Dealing With Difficult People

The last time I spoke here, I spoke about being a peacemaker. About maintaining good relationships was like maintaining a dam and patching the cracks in the dam before the water breaks. Because once the relationship breaks, there is no repairing it. Everything in its path gets destroyed. And we talked about starting with humility. You're putting the needs of other people first. We're going to get a bigger definition of humility today. And then we talked about being gentle. We talked about women learning to be gentle and quiet, and there's beauty and strength in that. And then we talked to the men. We talked about not being judgmental and condemning, but believing in your family and the people you relate with. We talked about gentlemen not raising your voice, and that's also valuable for the women as well. Men tend to scowl quite a bit. We talked about the scowl, not always looking down on others. And we talked about you don't have to be right all the time. Other people can be right. Be gentle. And we spoke about remembering that words are our biggest tool in our relationship toolbox. To avoid gossip and above all, be gentle. Now normally, if you do those things that we spoke about in the last sermon, you'll get along with people. But there are some people you just can't get along with. And I told you I was going to talk about this next time. How do you deal with those people we would label difficult people? What does the Bible say about it? Oh, there's all kinds of self-help books out there on how to deal with difficult people. But the world is full of individuals who make life difficult for others. You know, some of us have bosses who are over demanding. Others have relatives who will just never leave us alone. Never give us a moment's peace. So, in this sermon, I'm going to follow up on the last sermon of being a peacemaker and answer the question, How does God expect us to deal with difficult people? The Bible absolutely admits that there are difficult people. There's no such thing as, oh, just be nice to everybody and everybody will be nice to you. That's not in the Bible at all. From the Old Testament to the New Testament, it talks about dealing with difficult people. And there are some very clear instructions on how we are to deal with them. And it is not enough to paint this with a broad brush and just say, well, if you're a Christian, you need to be nice. That is absolutely not the case. There are some very clear rules in place on how to deal with people that make life difficult. What is the key ingredient, the starting point, the foundation that we need to deal with difficult people? Believe it or not, it's the same key that you start with in dealing with anybody. It's the same exact key as we started with in the last sermon on being a peacemaker. James chapter 3 verse 16. We use a different scripture, but we're going to come to the same conclusion. James chapter 3 verse 16.

So the over-writing principle, the starting point of dealing with difficult people, is the same as dealing with anyone. It's humility. It's putting the needs of other people before your own, including the needs of the difficult person. We're going to talk about, at the end of the sermon, some very specific things that we're supposed to do when people are difficult in a specific way. Like if they're always angry, or if they always like to debate and argue, or if they always have to be right. There are certain things that we do with those kinds of people that are different than you would with a normal person. But the starting point is actually the same. Our outlook and our point of view is, how can I help you, difficult person? Not, how can I judge you, condemn you, not be one with you? You start by putting their needs first. So let's talk about, let's jump right in. How do you deal with a person who's always right? Alright, this person is never wrong. You tell them that they made a mistake, and oh no they didn't. You misunderstood. You just don't know. They know. You're wrong. They're not wrong. This person is always right. How do you deal with that person? Why are you all looking at me? How do you deal with that? By the way, when I gave the Peacemaker sermon, most of you came up to me and said, I know you were talking about me. No, I don't think you all are difficult people. I just want to establish a premise in this sermon so I don't make the same mistake as I made last time. As you thought, I was talking about you individually, and I was signaling you out. I was not. Okay, so I don't think you all are difficult people. I just want to give us some help from the Bible of how to deal with difficult people. If you are a difficult person, then take a lesson from this too. Some people say, you know, was that sermon for me? Yeah! Was I talking to you? Yes, it's for us, but I'm not singling any of us out. Okay, so just FYI. All right, how do you deal with that person who's always right? Your opinion never matters to them. How do you deal with a person like that? Matthew, Chapter 5, the last sermon we started in the Sermon on the Mount. We're going to go back there. Matthew, Chapter 5, verse 41.

Tammy and I love the Austin congregation. We don't think you're difficult at all. We do want you to have the tools to deal with difficult people, however. Matthew, Chapter 5, verse 41. And whoever compels you to go one mile, go with him two.

What? Are you kidding me? Is that where we have to start? Really? Yes. That is where we start with dealing with somebody who's always right.

A companion scripture to that principle, the Apostle Paul picks it up in Philippians, Chapter 2, verses 3 and 4. Philippians, Chapter 2, verses 3 and 4. Don't worry. At the end of this sermon, you will not be a doormat. You will not be somebody that people can just wipe their feet on. There are some very good principles on how to deal with difficult people. This is the foundation, the starting point. Philippians, Chapter 2, verse 3.

Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit. But in lowliness of mind, there's that humility again. Let each esteem others better than himself. Let each one of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others.

Notice in verse 3, that... go back to verse 3, if you would. It says, let nothing. What part of anything is not included in nothing? Nothing! Which means, even when we're dealing with that guy or gal who's always right, don't put your self-interest, your need to be right, above theirs. Don't put yourself first.

Jesus Christ told us to go the extra mile with someone if that's what it takes to make peace. That's not weakness. It's not weakness to yield to somebody else. It doesn't make you a doormat. It actually shows wisdom, a kind of maturity that goes above and beyond common human sense. This is God's sense. In Genesis, Chapter 6, a Brahm, who later was called Abraham, and Lot's herdsmen were having a dispute over which pastor the sheep could graze in.

Abraham wisely let Lot choose the best land. Abraham chose peace. Now, Abraham was the mightier of the two. He literally had a small army, and he was incredibly wealthy. Lot was a wealthy man, but nowhere near what Abraham was. Lot was just the tagalong. Lot was sharing the protection of his uncle Abraham. But Abraham could have had any land he wanted and told Lot to take, but instead, Abram valued peace over possessions, over being right, over the need to fulfill himself.

Look what happened between Abram and Lot. God saw that Abram chose peace over possession, and God blessed Abram with descendants that you cannot number, as the sands of the sea, as the stars of heaven, as it says in the Bible. What did Lot get? Well, he became an okay guy, too, but he had a really rocky start, and two peoples came from Lot, and they did not fare very well in the Old Testament at all.

Although, Ruth did come from Lot's line, and she is in the ancestry of Jesus Christ, so it's not that nothing came from Lot. Some did, some good came from him. But great things came from Abraham, and he chose peace over possession. So how do you deal with the person who is always right? Put him first, go the extra mile, be humble.

That's the starting point when we're going to deal with any of these categories of difficult people that are in the Bible. But there's another kind of person. There's a person who's always out to get you. This is a more dangerous kind of person. The person who's always right is annoying. It would drive you crazy if you let them. This next category, the person who's always out to get you, there's actually great danger in dealing with this kind of person.

So there are rules in the Bible of how to deal with this particular kind of difficult person. What does God say? Well, protect yourself. Luke 12, verse 58. How do you protect yourself? Luke 12, verse 58. How do you protect yourself? Wisely. When you go with your adversary, what's an adversary? Someone who's always out to get you. When you go with your adversary to the magistrate, okay, they're taking you to the boss, or they're taking you to court, or they're going to turn you in, and some consequence could happen if someone makes a decision against you.

What do you do? You make every effort along the way to settle with him. Again, a yielding spirit. Again, the willingness to take wrong, to be wronged, just to settle a matter. I'll tell you a story. I didn't tell this to San Antonio.

Maybe I probably told you the story before, but it's applicable. I'll tell you again. I was a young man. This was before I was married. I was dating Tammy. Tammy had a rugged stepfather, a Vietnam vet, machine gun crew in Vietnam. Very, very rough. Rough go of it. Two sons. They were a little rough around the edges, too. And they liked to play hard. Arnold Schwarzenegger movies. Chili as hot as you could possibly make it. That kind of guy.

And one day, I'm driving in the parking lot, and I had this old... I think it was a Dodge Dart. You know those cars that used to make them out of steel? You could kick them and break your toe, that kind of car? That's what I had. And so they decided it would be a good idea to jump on the hood of my car while I drove around the parking lot.

So I drove slowly, and I entertained my future in-laws. I let them ride on the hood of my car. And a young child ran out of the church building, away from his parents, right in front of my car. And I, of course, hit the brakes. I wasn't going that fast. And my in-laws went tumbling into the parking lot. Boom! Well, the parents of that... You know, it was fine. Everything was fine. I saw the child coming from a long distance away.

I stopped him plenty of time. I thought it wasn't even a matter. It wasn't even an incident. So, my in-laws brushed themselves off. The parents got the child. I waited for everybody to get out of my way, and I parked my car. Well, the parents were highly offended that I did not get out and apologize for almost killing their child. Oh, they were offended? Oh! And I thought to myself, I'm offended that you let your child go and run in front of my car.

And then I thought to myself, self? That's not what the Bible says, is it? So, I went to them. They were offended. And this was going to cause a problem in the congregation. So, I settled it with them before it went anywhere.

And I apologized to them for allowing that carelessness to go on. I was just as at fault. I was. Was I driving my car or was somebody else driving it? No, I was doing it. I was doing the idiotic thing of allowing my ruffian in-laws to ride on the hood of my solid steel car. So, I was just as at fault.

And I went to them and I apologized to them. And I didn't expect them to apologize back. They were offended. So, we settled the matter quickly. And it was over, just like that. So, it says, when you go to your adversary to the magistrate, make every effort along the way to settle with him, lest he drag you to the judge, the judge deliver you to the officer, and the officer throw you in prison. Settle things quickly with those people who are out to get you. You know what? And it's not wrong to tell them that they have done wrong also. It is a good idea to listen to their complaint first and solve it, completely solve it, then go back and try to solve yours.

But it is not wrong to tell that difficult person that they have done something wrong. You might just find that you are the only person on the planet who gets along with that person in the end. Everybody else thinks, oh, that's a difficult person, you can't deal with them.

And yet you, the peacemaker, are actually the one who can get along with that very difficult person. Because you've started with humility, and you choose peace over possession, and you solve things quickly. But it is not wrong to take a matter to the Matthew 18 and verse 15.

Now, we're not going to read the entire Matthew 18 process here. There's an entire process of how to deal with a brother who sins against you. I just want to pull the principle out of verse 15. Moreover, if a brother, Matthew 18, 15, if a brother sins against you, the difficult person, go and tell him his fault between you and him alone. If he hears you, you have gained a brother. One-on-one is the best approach. We don't want to do that, especially with a difficult person. There's major risk involved. They will say they will lie and say you didn't offer peace. You know, you're making yourself very vulnerable when you go one-on-one with somebody.

But giving yourself that amount of vulnerability, don't worry about it. God's got your back. You make sure you guard his name. Because the name of God is on you. You show that difficult person the respect to take a matter to them one-on-one privately. You might just gain a friend or a brother that nobody else can get along with. And what a feather in your cap that would be. It's like a dam that's leaking.

You solve the problem early. It's both in your best interest and in their best interest. So be wise about conflict, not defensive. Put a matter to rest quickly, or the penalty gets severe. I would just like to add to that. Restrain yourself from getting even. Easier said than done. Easy to say in a sermon. Hard to apply in life. We've got to do it, brethren. Restrain ourselves from getting them back. Romans 12, verses 17-21. You know, it takes two people to tango. It takes two people to get into a fight.

With difficult people, it's just easier. Just much easier to slip into that conflict. But if you're the peacemaker, you might just resolve the matter. And if you don't resolve the matter, at least you will be clean from the matter.

And the other person will pay the price. But if you get even with them, even if they deserve it, you'll sling mud on yourself and you'll drag the name of God with you. And it will corrupt you. The conflict itself will corrupt you. And that's the danger that Paul warns about. Romans 12, verse 17. Repay no one evil for evil. This is where the saying, two wrongs don't make a right, comes from. Two wrongs don't make a right.

Repay no one evil for evil. Have regard for good things in the sight of all men. In the difficult ones. Verse 18. If it is possible... Now that's an important little statement. It means it's not always possible. It means there are difficult people out there. This is Paul absolutely admitting that there are some people you just can't get along with. That's not being judgmental or harsh.

That's just saying it like it is. If it's possible, as much as depends on you, live peaceably with all men. Beloved, do not avenge yourselves. Why? Let's get into that. Why don't you avenge yourself? Well, two reasons. One, God owns it. God owns revenge. What's the second reason? First reason we don't avenge ourselves is because vengeance belongs to God. What's the second reason in the main point Paul's driving at? Beloved, do not avenge yourselves, but rather give place to wrath.

For it is written, vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord. Therefore, if your enemy is hungry, feed him. If he's thirsty, give him a drink. For in doing so, you will heat coals of fire on his head. That's the first reason you don't take vengeance. It belongs to God. Reason number two is in verse 21. Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.

It's about being overcome, being overtaken. You cannot put your hands in fire and not be burned. You cannot get into a conflict with difficult people and not become a difficult person. We'll get into a little bit more of that at the end of the sermon. You cannot! That's why you keep your hands clean from it, so that you don't become overcome. It will take you. You will become the angry person. So just let it go. That's not weak. That's wise.

Deuteronomy 32, verse 35. This is the original statement. Notice, let's get the context, right? So Paul was referring to it. This is what will happen to us, and this is what Paul was referring to. This is the overcoming Paul is talking about. It's no light thing. Deuteronomy 32, 35. Vengeance is mine and recompense. In other words, I will repay. Their foot shall slip in due time, for the day of calamity is at hand, and the things to come hasten upon them.

You know what that means? Hasten upon them? It means happen too quickly for them to deal with. And if you're holding on to them, if you're locked into conflict with them, when calamity hastens upon them, guess what happens to you? Calamity hastens upon you.

So this is the context of what Paul was referring to in Romans chapter 12. In Deuteronomy chapter 32, it tells us, you lock yourself into battle with a difficult person, your calamity will come too quickly for you to deal with.

So are there things that you can do to stay out of trouble with these difficult people? You know what? There are. There is. There's some wisdom given in the Proverbs in dealing with difficult people. And it's not what you would typically expect a Christian to be instructed to do.

But did you know that if you just cannot get along with a particular person who's constantly angry, constantly fighting, did you know it's okay to avoid them? To stay away from them? Well, it is! Proverbs chapter 22 and verse 3. Proverbs 22 and verse 3. A prudent man foresees evil and hides himself. Avoid the conflict. Right? But the simple pass on and are punished. Simple people will just continue to walk into the fire over and over and over again like a moth to a flame. Just walk right into the fire, constantly. That's why if you're young and before you marry someone, make sure that they are of a gentle spirit. Make sure that they're not a fighter. And don't you be a fighter either. But gentle yourself. Calm yourself. If you find that you're someone who blows up all the time, learn to be quiet, boy or girl.

And if you're a young lady and you notice that a man is treating... Since men are hierarchical, let me just step out of the sermon and give a little advice to the youngers. Men are hierarchical. In other words, we rank everything. Everything has a rank. A young man walks in and an older man stands up with gray hair. That young man automatically thinks he's over me. We just think that way. Women think relationally. How do we relate? Men think, how do we rank? Right? So use that to your advantage, ladies, and understand it. If a young man treats his mother badly, who supposedly is above him, but he mouths soft to her, and he's disrespectful to her, how do you think he's going to treat you? Disrespectfully. You are not going to be above his mother in his mind. Especially not at first. So if he does that, or another wise man said, watch how they treat animals. If they treat animals harshly, and animals are below them, and if they view you below them, which they shouldn't, but they will, they're going to treat you harshly. If they treat an animal okay, then it's likely they'll treat you okay. Don't jump into a relationship with someone who's a fighter, who mistreats other people. Be careful. A prudent man foresees evil and hides himself. Now there's a lot of conflict between husbands and wives. Don't hide yourself from your spouse. Usually, so 90% of marital conflict is not because you're dealing with a difficult person. Now it can be. You may be unfortunate marriage to a difficult person. But most marriages have difficulties. And not everybody is a difficult person. Most conflict comes from miscommunication. Don't understand each other. And marriages will literally fall apart because the wife doesn't understand the husband. The husband doesn't understand the wife. She's talking pink. He hears blue. He talks blue. She hears pink. They just completely miss each other. We could say the same things and mean something completely different. I'll explain this more in a marriage-type sermon. But don't avoid your spouse with this proverb. This is where you are avoiding conflict with someone who's always out to get you. But husbands and wives can say the same thing and mean something completely different. And this is in everything we talk. Everything we say. We mean something completely different. When she says, I have nothing to wear, you open the closet, the closet's full. She can't even fix anything else in that closet. She has a whole closet full of nothing to wear. And the husband doesn't understand. She means I don't have anything new to wear. Where the girl would hear, and her girlfriends would immediately hear that and go, oh honey, we're going to go shopping next week.

When a guy says I have nothing to wear, he means, oh, his clothes are dirty. And he hasn't done laundry yet. He's out of underwear. That's what he means. So I don't need to take a shower, honey. That's what a guy means. We're saying the same exact thing, and we mean something completely different. And all of life is that way. That doesn't make a person a difficult person. That just means you misunderstand each other. These are people who are out to get you constantly. They're constantly trying to hurt you, undermine you. Avoid them. Don't have something else to do. It's okay. You know, hey, you want to go get a bite to eat? You know, you have a life. You have things to do. You can make something up on the fly, and it'd be legitimate. No! I have to go iron my own wedding dress. You don't even have to tell them what you're doing. You've got something else to do. Avoid them.

Proverbs 17, verse 27. Proverbs 17 will read verses 27 and 28. He who has knowledge spares his words, and a man of understanding is of calm spirit. Even a fool is counted wise when he holds his peace. When he shuts his lips, he is considered perceptive. You know, engaging into a debate with a difficult person is fruitless. It will benefit you nothing to debate those people. So don't fight back.

How are we doing on time? Pretty good. Yeah, we're fine. Okay. Let me just double check my notes here.

Okay. What about the person who always argues? You know not to fight back. Go back to the Sermon on the Mount and read that. I'll skip that part. Let's go to the person that constantly likes to debate with you. What do you do? I want to go through a proverb that a lot of people have a lot of different takes on. And I'm just going to give you my take on it. Okay? Because I love Hebrew poetry. I love the fact that the Hebrew language is mostly poetry. And it rhymes. They have this rhyme going on in Hebrew. But it's not a rhyme of words or sounds. Like hickory dickory dock. The mouse ran up the clock. And we have the meter and rhyme to it. That's English. That's the way we rhyme. But in Hebrew, they rhyme in meaning. Alright? So if the meaning rhymes to them, that's cool poetry. Right? So, in Proverbs chapter 26 verses 4 and 5, this often times tends to be difficult to understand because it sounds like a contradiction. But it's not a contradiction. It's a play on words. It's a rhyme.

Proverbs chapter 26 verses 4 and 5. Well, which one is it? Do you answer? Don't you answer! Well, that's not what it's saying at all. To me, the less you be wise or less you be like him or less you be wise in his own eyes gives us the clue as to what it means. Do not answer a fool according to his folly, lest you also be like him. In other words, don't answer foolishly. If someone is constantly debating with you and raising their voice, don't get back in their face and raise your voice, lest you be counted a fool also. Don't answer them like a fool. So how do you answer them? The next verse. Answer a fool according to his folly. Well, that's the same thing. It's not the same thing. In other words, answer the folly. And only answer the folly. Only answer the foolishness. Don't answer according to the folly. In other words, like him, if he's being an idiot, don't you be an idiot too. But go ahead and give him an answer to show that God is wise and he is not. Because what the fool is doing is not only making you seem like you are unwise, knowing that you're a member of the house of God, they're making God seem like he is unwise. So in that situation, when someone is always arguing with you, the fool constantly opens his mouth and argues. Don't answer him foolishly, lest you be like him. But answer the foolishness, lest he be wise in his own eyes. Notice a great example that Jesus Christ himself gave. He was constantly harangued by the Pharisees and the Sadducees. They were foolish. They were arguing against God in the flesh, Emmanuel, the King of Kings and Lord of Lords. And yet they thought themselves wiser than him, that they could trick him and catch him. And they were constantly doing this. And notice how he followed this proverb. He didn't answer according to their foolishness, but he did answer their foolishness. Mark 12, verse 18. Jesus Christ is an excellent example of Proverbs 26, verses 4 and 5. An example that gives us a clear way to follow. Mark 12, verse 18. Then some Sadducees, who say that there is no resurrection, came to him and they asked him, saying, Teacher, Moses wrote to us that if a man's brother dies and leaves his wife behind and leaves no children, his brother should take his wife and raise up offspring to his brother. Now, there were seven brothers. Now that's absolutely foolishness. They build a scenario that is according to folly. This is a folly argument. So this is exactly Proverbs 26, verse 4. Now there were seven brothers. The first took a wife and dying left no offspring. And the second took her and he died, nor did he leave any offspring. And the third likewise. Therefore, the seven, verse 22, had her and left no offspring. Last of all, the woman died. Therefore, in the resurrection, when they rise, whose wife will she be? For all seven had her as a wife.

Now Jesus answered their folly, but he didn't get drawn into the argument. How did he and how do we not get drawn into that foolish argument? He simply quoted the Bible and left it at that. And that's simply all we have to do. Literally, listen to his answer. They went through this whole diatribe of these seven brothers, thinking that they had him. And in verse 24, Jesus answered and said, But concerning the dead, that they rise, have you not read in the book of Moses?

Again, quoting the Bible. In the burning bush passage, how God spoke to him, saying, He is not the God of the dead, but the God of the living. You are therefore greatly mistaken. Boom! He didn't debate with them over the seven brothers at all. He simply quoted the Bible, how they were wrong, and left it there.

Not defensive, he didn't defend himself, he defended God. And when we are argued against, especially from the biblical point of view, which we get quite a bit, answer with the Bible and leave it there. You don't have to defend yourself. Do not answer a fool according to his folly. In other words, don't get drawn into the debate. Simply quote the Word of God and leave it there. And if they disagree, they disagree. Of course they're going to disagree.

Most of the time, they're going to disagree. However, at this time, the Sadducees, at least not all of them, disagree. He blew them away. And you might just find that every once in a while, you answer with the Bible, you just stand on the Bible. And don't defend yourself. You'll literally just blow them away. And then verse 28, And one of the scribes came, having heard the reasoning together and perceiving, that he had answered them well, asked him, Which is the first commandment of all?

And he went on to describe more about answering from the Bible. But when you do that, you don't come across as foolish. Why? Well, we just discussed that in the previous point. Because you didn't use many words. You used very few words. And the words that you use are the words of God. And when you use the Word of God to answer, you shut the mouth of the fool. Use the Bible to defend your answers, and God will defend you. What about the angry person? Okay, now we get into some serious medicine here.

All right? Anger and violence. This is an angry and violent world. And there are some very clear scriptures on how we're supposed to deal with angry people. The first one, the last point we just covered on dealing with someone who always argues with you. And avoid them if you can. However, you can't always avoid angry people. You are going to get into some situations where you are face to face with someone who's a hothead. You might be the only person on the planet that can deal with this hothead, because you follow these principles.

Proverbs 15, verse 1. A soft answer turns away wrath, but harsh words stir with anger. No one is in control of your tongue. You cannot say, yeah, but they did this. And that's why I raised my voice. That's why I furrowed my brow. No one is in control of that. No one is at fault for that. But you. Keep your answers soft. When someone gets loud, balance it with quiet. When someone is harsh, balance it with being gentle. Guys, this works for us as well. Not just you. Not just the women.

Gentlemen, it's not a weak thing to get quiet. And show respect. It actually quells a lot of anger. But you know what? You don't want to hang around angry people. Proverbs 22, verses 24 and 25. Make no friendship with an angry man.

Don't hang around them. And with a furious man, do not go. Lest you learn his ways and set a snare for your soul. If you think, oh, well, I'm a Christian and we need to be accepting of everybody. You become like the people you hang out with. If the people you hang out with are constantly bad-mouthing other people, that's the way you will become. And it leads to sin, Proverbs 29, verse 22.

You can read that at a later time. So what should our motive be in dealing with difficult people? Well, let's go back to the starting point. We'll pick it up in Hebrews, chapter 12. And we'll sum it up here. What should our motive be when dealing with difficult people? We know to give biblical answers. We know to give soft answers. We know to avoid angry people. And we know if we're going to get into trouble, if we proceed along, don't haphazardly proceed along and say, oh, God will take care of it.

God gives us the instructions to avoid certain difficult people. But in the end, and overall, this is our attitude that we're supposed to have. Hebrews, chapter 12, verse 14. You know Hebrews, chapter 12, comes right after Hebrews 11, the faith chapter.

This is the way faithful people behave. Hebrews 12, 14, pursue peace with all people. Yes, even the difficult ones. And holiness without which no one will see the Lord. If it is possible, as much as depends on you, live peaceably with all men. In dealing with difficult people, start with humility. Then, go the extra mile. You might even gain a new friend. Put their needs first, and even go the extra mile.

Try to settle matters quickly with someone who's out to get you. Never seek revenge. Keep yourself above the fray, and let God fight your battles. And when dealing with problem people, the ones that will not have peace with you, avoid them as much as possible. Do not fight back. Answer according to the Word of God, not according to their foolishness.

And remember to give soft answers. But do not hang out with angry people. Have something else to do, or they will drag you into their anger. So what is the key to living in peace with difficult people? Psalm 119. You know the Oh, How Love I Thy Law song? Longest chapter in the Bible. Psalm 119, verse 165. How can you do all of these things? Psalm 119, verse 165. Well, here's an overriding principle that will give us some encouragement.

Great peace have those who love your law. Nothing causes them to stumble. That word stumble is the same word for being offended, and it means fall away from God. It means to fall away. Essentially what God is saying here, and what David is saying through God, through what God is saying through David. There we go. Is, you know what? You're not always going to have an easy go with people. You're not. But you will have peace anyway when you follow God's law. Because He will give you peace, and He will bring them down to nothing eventually. You will never fall away if you love God's law. Proverbs 16, verse 7, going along with that. Proverbs 16, verse 7.

God will defend you. You don't have to defend yourself with difficult people. Proverbs 16, verse 7. When a man's ways please the Lord, he makes even his enemies to be at peace with him. God's involved in this process. He is. If it were up to us, we would be running constantly, or fighting. Take your pick. But God is involved, and following God, and following His law, and loving His law from the heart is the key to peace. And when we live by God's ways, we learn to live the way of peace.

You know, it doesn't mean that all people will like you all the time. In fact, just the opposite. But eventually, all people, even the difficult ones, won't appreciate who you are, but they will appreciate what you are. Because what you will be when you follow God's laws, and you follow all of these principles that we've talked about, is you and I will become peacemakers. And remember what Jesus said, Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be the sons of God. And that's who we want to be. Nothing short of the sons and daughters of the great God. How do we do that? By loving God's law, and learning to be a peacemaker. Thank you.