Taking Our Parenting Cues From the Supreme Parent

Some of us in here are great-grandparents. Some of us are grandparents. Now, of course, obviously, you get to be a great-grandparents. You've got to be a grandparent first, right? And, of course, to be a grandparent, you've got to be a parent, right? So, great-grandparents, grandparents, parents. Some of us in here have raised children, reared children.

Some of us are still in the process of raising children, rearing children. Some of us will yet, you know, have opportunity to raise children, rear children, in this life. But all of us, as first-fruits, will be helping to raise God's children someday, assisting Jesus Christ, and helping raise God's children in the world tomorrow. Both the millennial stretch and the last great day, the eighth day. So, what I'll talk about today has meaning, actually, for all of us.

You know, one of God's names is Father, and God does not name anything in vain, or according to something that doesn't fit with the meaning. One of His names is Father because He is a parent. He has children. We are part of His children, aren't we? God also is supreme. The Father is supreme.

He's supreme. He's a parent. So, that makes Him the supreme parent. And again, as a parent, He has children to deal with. Have you ever just stopped and done a Bible study, or a good stretch of time of meditating on?

How does He deal with His children? How does He deal with us? What is His manner of parenting? How does He deal first and foremost with His children? And if you stop to think about whether you're a great-grandparent, you're a parent, or you're hoping to be a parent someday, have you thought about taking your cues from the supreme parent? I'll title this sermon right up front. Taking our parenting cues from the supreme parent. Because that's what I want to talk about.

Taking our parenting cues from the supreme parent. And it actually has meaning, again, for all of us. Because it's not just in this life with flesh and blood, but it's even going to involve how we deal with the flesh and blood that will be in the millennium, and in the eighth day. So, if we talk about taking our cues from our parenting cues from the supreme parent, where's a good place to start?

Well, I think it is with the word that defines the supreme parent. L-O-V-E. Agape. God is love. And if you say, well, in one sense, what is love? Is it just a feeling, just an emotion? No, it can involve that, yes, but there's so much more than that. And one way of expressing God's love, or God is love, is that God is concerned in action.

He's concerned in action. His concern is put into action. God knows how to express concern. He can teach us how to express it. So, here's my first point. I'm not going to tell you how many points there are because you'll count them down. Here's my first point. Your children will love you because you first love them. 1 John 4, 19. This is a principle of reciprocity, or the law of reciprocity, however you want to word it.

1 John 4, 19. John makes this point. John, who is known as the apostle of love, makes this point about God. In 1 John 4, 19, he says, we love Him because He first loved us. Because He first loved us. Taking your cues from the supreme parent, your children will love you because you first love them. You know, the responsibility for a strong family unit falls first on the husband and wife.

I want to go back and just read this, not explore it fully, but just primarily read it and take something from it here in Malachi 4, verses 5 and 6. Malachi 4, verses 5 and 6. For God, in this prophecy through Malachi says, Behold, I will send you Elijah the prophet before the coming of the great and dreadful day of the Lord. And you look at part of the purpose that's expressed here, a very important purpose.

And He shall turn the heart of the fathers to the children, and the heart of the children to their fathers, lest I come and smite the earth with a curse. Obviously, there's more than one layer of depth in this statement. But just taking it on the surface even, He shall turn the heart of the fathers, the heart of the parents, to the children. That comes first. We love Him because He first loved us, the law of reciprocity, the heart of the fathers, or the parents, to the children, and in a reciprocal way, the heart of the children to their fathers.

Now, obviously, there's even deeper meaning than what I'm covering. But I'm taking some of the initial meaning of it to make the point. The responsibility is first ours. You know, our children didn't bring themselves into being. We did. It's wondrous. It's a tremendous miracle of God's living laws that He grants us the opportunity to exercise those laws in a way that a brand new, unique human being is created. Yes, they are, in one sense, genetically, their parents from the standpoint that the makeup of their DNA came from their parents, which some of it came from grandparents known back.

Genetics is a fascinating study. But that said, each human being is a brand new, unique being introduced into the universe, like unto no other. Very specific and very unique. And so, having that wonderful opportunity and exercising it, we incurred a responsibility toward them. We obligated ourselves to them. We do owe them something. You know, I've only taken three vows in my life, and that's all I intend to take. I do not intend to take any vows other than the three that I've taken.

The first vow I took, and people don't think of it as a vow necessarily, but it is. It's baptism. That's a vow. That is a vow. You're vowing to God to belong to Him for forgiveness and cleansing and all, that you're His property. That's a vow. We don't use the word vow in this ceremony, but it is a vow.

It's the most important vow you can ever make. The second vow that I took is the marriage vow, and we do use the word vow and vows in the marriage ceremony. And then the third vow that I took, and I took the third vow three times, and we don't call it a vow. We don't think of it as the vow, but when you decide to have children, and you have children, you are vowed to them to be their parent, to love them, to provide for them, to protect, to encourage, to operate according to God's laws.

We owe it to them to deal with them, and that responsibility, in a God-pleasing, God-designed way. And again, these are things we will practice not only in this life, but we will put these things into practice also as we work with the children of God during the Millennial time and also the last great day. Turn the hearts of the parents to the children first, and the children return automatically to the parents. That's reciprocity.

Again, that's 1 John 4.19. And again, who came first? The parent or the child? Well, obviously, the parent. Who first had the responsibility to act or to initiate action from the very beginning? Well, the parent, obviously. So again, let's take our cues or lessons from the Supreme Parent Father, the Supreme Father. Okay, that first point went back kind of quickly. The other 20 won't. No, there's not 20 more.

I'm just kidding. Some of them will go slower, maybe a little bit more involved. Okay, number 2. Involve your children. Involve your children. Now, this has been more on my mind recently. I know we've had the blessing of little children here already, but due to the birth and all that were involved in the timings, we had to postpone blessing of little children in Chattanooga until next Sabbath. We have at least three that I know of, and I was informed last Sabbath up there that there may be two more.

So, anyhow, I'll be having the blessing of little children up there next week. So, I just had this subject on my mind. I thought, well, that would be a good, timely time to give it. Not that any time wouldn't be timely for it. Involve your children. Make them apart. Somebody once said that if parents keep their children out of their world, their children will keep them out of their world. And you do see that.

You see parents who are divorced from the world of their children. They're not involved with their kids. And you see the kids very early on many times beginning to block their parents out of their world. And it's the opposite of what we call bunding. Bunding. You know, bunding, when people bind and they come together and there's more and more of a unity and identity with each other, and a sharing. Bunding. Sharing your time. Sharing your love. Sharing your attention.

In a very obvious, direct way. Well, they know I love them. Do they? Yeah, I know I love them. But how do you go about showing it? God is love. God is concern and action. And obvious action. Sharing your time, love and attention in a very obvious, direct way with your children. And especially when they are little. Especially when they're little. Not saying, well, yeah, when they're a whole year old, or two years old, or three years old, or four years old, and it really matters and means something to them, I will.

I had a ministerial meeting down in Mobile, Alabama. And my wife was in the Baptist Hospital in Montgomery, Alabama. And she had just given birth to, and I was there when she gave birth to, the most beautiful little girl. My first child, our first child, my daughter, Lee Ann. And when she was delivered there in the birthing room, they swaddled her and handled her to me.

And I held her and she looked just, they said, baby, can't focus. A newborn can't really focus. But she looked just as direct into my eyes as anybody ever has.

The next day or so, I had to go to a meeting in Mobile. Of course, I day-tripped it. But I had one hour late that day to get to spend with my daughter in the hospital. And I made sure I got out of there in time to get back. Left early, got down there, was involved in what I needed to be. And I made sure that I got back to have my one hour of sitting there and just holding my daughter. And she was only like a day, maybe two days old, but only a day or two old. That was all. And sat there and held her for that hour. Now, you start as early from the moment of birth on. One of the most basic fundamental and important needs is the need to mean something to someone.

Isn't it wonderful when you know that you mean something, really mean something to somebody?

That need is in us. It's part of our makeup. God's the one who put it there. It's one of the most basic fundamental and important needs, the need to mean something to someone. It gives you a value. It gives you a worth that can be given no other way. And without that, you're very poor. You're very poor. To mean something to no one, to not mean anything to anyone. To mean something to no one is one of the greatest poverty.

Caring and loving and being concerned, it must be shown in a direct, obvious way. It must be expressed. It must be obvious. Notice this proverb, Proverbs 27, verse 5. Proverbs 27, verse 5.

Open rebuke is better than secret love. Now, what's that saying? Open rebuke is better than secret love. To care, to be concerned, to love and just keep it hidden, not express it, not show it, you'd not really be shown or known or expressed that there is love there. It's secret. It's hidden. It's buried. It's not exercised. It's not obvious. It's not direct. That is worse than open rebuke, getting openly corrected. Have you ever known a kid that would do something negative or bad to get attention, even though it was going to bring correction? Because though the child doesn't reason it out, they would rather have bad attention than no attention at all. And that's why a lot of times they will do things to get attention, even though it's correction, because they want attention. And so some attention, even though it's bad attention, is better than no attention. And that's what that proverb is talking about.

Children want to be involved. They want to be involved in the happenings, the events, the flow of their family, because it's their family too. And if they don't feel a deep involved of their family, there's going to be a sense of not belonging. It can even go to the point of a sense of rejection. It generates a sense of isolation, of a loneliness, of loneliness.

And I have known people and worked with people who grew up with no sense of belonging.

Period. And even with a sense of rejection, a sense of isolation, I have worked with some people that have been cursed with that feeling all their lives. Sometimes I talk to somebody who is 60 years old that that has happened to, and they're still wrestling with it. They're still dealing with it. It's still something that has an impact on them. What is more basic and fundamental in a child's life than their family? Think about it. What is more basic and more fundamental in a child's life than their family? And if a child doesn't belong, or feels like he or she doesn't belong, same difference in his family, then they generally don't feel like they belong anywhere. And it's devastating. And one of the great things, the more you can give your child a sense of belonging at home. And you know, we think of this as the front line being the parents. And yes, that's the front line. But they're supporting lines, lines of reinforcement, like aunts and uncles and grandparents and great-grandparents and all of that. They play a role, too. They're not the front line, but they are those reinforcing lines supporting the front line. The more you can give your child a sense of belonging at home, the less power and pull that their peer group is going to have over them with its problems and its dangers. And the more valuable that their home life is, the more power, the more old influence it has over them. Because if it's good at home, they don't want to lose that. They don't want to risk throwing it away. Now again, going back to God. God involves us in His plans and His purposes, His doings, doesn't He? Let's go back to the very beginning, Genesis 2.

In the very beginning, God, in the percentage of the logos, the Word, the One who would become Jesus Christ, Genesis 2, verse 7, in the Lord God formed man of the dust of the ground, breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and then became a living soul, or living being. Jesus Christ, as we know Him now, working on behalf of the Father to bring the first human being into existence. Of course, shortly He would take that man, put him to sleep, take a rib, and create the second human being, Eve, of course, the human mother of all, and Adam, of course, the human physical father of all. But it's interesting, God immediately showed His involvement of His children in His plans, His purposes, His doings. You notice verse 19, "...And out of the ground the Lord God formed every beast of the field, every fowl of the air, brought them to Adam to see what He would call them." God didn't say, Adam, I tell you what, you stand right there. I'm going to make all the animals pass by you, and I'm going to tell you what the name of each one is. He could have done that, but He didn't choose to do it that way. He chose to say, Adam, you name them.

They're my animals. I created them. And they're going to be for your good. But you name them. I want you involved. I want you involved in what they're called. I want you involved in their names. "...Brought them to Adam to see what he would call them." And whatsoever Adam called every living creature, God didn't say, well, Adam, wait a minute. Hold on. That wind, you just call that a lion.

We're not going to call that a lion. We're going to call it whatever. No? Adam?

You know, that big cat with the big mane and all. And it's made without the mane, but there beside it, He said, those are lions. Name them lions. I have to use English, you know. It's the only language I really know.

That was the name thereof.

Verse 8, The Lord God planted a garden eastward in Eden.

You know, the garden was the Garden of God. The Garden of Eden was God's garden. And there He put the man whom He informed. It was God's garden.

Yet, in verse 15, the Lord God took the man and put him into the Garden of Eden to dress it, to keep it, to be involved, to have that as His home, that as His residence, God's garden, to share in it with God, and to have the responsibility to dress it and to keep it.

How many times?

You know, Christ knew when He was clear that one of His jobs, one of His responsibilities was to establish an apostleship and to train specifically the 12th. One failed, one would fail, we know, and would have to be replaced. But the one that replaced Him also had been with Christ, because Christ had more disciples than just the 12th.

But one of the jobs was to spend extra time, additional time, with the 12th. Now, He spent time with all of His disciples.

As you narrow the group down to those that were closer and closer to the inner circle, you might say He spent more time with them, just like He knew He had to train 12 for apostleship.

And so He worked with them more closely than He did the others. But take the 12th. Who did He involve even more than the 12th in general? The three. James and John and Peter. And I do not know at what point God made certain determinations as to life spans and such with those apostles. But James was the first apostolic martyr.

He was martyred first.

And John, his brother, was allowed to live into his 90s, maybe even up to 100 years of age, but certainly to live into the 90s A.D. and die from all records that we have a natural death of old, old age.

And of course, Peter was the most dominant of those original apostles, very dominant in personality and certain leadership traits that really lent themselves well to the others following a lot of his lead. Not that he was the head over them, he wasn't. But he had a dominant personality. But anyhow, constantly involving them, even when he was transfigured in Matthew 17, when he was transfigured before them, and this vision was given, it was those three that were with him to see, envision, Moses and Elijah on either side of him.

Revelation 4, verse 11, tells you something about God, additionally about God. Revelation 4, verse 11. Now, John said that God is love. That's concern in action. He's the being of love. And you find that you take this statement and you apply it to a being that's a being of love.

Revelation 4, verse 11, You are worthy, O Lord, to receive glory and honor and power. For you have created all things, and for your pleasure they are, and were created.

You exercise the laws of creation. You marry your mate.

You know, you marry, like in my case, my wife, Angela. You love each other. You marry because you want to share your lives together. You want to share. It's pleasurable to share your lives together. And then the time comes, you want children. You want to share your lives with them. Because here's something that's intrinsic to a being of love. To whatever degree of being is the being of love, period. A being of love has to share. They have to share.

It's not like, well, I must make myself share. Uh-uh. They can't help but share. That's why God, who is the personification of love, must share. That's one of the reasons He creates. That's one of the reasons He's created thinking independent beings, be they angels or human beings with the wonder potential to someday be in God's very own family.

It's pleasurable to share for a being of love. You've created all things and for your pleasure they are and we're created. Created for involvement. Created for sharing.

You ever notice how our children reach out to know to be a part? And when I say, have you ever noticed? Again, I realize some of us are great grandparents. Some of us are grandparents. Some of us are, you know, a whole bunch of us are parents. Some of us are still raising kids. Some of us have long since raised our children. There are those of us who want yet in the future, plan to have children and all.

Our children reach out to know.

I think the most often question my little grandson, Josiah, has on his mind is, Why? Why? Why? You say, Why? And you try to answer it and then, Why? And you give him the answer to that and, Why? And it's like the Why's never end, it's just, Why? And after a while, you run out of answers.

That's when you get to, well, just because. Just because. Just because.

But anyway, they reach out to know, to be a part, to be involved. It's natural, it's instinctive, it's intrinsic. It's part of the design that God put in us.

Every one of us was a babe and a little child at one time. And we had to be careful not to turn them back. Because again, turning them back too often, not truly communicating with them, not truly involving the time that really needs to be. Well, that has a cumulative effect. It discourages them. It frustrates them. It hurts their emotions and can make them sometimes just kind of throw up their hands and shrug and say, What's the use? And sadly, in our day and age, causes a lot of kids to look elsewhere. And there's a lot of elsewares and they're not good. Those elsewares aren't good. Because it's to their pain and to ours. No, they want to be in the know.

That's natural.

And where you can, you should keep them in the know. One of the things that my wife and I practiced with our children, all three of our kids are very strong analytical thinkers. Very strong analytical thinkers. And one of the things we practiced as they were growing up was that we wouldn't tell them no to something unless there was valid reason to say no. And if there was a valid reason to say no, then there was a way to explain those reasons for saying no. But we always did our best to reach the mind, to reach the thinking.

To help them to see and understand. And of course, obviously, you have to apply age relevance and all of that, depending on what you're talking about. But where you can, you should help them to be in the know. They need communication, and they need to communicate. They need to be taught, and they need to be involved in communication by being communicated with. It's interesting how, through the generations, even in this country, how things change from one generation to another, sometimes in certain ways. And sometimes, some of the things that were really good in a generation are lost in the next.

And sometimes, something that's in one generation that really is not good, it's abandoned in the next, and that is good that it's abandoned. But I've heard the saying, I heard it when I was a young person, it wasn't something that my parents taught or operated by.

But this was the saying that, I don't know how many years it's been around, probably a long, long time, but children should be seen and not heard. You've probably heard that too. That's not a healthy statement. Children should be seen and not heard. That's not godly. What if God took that approach with us? I just want to see you, but I don't want to hear from you.

I don't want to hear from you.

Keep your mouth shut. You've got questions, don't ask them. You've got concerns, don't express them.

You've got worries, bottle them up. Bottle neck them. Keep them to yourself.

You're my children. I just want to see you, but I don't want to hear you.

God obviously wouldn't do that because it's not godly.

No, that is harmful.

Where that has been the rule in a home, and I've seen it again, by living into my 70s and seeing the cycles of things, how they kick off and how they run and how they work, in homes where that's been the rule, I've seen a lot of broken children. And again, sad. No, God communicates with His children. He puts them in the know. And again, it has to be time and age relevant to a degree. Yes, you have to use wisdom. But God communicates with His children. He puts them in the know. Notice with me in Genesis 18 and verse 17.

Genesis 18.

Now, this is where God appears to Abraham.

And of course, the promised of a sign.

And then, God's going to be leaving.

The man rose up. Genesis 18 verse 16. They rose up from thence. They looked toward Sodom. Abraham went with them to bring them on the way. He walked along with them a little ways.

And the Lord, notice verse 17.

This is the one that would come as Jesus Christ later. And the Lord said, shall I hide from Abraham that thing which I do?

Do I just keep it to myself?

Seeing that Abraham shall become a great and mighty nation, and all the nations of the earth shall be blessed in him. Shall I just keep this to myself, or shall I share it? Well, we know what God did. He shared what he was going to do. He communicated with Abraham. He put Abraham in the know. John 15, 15.

Christ knowing that it was his last night to be a living flesh and blood human being, having come from God and become flesh, and that before the next sunset, he would be in the tomb, and he had come out of there as a resurrected, immortal being, who was able to manifest himself, but would not be mortal and susceptible to temptation and sin and all of that. He would be totally beyond that. And so he's sharing with the disciples. And notice John 15, 15. He says, "...henceforth I call you not servants, for the servant doesn't know what his Lord is doing, but I have called you friends, for all things that I have heard of my Father, I have made known to you." I've communicated them to you.

Notice 1 Corinthians 2.10. We may not, in one sense, think of this in light of God communicating with us, but what else is it?

1 Corinthians 2.10.

As far as God communicating with us, what else is it, if that's not what this is? Where Paul said in 1 Corinthians 2.10, "...but God has revealed them unto us by His Spirit, for the Spirit which comes from God the Father through Jesus Christ, as well as Christ through the Holy Spirit also supplies, but the Spirit of God, for the Spirit, the Holy Spirit, searches all things." Yes, the deep things of God.

God's ability to communicate with you and me to greater and greater depths of knowledge and understanding is because of His Spirit and Him communicating with us and giving us the capacity. It's a communication affair.

Back in John 16, verse 13, John 16, and verse 13, God's Spirit that will search out even the deep things of God, Christ tells them of that Spirit which searches out the deep things of God. He says in John 16, verse 13, and I'll read it according to the way it ought to be, how it is when it, the Spirit of truth, has come, it will guide you into all truth. For it shall not speak of itself, but whatsoever it shall hear, that shall it speak, and it will show you things to come. That is a communication matter. That's God communicating with us through His Spirit. Again, you have to take into account age, maturity, timing, balance.

But reach out to your kids.

Humble yourself with TLC, tender, loving, care. Bring them into the family unit. Involve, communicate, love. And in this life, in a world where so many people are reduced to survival, just struggling from can to can't, as has been the mode of life for untold billions, just trying to make ends meet and not starve to death, too many times both mom and dad are so tied up and don't have the time, and the children, child labor, child factory workers, child slaves. I mean, it's just the way this world is, is so far from the way the world tomorrow will be. But as one person said, don't be the 32nd dad. Don't just come in and give 37 seconds of time to your child and be gone. I remember that poignant song by Reba MacIntyre about her father, the man she never knew.

He came in to sleep and then was gone again because he had to work all the time, and she never really knew him. And it was a very poignant song that she did. Now, whether that was a real-life example or just somebody she was aware of, the song says so much. It's like one kid said, dad doesn't really live here. He just pops in once in a while, and that's usually to sleep. So, no, we don't want to be like that. Our father makes himself accessible to his children. Think about God. He doesn't say, here are the periods of time that you can call on me. You can't call on me on any time except these periods of time. No, we know that we can call on God day or night, any time of the day or night. You can wake up in the wee hours of the morning. It can be 3 o'clock in the morning, and it's so quiet that you could hear a mouse walking across the floor. And if you want to pray to God right then about something, you can. He'll hear you.

If you're in big city traffic like Atlanta, and it's a parking lot, and you want to express some thoughts and concerns to God, share them with Him. Seek Him.

God doesn't say, I don't hear you right now because there's too much traffic noise, too many honkins or horns or whatever. Our Father makes Himself accessible to us as children. He doesn't cut Himself off from us. He doesn't go off to Himself. 1 Peter 3, verse 12.

For the eyes of the Lord are over the righteous. And it's not just He sees us.

And His ears are open to our prayers.

To the righteous, to those seeking Him.

His eyes, His ears are open to us.

This cut-off, this inaccessibility is one of the reasons why God hates divorce. The inaccessibility, the cut-off, the loss is one of the reasons why God hates divorce. Number 3.

Number 3.

Clothe your manner of dealing with them in the mantle of gentleness.

Clothe your manner of dealing with them in the mantle of gentleness.

In Psalm 18, verse 35.

Psalm 18, verse 35.

David was a powerful king. He was a powerful individual. He was a mighty king. And he was a mighty warrior.

And he is known for various greatnesses.

But notice what he says in Psalm 18.

In verse 35, he says this, "'You have also given me the shield of your salvation, and your right hand has held me up, and your gentleness has made me great.'" God, your gentleness has made me great.

It can be rendered in the Hebrew this way, with your meekness you have multiplied me. With your meekness, your gentleness, your meekness.

And I'm not going over there, but that is also repeated regarding King David in 2 Samuel 22, verse 36. In 2 Samuel 22, verse 36, it's repeated. Again, for emphasis, Isaiah 40, verses 9-11.

"'O Zion, that brings good tidings, get you up into the high mountain, O Jerusalem, that brings good tidings. Lift up your voice with strength, lift it up, be not afraid. Say to the cities of Judah, Behold your God.' Verse 10 of Isaiah 40, "'Behold, the Lord God will come with strong hand, strong hand, and His arms shall rule for Him.'" Strong hand or strong arm. "'Behold, His reward is with Him, and His work before Him.'" Notice verse 11, "'He shall feed His flock like a shepherd.

He shall gather the lambs with His arm and carry them in His bosom, and shall gently lead those that are with Yom.'" Gently lead.

2 Corinthians 10.1.

2 Corinthians 10.

And verse 1. 1 Corinthians 10.1. Paul, writing them this second and final letter.

Now, I, Paul, myself, beseech you by what?

By the meekness and gentleness of Christ, who in presence am based among you, but being absent and bow toward you, by the meekness and gentleness of Christ. Look at Galatians 5.22.

We have looked at this so many times over the years.

Galatians 5.22. And think about this. I'll read these fruits first. But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, long suffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness, temperance. Against such, there's no law. That generates a soft touch.

It's not harsh.

It's not hard. It's a soft touch.

James 3.17. James 3 and verse 17.

The apostle James, half-sibling to Christ, said this in James 3.17, But the wisdom that is from above, the wisdom that we seek, that we want to have, to have a hand in, a part of, to be part of us, to be in us, that is from above is first pure, then peaceable.

Notice, gentle.

Easy to be entreated.

Easy to be entreated.

Full of mercy and good fruits without partiality, without hypocrisy. Easy to be entreated. God is very approachable.

I think of the analogy, a man's strong hand.

A strong grip.

Some people, some men, have a grip that is so strong, it's like a grip of steel. It's like a steel hand. You know, I have always said to some man, you're not in a hand-squeezing contest. You're shaking hands. You're not in a hand-squeezing contest.

But a steel hand. But most guys will have a pretty strong grip. But a steel hand and a glove of velvet.

You know, you think about a steel hand. God is very approachable. And He has what you might say, a steel hand in a glove of velvet.

The velvet glove does nothing to take away strength.

But it adds a nice soft touch.

Puts a soft touch to it. You know, I've asked myself over the years, and I've wondered, did God possibly appear weak to Lucifer?

Think about it for a moment. God is so gentle and easygoing and easily accessible.

God may have appeared weak to Lucifer because He was so easy to be around. He was fun to be around. He was easy to be around. He was pleasant to be in His presence. But He had power that Satan didn't even begin to imagine until it had to be leveled against Him and corrective wrath. Here in James 2, verse 19, where James says, you believe there's one God? You do well.

The demons also believe and tremble.

God had power.

He has power. But He doesn't go around booming all the time, does He?

How many times in regards to that statement have we thought about and gone to maybe where I'll go right now? 1 Kings 19.

1 Kings 19.

This is an account where Jezebel sent word to Elijah.

By this time tomorrow, you're going to be like my dead prophets that you killed.

And Elijah fled for his life.

And he was fed a couple of times supernaturally by God through critters, birds.

Now, this was not where he was fed by the birds.

This is where he was given two meals. And he was going to go on the strength of those two meals 40 days and nights. But he went to this cave. He went to this place. He went to Mount Horeb. He wound up going there to the Mount of God. And he shows up and it's like, Elijah, what are you doing here? And, you know, he has his answer. And again, God is very easily entreated. And God's very merciful. And God's very gentle. And there's a mighty wind that blows by and causes rocks to roll and crash and all. But God's not in the wind. And then there's an earthquake. Really rattles things. And God's not in the earthquake. And then there's a fire. But God's not in the fire.

And then verse 12, And after the earthquake of fire, but the Lord was not in the fire. Verse 12, Kings 19, verse 12. And after the fire, a still, small voice.

Gentle and quiet. And if you read the rest of the account, he's in the process of correcting Elijah. There's a certain measure of correction that's going on, but it's a still, quiet voice.

You know, in all situations that contain potentially explosive issues or situations, in all situations where you're helping form another human being, their life, calm, cool heads must always be exercised.

There's a time for thunder. But even then, it must be properly controlled and utilized. Notice again one of those cues in Jeremiah 30, verse 11. Jeremiah 30 and verse 11.

It's a cue that is sandwiched into this verse.

So, Jeremiah 30, verse 11, For I am with you, says the Lord, to save you. Though I make a full land of all nations, where I have scattered you, yet, will I not make a full land of you? Notice this principle, this equation, this however you want to word it, but I will correct you in measure.

In other words, I will not correct you out of measure. I will correct you in measure.

The punishment will fit the crime. I won't be excremed. I won't overdo. I will correct you in measure. Aren't we so glad that our loving Father corrects us in measure when we need correction?

Jeremiah 10, verse 24.

Jeremiah draws it down very personally to himself.

In Jeremiah 10 and verse 24, he says this, He says, O Lord, correct me, but with judgment.

In balance, according to measure, lest You bring me to nothing, not in Your anger, lest You bring me to nothing. O Lord, correct me, please, in judgment, with judgment.

In balance, which also is a type of mercy.

When things are done, calmly and cruelly and in balance, and properly, that itself is a type of mercy or gentleness. Calm, cool heads are needed in the most crucial times, and being a parent, helping form new lives, is one of the most crucial, important times you'll experience in this life. So I would ask this question, because this question is not just for this life. This question is for the life to come, and in the jobs, not just of this life, but the jobs that are going to be laid upon us in the world tomorrow as with this Christ. What's living under your leadership as parents like? What was it like? What is it like? What's living under our leadership as parents like? That's very important to God. That's extremely important to God. Is He going to put one city under us? Two cities? Five cities? Ten cities? Or nine?

What could it be like if we took our cues from God? If we really took our cues from God and exercised according to the way God does it for the sake of children, for the sake of our future, for the sake of our happiness in the meantime. Again, so important to take our cues from God the Father. Number 4.

Unconditional love. You hear that word a lot. Unconditional love versus conditional loving.

Unconditional love, which is God's way, versus the human way of conditional loving. Conditional loving is like saying, okay, I love you when you obey me on my terms. I love you when you obey me. I love you when you obey me on my terms. I love you when.

But the corollary is, I don't love you when you don't do it the way I want you. I don't love you.

Too many times, husbands and wives, we see it all around us in society, mothers, fathers, they practice this, and it's more than just frustrating. It's demoralizing. It's discouraging. It depresses. See, conditional loving results in throwing both the sin and the sinner out, rejecting both. We've got the saying we've always heard. I've heard it all my life. Throwing the baby out with the bathwater.

Throwing the baby out with the bathwater. Now, it's very important to understand and explain that actions affect relationships.

But that doesn't keep us from loving and genuinely caring. You know, sadly, I have had to talk with people sometimes in counsel to where they have been cut to the depth of their fiber for a child that they deeply love.

They've never quit loving, but they can't have a relationship with them. Because of what's involved, there's no relationship. Because see, love is unconditional. There's nothing my three children could ever do to make me quit loving them.

My love is unconditional, but relationships aren't. They're conditional. It takes two. It takes two to relate.

But love can be unconditional and should be. Proverbs 17, 17 says this, and this is talking about unconditional love, Proverbs 17, 17, A friend loves at all times.

A true friend loves at all times because their love is not conditional.

And this goes on to say, our brother is born for adversity.

A friend loves at all times. How much more apparent? Children will not come to you if they think you despise them or don't truly love them. Conditional loving cuts off the parent-child relationship in regards to communication. Communication lines go down.

Because you want to talk with someone you want to spend time with and talk with somebody and communicate with someone who loves you, who cares for you.

Who doesn't look down on you or demean you.

See, it takes unconditional love to keep communication lines open or to even keep the possibility there that they will stay open. And again, we don't misunderstand.

It doesn't depend on what the other person does, whether you love them or not. That's what unconditional love is about. You can totally disagree with what they're doing, but you still love them. You never quit loving them. Your love for them is not conditional as to what they do. The relationship may be. The relationship may be.

You know, I don't know all the details, but Jeffrey Dahmer, I would dare say his parents loved him probably to the day he died, but I also dare say that there was no relationship that they could have with him. He's the case for the last great day. No, unconditional love is just that. You don't put conditions on it. You love.

But that again is different from the relationship.

But it takes unconditional love to keep the possibilities there if a relationship that is dead because of the other decides they want to initiate a relationship, but they know and are convinced that you love them.

How many people have turned and started walking away from God and started killing their relationship? But at some point, due to God trying to stimulate them to return, and due to them coming to certain realizations, they came to their senses and they turned around. And all during that time, God didn't quit loving them. The relationship may have obviously been limited and could get to a point where it would be a dead relationship in time, but He didn't quit loving them. Your children will not keep coming to you as they get older if you love conditionally. They will turn more and more to the peer group for acceptance because unconditional love hasn't been shown.

Remember the Scripture? Romans 5 and verse 8. Romans 5 verse 8. While we were yet sinners, God intervened for us. While we were yet sinners. And remember that famous one, John 3.16. John 3.16. For God so loved the world. That's why there's a Savior. That's why God the Son, the Logos the Word, became flesh to die.

Conditional love is a type of bribery. It's a type of extortion. If you want me to love you, if you want my love, you better do this.

Well, if they're being asked to do something that needs to be done, they should be doing it on the basis of the validity of what they're being asked to be done. Not as some kind of a bargaining thing for the love. If you want me to love you, if you want my love, you better do this. It's like if you don't do enough, I don't love you. Why is it sometimes that people first-roots children of God feel that I'm not love-worthy?

How can God love me?

And they almost get into, a lot of times, legalistic do's and don'ts. If I can just do enough, God will love me. He'll love me. If I can just do enough. If I can just do enough, things right. God will love me. And they try to earn His love in that sense. And a lot of times, it's because that's the kind of framework they grew up in.

Because that kind of framework does backfire.

It's not love, it's a trade-off. And final point, filth one.

Treating with respect.

Just simply treating with respect.

I find that, you know, it's a human thing. It's coming to humans because it's a human thing. But how we tend to treat strangers and friends with more respect and honor and worth and dignity many times than our own families. Because a lot of times, our own families, we take them for granted. You know, they're there. They're going to be there.

They can't get away from me.

We're stuck with each other.

We know each other.

And they don't see the need to really put respect in their dealings with each other. You know, it's sad.

I've seen some parents as they got older, they just got more and more set in their ways. I'm talking about when they were grandparents and great-grands. And I've seen some kids that...

One of the saddest things is to see so many times the elderly treated so shabbily by their kids and their grandkids, by their own children, and their grandkids. And if you could just go back and take things back 50 years, 60 years, 70 years, whatever it is, and come forward, you'd say, well, this is just a consequence of all the causative factors along the way that have produced this. It's so important, again, to treat with respect, to value, to love, to assign worth and value by the way that you deal. And our example with them really reinforces value and worth. Daddy, can you come here? No, I'm too busy. Well, Daddy, I really need you to come here, please. What you're doing can't be that important. What I am is. So, Daddy, I would really like you to come here. No, you just figure it out.

I can't do that right now. And there are obviously times when you can't turn loose with something. I know that. Daddy, can you please come here? Yeah, I'll be there in just a minute. Let me just... Yeah. Or maybe before you can just stop and you go. Now, if you said to the son, Johnny, come here. Daddy, I can't come right now. I went a little bit. No, I want you here right now. Well, Daddy, I don't really want to come right now.

I'd really like to finish doing what I'm doing. Well, that's okay. That's not important. You come here right now. You trade it one way and it has the one-way fruits. And again, with balance, with maturity, and off. Let me run through those again, just in brief. Number one, loving your children first. You first love them.

Number two, involving your children, involving them. It's their family too.

Number three, clothing your manner of dealing with them and the mantle of gentleness. A hand of steel and a velvet glove. Number four, loving them unconditionally. They don't have to earn your love. They have it automatically.

And number five, trading with respect, reinforcing their value and worth to you. When we apply these simple, basic foundational principles, we are taking our cues as a parent from the Supreme Parent, and we will meet with rich and sweet success.