Why God Made Marriage

Good afternoon to all of you. I'd like to say thank you for that beautiful special music. I had stepped out when the introduction was made, so I leaned over and asked Sue, did Chris write that? It sort of had his mark on it. It was beautiful and nice to see you. Well, siblings can harmonize in a way that seems unique, and then a husband and wife added to that. Pretty exciting. So I'm glad to be here. Sorry, my voice is a little bit off, and you know, I spent, what, it seemed like a month at Camp Buckeye earlier this week. Judy's laughing.

Working in the kitchen for my first time there, it was quite a job. So I came out a little bit worse for the wear, but I'll bounce back like I always do. And of course, I might look a little different than usual because I didn't want to wear a hair net on my face. So here I am anyways, and it's an exciting time. I mentioned, you know, Chris and Heather got married here in this room almost two weeks ago. Mr. Holiday mentioned he's coming up on his anniversary, and I really appreciate that sermonette laid the groundwork for my message today very well, if not covering some of the same material. But that's all right. It's something that's very important, and we've been looking at it quite a bit lately. And I'll say this is a very special day for me and Sue. It was 21 years ago today, on August 3rd, we stood together in front of many of our friends, members of our family, and we entered a covenant with each other and with God. We promised and covenanted with God to be husband and wife, and sickness and in health, and good times and in difficult times, for as long as we both live. Now, you could call us slow bloomers because we were both in our 30s at the time, but I'd say that put us in a good position to appreciate the change in our lives. Now, this is something that the ABC students will have heard me say before, and if you're coming in, you'll hear me say it again, but I was single for a long time, and then I got married.

Married is better. Married has certainly been much better for me. You might talk to Sue privately later to see if she thinks it's been as much good, but I'm confident, though, that I'm making I can make a general statement that for most people, marriage is the better state.

When we marry within God's laws and within his guidance, when we conduct ourselves in marriage the way God intended and designed it to be, marriage is fulfilling. It causes us to grow and to mature. I would say grow and mature mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. Not to mention, being married is fun.

Sue said that just earlier today, I think, didn't you? Something about being married was getting married was a lot of fun. I don't know how many times she said, can we go back and get married again? That was a blast, but it doesn't work that way. Marriage benefits people in so many ways because God made it to be that way. And that could lead us to stop and ask the question, did he have to do it that way? Why did God make male and female? And I appreciate Mr. Holiday making the case. He definitely did. And I'm going to look at a couple of the same scriptures, but why did God make us with what we could call sexuality? You know, male or female? And he made us to need and to want to be together. God's Word shows that God made these things to help us to learn about him and have a better relationship with him. So that's what I want to focus on today. Being our anniversary, it seemed like it would be hard to focus on much else. So I said, let's go for it. You don't have the Sabbath on which you're assigned to speak. Fall on your anniversary that often. So we're going to talk a little bit about why God made marriage. And in doing that, I first want to, you know, I want this to be not so much an exposition or a talk on how to be married, how to be a good husband or a good wife. I believe Mr. Dean spent some time on that a couple of weeks ago, although I believe that was in the morning service. So some of you may have heard it, some may not. But I want to talk about what marriage is and why. So it might be good to talk about the fact that I believe God did create marriage. Not only I believe it, the Bible shows He created the institution. It was not some social construct that primitive men came up with as a way to subjugate and control women, despite what some bit might tell you. For that matter, it's not something that women came up with to subjugate and control men. I really thought I'd get chuckles at that. Maybe I didn't deliver that line properly.

I want to, for my first scripture, turn to Matthew 19, if you will. Jesus Christ had some important comments on marriage. Matthew 19 will begin in verse 3.

Not without me being able to read what it says. Okay, I'm jumping into this, but here it says, the Pharisees also came to Him, that is to Jesus, testing Him and saying to Him, is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for just any reason? Now, this question doesn't really address whether marriage was an invention of men or created by God, but Jesus' answer does address that. In verse 4, He answered and said to them, have you not read that...

Let me get the right page. Have you not read that He, who made them at the beginning, that was God, made them male and female, and said, for this reason? What reason?

Well, the reason is that He made them male and female. For this reason, a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh. So then, they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore, what God has joined together, let not man separate.

And what God joined together was one man to one woman. And that shows us that God did create marriage. That's why we refer to it in our marriage ceremony as a divine institution.

And He obviously created humans, male and female, with the intention that they would both come together to create one union that is marriage. And actually, we'll see in a moment, God didn't wait very long after He made man and woman to join them in marriage. It seemed that it happened right away, almost as soon as they were brought together. Not only did God join Adam and Eve in marriage—remember what it says here if you're still in Matthew 19—you know, therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate. I believe that not only did God join Adam and Eve, but God joins the bond of every marriage for every man and woman who marry legitimately. There might be some marriages that God doesn't respect. I don't have anything particular in mind, and certainly no one in this room, but I don't know if there's something on some Polynesian island somewhere that God doesn't—no, I should watch it. I don't mean anything against Polynesians. But what I do want to say is a marriage, a godly marriage, is a three-way covenant between husband, wife, and God. Not just the husband and wife. God is at the center of it.

Now, the Pharisees went on to ask about old covenant regulations on divorce, and Christ's answer is very important, but that's not something I want to address right now. But we're going to come back to it later, so I want to go back to Genesis, even though we were there a little bit ago. You might keep a marker or a finger here in Matthew 19, but let's look again at God's creation of marriage. In Genesis chapter 1—Genesis 1, and as we read in verse 27—was it Mr. Armstrong used to say, repetition is one of the best forms of emphasis—so God created man in his own image, God's own image. In the image of God, he created him male and female. He created them, and God blessed them and said, Be fruitful and multiply. Fill the earth and subdue it. Have dominion over the fish of the sea, over the birds of the air, over every living thing that moves on the earth. So I wanted to read this account of creation to remind us, partly, as Mr. Holiday said, both men and women are created in God's image. Eve wasn't made in Adam's image, even though she was made from his substance. And I've heard various speculations on why. Why not make Eve directly out of the dust to the ground like Adam? Well, maybe then they'd get an argument, say, My dust was better than your dust. No, they came from the same dust, but they're both in God's image. And that's not to say that there aren't differences, certainly. And as the French say, vive la difference.

Now, I wonder if people watching on the webcast are enjoying this as much. One of the things I like to say, though, is because men and women are different, but both in God's image. Now, this is a dunkalism, if you would say, but I think God might have made some of his characteristics and traits more predominant in men, and some of his other characteristics and traits more predominant in women. And when man and woman are joined in marriage, they're most in the image of God, because it brings together all of those traits. You know, the two become one. Both men and women were told to be fruitful and multiply. This indicates that having children was at least one reason and a big reason for God creating sexuality and marriage. I don't think it's necessarily the only reason, though. And we can note, though, that both men and women were given dominion over the planet. Not just men having dominion. And I don't say it that way to dispute what I think is a very clear biblical teaching that the husband is the head of the family. I'm not stepping on that ground. 1 Corinthians 11, verse 3, is one of a number of scriptures that make that case. So men and women given dominion over the planet, but a husband and father is to be the head of the family. Now, if you read through the book of Genesis, it seems very clear that God inspired Moses to include two different accounts of the creation of man. The briefer one in chapter one and a longer, more detailed one in the second chapter. And that might tell us a little bit more about why God created men and women. So let's jump to chapter 2, verse 21. It says, And God, the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall on Adam, and he slept. And he, that is God, took one of his, Adam's ribs, and closed up the flesh in its place. Then the rib which the Lord God had taken from man, made into a woman. And he brought her to the man, and Adam said, This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh. She shall be called woman because she was taken out of man.

So we see, you know, the woman was made in God's image, but was made after the man and was brought to the man. And it was Adam who said, She's bone of my bones, flesh of my flesh. I'm going to call her woman. But it seems that from what we read in Matthew 19, that the words in verse 24 were spoken by God. It was God that said, Therefore, a man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. And it tells us they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed. I read that last part to not to discuss if, when, or why they started wearing clothing. We know they did eventually because God gave them some clothing. But I read that to show from that moment they were husband and wife. God refers to them as husband and wife. I've heard some speculate that it was God who performed the first wedding. I wonder, did he have a little black book with this? I don't know. And you could argue maybe he didn't, but certainly, you know, he made them married. And if you're looking for a woman who was made just for you, Adam is the one person that experienced that. It's interesting, I had the sermon prepared, and yesterday I happened to watch the episode of Magnified that came out a couple weeks ago where Micah Gunn addresses that very subject, and he and I are see eye to eye on that. But God created marriage, and he created it as a union of one man with one woman. Now, with that in mind, let's go back to Matthew 19. If you have a finger there, which I don't, you'll get there much more quickly. Matthew 19, remember they asked Jesus about, you know, is it okay to divorce for just any reason? He said, that's not what God intended, what God joined, let not man separate. So in verse 7, they ask him, well, why did Moses command to give a certificate of divorce and put her away? Okay, this is a question that follows up what Jesus said, and he said to them, Moses, because of the hardness of your hearts, permitted you to divorce your wives. From the beginning, it was not so. And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery. And whoever marries her who is divorced, commits adultery. We commonly cite this to show that although a marriage can be dissolved for very specific reasons, God did not intend marriage to end. He didn't want divorce. And while we're drawing some parallels, part of that is because if marriage is to help us to learn about our relationship with God, we should understand God does not want to be divorced. We should not want our relationship with Him to ever end. We should never consider a divorce from God.

Now, because we're human, God directed Moses to write some regulations to mitigate a pretty bad thing. Mitigated as best could, because humans will do some... we make mistakes. 1 Corinthians chapter 7 addresses another factor regarding an unconverted mate. And again, that's not my point to get into. The point is that God intended marriage to be one man and one woman for the rest of their lives. But I find it interesting, the thought of God's regulations to regulate divorce being to make a bad thing that people will do less bad. I wonder if that applies also to the rules that regard polygamy. In the beginning, God did not intend divorce, and I think He also clearly did not intend more than one man and one woman to constitute a marriage. We see that plainly from what God did at creation. Interestingly, in the book of Malachi, some of the same themes are addressed. It's actually not very far from Matthew. The book just before it. If you turn back to Malachi chapter 2, we'll begin in verse 16.

And of course, Malachi 2, 16 has one of the plainest statements we could have. For the Lord God of Israel says, He hates divorce. It covers one's garments with violence. And well, I don't need to read all the rest of the Scripture, but it certainly fits with what Christ said and with what we read in Genesis. Now, I don't want to make this all about divorce, but I will say one thing I think I should very clearly before we move on to my other focus, that I think it says here that God hates divorce. It does not say He hates divorced people or people who are involved in divorce. You know, it might be a bad thing. It's unfortunate, it's sad, and it's harmful, but being involved in a divorce does not cut a person off from God's love, from God's mercy. And it shouldn't cut a person off from our love and our support either. So we should understand that. Having said that, let's back up in Malachi 2 to verse 14. He's addressing some of this subject. He says, Yet you say, and this is written somewhat as a dialogue between God and some of the priests in Judah, Yet you say, for what reason? Well, the Lord has been witness between you and the wife of your youth, with whom you've dealt treacherously and refers to divorce as he gets to later, yet she's your companion, your wife by covenant. But did he not make them one, having a remnant of the Spirit? And why one? He seeks godly offspring. Therefore, take heed your spirit, let none deal treacherously with the wife of his youth.

God-seeking, godly offspring aligns well with that command in Genesis 1, verse 28, saying, Be fruitful and multiply. So I think this fits with that. But there is an interpretation of this passage that also confirms our definition of marriage being between only one man and one woman. Because if you look in verse 15, sorry, that verse is divided between the front and back of this page of my Bible. But it says, Did he not make them one, having a remnant of the Spirit?

Now, does that sound a bit odd to you? You know, we don't think of God's Spirit in terms of having a remnant. You know, what does that mean? If you have the older King James version, instead of remnant, it uses the word a residue of the Spirit. Well, the Hebrew word is, I believe, pronounced shayar. I've got it transliterated as S-H-E-A-R. And it is best translated as a remnant, a residue, or a leftover. I just had visions of Tupperware, although that wasn't in my mind when I wrote this. But a remnant does tend to mean something that's left over after taking care of the job or purpose that it was made for. Like if you put carpet down in your house, when all the floors are covered, if there's some carpet left over, it's called a remnant. And I remember I've heard carpet stores telling us they're having a remnant sale. You can go get this real cheap square carpet, which makes a great area rug if you're not too particular. Okay, I get it. Carpet can have remnants. But does God's Spirit have remnant? No. If you look again in Malachi 2.15, it says, did He not make them one? Did you notice in most of our Bibles, them is in italics, which means that word is not in the original Hebrew. It was provided by the translators to help understand the meaning. And with that word in there, the meaning seems to be God made Adam and Eve one. He makes a husband and wife one. And I certainly agree with that. He certainly did.

That doesn't answer the question, well, what in the world does it mean to have a remnant of the Spirit after He made them one? Well, I might not have the answer, but I'll say some Bible scholars, not all, but you can find it in a number of commentaries, think that what was originally intended here does not require the word them to be added. And if you read it without, it says, did He not make one having a remnant of the Spirit? And it's talking about wives, right? He made one wife. It could possibly mean that if you think of what we saw in Genesis 1 and 2 in those creation accounts, that God made one wife for Adam. Yeah, He made Eve. He still had plenty of the Holy Spirit. He still had plenty of creative power. God could have made a hundred wives for Adam, but He didn't, because God is smart. Well, I think we already know that, but God didn't intend polygamy. He never intended a man to have several wives at once. But as with divorce, when God gave His civil law to Israel, He had Moses include some regulations, you know, because of the bad things humans would do, even though they shouldn't. So to make the best of a bad situation in a sense. So this interpretation of Malachi 2.15 would indicate that one husband and one wife is the type of marriage. It's the setting that God intended for raising children.

God didn't want children raised in a harem. He doesn't want children raised by a guy and a group of sister wives. No, children ideally are to be raised by a husband and a wife who are mother and father. Now, in the ideal world, it doesn't always work that way, but we could see that's what God intended, and He made marriage that way. And this supports, again, the idea that procreation was a big reason why God created sexuality and He created marriage. He made us the way we are.

I think we can make a case, though, that Scripture shows that having babies wasn't the only reason. Maybe not even the most important reason, depending on how you define important.

Now, if you've been in God's church your whole life, you might not be aware that there are Christian denominations that teach that sex is a necessary evil. You know, it's bad, you know, and it's only there for making babies, and that should be the only reason you ever participate in it. You know, that teaching implies we'd be better off if we didn't have sexuality. And that leads to the idea of, as in the Catholic Church, having a celibate priesthood and celibate nuns. Well, they're wrong. That's not true that that's better. You know, the Apostle Paul actually directly refutes that if you want to turn to 1 Corinthians chapter 7. We'll get into some of Paul's comment on the subject here. 1 Corinthians, yes, not Romans. Okay, Paul's writing to the congregation in Corinth, and he says, now concerning the things of which you wrote to me, it's good for a man not to touch a woman. Well, Paul is saying that some, at least one person in the Corinthian congregation proposed to him that it'd be good. It'd be better for the people involved to never touch a woman.

Now, the context makes it clear that when he says touch, he doesn't mean actually bump into them in the hallway. You know, he's not talking about that you should never shake hands with a woman or anything like that. You know, the discussion here is talking about sexual relations. And Paul immediately corrects the wrong assumption. In verse 2, he says, nevertheless, because of sexual immorality, let each man have his own wife, and let each woman have her own husband. Let the husband render his wife the affection do her, and likewise also the wife her husband. Now, we could question, well, what did he mean by affection do? You know, a kiss on the cheek is a nice way to show affection. But it's pretty clear in the context Paul is here discussing passion. He's talking about the normal attraction between men and women. If you look at verse 5, he says, do not deprive one another, except with consent for a time to give yourselves to fasting and prayer. Then come together again so Satan doesn't tempt you because of your lack of self-control. Similarly, in verse 9, he says, if they can't exercise self-control, let them marry. It's better to marry than to burn with passion. Now, I'm not reading the whole chapter, but he has some discussion that, well, because of the present evil time, maybe it's better to put off getting married. But then he says, yeah, but it's better to get married than be burning up with passion that you can't handle. Okay, I'm trying to choose my words very carefully here. This is in my notes. I believe it's proper to leave to parents of young children the ability to discuss this with their children when and how they want to, certainly. But I've heard some ministers point out, and even some in other churches than ours, that Christian churches often leave totally alone the subject of sexuality and marriage. They don't want to talk about it. But it turns out others like to talk about it. Satan will be glad to talk to your children about sex. And I say that in a generalized term. I think that fits with what Mr. Holiday was saying. There is a fight to blur the truth and disguise it and lead people astray. So we need to teach our children the truth, but teach them as they're ready and able. So if it sounds like I'm about to say something you don't want your children to hear, you can put your hands over their ears. I don't think I'm going to do that.

And I should say, here in 1 Corinthians 7 and all through the Bible, God's standards and His expectations are quite clear. Sexual intimacy and intercourse are only for marriage. Sex is not permitted outside of the marriage union. But marriage was created with sex as one of its intrinsic vital elements. And another way of saying is, it's required.

And we might still have that question. Well, why? Why did God make it that way? Because it can be difficult to deal with. You know, as we've seen, we might assume that God created sexual desire only to ensure that children would be born. But did He have to do it that way? Did God create a powerful drive within us, one that can be difficult to control, only so we would reproduce?

Couldn't He have done it some other way? Maybe an easier way. I'm going to take a leap and propose that I think He could have. He did it with other life forms. You know, bacteria and other single-celled biological life forms, they reproduce asexually. Plants pollinate. Fish do something similar with their eggs, am I right? You can tell I'm not a medical doctor or a biologist. What I'm saying is, you know, maybe, you know, I don't want to get silly, but, you know, just think an all-powerful Creator God who has all wisdom and all knowledge, who made the wondrous variety we see in the world almost certainly could have created some way for human reproduction without the necessity of what we call sex or sexuality. You know, maybe He could have really had the storks do it. When I say really, in case some of you youngsters think that is, you know, I never was told that when I was a kid. But at any rate, He didn't do it some other way, and God doesn't do things without a good reason. So He must have had some good reasons for sexuality and marriage, for making us male and female. And Ephesians chapter 5 is one of the places we learn that. If you want to begin turning there... Now, starting in Ephesians 5 verse 21, all the way to the end of the chapter, Paul explains proper roles and responsibilities of husbands and wives. But he also addresses the why question, which would be helpful for me to go there if I'm going to do that myself. Dropping down to verse 31 of Ephesians 5, it says, For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother, and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh. By the way, this is the third place in Scripture we've read that, so it must be pretty important. Paul goes on to say, this is a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ and the church. That's what I alluded to or said outright in my introduction. Marriage helps us learn about our relationship with God, and it was intended to be that way.

But without that understanding, it's a great mystery. Mankind for millennia has questioned why are things the way they are. It's a question referred to all the time in literature and music. Is it the sound of—no, not the sound of music. My fair lady, Henry Higgins, things why can't a woman be more like a man? I can't remember the tune for that one. When I think of that question, though, I think of the Muppet, the Muppet movie. Remember Kermit the Frog? He's heartbroken about Miss Piggy, and he meets Ralph the Dog, and they start singing, you can't live with him, you can't live without him. There's something, something about him. We keep a trying because the nights are long. I hope that something better comes along.

There's nothing better. God made it so one—men and women are best for each other. But it's been a mystery. Now, I know my singing voice isn't the best, but—and if you haven't seen the original Muppet movie, put it on your list, by all means. Okay.

By the way, I'm sure there are a lot of good pop culture references of women having these questions about men. I just—I'm a man, so I don't remember any of those. But Paul gives the answer to that great mystery. It's about Christ and the Church. And Paul doesn't just say it here, back up to earlier in the chapter in verse 25, husbands love your wives just as Christ also loved the Church and gave himself for her. If you back up one more to verse 24, therefore, just as the Church is subject to Christ, so let wives be subject to their own husbands and everything.

This passage in Ephesians has been expounded on many times on how we should conduct ourselves in marriage. How should husbands love their wives? What exactly does it mean for a wife to be subject to her own husband? I'm not going to delve into that today in any detail. To be honest, I'm not there yet. I'm still learning. I appreciate when Mr. Dean gave his sermon, he said, when you reach 50 years, maybe you know something about it. I'm not even halfway there yet. But I could say that we should be emulating Jesus Christ. So in simple form, if you want to be a good husband, be a godly man. Do what the Bible says. If you want to be a good wife, be a godly woman. And do what God's Word tells you to do. I could say that and some might say, but Frank, you're oversimplifying things. It's really complicated. I set it up that way so I could quote Aaron Dean again, because I love when he says this. He says, it's not complicated, it's just hard.

And I think that's true. We might say it's complicated, but it's not that it's complicated. It can be hard to do. God never promised it would be easy. It's not easy to have a good marriage. It's not easy to be a good Christian.

Not easy, but well worth it. On both counts. God didn't design it to be easy. He designed it to help us to grow and develop. God wants to bring many sons to glory in his family. Hebrews 2 verse 10. And where it says sons, it could mean spiritual children, so women aren't excluded. To be born into God's family, though, we need to become like God.

Marriage gives us a laboratory in which to practice. One of the best ones to learn and grow and develop.

If you're still in Ephesians chapter 5 verse 21, I backed all the way up to the start, but it says, submitting to one another in the fear of God. Both husbands and wives get to practice submission.

They also get to practice love and devotion, service and sacrifice, the fear of God.

And you might wonder, would we make ourselves go through all this? All the hardship of marriage. And I say hardship. Remember, I said it's better. It's fun. But even if it's sometimes difficult, would we do it just if we say, oh, it's making me better? Some of us maybe would not, because it's hard. It can be painful at times. We would be tempted to just give up or not even start in the first place.

And that's where I say maybe, just maybe, that's part of why God gave us sexuality and made us male and female. He made us so each desires to connect and be with the other. I'm not going to turn back to Genesis 2.18 since Mr. Holiday read it. I've got it in my notes. Genesis 2.18 says, the Lord God said, it's not good that man should be alone. I'll make a helper comparable to him. It's not good to be alone. Being lonely can be terrible. And I say that, you know, I said I was in my 30s, well into my 30s, when I got married, and I had a good life.

But I felt something was missing. You know, I wanted something more. God built that into human beings. He built it into us to want that to have that desire for companionship, for connection, and for physical intimacy. I wonder if God built that into us so that we would better understand that God desires companionship. God wants to connect with us.

I wouldn't go so far as to say he's lonely, because I'm not sure that I'm qualified to describe God's characteristics, and there's no place in the Bible that says he's lonely. But it's very clear God does not intend to be alone. You know, he intends to have many children in his family. We've said many times, God is building a family. And the imagery that God uses in Scripture, and through the prophets, we see some great analogies of God marrying Israel, and then, you know, being hurt by Israel, but still wanting to re-establish the relationship.

God's not indifferent. God is not casually interested in building a family. God has a strong desire to maintain a relationship with each of us. And that's one thing, of course, there's a vital difference. He made us to only be married to one other person, and he made us to only have a relationship with one God, but he's God. He can have a relationship with each and every one of us that doesn't take away from his relationship with the others.

And how does he do that? I couldn't understand it, probably, if he told me. But I think, you know, that the exclusivity that he built into marriage reflects how he wants us to exclusively worship and love only him as God. And I've heard some teach that that's a big part of why God made us sexual beings, built into us that desire to have a close, enduring, exclusive relationship with one other person.

That even can help us to understand that we have sexuality even when we're not married. You know, most people who are single know they're single, and they feel that desire for a relationship that they don't have. Like, it's built in, and I think God put it there for a reason. Now, I'm not just talking about an intellectual desire or wish, but I also don't want us to think of it as a carnal lust that has to be tamed and controlled. God gave us a drive, an impulse that's healthy and right and good, an impulse that'll motivate us to make great efforts to overcome tremendous obstacles so that we can be with that special person that we chose to join our lives to.

And if it's correct that part of the reason that God gave us marriage and sexuality is to help us to learn about and understand Him, then it makes sense that our learning about a relationship with God doesn't begin only after we get married. Some of the experience of being single and desiring to be married might help us understand the way God looks at us. And just like our need to relate to God doesn't just begin at baptism, we're building a relationship with God before baptism, and then we continue.

I worried I might be getting a little vague or unclear here, so I want to come back to how remembering how you felt before you were married. And if you're not married now, maybe how you feel right now, you'll want to be married. I wanted to be married. And I should comment when I'm talking about this, I don't want to overlook the fact that, as I said, we understand that sexual intimacy was intended only for within marriage.

That's the only place it's permissible, and that's part of what makes us want to marry someone. You know, when we're s... Let me start that sentence over again. When we're single, we're willing to sacrifice, willing to exert great effort in order to join lives with that one person. Just had an image when Sue and I were dating. She lived south of the Ohio River, and I lived in Columbus. I remember drive down in meter for services, and we'd go out and date, and then, you know, it'd be after midnight, okay, time to go home. I got to drive two hours. That wasn't the most fun thing, but it was nothing because I was going to be with her.

Paul said marriage is a mystery, but it's about Christ and the Church. I think God wants to have a close, deep, exclusive relationship with each one of us, and that impulse we feel to have that might be showing how God feels. How much joy does that relationship bring to God?

How much joy does a relationship with you, do you think, bring to God? I want to read what I think is a telling scripture on the subject. It's on Isaiah 62 and verse 5. Isaiah 62 verse 5, and this is in the middle of some prophecies of the millennium and with Israel, and so part of this, the first part of the verse doesn't make as much sense pulling it out of context, so I'm only going to read the second half because I don't think it's wrong to bring that out. So the second half of Isaiah 62.5 says, and as the bridegroom rejoices over the bride, so shall your God rejoice over you. Let's not just move past that quickly. As the bridegroom, or nowadays we just say as the groom rejoices over the bride, so will God rejoice over you. Man, how happy were you when you finally married your bride? We get a couple of newlyweds. They looked really happy after that ceremony. I gotta say, I pulled out Sui Anai's wedding pictures and so did we. I hope all of us felt that way. If you're not happy, maybe something was wrong. And by the way, women, how happy were you? I still remember a particular moment in Sui Anai's wedding, and she's heard me tell this story a number of times. A lot of our students have heard me tell it, so sorry, ABC students. But there I was. I was standing in front of the crowd, you know, the family and friends, and my groomsmen were lined up behind me. Mr. Ed Smith was right here. He performed our wedding, and the bridesmaids, one at a time, came down and they lined up. And then the music changed. Everyone stood up, and around the corner came Sue with her two parents. And boy, it was a pretty dress. And she was looking as good as I've ever seen her, and I just had this feeling come over me. I was just so happy, and tears came to my eyes. I wasn't crying because, oh no, now I'm getting the ball and chain. I was a bridegroom rejoicing over my bride. You know, I wasn't thinking of Isaiah 62.5 then, but every time I read the Scripture now, it makes me think of what I just told you, of being that happy. And this is saying that God is that happy about you.

The thought of the relationship with you that He wants to build fills Him with that kind of joy. He doesn't just say a husband and a wife. He's talking about bride and groom, because that's a special joy that happens once in your life. Can you believe it?

It is hard to believe, I know. I wouldn't even say it if it weren't printed right here in my Bible.

Now, maybe it will help if I admit that every moment of every day in my marriage has not always been quite so joyous. Not as fun as the wedding day was. No, there have been ups and downs, as the ceremony says, good times and difficult times. Perhaps it's that way for God with us.

I'm reasonably certain that God has not been completely happy with me every moment since I was baptized. No, there have been good times, but also difficult times. Does that mean that I failed as a Christian? I don't think so. Any more than my marriage has been a failure, just because Sue and I sometimes have had difficult times. I can say I know Sue better today than I did on our wedding day, and honestly can say I love her more. I think I love her in a better way than I did, and I'm probably not alone in that sentiment. I think it's common among those who are married.

God made it to work that way, and if marriage is about Christ in the Church, perhaps each of us can know and love God more and in a better way now than we did on the day we were baptized. Maybe God loves us more. Hopefully we are growing and developing, becoming more like Him, and becoming more like Him all the more for going through good times and difficult times.

So, on the anniversary of mine and Sue's wedding, I thought it would be instructive and encouraging to review what God made marriage to be, and to emphasize God did create it, and He created it to be what was commonly understood for thousands of years, a union of one man with one woman, and tended to last a lifetime. God intended marriage to teach us important principles about His relationship with us, about the spiritual family that God is building, and marriage provides opportunity to practice living God's way. As I said, the way for good husbands and wives, the way for us to be good husbands and wives is do what the Bible says, and that's not easy.

But it also helps us to learn and experience God's ways. God is patient. God is forgiving. God is kind. As it says in 1 John 4 verse 8, God is love. And in marriage, we get to practice and experience what true agape, that is, godly, self-sacrificing love is all about. And as good as all that is, it's still tough at times. Good times, difficult times. But again, perhaps that's part of why God made sexuality as part of the marriage. It helps compel us to still want that marriage relationship. You know, motivates us to live with one other person, to endure and overcome difficult times, and that helps us to understand our relationship with God. It's a mystery, but it's about Christ and the Church.