Unparalleled Relationships, Part 1

Society is digging deeper and deeper for new lows in human relationships. Now, it's easy for you or me to appoint a society and say, you guys don't know what you're doing, which is true. But what would be more of a reality is to put ourselves with society if we weren't in this church and to say, we as a human race don't know how to walk. We don't know how to plot our path. And the evidence of that is everywhere within the human society without God.

If you look in the news today, you will see civil war among brothers in Syria. You will see fighting and factions throughout the world of those who consider themselves to be enlightened, have a greater religion, a better knowledge, a better idea of how to live. And yet they've torn their world apart. They've torn relationships apart between themselves, between families. They live in a way that humiliates part of their own human family within their homes. And they have, it seems, very little respect or admiration for others as they injure them and hurt them.

Now, multiply that on a scale in any civilization around the world, and you'll find that within almost any country, that applies to little children and girls and boys and women and even men. In a massive slave trade, there are more slaves on earth today by far than at any time in history. We have become masters at ripping apart relationships between man and man and man and animals and man and the environment and man and God. On all levels, humanity is digging for new loaves.

Go back to when I was a kid, if you want to take a little trip back, and laugh a little bit. The TV show that was, I don't know, the biggest event in our family, was called Leave It to Beaver. Leave It to Beaver was kind of folksy and fun, and they played the little music, and the little boy walked down the sidewalk, and he got home, and there he had a nuclear family.

He had a mother who was dressed modestly, spoke nicely, had an older brother, who was kind of dorky, and they'd treat each other like brothers do, and he had an odd friend that came around, you know, that was typical. And then they had a father who would show up after work.

And the father was thoughtful, but he was authoritative, and everybody in the family knew their role, and some lesson of the day was learned, and then the music would start up again, and dorky, dorky, dorky, dork. That was the end of the show, and the credits ran. Now, I liked that show. I thought that was fun. That show kind of mirrored our family at home. It wasn't too long after that that society began to point fun at that particular show, and even today you'll hear it just being laughed at with derision of what an absurd portrayal of a family, the Cleaver family, was on that television show.

Within probably five to seven years, you had shows of broken families, or families with no parent whatsoever. A father with three sons, families patching together multiple marriages, or this, that, the other thing. You had teens raising children, teens almost with teens. Then the shows ran to where there were no family relationships, plus people swapping people and swapping around and doing crazy things, and more laughter back at the nuclear family. Today, we look at our world and we see the response of families that disintegrate, and we see that children who get wounded and hurt often are attracted to people of their same sex and want to get into relationships that avoid nuclear family type structure.

This last week, not that this is any example or any big example, it's just an example. This last week, I was given a ride from one location to another by an individual who services vehicles, on the way he said, I want to see a picture of my family. I said, sure. So he pulled out his picture, it was on the dashboard of his truck, he pulled it out of the frame, and he just admired that, and he showed it to me.

He says, oh, you've got three kids. Well, they're not my kids, they're step-kids that I have now. I've never been married until three years ago. I always just ran around, but this woman came in my life, and she had kids. I don't know if they were her kids, actually, but she had kids. And so now, I have a family, and I have a reason to go to work, and I don't get drunk anymore and not show up. And he puts it back on his desk, and he says, this is giving me a reason to be responsible.

And I said, wow, that's good. And talked a little about relationships, gave him a tip or two. And that 12-year-old, 13-year-old girl, she actually is talking to me. So we talked a little bit, and he didn't want to leave when he dropped me off. He just felt that there was some connection there, and he's off with this relationship. Well, that's great. But there's a different sort of beginning and end and in between.

I took my wife to dinner this week, and the person serving us said, yeah, I'm working real hard, I'm trying to get into management. Oh, why is that? Well, I have a son to support now. The son's mother gave him up. He's three years old. She didn't want him, so he's living with me. And I've also got that woman's sister's 13-year-old son now has moved in with us. And so, kind of, I've got a babysitter while I'm at work, but I've got to get up in management so I can pay the bills and take care of my new family.

I thought, wow, this is different. There's some built-in challenges there. Three-year-old growing up, 13-year-old, not even really related, but where does this go? This is normal. This is kind of our generation. It is headed in a direction that humanity thinks is normal, and the things that create those things can become normal. Today I'd like to ask you, what are the qualities of a high-quality relationship?

High-quality relationship, whether it's between family, husband and wife, mother and children, father and children, co-workers, neighbors, relatives, and with God. What are the key fundamental qualities of a relationship that is based on godliness? The God family strives for one thing in particular, one thing almost above all. Jesus talked about that in John 17.

He said, I desire that they be one as we are one. I and you, you and me, us and them, them and us, we want to be one. That's what the family of God does. It stitches together and becomes one. I told you many times that the word translated peace, Irene in the Greek, it's talking about togetherness. It's pulling something together.

So if you have agape love, joy is a byproduct of that and coming together. You can see this world is going apart. It's fracturing with people, environment, animals. Everything is breaking apart. Yet with God's family, it's growing together in unity by which each part does its share. So what are the principles of that in our relationships? I'd like to give some keys to a strong, vibrant relationship that transcends not only what society is currently doing, but what any human relationship can be.

I'd like to take a look at biblical keys to unparalleled relationships. And that's the title of the sermon, unparalleled relationships. I tried to choose a term that was unique, except unique isn't so unique anymore. Unique means unlike anything else, but we use it so often, it's lost its uniqueness. So if you said uncommon, well, that doesn't do it. It's hard to find a word. So working through the thesaurus, I came up with unparalleled. In other words, there's no parallel to it.

It's very different. What we're talking about today is unparalleled relationships that exist only in the Church of God, or with the family of God. Ultimate relationships you can have, they are really within the context of God's Church. Now, if you've ever wanted a reason to be in the Church of God, this would be it. Ultimate relationships. I'm telling you, and I will show you from the Scripture, you cannot have an ultimate relationship without truly being baptized, spirit-led, in the Church of God, or a God-being, which is what we hope to be. But without that link to the family of God, without that connection of the family of God, it's impossible, and we'll see this brought out very, very clearly.

You are either in or you're out with regards to ultimate relationships. And that's the key.

If you think about my conversion, lack of conversion, baptism, desire to be baptism, how well I am committing to the covenant that I made with Jesus Christ, it all has to do with your ability to either have or not have an ultimate relationship with others and with God. Let's take a look, first of all, at the Scripture I just mentioned, in Ephesians 4 and verse 15.

Ephesians 4 and verse 15. This relationship that the Church is to have begins, in verse 11, with He Himself, Jesus Christ.

And it ends up, in verse 15, that we, as the body of Christ, the members of the Church of God, Ephesians 4 and 15, breaking into the verse, may grow up in all things into Him who is the Head.

We are growing up into the family of God, into Him who is the Head, Christ, from whom, verse 16, the whole body joined and knit together by whatever joint supplies, according to the effective working by which every part does its share, causes growth of the body for the edifying of itself in agape.

Here's the problem. You have to have agape, and you have to have Jesus Christ bringing you into that relationship of the mindset of the God family in order to grow together, to have this growth of the body, this stitching together. So we're kind of book-end here. We have Jesus Christ sacrifice His calling and His working in us through the Spirit.

And on the other end, we have agape as the final product. The fruit of that Spirit in us is agape.

And in between are the relationships that we seek.

Husband, wife, parents, children.

We have our relationship with each other within the Church that are growing together tightly.

We have this growing up into Jesus Christ.

Remember the sermon I gave on putting on Christ, being clothed in Christ?

These ultimate, unparalleled relationships exist and can exist only within the context of the Church of God.

In contrast, the very poorest relationships that we humans can have are mentioned in the very next verse. Let's continue on in verse 17.

This I say therefore, and testify in the Lord that you should no longer... See, that's where we all were. I wasn't so bright as a kid. I just happened to be blessed to come into the Church, right?

If I weren't in the Church, I would be out there using the logic that following the course of this world.

I know where the wisdom comes that I have and live in my life, and I give God all the credit for it. I'm not that bright, believe me. But here we see, when we were out there, we no longer walk as the rest of the Gentiles or the non-Church members walk. In the futility of their mind, having their understanding darkened. See, it's not really their fault. Their understanding is darkened. They're blind. They can't see. We can't just look at them and say, ah ha ha ha ha, because it should be us.

Their understanding is darkened being alienated.

There it is. Alienated. It's going the other direction. Alienated from the life of God.

That's carnality. That's human. Put me first. I'm greedy. I'll act and live any way I want to. Which fractures relationships on every level. It's the antithesis of unparalleled relationships.

Whether with human, humans, or with God, selfishness, greediness, this carnality of the world just blows relationships away.

Self alienates friends. Try this sometime. No, don't. Selfishness will alienate friends. Two friends get together because they have, I don't know, something in common. Usually they want something from each other. The other person tends to give that. But they're there to feed off what the other person has, and it doesn't take too long.

Friends shift and shift and shift. Family members. The closest friends we have are family members. It's just part of selfishness and carnality that husbands and wives will be at issue. And as we saw in the scripture there, be alienated. There will be alienation. And the children with the parents will be alienated. And fathers tend to alienate children.

Alienation with God because of carnality. That is, enmity or hostility with God. The carnal mind is hostility with God, the Bible says. With co-workers. Even with church members. Whenever we get into that. Now, in contrast with what we're going to see in scripture, I thought it would be interesting, after I completed this sermon, to go look in society and find the top keys for great relationships. I mean, you would think that after 6,000 years, the human race would have figured out how to have great relationships, right? So we go to the top psychology publication, and we find an article called... Let me read it to you. Seven keys to healthy and happy relationships.

Seven. I mean, it's got to be good.

Okay, here's what they include. Point one. I'll respect you if you respect me.

Number two. Learn to argue properly. Number three. And number four. Compromise.

Compromise about intimate things, and compromise about how you raise your kids. Compromise will avoid warfare. So, compromise. In other words, whatever you stand for, don't stand for it. Compromise.

The fifth point is have an equal control of the money.

Number six. Have similar goals and values. If they're not, compromise again on your goals and your values. And number seven. Drumroll, please. Have fun.

Wow! Just shake your head.

Okay, well, let's see what the Bible says. All right. Unpearled relationships, as we've really already determined, all begin with agape.

They all begin with agape. You can call it compassion, concern. You can call it loving, caring, whatever. Agape is a selfless concern for someone else without thought for oneself. It's where relationships really begin. You know, Jesus, well, not Jesus, but John actually says in 1 John 4, verse 19, We love Him because He first loved us. See, relationships begin with somebody agape. He agape'd you and me. And then later on, we agape'd Him back. It's not a, hey, what have you got to give me? I'll check you out. Oh, yeah, you want that from me? Okay, we can come to some terms here. Okay, we're best friends. No, when we were still sinners offending God hostile, He died for our sins. He loved us. The Father loved us so much that He created this world before we even existed, and His Son was predestined, as it were, to die for us. He loved us. And that's how we come to know love. He loved us, and then we, in return, learn to love Him. Let me go back to the description of how this works. Within the church environment, God created the earth and the world and put humans here and blessed us with life and this great environment so that we, down here, would be able to live and recognize His creation and recognize Him. And in doing so, He, after we have repentance, would be able to give us forgiveness through the death of His Son, which now takes away the sin, and we can have a relationship with the Father and be given the direction through the Holy Spirit to do good works of loving, loving God with our heart, soul, and might, loving our neighbor as ourself. In doing that, when and if we obey Him, God considers us friends, and He loves us and gives us greater gifts, in order to serve, that back down at the top, then empower us to love God more, and to understand Him more, and to serve people more. It's all about the God family. And we go all the way forward to Revelation 22, and we find in the future, here's God the Father and Jesus Christ serving us on the throne with the waters pouring out and the leaves of the trees helping us, and we are serving them forever and ever and ever on a much higher plane.

The human visage of religion is, God did this for me so that I can have this.

God created so that I can have a nice life. God's Son died so that I can go to Heaven.

God did this so that I can have a career. God made this thing happen so that I can get the girl, or the car, the house, whatever it is. And it always ends with me, and it stops there. And, oh, praise the Lord. Next thing for me. That's selfishness. That's viewing everything with the great eye. Relationships that are unparalleled begin with giving all. God totally gives all to us. He expects us to totally give all back to Him, love with our heart, soul, and mind. Totally give.

We need to kick out our self-mindset. Part of this circle is the cleansing of the carnal and the bringing in of the mindset of God. It says in 1 Corinthians 12-25 that there should be no schism in the body, nothing offending, no breaking apart, or alienation within the body.

That the members should have the same care for one another. Same care for one another.

That's a wonderful thing. That's talking about a relationship. Paul talks about the body, human body, and the body of Christ being of many parts, many different things, but everything there, loving and honoring and stitching itself together.

I was listening to some music. I listened to it every Sabbath. And it just reminds me so much of this point.

Sometimes we don't understand the body connection, but maybe music, or even the keys on a piano or something, can be another type of an example.

In music, it's always the high notes that get the attention. It's always the sopranos and tenors that sing the main portion.

On the second basses, they might get a da-da-da-da kind of a low thing. You get some harmony. Within an orchestra, it's always the violins. They do the lead. You get some basses going, nah-nah-nah-nah-nah.

The piano, nah-nah-nah, is up there. The flutes are playing. That's really nice.

But there's a whole orchestra. There's 120 pieces up there. You've got the person with the flute and the violin. They're getting all the praise. Well, not so with the body of Christ. The lower members, he talks about, are getting raised, and the upper members are humbling themselves, and it all works together. So this point here about concern and compassion, he goes on to verse 26, If one member suffered, all the members suffer with it.

If one member is honored, all the members rejoice with it. Okay, going back to my piece of music I like.

It's typical within a well-done piece of music that the high notes carry the tune, and they get all the attention, right? So, and I like to get Sabbath music that's inspiring and instrumental and things, and stumbled into a musician named Brian Crane, C-R-A-I-N. And he is a pianist, right? He is a pianist. But there's some songs that he plays, notably Lavender Hills and Song for Sierra, and Midnight Blue, that he actually takes the piano notes in the middle range and the lower range, and the ones carrying the tune, and he brings them into a balance. He raises up the low notes, the ones that are just the common helper notes, and he diminishes the bright sparkly notes. He brings them down to where all the notes within the song get admiration. And it's interesting to see that happen, because when you go up and you're ready to hit the high notes, you're going to get the crescendo. I didn't even know you could hit a note that soft. And yet the middle notes, which he'd say, well, that's just background, he'll raise that up. And then in one of his songs, he's got a cello. A cello is kind of like first bass would be in a choir. Normally, cellos don't... you don't probably have any cello music at home, like cello solos.

So he's got this cello. Now, remember, Brian Crane is a pianist, right? He's the piano guy, and it's his song, and he's publishing it, but he invites a cellist to come in, and the cello is...

and for the song's finale, the pianist stops, and the finale is played by the cello. And I think, how phenomenal for the writer and the guy who's the star to step out of the scene and let the first bass section finish the piece and take all the glory. Now, you know, my brain thinks too much, but this is really how love is to work within the family of God.

You see, Jesus Christ, who is the shining star, he is the guy that should be on the center stage, diminishes himself and takes him down to where he can't even be found. He doesn't even look that great, right? And he serves, and he gives, and he helps you and me, and then he calls us friends. And then he tells us to call him, essentially, our elder brother, and he's the first of the first fruits, and he calls us first fruits in Revelation 14. You know, the family here kind of brings everybody in, and then when he returns, and he's the bright one, and he returns, he elevates the first fruits, and he gives them power over the nations as he has had power over the nations.

He gives them white horses. He gives them so many opportunities and sits us down and serves us. Wow! That is so inclusive. That's the way love in a family needs to be. Yes, there are roles and responsibilities. That's the way love within the Church of God needs to be. We don't need to be pushing anybody down or thinking of ministry or supreme or women or nothing or teens or nothing. We need to recognize that God does certain things within the group, just like the body has eyes and ears, but that all parts are important, and all parts should be encouraged to contribute to their maximum in stitching this body together.

For we all have equal opportunities. We are potential sons and daughters of God in the family of God. This is more than just, oh, I heard somebody was sick, I'm thinking of you, or I'm sorry to hear that kind of a thing, you see. Now, if one member suffers, all suffer. If one is honored, all the members rejoice with it. We have, it says in verse 25, the same care for one another. You can't just say we've got the right structure. Our Church has the right governance, the right structure.

It's the same mind of Christ that cares for one another. This is an unparalleled aspect of relationships that only can exist within the Church of God. It cannot exist outside because it requires agape. In 2 Corinthians chapter 8 and verse 2, we see an example that Paul gives us of this. 2 Corinthians chapter 8 and verse 2.

It is quite unique. Where you have church or churches in Macedonia, probably one of them, Philippi, which the book of Philippians was written to. 2 Corinthians chapter 8 and verse 4.

What the background is, a church somewhere, I don't recall whether it was Jerusalem or elsewhere, was going through a drought, a famine. They didn't have food. Now, that's one group of people. You might say those are Jews if it was Jerusalem. Over somewhere else, you have Gentiles, different tribe, different group in a little town never heard of, maybe.

And here's what Paul said. He showed up. And they were imploring us with much urgency that we should receive the gift, the gift of look like their grain, which they couldn't afford to give. They said, you've got to take this. And the fellowship and the ministering to the saints in need. And not only as we had hoped, but they first gave themselves to the Lord and then to us by the will of the Lord.

Now, in verse 3, he says, For I bear witness that according to their ability, and yes, beyond their ability, they were freely willing, beyond their ability. These are people in verse 2 that were in a great trial of affliction.

Sometimes we just think, oh yeah, there's one church, they're helping the other church. But you begin to back up here and you say, they were having a great trial of affliction, the abundance of their joy and their deep poverty abounded in the riches of their liberality. There's something else going on here that doesn't make sense within the carnal human mind.

And it's because of the Church of God, that people without in deep poverty and deep affliction are imploring Paul, take this, take some more! We're giving you more than what we can possibly afford. That's incredible. It really, really is.

Another important thing about these relationships is serving and doing good. It's the action part of agape. It's not just the feeling, but the serving, doing good. It says in Philippians 2, in verse 3, Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit. Within your relationships with God and man, within your family, work, the membership, let nothing be done through conceit. Well, you know, I feel I know I am. I'm smarter. I'm whatever. And so therefore, I'm the... When we have conceit like that, it blocks out God, blocks out inspiration. We need to have humility. Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit.

But in lowliness of mind, let each esteem others better than himself. You know, within a family, that's easy to do if your husband is to esteem your wife better than yourself, because frankly, she is. You know, she's smarter than we men are. She's multi-talented. She can have kids. None of us can have children. The whole world is populated by machines, human machines, that are much better than any machine we've ever made. We might make a ford, a fixer repair daily, or found on road dead.

They make humans! You know, last 80, 90 years, and get a million miles. Walk, they talk. They love, they can think. We're trying to still get a transistor to think. It's not working out so well. They are fantastic people. You look in Proverbs chapter 31, and you see an example of a godly person serving at all levels, selflessly, humbly, and also being praised for that. And that is what each of us should aspire to. That is way up there. A man would have a very tough time being a Proverbs 31 man. You want to go change all the he's, she's to he's, you know? I'm not saying in God's church, but I'm just saying typically, we would sort of burrow underneath some of those qualities.

Now, if we within a family relationship, a church family relationship, a God family relationship, place ourselves like Jesus Christ does, humbling ourselves and serving and loving, those relationships become something they can never, ever be without God's Holy Spirit, without a Gopé, without him involved.

In verse 4, let each of you look out not only for his own interest, but also for the interests of others. So we can begin to really see here that our church connection isn't just a religious event. It's not just, oh, I want to get in the kingdom or I want to go to the place of safety or I want to miss out on the tribulation, etc. It really is about ultimate relationships on several levels. We need to respect and think good of others along the way. We have no reason not to.

The individuals that I referenced that my wife and I bumped into or I rode in a vehicle this week, they should be respected for and encouraged in those difficult relationships in which they find themselves. And they should be respected for attempting to do things that are good and that are thoughtful of others. There's no reason not to respect everybody who is trying to live honorably. Even God says that He essentially respects us if we do those things which He commands, that the Father and He will draw close to us.

And that's a relationship builder. We need to be loving and obeying. In Philippians 4 and verse 8, it says, Brethren, whatever things are true... Now, true is right here. This is true. Truth. The Word, the Logos. There's the ultimate source of truth. And He's going to say, think on these things, meditate on these things. This is what really gives us the ability to have an ultimate relationship, is the understanding and the application of the mind of God. This is the written form of it. The Holy Spirit also works with that, helping us in bringing to remembrance the things that are in the Word of God.

Going on in Ephesians 4-8, whatever things are noble. There are many noble things. And if we respect, which we've talked about, if we respect and honor things that are good about other people, that builds relationships. Whatever things are lovely, are just. Whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report. If there's any virtue, if there's anything praiseworthy, meditate on these things. What we need to do is focus on the positive, no matter who the relationship is with.

We tend to have cast away, throw away relationships. So we don't like something about a person. If they bother us, if they bug us, boom, you're gone. Get rid of that. That's not what God does with you. You bother God. That's why he had his son come down and go through agony to die, so that that bothersome-ness can be removed.

We need to bear with one another. We need to be respectful. We need to think about the good things of others. I'll give you an example. I have some vehicles, thankfully. My vehicles, one of them is old. It's kind of falling apart. Things break all the time because we live in the sun out here, and it's 21 years old, going on 22.

It's never been in a garage in its life. It just sits out of the Arizona sun 365 days a year for almost 22 years, and that thing has problems. It has problems on the top.

It has problems on the side. It has problems on the bottom. It cost me $1,200 this week. It's going to cost me $700 next week. The repairman called and told me. This is the vehicle from, well, not where you want it to be from. This is a challenging vehicle. I have another vehicle. My other vehicle is 12 years old. It has not been in the sun that much. When we first got it, the transmission went out, and then the air conditioning went out.

That cost us $3,000. Since then, it's had some other issues, and carpets kind of falling apart on it. The grill sort of rotted out the front and was almost falling off. That's our other vehicle, and the tires started all going flat as we go down the freeway. Just because they were so old, it turned out.

They just... So that cost us a bunch of money to get tires put on it. The heaters never worked in it. But thankfully, we live here and only need that in the wintertime. We try not to use it if we need heat. So anyway, those are our vehicles. Now, people you know may be like those two vehicles. Going through life of those two vehicles, I guarantee, is not a lot of fun.

As described, they're not a lot of fun because... Well, you can see the problems with them. I didn't tell you that the first vehicle had many other failures inside, but I just talk about the outside and the mechanics of it. Now, if you applied that to your spouse for a minute, and you say, well, he just described my spouse. He just described my teenage kid. He just described my boss at work. He just described the only friend in the church I have, the only one that will be friends with me. It might actually be fitting.

I don't know. I don't know who your friends are, spouse, or family members are. Maybe all those are fine. Maybe it's your relative or neighbor. You've got a neighbor like that. But maybe you can think of someone like that. But you notice that I said I own those vehicles.

I didn't say I used to own them. They're currently owned vehicles. And there's a reason why they're currently owned vehicles. See, that's the glass half-empty side of those vehicles. There is a glass half-full side. Let me start over again. My wife and I own some vehicles. They are absolutely fantastic vehicles. And I'm almost embarrassed to tell you about them because they are so nice and you're going to feel jealous. This one is a Class A motorhome.

I mean, it is a motorhome that has a home on wheels. And it has everything you'd ever want inside. Three beds, a bathroom with a separate shower. I mean, this thing has four-burner stove, an oven, a microwave. It has a TV set. It's got stereo. And all of this available as you go down the road while you're getting to where you get. And if you're lucky like me, while you're driving, the wife says, oh, honey, would you like something to eat from the oven?

I'm like, yeah. That is nice. I tell you, we love our motorhome. It's very, very nice to have. And our second vehicle we have, if we can't use the motorhome because it's big and doesn't get very good gas mileage, we have a van. And the van is like a mini motorhome. It's sort of like the big one. It also has a kitchen and a sink and stove and fridge and a TV. It's got beds and everything else that you can imagine. And it pulls other things that we have that we like to enjoy and gets us around.

And it's quite nice to have. And having those two vehicles, you know, it's so unique that we in this life get to have those two unique vehicles. Now, they're both were described very, very accurately. Which would you like to have? Would you like to have the first set of vehicles or the second set of vehicles? That's a choice we have to make.

It is a choice we have to make. The point here isn't about a couple of dorky vehicles that I should have gotten rid of long ago, probably. But we just like them. We like them so much. If we ever get a minute to use them, it's like fun. We don't get to go anywhere in the motorhome, but we park it in Yuma, and that's our home when we go to the Yuma church. We stay in the motorhome. That's our home in Yuma.

And so we do get to use it. Driving it sometimes can be a problem. But that's where the money part comes in. If you have, for instance, a wife, not my wife, but if you had a wife, who has been married to you for 22 years longer, the tires sometimes have issues.

The transmission has a little problem here and there. The tires have been repainted once in a while, and the sun gets to the roof. Do you wake up every day and say, I get to be married to her. She is the most fantastic friend. She is the greatest treasure on this earth. I get to talk with her. I get to be with her. I get to look at all she can do, and I'm still learning from her. And she helps, and she interfaces with me. Life is fabulous. If so, you have a relationship that is respectful, thinking of others, things that are pure, lovely, just, good report, virtue, praiseworthy, and you're meditating on those things.

I don't know about you, but I love being married to my wife. My biggest nightmare is worrying sometimes when the phone doesn't ring and she's shopping and something might have happened to her if I can't get in touch with her. What about other relationships? What about his boss? What about children? Sometimes children can just drive you nuts because it's that one thing. What about the wonderful 99 other things about the kids? About your child, or about your parent.

If you're the child that just can't stand mom and dad, or you're going through this phase where you're developing independence, which is normal, but sometimes the process of stepping into independence can be made complicated if people don't do it properly. It can be one or two things that might be a little bit like tires blowing out on the freeway versus having the fabulous opportunity of parents or teens that that relationship brings.

So we need to meditate and be respectful and thinking good, praise worthy, things that are lovely. And those other things, I'm sure they exist. I don't know any of those. When I was young, I used to focus on a thing or two, and I decided one day, I'm just going to focus on the good things. And wow, life gets a whole lot better. Same with the church, same with almost anything. It's up to you. Are you going to dwell on the things that are lovely, good report, and virtuous, and praise worthy?

If so, that's going to enhance that relationship. Now, where is this going? What does God think when He thinks about you? This isn't just some little key point from a psychology publication. What does God think when He thinks about me? Does He think good thoughts? Or does He think that pain that irritates Him so much? Because, you know, God does get upset. You can read in the Bible. He does get upset, and He is coming to punish sin.

And He is coming back to bring vengeance upon those things that are offensive to Him and that irritate Him. Now, with that said, God thinks of you if you are repentant, if you're trying, if you're trying to obey Him, as holy. He thinks of you as an honorable, unique person in His family. He thinks of you as somebody of gold and silver, somebody He has highly expectations of having join Him and His Son at the Second Resurrection. If He thinks that about you and me, how should we think about others? If He thinks that about you, that you're good and that you're holy and you're a special part of His holy priesthood, a chosen people, why would I be thinking about that same person in a diminished or a way that is negative? We should elevate ourselves to thinking like the body of Christ, like the family of God does all the way up and down. That involves another point, which is forgiving and forgetting faults. I like what Paul says in Philippians 3. I think it's in verse 13. I always read that when I'm baptizing a person. Forgetting those things which are behind, I press forward to those things which are before for the prize of the high calling in Jesus Christ. That's what God wants us to do. He wants us to repent, be washed clean, forget it, move forward. That's how God sees you. See? We got on our knees. We said, Father, I messed up here. I'm sorry I did this wrong. I'm still struggling. I'm going to try better. Good. Clean, flush, gone. Do over, start over. Beautiful. I love that. We need to do that for each other. All too often we carry the tails. We carry the stars. I know about that person. I know years ago that person did this, and I've got him in his box. In our own families we can do this, with our friends, in the church, people, in the neighborhood, wherever it is. We can hold these things against them while at the same time. That is not part of Godly relationships. It's not what God does for you and me. In fact, he says, if you don't forgive others and give them a clean slate, I won't forgive you.

So we need to actually be going beyond just forgiving someone. We need to wash it away, clean it away. It will take time. It can be done with the mind of God. Remember what it says in Proverbs 17, verse 9. He who covers a transgression seeks love, but he who repeats a matter separates friends. So gossip and repeating things is part of the world system of fracturing, alienating relationships. He who covers a matter, a transgression, seeks love. Jesus Christ covers our transgressions and says to God, oh, guess what? This person here, they're perfect. God says, oh, great. No sins? Nope. Look. Satan says, oh, no, they're sinners. Jesus says, nope, they're not. I took that sin. No sin. See, he's the mediator. He's the advocate. He is the attorney, as it were. On our behalf, pleading in the court of law before the throne of God, we have our accuser, the adversary, who is trying to get us killed. And Jesus Christ is there saying, oh, no, this person is clean. The person is not guilty of anything. That's pretty good. He covers our transgression and he desires love. We need to do that as well. I have a lot of points we could go through. Let's go with one more. Ultimate relationships are trusting, they're committed, they're faithful. Use any or all of those terms. In other words, they're enduring their long term. They're not going to run away. It says in Hebrews 13 verse 5, breaking into the middle of the verse, For he himself has said, I will never leave you or forsake you. Now, that's quite a statement. Relationships on this earth are very conditional. You know, we have contracts, in fact, and these contracts all have escape clauses, including marital contracts.

There's always a way out of anything, but not with God. He himself has said, I will never leave you or forsake you. Now, we have said the same thing to him, actually, at baptism, didn't we? Count the cost. You're going to turn back from the plow, you can't make it. So he said, yes, I've counted the cost. I will go all the way, no matter what. He says, in counting that cost, he says, consider that if you put first, before the God family, your father, sister, mother, brother, yea, verily, your own life also, you can't be my disciple, you can't make it. So he said, we will do this, we will endure the end, no matter what it takes. That's a godly relationship. I don't think you will find that relationship with your car dealer.

I don't think it's going to be there, even with your house. Never leave you or forsake you. That is part of these ultimate relationships. We need to understand those relationships. We need to understand what we have said in the covenant to God, to our spouse, to our children. We have said before God, and we have vowed to never leave or forsake Him or them.

Verse 6 says, so that we may boldly say, the Lord is my helper I shall not fear. Now, in that relationship of Him being our helper, do we give Him fits sometimes? I'm sure we do.

Does He just shake His head and wonder why we sometimes think and do and sin after all He's done for us? I'm sure He does.

Does that cause Him to bolt? No. No, it does not. Covenant relationships are permanent.

A good example of covenant relationship or what they should include is mentioned in Ruth, Ruth 1, verse 16.

This was not a covenant relationship, but the wording of it is inspired to, I think, actually be what a covenant wording of a good covenant relationship might contain.

Ruth 1, verse 16.

Entreat me not to leave you. Those are interesting terms. No, there's beg me not to leave you.

Two-way street. We both, you and your spouse, you and Jesus Christ, have both vowed, I will never leave or forsake you. So let's entreat one another never to do that.

God entreats us not to do that. David prayed, don't take your spirit from me. Don't leave me or forsake me.

Ruth 1, verse 16. Entreat me not to leave you or to turn back from following after you.

For wherever you go, I will go. Wherever you lodge, I will lodge. Your people shall be my people and your God my God.

Doesn't that sound like the relationship we have with the God family? Your people are my people within the church. Christ, your people are my people. And your God, the Father, is my God.

And where you die, I will die. And there I will be buried. And the Lord do so to me, and more also, if anything, but death parts you and me.

I don't really think those are lofty words and commitments. I think they are honest. I think they are part of this type of an ultimate relationship that begins with the family of God's mindset of agape love and continues through a process of loving and respectful deeds with commitment that goes on forever.

To summarize, in conclusion, I'd like to let the Apostle Paul teach us how this all works together. This is a special relationship. It's for members only. Let's go back to 1 Peter 1 and verse 3. 1 Peter 1. Well, actually, let's look at 1 Peter real quick.

If we want to know who we are in the relationship, we can look at verse 3. 1 Peter 1 and verse 3. Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who according to His abundant mercy has begotten us again to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ through the dead. To an inheritance incorruptible and undefiled that does not fade away, reserved in heaven for you, who are kept by the power of God through faith for salvation, ready to be revealed in the last time. That is who you are. We are children of the Father, waiting for the resurrection to be revealed and live with them forever.

This relationship is unique. We need to understand what we are to be doing in this relationship. Verse 13 through 16 teaches us that. Therefore, gird up the loins of your mind and be sober and rest your hope fully upon the graciousness that is to be brought to you at the revelation of Jesus Christ.

As obedient children, not conforming yourselves to the former lust as in your ignorance, but as He who called you as holy, you also be holy in all your conduct because it is written, Be holy for I am holy. Now that's our challenge. How can we do that challenge? How can we accomplish that? We find that in verse 22.

You can't get this out on the street. You can't get this outside the church. Agape is only available through repentance and baptism and through the Holy Spirit within the context of the Church of God.

Having, verse 23, been engendered from above, not of corruptible seed, but incorruptible, through the Word of God, which lives and abides forever.

If we go to chapter 2 and verse 1, this process includes, therefore, laying aside all malice, all deceit, hypocrisy, envy, evil speaking, and as newborn babes desire the pure milk of the Word that you may grow thereby.

This Word of God is the food. It's the bread of life. It's only available in the Church, sadly, at this time.

We pray for the day when it will be open to all humans and everyone will have the opportunity. But for now, we're to grow by this.

If we look in verse 8, 1 Peter 3, we find the conclusion, finally. And guess what the conclusion is?

Finally, all of you be of one mind. That's what God is looking for. It's the ultimate in relationships, is oneness.

Oneness with God, oneness within the Church. This can only take place where God is and God lives in you through His Holy Spirit. It says in chapter 3, verse 8 again, finally, all of you be of one mind, having compassion for one another, agape as brothers.

Hmm. Can't have that outside the Church. This is where the brothers are. The brothers and the sisters, the brethren are here. Be tender-hearted, be courteous. In verse 10, it says, The face of the Lord is against those who do evil. No, brethren, we have this wonderful opportunity to have a relationship within the family of God and Heaven on earth that is unparalleled in all of human history.