Marriage

Marriage. Marriage is a very interesting topic. It's something that is not just a topic that adults think about. It's a topic, it seems, that all humans think about, from the very young to the very, very old.

Most humans' approach to marriage comes from some internal drive or desire that we have that actually can begin at a very early age. I remember several weddings at our house when our kids were young, and the weddings went something like this. You'd come into the living room and notice that a lot of the sheets were missing from the linen closet, and they were draped around. The kids had found some of my wife's clothes, and there at the altar was one little girl getting married to another little girl. And the ceremony was being performed by another little girl. And it's something about little girls that love dolls and love the concept of marriage that really is not understood by little boys.

Little boys tend to run from little girls until a certain age, and then they become like Jacob and Rachel. And there's such a fascination. I was just thinking on the way here, there's a lot of things that a young man can bring home. You can bring home your first old car and work on it and feel really excited. You can bring home your first electronic device that's yours.

But when you bring home a woman, and she's all yours, that's a day that is like any other day. And you'll remember how Jacob pursued Rachel for seven years. He did mundane work for his future father-in-law and then was tricked and went another seven years.

There was Ruth pursuing Boettes. Something internally drives people to romantic relationships, it seems. I know at some point, perhaps by your late teens to early twenties, somewhere in there, especially for some reason it seems it's springtime, thoughts turn to love and romance and sometimes weddings take place. But we tend to think of this as something that we thought of as individuals. Ooh, I saw her, I saw him, and I'm really in love with this person. And we think it's us. It's kind of like coming up to conversion, you know? You go through repentance and you want to do something different than you've always done, and you think, well, that's me. In reality, that's really not us. Let's go back to Genesis 2 and verse 18 and see where these romantic inclinations really come from. Genesis 2 and verse 18. And the Lord God said, it is not good that man should be alone. God didn't make humans to be independent. He made them to be unified, to be at one. He created something in our minds that creates in us an inane desire, as it were, to be teamed up and linked to something very intimate, another individual. And so it is, I will make an helper comparable to him. So marriage was God's plan for humanity. He desired and put within us this desire for a strong unity. Now, most people kind of park at this level. They say, okay, marriage is God's plan for man, and we understand that God created it, and okay, you're telling us that he's kind of put these thoughts and these desires in us. Okay, we understand that. And so now we kind of continue on at our human level. And so we begin as humans then to seek fulfillment in our human life through marriage, through this wonderful person that we've fallen in love with or come to know. Perhaps we have the honor to marry them. And so that then becomes our life's peak opportunity for fulfillment. That's a curious thing because God created us different. He created us male and female with different mindsets and different mentalities, different expectations. And so this peak opportunity for fulfillment begins to run into struggles, struggles with the differences, some of the challenges that come along, some of the stresses that come along. And indeed, most marriages fail at some point, and both people agree to go their separate ways. That's just a fact of life. There was a poll to the other half who remained married, and that poll resulted in 5% of them saying that they were very happy in marriage.

So you can see that as humans, we have this passion, as it were, this compulsion to be in an intimate relationship. And yet at the same time, it tends to allude us as far as that fulfillment of a unified and deep relationship. It's common for individuals to want to fix those relationships through counseling. Some will give up and switch partners. Some will continue that process or that quest to try to find some ultimate soulmate that they can really have a unified, one type of mentality relationship with. Well, it's true that human marriages contain the greatest potential for fulfillment on the human level. But that potential is just potential. Let me say that again. Human marriages contain the greatest potential for fulfillment on a human level. But we have this thing called human nature. And we also have things called responsibilities. And we have the difference of the sexes and the mentality of the sexes, the desires, the important perspectives that each of the sexes have. And those things tend to derail our relationships.

So marriage can typically result in one of the greatest failures of human achievement or human fulfillment. Sadly, the thing that could be the greatest is often one of the worst. Now today, some here are married. Some of you young people, and I'm thinking of you young people today, some of you will be married. Some of you in this room were married. And sadly, there are difficulties when a marriage ends, either through a breakup or through a death. Some of you in this room are not married and will not be married. You'll be like the Apostle Paul, who chose not to be married or for some reason ended up not being married. And so we would say that some in this room, and some of you listening at other places, will not marry, or so you think. The title of the sermon today is, Marriage, The Key to a Fulfilled Life. Not a key, the key to a fulfilled life. Remember, we go back to what God said, that He placed man and woman on this earth, and He intended them to be married. Marriage, in fact, is the key to having a fulfilled life. It may surprise you a little bit, and some of you may discount yourself from this role, but as we're going to see, your greatest fulfillment as a living being is going to come through marriage. In Genesis 2, verse 24, it says, There's more to this than just the two joining together and having a nice little family and having children. There is a statement here by God that these two will become one.

And that is God's intent for you and me, and unless we are one, really one, really unified, really one, really of one mind, one spirit, we don't reach the fulfillment that we all seek and that we all desire. We begin to see here a need that God placed in humans for a strong bond. In fact, I dare say that most, I won't say all, but most humans desire something really special with another person. I mean, if they didn't, why would you have romance novels? Why would you have love stories? Why would these things even exist?

Why would people dream and think? Why would they have ambitions to look good and do well? If there weren't some, even a daydream of a really special relationship, and that's what God put in us. He wants us to be joined together and become one.

We have that need. We all have the need for, we might call it romance, we might call it intimacy, something ultra personal, ultra strong in a relationship. And this strong bond, this unity that actually goes beyond what we might just call friendship, is a melding of two into one.

It's far beyond the physical, it's the mental. It's what men and women both need, and God placed it within us. Now, when two people fall in love, we find they don't want to be apart. Some of you have to go back, like me, to that time when you just really fell in love with that special person. And you didn't want to be apart from them, and so you carried a picture of them. You took a picture. You had a phone number where you could make a call. You tried to be as close, you'd stay out as late as you were allowed to, so you didn't have to leave. It didn't have anything to do, it's just that we're not leaving each other until that minute when we have to be apart. And so it's a wonderful thing when people are married and you finally get to go and stay together. You actually go and get to stay in the same place and stay all day and stay all night together. You can stay in the same room, stay in the same bed. It's neat. You don't want to be apart. It's something that men and women feel in common in a strong, unified relationship. The man then wants to build a house. He wants to somehow put things together, bring things together, provide for his girl, for his wife. A woman wants to go in and she has this kind of nesting instinct. She wants to make everything into a home. And so the two have certain responsibilities and certain desires that typically come along between the male and the female. However, reality is that both have responsibilities that thwart that unity, that oneness of being together all the time. You can't just build a house without going off to the woods and chopping down trees, or going off and having a job, a career, working. That separates two individuals. The wife has to go out and be involved in other ways and in other things. You can't have your goods from afar and do all the things that a P.31 woman would do without going out and being industrious and being busy. And so the natural course of human events is there is a separation of the oneness that God created in us to have. And there's no way around it in the best of relationships.

It's almost as if we have an unreasonable need for oneness. But our responsibilities, coupled with our distractions, begin to thwart that oneness, that desire for oneness, repeatedly, over and over and over. It's frustrating. It's irritating. It really haunts every marriage, really. It takes some marriages over the edge. Again, where does this deep desire for oneness that you have and I have, where does this originate from? Let's go back to the author, the creator of it, and listen. In John 17, verse 21, we see the same God now in the human form as Jesus Christ.

And he is making a statement to somebody that He is one with. He says in John 17, 21, that they all may be one. He's addressing our need, the need that God placed within us. As You, Father, are in Me and I in You, that they also may be one in us. There's where that desire comes from, and in fact, there's where that desire will be fulfilled.

In the glory which You gave Me, I have given them that they may be one just as we are one. So we see that on our human level, our oneness is fragmented. But on the godly level, God the Father and Jesus Christ are one. They are perfect one, the ones who have put this desire for it in us.

Verse 23, I in them and you in Me, that they may be perfect in one, and that the world may know that you have sent Me, and have loved them as you have loved Me. See what we have here? We have all the ingredients of romance from the originators of romance, the creators of romance.

Each of them is loving one another in perfect love, and they are in perfect oneness. They are one. We begin to see then that that which you and I are, and that which you and I look for in a human relationship, is merely a type of something larger, something much grander, something that God placed within us as a quest, a lifetime question, something we will not reach in this lifetime, but something we can have a sampling of through various relationships that are a type of our relationship with God and of His relationship with Jesus Christ. The originator of intimacy is God. He has it. Never think of God as just being a big romantic being, do you? God the Father and Jesus Christ are nuts about each other. We don't tend to think of it like that. But if you read through the 17th chapter of John, if you look at some of the things that Jesus Christ wanted and talked about during His lifetime, He missed that relationship. Certain responsibilities caused them to have a physical or spatial separation, but not a mental separation, not a spiritual separation. He wanted to be back there. And He longs now to have that relationship with us. Romance, love, and intimacy, that's what God has, God the Father and Jesus Christ. And He's revealed this to us through romance. It's how we learn about it. It's how we learn about it.

Is this ever fully realized, however? Is the oneness, is the love, is the romance ever fully realized in the human experience? You can take the greatest marriage that you can imagine. I think that's mine, personally. It's the greatest marriage I can personally imagine. Is that love, that oneness, that unity, is that fulfillment, is that fulfilled in my marriage, or your marriage, or any storybook marriage that you may have heard of? I say, no, not at all. I say it's interrupted, it's frustrated, it's sampled, it's learned about, it's sampled once in a while to a very good degree. It's exciting. But there's something that is missing in the human plane, something that we will not realize until we are fully God, and in that same relationship that Jesus Christ has with the Father. In Ephesians 5, 32, we see something that we often call the marriage chapter. If you want some guidance about your marriage, go to Ephesians 5, a little bit of Ephesians 6.

But is Ephesians 5 really a chapter about marriage?

Let's look. Ephesians 5, 32.

He says, this is a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ and the church.

Nevertheless, let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband. Now we read a passage like this, and we say, okay, Christ and the church is a type of a husband and wife.

So we can learn about Christ and the church by looking at the relationship of husband and wife. And oftentimes, many understand this passage only at the couple level. In other words, me and my spouse are a copy of Christ and the church. Is that what it's really talking about?

I dare say that as we take a look at this passage of Scripture, we're going to find it's actually the reverse. This isn't a passage about marriage and husbands and wives and family. It's a passage about God and the family of God using marriage as a type, using it as an example so that we can understand the relationship of God and the church, not the reverse.

Not the reverse at all.

Marriage is a type of us having a fulfilled future. Just like the Sabbath today and the Holy Days are a type of something that will be to come. So it is that God has created marriage so that we can have a type of the relationship that God and His children, that Christ and the bride will have in the future. And just as on the Sabbath, we only see into the future dimly, and we only experience this in a partial level, so within marriage we only experience to a degree and to a partial level that relationship that God has intended for us to have with Him forever.

There's actually two cravings that humans have. One is for romance, and the other is for the opportunity to live happily ever after in romance. You know, you can't have one without the other. You like the intimacy, and the way the old stories of the old films would play out is the guy gets the girl, and at the end, you know, they're writing off into the sunset, and the end comes up. And then it would actually say, and they lived happily ever after. Well, there's a problem with that, because all the people in those old films where it said, and they lived happily ever after, are dead.

So, they didn't live ever after. They lived a while. And you know what it's like as you age, for those of you who are in the process, very far along in the process, you know, you get married and you look great, and you're feeling great and everything, and then all that you were trying to become and be and hang on to, now you're losing.

And you know, things are slipping away. And it is not something that you live happily ever after in just a glorious physical state, at least. And sometimes there's mental challenges as well. And eventually, sadly, one of those married people that may be deliriously happy is going to die. And that's going to cause a tragic end to the relationship.

And death is an enemy. It's a tragic enemy. And so, we may live somewhat intimately as a couple, though it's broken up by all the distractions and responsibilities. And this other desire we have to live forever, as it were, you know, happy ever after, also crumbles. The two things that we want to the most eventually do not work out. Let's go to Ecclesiastes chapter 3 and verse 11. We'll begin in verse 11 of Ecclesiastes 3.

God has made everything beautiful in its time. Now, if it's physical, it has a time. And this book of Ecclesiastes talks about a time for all things.

And so it is. There is a time for things to go extremely well, and there are other times as well.

Notice the next sentence. He has also put eternity in their hearts.

That's something else that God put there. The desire for oneness and the desire to live happily ever after actually are placed in your mind and mind by God.

That is where we will get our happiness. That is where our ultimate fulfillment will come from a strong unified oneness that lasts forever.

And without that, we will not be fulfilled to the level that God has put within us.

Except, he continues, that no one can find out the work that God does from beginning to end.

I know that nothing is better for them than to rejoice and do good in their lives. This is what we are limited to in the physical realm. We are in the tasting phase. We can taste the oneness. We can taste the eternity, but we can't fully participate in it. Again, like the shadow of things to come is our marriage, is our life, is our view of eternity. And so, we can rejoice and do good in our lives. Verse 13, also, that every man should eat and drink and enjoy the good of all his labor. It's the gift of God for this lifetime. But, verse 14, I know that whatever God does, that shall be forever. Now, we're introduced to what we really need, to what we really want, to what the quest is that God is buried deep into the psyche of every one of us. This desire for intimacy that lasts forever. And whatever God makes in the spirit realm will last forever. Nothing can be added to it, and nothing can be taken from it. God does it that men should fear before Him, that they should respect, that they should honor, that they should worship Him. That God that's being spoken of here was the one that became Jesus Christ. He has the oneness. He has the everlasting life.

The happy ever after for His bride, the church. He is the ultimate romantic. And we are asked to participate in a romance that literally goes on and on and on, and is happiness ever after. And so it is here that the subject of marriage and a fulfilling life really takes off.

We will always have it limited in the human form, and it's a wonderful thing to pursue it, to explore it, to enjoy it, and to see its application to Jesus Christ and the church and the family of God to understand it on that level. Let's go back to Ephesians 5 and take a look at the subject of the fifth chapter of Ephesians. Ephesians 5 and verse 1 introduces us here to a topic that is continued on through chapter 5 and into chapter 6. Notice the subject, the topic, stated here in verse 1.

Therefore be imitators of God as dear children. So we see right off the bat that the family is used as the type, not God. We are to be imitators of God as, and showing a type then, a human family as children. Continuing. And walk in love, the mind of God, love, romance, as Christ also loved us and has given Himself for us, an offering and a sacrifice to God, a sweet-smelling aroma. So again, the chapter topic here isn't really about marriage at all. It's about relationships.

The relationship with God and His children, relationship with Jesus Christ and the church. And that is shown in marriage to be a type of Christ and a type of the church. Going on, let's look at just a few samples here in this chapter, verse 5. For this you know that no fornicator, no unclean person, no covetous man who is an idolater, has any inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and God. In other words, to be part of this family, you cannot have a mentality that is different.

You cannot be subscribing to some other individual's mindset. You want to be in this family, you've got to be looking to your lover, the one that you really love, that you really are becoming one with. Not a different mindset. So we're told that. If you want to be in the family of God, the kingdom of God, you want to be part of the bride of Christ, you've got to have the mind that God has, that Jesus Christ has. Dropping down to verse 8.

For you were once in darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Walk as children of light. We were once of a different mindset. We liked different people, as it were. We loved the world. But now we have one that we are focused on, that we have come to love, that we want to be at one with, and we are no longer of that other mindset.

Verse 17. Therefore, do not be unwise, but understand what the will of the Lord is. What is the will of this new person that we are loving, that we are coming to grow close with? What is his will in everything that we think, that we do, that we have a passion for? And how, then, should we orient our lives in order to follow with that will? Going on down to verse 25. Husbands love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave himself for her.

He loves us a lot, in other words. And that's the topic here. He loved those whom the Father is calling, drawing with the Holy Spirit. He loved us so much, he poured everything he had into the relationship. That he might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of the water by the Word.

That he might present her to himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish. So husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. Did Jesus Christ love his own body? Did he love himself? Did he love the church? Notice the next statement. For no one has ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes it and cherishes it. Jesus Christ ate food and he clothed himself. He loved himself. But look what he did. He gave himself to all those who would become Christian, to all those who would follow in the mindset after God drew them to this new way of life, towards the family of God.

For we are members of his body, of his flesh and of his bones. And as an example of this, as a type of this, verse 31, For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.

This is a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ and the church. You see, the topic of chapter 5 and the early part of chapter 6 isn't about marriage, human marriage.

It's about Christ and the church and the family of God and the relationship of perfect unity that we are growing into. But it makes a great example to look at our human state and the things, the opportunities that we have here that God has created in relationships. In verse 33, It's about the parents, parents. It's about grandparents. It's about parents. It's about uncles and aunts. It's about cousins. It's about your own children. Later, it's about your own grandchildren and great-grandchildren. Family is big. What's interesting is that you and I have been told to do certain things, even in the commandments.

And what we have on earth is merely a type of those things. For instance, in verse 1 of chapter 6, Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. Why is that there? Remember, we're not talking about family here. We are talking about relationships with God, and these are types. Why does He throw out children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right? Because that is why we are on earth. We are to obey our Father and our Mother, God and the Church. He goes on to say, Honor your Father and your Mother, which is the first commandment with promise, that it may be well with you and you may live long on the earth.

Honoring our Father in heaven is the first great commandment, and the result of that is living long forever in the family of God. Honoring your physical Father and Mother is merely a type, and the blessing of a long physical life is merely a type of the spiritual commandment, which God gave us, to love Him first, and put nothing else before Him, and to honor Him. So, the first commandment with promise is a mirror of the spiritual commandment that Jesus Christ gave in the Old Testament to Israel, and mentioned again in Matthew 22. We have a Father, we have the Church, that's a Father and a spiritual Mother. John was one of those spiritual parents. You remember back in 1 John, he talks about my little children, talking about the Church members, my little children. That is part of honoring Father and Mother is the Church. At the same time, we honor our physical parents in that type. We are to love our spouse. Jesus Christ is our groom, our husband to be. Now, how many of you here are baptized? Let me see your hands. Do you realize that you are all engaged? When you got baptized, the ring went on your finger, because you were betrothed at that time to the groom Jesus Christ, and you'll be married to Him at His return. Do you understand that you are engaged? That is a serious relationship. That's a loving relationship in which the bride is making herself ready, getting ready for this wedding. It's an exciting time. It's a wonderful opportunity. And so here it is that we are betrothed to Jesus Christ, and we are to not follow another. We're not to be being courted by Satan and his mentality. We're to be developing a very unified oneness with our Lord, our Savior, our Master, but also our husband to be in that type. It's a wonderful thing. The groom has certain responsibilities. The bride has certain responsibilities. The groom, part of his responsibilities, in our case, is that he needed to come and provide a way of escape for us through giving his life and shedding his blood and teaching us. Then another responsibility he personally will take on is to take your mortal physical body, whether it's dead or alive, and to create it into a spirit being that lives forever in total oneness with God. Now, that's the groom's responsibility. That's pretty cool, isn't it? The bride also has responsibilities. We've learned right here what the bride should do. In particular, the bride is to submit herself. In verse 22, Submit to your own husbands as to the Lord, for the husband is the head of the wife, as also Christ is the head of the church and the Savior of the body. Therefore, just as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands and everything. The main type shown here is the spiritual type between Christ and you and me. And the human type is used as an example, and it's created as an example of that. And so, right now, we need to be finding out what the will of God is, submitting to that will, getting rid of any other mentality, and preparing to be with Him forever in a close, unified union. It's pretty expensive. I mean, it's pretty exciting. Pretty exciting. Now, we're told that a wife see that she respects her husband at the end of verse 33. How much do you respect Jesus Christ? These are some questions that are good to ask. But there's more. We're to love the brethren. What are brethren? We only use that term on Sabbath. Six days a week, we say, brothers and sisters. So, we're to love our brothers and sisters. That's part of the family. Spiritual brothers and sisters in God's church. We're also to love our neighbor as ourselves. Neighbors can be next-door neighbors, people at work, people in society. They can also be any human being, including those right in our own household.

But Jesus Christ, how much did He love your neighbors and your coworkers and the people who would slander and spitefully use you? Well, He loved them so much, He gave His life for them. We need to come on board with that mentality, see? We need to also be part of this unity and part of this mentality that God has. So, whether we are physically married right now, or physically single, as the Apostle Paul was, at least at one point in his life, we are all in a marriage-type of relationship with God.

And it is actually that relationship that is the one that is going to give us the fulfillment, the ultimate fulfillment of romance and a life happy ever after. That's the one. I'd like to give you three points today that will help you in all your relationships, physical and spiritual. If we apply these three points, we can succeed and do very well in growing in the oneness, the unity, the intimacy with Jesus Christ. We can also grow in those same things in physical relationships, including marriage.

So, let's take a look at three points. The first one is to recommit yourself to your spouse each morning. Re-commit yourself to your spouse each morning. Now, you might think, well, where do you get this point? Well, I got it right out of the Bible. It's what Jesus Christ himself taught us to do. Turn with me over to Matthew 6, verse 9.

This is the intent, I believe, of the model prayer outline, which we are to pray every day since it does have the word daily in there. This is a reconnection with our spiritual spouse to be. This is a daily recommitment to God and to Jesus Christ. This model outline begins with our Father in heaven, holy is your name. Now, the one thing that we learn right away is spouses are different. God and Jesus Christ, who is the one whom we love, and yeah, we want to be in this type of marriage when he returns, his symbolic marriage, he's different than we are.

He's in heaven. Sometimes women think, guys are really different the way they think, or men are, you know, perplexed with how women think. Well, that's true. That's the way it is between spouses. Whether it's a spiritual, physical plane or a male, female plane, there is a difference. Viva la difference. Let's look at it. It says here in verse 9, Our Father in heaven, you're different than me, you're very uniquely positioned and have different responsibilities than me, holy is your name.

You are special. In other words, I honor you. I really think you're neat. That is really something that helps us every day reconnect with God. If you would apply this to a human marriage and reconnect with your maid in the morning, if you said, oh, in a similar way mentally, maybe even during prayer, just asking God to help you be a good husband or a wife today and help you serve, but if you just kind of went through the same mentality with your spouse every day and think, first of all, my spouse, which is really unique compared to me, I think my wife is heavenly.

So, whoa. You're really different. Holy is your name. You're special. If I were to think of her as special, you are really special. I wouldn't say she's in a story holier, you know, but she is in God's eyes. I guess she probably should be in mine, but in that human level, though, you see how the relationship gets off on one day right here in just the first couple of thoughts? Then you go on. The idea of wanting the will of God follows when it says, Your kingdom come, Your will be done.

If we look at God's kingdom and say, No, it's you, it's about the future, I want Christ to return, I want this wedding to take place, I want to be the bride, I want to help, I want to serve, I want to help put this world on its feet, we say all the craziness that goes on in the world in big ways, in little ways, love to be involved in changing it all. Bring it on. We want to help. A wife wants to help her husband. She says, You know, I want your plans, your goals to work out, your will to be done.

Just like a husband would say to the wife, I want to know what your ideals and objectives are in life, and I want to help you fulfill that and be a very fulfilled person. See how these can work on a spiritual plane and a human plane? And if we do this daily, look who the focus is on. It's not on the self, is it?

It's what can we do to participate, to help, to honor, to respect? And so it goes on to other things, like, give us this day our daily bread? Well, with God, we need the spiritual food. We need Jesus Christ in our life. We hunger and thirst for that, as it says in chapter 5. And on a physical plane, we need to provide that physical food for each other within a family.

A husband has a role in the food and the clothing, the wife has the role in the food and the clothing. There are responsibilities in life. And forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors. We want God to forgive us of our sins and to wipe them out so we can have a stronger relationship with us. We should want the same with our spouse. You know, forgive me for my shortcomings. And just as I forgive you for yours, we've got a new day here. We're recommitting, clean slate. You know, we move upward, we move onward. Don't lead us into temptation. Or do not allow... Help us, is what I pray. That's how I interpret this. God, help me, help us not to be led into temptation. As we use the various battle armor that Paul talks of in Ephesians 6 chapter, as we put on this whole armor of God, help us to use it. Help us not to be led into some other thing spiritually. And also, on a physical level, help us not to be led into temptation, to be thinking about anybody else. Just as you and I don't want to be thinking about Satan and the world and following that, nor do we want anybody else to get into a relationship. But deliver us from the evil one. God and I know that we have the evil one in the relationship, just waiting and trying. And Mary and I know that we have the evil one in the relationship, just waiting and trying. And so those both work on both levels. We've got to fight Satan. We've got to fight our human nature. For yours is the kingdom and the power and the glory forever. Ultimately, it's God. He has the kingdom. That's what we want. He has the power to obtain the kingdom and to translate us into the kingdom. He has the glory that He has and He will give us. And forever, there it is. Happy ever after. So it's a wonderful thing to commit ourselves to God every day. But we must treasure our commitment to our spouse, God and our physical spouse. Keep that primary in life. You might say, well, maybe not every day. What if you commit to your spouse or to God once a year? Maybe you come out at Passover time. Yeah, I think I'll want to be godly again. I think I want to please God and I'll think of that once a year. Is that enough? You think you could do that with your spouse, maybe on your anniversary each year? Oh, it's been another year. Yeah, I think I'm going to make you prime in my life this year.

And I won't do that again until next year. I wouldn't really accomplish much, would it? That's why God wants us to do it every day with Him. And that's why I've personally found a big difference when, in prayer, I ask God to help me do that with my wife every day. It gives it that fresh daily perspective that is so important. We must resist any distractions, pressures to refocus that commitment anywhere else. It is the factor that's going to determine the success or failure of your relationship with God or with your spouse. It's your level of commitment. Here's a quote from Norman Wright in a book called, So You're Getting Married. Now, just imagine the title a minute. So you're getting married! All you young people either physically getting married or all you young people who want to be involved in the great wedding supper when Jesus Christ returns. So you're getting married! Well, here's what he says. You must fight to keep your commitment to your lover primary in your life. You must resist the pressures to share that commitment with any other facets of life. The most vital factor that will determine the success or failure of your marriage is your level of commitment to it. And so point number one is to recommit yourself to God every day and recommit yourself to your spouse every day.

If you do it in prayer, if you do it in word, if you do it in deed to your divine spouse to be, to your human spouse, then that level of commitment will be a lot higher than it otherwise would have been. This was, remember, the lesson of Ephesians chapter 5, to be committed to God, just as we are to be also committed to our spouse.

The second point is to respect and admire your spouse. To respect and admire your spouse. We've already seen in the model prayer that Jesus Christ has a start-off with, holy is your name, a respect and admiration for that which we desire a oneness with, for eternity.

Romans chapter 12 and verse 10 says, Be kindly affectionate to one another with brotherly love, in honor giving preference to one another.

If we start off and continue a relationship with this level of affection, brotherly love, honor giving preference to the other, then we have respect and admiration. But if we somehow get of the mindset that, well, I don't see things through a lens that is not good, not right, not pleasant, not whatever, some people look at God through a lens of criticism. They have a lot of problems with God. And the same people tend to look through the same lens at their spouse. And all they can see is flaws. All they can see is lacks. They live in a very poor world where nothing is working, nothing is good, everything is broken, everything needs fixing. That's a terrible place to live. However, there's another person that will humble themselves and realize that I'm defective. And I realize that anything human also will have defects in it. But God is perfect, and we're all striving to become like God. And therefore, all those that are trying to be like God are therefore honorable. They're admirable. They're the ones who God calls holy and just and good and His future kings, people who are to be given His name, and what an honor it is to be around them. What an honor it is to be married to one of them.

What an honor it will be to meet Jesus Christ in the air at what is called the wedding of the bride and the lamb.

When you esteem others more highly than yourself, your world is a pretty neat world to live in. When everybody around you is better than you are, that's a pretty cool place.

It really is. It really is a great place that is rich.

In Ephesians 5, verse 33, that last verse that we read of the chapter, it says, Nevertheless, let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband. And the wife here is the church, and the husband is Jesus Christ. How much, how often do you find yourself really respecting your husband to be? Hmm, that's a good question. A relationship that is going to be strong has one respecting the other highly.

In 1 Peter 3, verse 7, it says, Did Jesus Christ give honor to the bride? Didn't he come and honor her? Didn't he give himself for her? Didn't he put her up on a pedestal? Didn't he take her, as it says in the Old Testament, and clean her up and bedeck her with jewels? Didn't he honor her? Didn't he come back and put her in a place of great honor? You know, if you humble yourself and consider your spouse and your spouse to be much more highly than yourself, then every day is going to be full of awe, isn't it?

It's going to be, wow, Jesus Christ wants to marry me. Wow, we're going to live forever. We're going to be happy ever after. We're going to have kids, so many kids, it will mess with your mind. You know, the fall feasts are all about the big harvest that Christ and the bride start working on. Wow, this is awesome. Appreciation comes from within. It's a choice. It's a lens we choose. Do we desire to be critical or do we desire to appreciate?

You know, the term thankful is one that we'll get into at some point. But thankfulness and appreciation, if it's dwelt upon, can really change a life. Consider what Paul said in Philippians 4 and verse 8. He said, finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure... Now, let's stop there just a minute. Who are we talking about? Well, in this concept, we're talking about a spouse. In this context, let's apply these to Jesus Christ, who's the great bridegroom.

Notice, finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true. He is truth. He was the logos. God's Word is truth. He comes in righteousness and truth. He is the ultimate truth. Therefore, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble... There's none no more noble than Jesus Christ. Whatever things are just, He is the Savior of the just. Whatever things are pure, He is pure, absolute, white, sinless. Whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there's any virtue, if there's anything praiseworthy, meditate on these things.

Now, a husband is a type of Christ. And, you know, husbands have some lacks, first of all. Women have trouble trusting their husbands, because we're not 100% true like Jesus Christ is. The Bible says, let God be true in every man and a liar, and that's pretty much the way it is. But men in the church are getting better at that.

And noble... Yes, Christ is perfectly noble, but men are growing in nobility. And so are women, things that are just and pure and lovely and good report, virtue and praiseworthy. We should see these in our mate. We should choose to see them in our mate, and we should choose not to see the others. It's a choice we make to respect and to admire.

And the third point is to love and to serve. It's one thing to commit. It's another thing to stand back to respect and admire, but you've got to participate. To love and to serve, that is where the rubber beats the road, as they say. That's where we really become involved. That's where this relationship becomes a true relationship. In 1 Peter 4, verses 8 and 9, it talks about the level of love that you and I need with our spouse, spiritual and physical.

1 Peter 4, verse 8. And above all things have fervent love for one another. Nothing makes my wife more happy than fervent love from me. And vice versa. On a human plane, it doesn't get any better than fervent love. Well, that's what God wants from you and me. He wants us to love Him with our heart, our soul, our might, our heart, our mind, our body, our human body.

All that is in our might and in our mind. That's the kind of love He wants. He wants fervent love. He wants to be in love with us. He's the romantic, remember? That's what He desires from you and me. For love will cover a multitude of sins. It does with God. It does with your human spouse. God is perfect. We're not. But when we show love to Him, He says, Hey, they're trying to be like us.

Let's get rid of all those negative things. Let's focus on their thinking, their loving, their serving. Look at that. Get rid of that other stuff. And we're focusing. See, it's a choice. Love covers a multitude of sins because God's not interested in the sins if we're trying to love. Same with the human relationship. My wife can see defects in me, but if she sees that I'm loving and serving, she says, Well, get rid of the defects. He's loving and serving. Get rid of those defects.

He's loving and serving. You see? It's the mental approach. Love does cover a multitude of sins because the intent is good. Be hospitable to one another without grumbling. And as each one has received a gift, minister it to one another. Have you received a gift? I'm sure you have. As a human spouse, you have certain gifts that the other person does not have. As we mentioned, Jesus Christ in the spiritual relationship has certain gifts that you and I don't have.

But we have certain gifts to bring to the table as well. And so he says, as each one has received a gift, don't compare yourself among yourselves. Just give it. Serve with it. Love with it. Do it. Minister it to one another as good stewards of the manifold grace of God. In conclusion, we have seen today our greatest potential for fulfillment, and it comes through marriage. Whether you do or you will have a human marriage is not the ultimate in this topic.

Whether you will be single in this life, like the Apostle Paul, no matter what, endeavor to have the most fulfilling relationships that you can by using these three points. These three points will apply to any relationship, and it will make it the most fulfilling and most rewarding that it can be. Commitment, respect, and love. If we put these into our relationships and endeavor to enhance those relationships, we will ultimately be as fulfilled as we can be as humans, and we will reach the total fulfillment that God has placed in our hearts from the time that we were born. So live with Him forever. Let's conclude by reading Revelation 19, verses 6 through 9.

Revelation 19, beginning in verse 6.

And I heard, as it were, the voice of a great multitude and the sound of many waters, and as the sound of mighty thundering, saying, and this is not God speaking. This is somebody who's really excited. This is a bunch of individuals who are really excited, and they are saying, Alleluia, for the Lord God omnipotent reigns, Jesus Christ has returned. Let us be glad and rejoice and give Him glory, for the marriage of the Lamb has come, and His wife has made herself ready.

Here is the marriage that is the total fulfillment of the experience of life that God has put within you and me. And to her it was granted to be arrayed in fine linen, clean and bright, for the fine linen is the righteous acts of the saints. These are the ones who were committed. These are the ones who were honoring and respecting, and these are the ones who were loving, and the result was white garments of righteousness. And then He said to me, Right! Oh, how supremely blessed are those who are called to the marriage supper of the Lamb. And He said to me, These are the true sayings of God. As humans, let's endeavor to make our relationships as unifying as we possibly can. And as Christians, let's deepen our intimacy and our long-term relationship with the family of God.