generally, moms have more of an opportunity, more time to spend with the children, especially if mom is able to stay home, and to be able to teach that child. And it's not just a matter of, well, quote-unquote, I can just spend some quality time. It's a matter that you're there throughout the whole day. Something comes up. There are just dozens and hundreds of opportunities to comment on how something should be done, how something should be approached as far as life is concerned. Mothers are preparing more than just the next generation. If we teach our children properly, they will pass it on to their children and to their grandchildren. So your influence can have an impact on many generations to come. And that's the way God intended. Let's notice chapter 6. Chapter 6 and verse 20.

It says, My son, keep your father's commandment, and do not forsake the law of your mother. Now, why? Bind them continually upon your heart. Tie them around your neck. In other words, remember the instructions. You'll bind them on your heart. Put them in here. Tie them around your neck. When you roam, they will lead you.

When you sleep, they will keep you. When you awake, they will speak to you. For the commandment is a lamp, the law is a light, and the reproofs of instruction are a way of life. So you can apply that principle to parents, instructing, guiding, leading their children. Destructions from parents are given to help protect you, to help you to avoid pitfalls and problems. Helping we as parents, say to ourselves, are among each other when it comes to training our children, teaching our children. That we don't want them to make the same mistakes we did. That we want to help them over some of the hurdles.

Children come back and say, well, look at all the things you did in the past. I want to find out for myself. So you have this battle going on many times between the generations. If your mom or your mother says, well, she doesn't want you to make a big fuss over her on Mother's Day. I don't know how many of you have ever heard your mom say that, but sometimes they'll say that. She's not being totally honest with you. Not being totally truthful about that.

Even if she meant it, she still wants you to make a fuss. She'd still like for you to give the honor and the respect. What you find that when we tell our moms and we express it to them, that we are expressing out of our hearts, we should be expressing out of our hearts, our deep feelings and convictions that we have for them. Even if we're an adult, and many of us are in the situation where our moms are not living, we can still honor their memory.

We can think about them. And I think this is a time that we do that. You know, sometimes people say, well, your mom knows that you love her. Sort of like a husband says, well, you know, I told her when we got married that I love her. She knows that I love her. I don't care if you've told your mom 100,000 times you love her.

She never tires of knowing that you love her, that you appreciate her. There isn't a mother alive who doesn't appreciate their children telling her that. Of course, the honor that we give to our mothers should be more than once a year. It should be more than our once a year trek to a Hallmark, buy a card, and then a quick trip to Walmart or somewhere to get some flowers.

And you have to give to your wife. The woman who was responsible, if you might remember, for launching our Mother's Day tradition is an American woman. An American's Mother's Day is a result of the efforts of one woman. Her name was Anne Marie—I think it's Marie—Ammam Jarvis. She first suggested the national observance of an annual day honoring all mothers because she had loved her mother so dearly. At the memorial service for her mother on May 10, 1908, Ms. Jarvis gave a carnation, her mother's favorite flower, to every person who attended.

Now, where did she get the idea? Well, the idea of her Mother's Day was born in a little Methodist church in Grafton, West Virginia. Most of you won't know where Grafton, West Virginia is, but we used to pastor that area. It was 1876, and this nation was still mourning the Civil War dead. While teaching a Memorial Day lesson, Mrs. Anna Reeves Jarvis thought of mothers who had lost their sons. She prayed that one day there would be a Memorial Day for mothers.

The prayer made a deep impression on one of Mrs. Jarvis' eleven children. So she had eleven children. Young Anna had seen her mother's effort to hold the war-split community and church together. As she grew into adulthood, the younger woman kept Mrs.

Jarvis' dream in her heart. On the day after her mother's death, Anna was determined to establish Mother's Day in her honor. On May 12, 1907, a local observance was held, which was later spread to Philadelphia. By 1910, Mother's Day was celebrated in 45 states, Puerto Rico, Hawaii, Canada, and Mexico. The late Mrs. Jarvis told a friend, where it will end must be left for the future to tell, that it will circle the globe now seems certain.

Finally, following a letter writing campaign, Jarvis convinced Congress and President Woodrow Wilson to proclaim the second Sunday of May in 1914 as National Mother's Day. On May 8, 1914, President Wilson designated the day, and he wrote, Mother's Day is for displaying the American flag and for the public expression of love and reverence for the mothers of the country. The idea took off. The day became a commercial success, almost immediately, that Jarvis soon regretted her efforts. She was sorry that she ever recommended it, because instead of it just being a day to honor mothers, it became a commercial enterprise, and she went to her grave sad, that the day that she had thought was going to be just a day memorial to mothers became such a commercial endeavor.

And sad to say, like so many things in our Western society, commerce wins out, and you find that certainly today. In Colossians 3.20, we read this, Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord. So we find that children are to obey their parents. What you find, family matters to God. It's the basis of society, and it should be extremely important to our children.

Good, strong families, as I mentioned, provides a foundation for the children. When children grow up honoring their parents, they grow up with proper values, and then they are able to pass those values on to their own children. Let's notice in Deuteronomy 5.16. Deuteronomy 5.16, this is where the Ten Commandments are reiterated in the book of Deuteronomy. You find the promise that God gives here goes in a slightly different direction. Deuteronomy 5.16, Honor your father and your mother, as the Lord your God has commanded you, that your days may be long. That's what we found back in Exodus 20. And that it may be well with you in the land which the Lord your God is giving you.

So you'll find there is a dual promise here. In the New Testament, you find that this is the first commandment with promise. The promise is not only a long life, but a successful life as well, for honoring and respecting and obeying your parents. So we find that it's absolutely important that our young people grow up with the attitude of honoring parents. Every teacher will tell you that schools aren't really the key to learning. The key to learning is the family.

Who are the first teachers? What's the parents? And especially, mom. God sent her family where parents pour their spiritual values and their faiths into the lives of their children, where kids honor their parents, produces a spiritual legacy that nothing can destroy. And it's the parents who encourage children, help children, as far as their education is concerned, and also their spiritual education. Remember Timothy, back here in 2 Timothy, chapter 1, and verse 5, Notice Paul's comment about Timothy.

It says, When I call to remembrance the genuine faith that is in you. So Timothy was a man who had faith. But where did he get that? Which dwelt first in your grandmother, Loyce, and your mother, Eunice.

And I am persuaded is in you also. So you find that a mother, a grandmother, who teaches the right way, who lives by God's law, who sets an example of living faith in their lives, living by God's word, that that mother can have a tremendous influence upon her children. And here you find, see it wasn't Timothy's dad, if you want to compare it this way. Timothy's dad was unconverted. He was a Greek. Here you find that his mother, though, was a Hebrew. And she knew God's way and taught her son. So this would be today like having an unconverted, you know, one of the mates in the family being unconverted.

Many of you may have seen this. There was a, oh, this was put out. I've seen it for years. What I owe my mother, what my mother has taught me, how my mother has taught me, you know, different things. It's sort of funny in one sense, but I think it illustrates the point. It says, my mother taught me to appreciate a job well done. She said, if you're going to kill each other, do it outside.

I just finished cleaning. My mother taught me religion. You better pray that that comes out of the carpet. My mother taught me time travel. If you don't straighten up, I will knock you into the middle of next week. My mother taught me lodging because I said so. That's why. My mother taught me more lodging. If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the sore with me. My mother taught me foresight. Make sure you wear clean underwear in case you're in an accident.

I did have my mother tell me that. And since I was always in accidents, I needed the admonition. My mother taught me about the science of osmosis. Shut your mouth and eat your supper. My mother taught me about stamina. You sit there until all the spinach is gone. My mother taught me about the weather. Your room looks like a tornado just went through it. My mother taught me about the circle of life. I brought you into the world. I can take you out of the world. My mother taught me about behavior modification.

Stop acting like your father. My mother taught me about anticipation. Just wait until we get home. No, I've heard that one. My mother taught me about receiving. You're going to get it when you get home. My mother taught me about medical science. If you don't start crossing your eyes, they're going to get stuck that way. My mother taught me ESP.

You put that sweater on, don't you think? I know when you're cold. Now, we always had a joke about that in our family. About putting your sweater on, and our kids would say, that's because mom's cold.

My mom taught me about humor. When the lawnmower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me.

My mother taught me about becoming an adult. If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up.

My mother taught me about genetics. You're just like your father. My mother taught me about my roots. Shut the door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?

And then finally, my mother taught me about justice. One day you will have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you. All of those are a little funny, but all of those also illustrate what mothers have to teach. Justice, wisdom, roots, where did you come from, family, what it means to become an adult, how to have proper humor. You can go on and on again. Our parents are our first teachers. The whole foundation of our lives is passed on to us by our parents. Where do you get the foundation? Depending on what that foundation is like depends to a great extent how we turn out. But yet, I think we all have to admit that Mother's Day is not always a pleasant experience for everybody. And that's because of a number of reasons. For those who have recently lost a mother, this can be one of those days that you relive everything that you've just gone through. And you can experience the grief all over. And yet, the Bible says back in 2 Corinthians 1 that God is the God of all comfort. And we know that our parents will live one day. I remember very vividly when my mother died. She had had a stroke. I was up in Cincinnati teaching one of the classes that occurred right after ABC. My wife and I went down to Somerset, Kentucky to be there with her. We were there for several days. And it looked like she was getting better. So we came back. Next day she died. And you always remember those things. And my mother was one that many of you knew. And she was an outstanding mom. She certainly loved us, but she didn't take anything off of us. Growing up, we grew up on a farm. Everybody had to do his part. But God is the one who gives us comfort and encouragement. Sometimes Mother's Day, for women who have never had children, can often feel left out on a day like this. And they think, well, they're honoring mothers. I may never be a mother or I don't have children. And many times there are a lot of reasons why a woman might not have children. Sometimes by choice, sometimes not by choice. I've known some women. My wife and I have talked that we'd make wonderful mothers and they're just not able to have children.

Now you can look at that two ways. You can say, if you've never had children, we won't go there. But if you've never had children, you, I think in most cases, have helped others who have had children. When we look at the congregation this size, or over the years, the congregation, many of our young people, you'll find that we had many people in the local congregation who volunteered to help the youth. Teach classes, help to go to what we used to have YOU events or youth events to assist in many different ways. And so we find that even though many may not have had children, or some may not have had children, that almost all have, in one way or another, helped set an example and been able to serve. Now the Bible says, to honor your father and your mother. Now some people might say, well, my mother didn't deserve honor. She was the meanest person on the face of the earth. Or she mistreated me. And it is hard when you look at a family where maybe the father was abusive in different ways, or where the mother was to honor. But the commandment does not say anything about your mother or your father's qualifications. It says to honor them. You don't honor the abuse. You don't honor the things that are wrong. But you do honor the memory they gave you life. You wouldn't be here. You wouldn't have a chance at salvation of living eternally. You weren't for your parents. So what you find, we are to pay honor and respect. There's got to be something that you can think of that you would pay respect and honor for that parent. Matthew 15, Christ emphasized this because in his day there were those who knew better, and they were not paying the proper respect to their mothers, their parents. Let's notice Matthew 15, verse 4. God commanded saying, Honor your father and your mother. And he who curses father or mother, let him be put to death. But you say, Whoever says to his father or mother, whatever prophet you might have received from me is a gift from God, or a gift to God. Or Corbin, I think, as the King James version says.

What they were doing, instead of taking care of the needs of their parents, they were saying, Well, we're going to give what we could have given to take care of our parents to show honor and respect for them. We're going to give it to God. And so they were going around tooting their horns about how much they'd given to God. They'd given this special offering. I'm not talking about tithes here, but over and above that, some type of a special offering. And then they were neglecting their parents. Notice, he goes on to say, Then he need not honor his father or mother. Thus have you made the commandment of God of no effect by your tradition. Hypocrites, well did Isaiah prophesy about you saying, These people draw near to me with their mouth, they honor me with their lips, but their heart is far from me. And in vain they worship me teaching for doctrine the commandments of men. What commandment is he specifically referring to? Honoring your father and your mother. And so what we need to do, notice, is that God does say to honor, and that you and I are to pay that respect to our parents. Isn't it amazing how our perspective about our parents changes over the years?

We can start out with a certain approach, and gradually that will change, and as we come to an older age, we tend to come back to where we started. You may have seen this before, the image of a mother at various stages of a child's life. Four years of age, my mother can do anything. Eight years of age, my mother knows a lot, a whole lot. Twelve years of age, my mother doesn't really know quite everything. Fourteen years of age, naturally mom doesn't know that either. Sixteen, mother, she's hopelessly lost.

Hopelessly old-fashioned. Eighteen years of age, that old woman, she's way out of date. Twenty-five years of age, well, she might know a little bit about it. Thirty-five, before we decide, let's get mom's opinion. Forty-five, wonder what mom would have thought about it. Sixty-five years of age, I wish I could talk it over with mom once again. How often have I heard my wife say that? I wish I had my mom to talk to. Well, that's something that I think we all realize. If you still have your mothers, spend time with her. Talk to her. Honor her. Because there will come a day when she will not be there. We find that God made us male and female. I think He's given to women unique characteristics to carry out the responsibility of being a wife and a mother. When I look at all of the things that my wife has done over the years, and all the wives and mothers do, and rearing children, I just shake my head and say, I'm glad that I'm not a mother, because I don't think I could have done those things. Women have the capacity to nurture, to give unconditional love, to be gentle, to be patient, to serve. They just have qualities. Not that we men can't be nurturing to a certain extent, but women just have the knack for this. I think God is given to each one of the sexes different characteristics to enable each to carry out His responsibilities. Obviously, there's overlapping, but we're different. I want you to notice this poem, which I think sort of summarizes the truth about the matter. It's titled, What Rules the World? They say that man is mighty, he governs land and sea, he wields a mighty scepter over lesser powers than he. But, moneyer power and stronger, man from his throne has hurled, for the hand that rocks the cradle is the hand that rules the world. So the hand that rocks the cradle, the hand that influences the next generation, is the one that rules the world, is going to have the most influence. So God wants us to honor our parents every day. So I said the fifth commandment is not a commandment we just observe once a year, but is the basis of our relationships in family and in society. So, brethren, as we come to Mother's Day, Father's Day, and Parents' Day throughout the rest of the year, let's make sure that we honor our Father and our mothers.